I am sorry your family is going through this. We had the same issue with my mom years ago.They didn't communicate with us or as professionals with each other well at all.
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Mental health question
- Thread starter charliana
- Start Date
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #42
Doctors are still going g back and forth. After the cancer doctor insisting that her problems are not related to the cancer, just the dementia, the reason the listed for hospice was progressive cancer. I am going to wonder for the rest of my life if we let them take her off her dementia medicine too soon.
Holy Heck... frustrating doesn't begin to cover the situation they're putting you through! **HUgs** Hopefully you'll get the correct answers soon.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #44
Yesterday was horrible. We were talking about the free home health care running out in 4 to 5 months. The hospice nurse interrupted to explain why she didn't think we had that long. She thought we had a month left. My mom understood what she was saying and started crying.
I think her cats know. The tomcat used to hide behind the washer and dryer when I first started staying overnight. He is still scared of everyone else, but he has been tame with me. Yesterday they were both extra clingy. The one that wasn't always friendly even wanted to be picked up and held.
I think her cats know. The tomcat used to hide behind the washer and dryer when I first started staying overnight. He is still scared of everyone else, but he has been tame with me. Yesterday they were both extra clingy. The one that wasn't always friendly even wanted to be picked up and held.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #45
How bad can you luck be. I havnt slept for 3 days because mom got worse and I had to give her medication every 4 hours through the night. I thought we still had more time, so i still went to work during the day. She died tonight. After hospice left we were sitting there talking about funeral arrangements, my husband calls in severe pain. Now we are in the emergency room. I don't know when I get to sleep again.
I’m very sorry for your loss. 
I hope your husband feels better soon. 
I hope your husband feels better soon. 
My God, I pray you find some kind of space and peace soon....you have been through so much more than a person ought to. You have not even had time to grieve properly for Bam Bam and now your mom!
Please try to take some comfort in the fact they are both at peace now because they carry your love with them. They are free from suffering an sending their love to you for what you did and what you went through.
Remember that it takes time and a lot of it to heal your broken heart, you never get over soemthing like this, you get through it. It takes time to make a new life's order for yoruself. But it WILL get better, though right now you haev been through so much it feels like this is never ending......Guilt, anger, such extreme sadness that makes you forget to breathe will all come with grief. Breathe. Try to get some sleep and food, get a routine going so you don't have to think much. Concentrate on comforting yoru father and the two cats that are left. Keep busy and concentrate on the next crisis, your husband. How is he doing? I am sure this has been a big strain on him too, he probably feels lost and doen't know what to do to help. You have been through enough. Know I will keep you and your husband, yoru father and the remaining cats in my thoughts and prayers. My heart goes out to you, we are always here for you, please share your grief so we can help with the burden......May God bring you some room to breathe, may He bless you for what you have been doing, for what you have been through and for what is to come. You are stronger than you think!
RIP precious Bam Bam. RIP for your mother. May the good Lord bless and keep them, until you meet again!
Please try to take some comfort in the fact they are both at peace now because they carry your love with them. They are free from suffering an sending their love to you for what you did and what you went through.
Remember that it takes time and a lot of it to heal your broken heart, you never get over soemthing like this, you get through it. It takes time to make a new life's order for yoruself. But it WILL get better, though right now you haev been through so much it feels like this is never ending......Guilt, anger, such extreme sadness that makes you forget to breathe will all come with grief. Breathe. Try to get some sleep and food, get a routine going so you don't have to think much. Concentrate on comforting yoru father and the two cats that are left. Keep busy and concentrate on the next crisis, your husband. How is he doing? I am sure this has been a big strain on him too, he probably feels lost and doen't know what to do to help. You have been through enough. Know I will keep you and your husband, yoru father and the remaining cats in my thoughts and prayers. My heart goes out to you, we are always here for you, please share your grief so we can help with the burden......May God bring you some room to breathe, may He bless you for what you have been doing, for what you have been through and for what is to come. You are stronger than you think!
RIP precious Bam Bam. RIP for your mother. May the good Lord bless and keep them, until you meet again!
I’m so sorry to hear all this. All this at once is…more than a lot. 
I hope you can rest soon and your husband is feeling better now too.
I hope you can rest soon and your husband is feeling better now too.
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I am so sorry for your loss and for all you have been going through!
Just remember 2 things, God never allows us more than we can handle and everything happens for a reason
.Take 3 deep breaths and have faith!
Prayers & Blessings to you and your family
.- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #50
He had a ruptured appendix. He is in worse pain today than yesterday. He had a bad nurse yesterday. I had went home to check on dad, and feed the cats. She kept telling him she was checking on his pain meds and left him in pain all day while I was gone. The next nurse that came in found him at a pain level of 9 and said he was supposed to be getting pain meds every 2 hours, and another one every 4 hours.
charliana
holy cow batman - this is a lot for one soul to be going through. I'm so very very sorry.Seems healthcare is not what it once was in any country these days. I'm so sorry that you are not only having to deal with all this loss, pain, confusion, and caregiving exhaustion - but that the other humans that are suppose to be helping, not just becasue it's their job, but their responsibility as human beings, are failing you.
Sending prayers and good vibes your way - and hoping you get a health care caregiver in that actually remembers what they are suppose to be doing for their fellow humans.
XOXOXOXO
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It's a weekend so it may be difficult, but try to talk to the hospital's Patient Representative today; she or he needs to know about this. If the Patient Representative isn't available on weekends, try to talk to them on Monday. If you have the name of the bad nurse it will be useful – write it down – but even if you don't know her name it will be in the hospital's records which nurse was assigned to him yesterday. Write down the date and time that he had problems (I don't mean the exact times she said she was checking on his meds – I'm sure you don't have that – just the general time of day, so they'll know which shift she was on).
I assume they did emergency surgery to remove it yesterday?
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #54
Yes, they are keeping him at least another day. He can't come home with the pain he currently has, and they have to make sure they get rid of the infection completely since when it ruptured it spread infection and stool in his abdomen.
The timing of this is horrible, we had to change the dates of all the meetings with the funeral home and pastor. My guess is they are going to release him the date we rescheduled the meetings for.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #55
She is back today. When she told my husband she would check on the pain meds again, the good nurse from the night shift came and told her the pain meds he was supposed to be getting.
I think she almost made another mistake today. She was looking at his chart, and I heard her say "oh my god" then she went and got some medication and a shot right after that.
The shot had to be insulin. When he went in his blood sugar was 427, they have been trying to bring his levels down. I think it is 183 now. I think the inflammation from this did something because he was passing his. Physicals a couple months ago without high blood sugar.
Yes, stress and illness can each raise blood sugar levels. I have type 2 diabetes, and when I get really angry or frustrated my blood sugar levels go dangerously high. I'm on Zoloft for depression, and I keep some in my pill box with my diabetes meds, because when anger is the cause of a blood sugar spike the Zoloft will bring it down within about 15 minutes.
From what you say it sounds like the nurse may have learned her lesson.
Certainly nurses should know that stress raises blood glucose levels, so perhaps she's put that together with the missing pain meds and reached the correct conclusion.
