Meela's dad died suddenly and I am so heart-broken

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meelasmom

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Also Just a quick note. Thank you all for who have replied.
Yesterday morning we lost our dog, Ace, of almost 11 years to cancer and an infection in is foot. It was very traumatic and sad. It's been a terrible week since last Sunday. My only comfort is that Meeka and Meela are together. The pain of losing all of them is still there. Death is death no matter if it's expected or not.
 
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meelasmom

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I agree with Solomonar, check for toxic plants on your property... I know some lilies are deadly to cats if the cats chew on them, and there are other plant species which are equally dangerous to our 4-legged friends. 😥
It wasn't a plant that killed him. We now know there is a heart/lung condition his breed can die from. It's a bit of a relief that his death wasn't at my hands, but I still miss him so much and am very sad.
 
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meelasmom

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I am very sorry for your loss. You are a very nice person, to care cats so much!
Tears and tuna for Meeka the Cat!
+++
Returning to practical aspects (whatever difficult may be) :
- difficult to spot the cause, I agree; but checking for poisonous plants around does not harm anyway (keep in mind that cats have different vulnerability profile than humans, so look for official lists)
- same as above for the kitchen (Chocolate? Grapes? Etc.)
- schedule a prevention screening plan at a trusted vet (it might be expensive, but is anyway cheaper than any treatment)- prevention in feline medicine is rather rare
- set a routine to self-check health status aka look closer at the gums and eyes, touch various parts of the body looking for cat reaction
- reach out, make more friends and discuss more (small talk is OK) to increase your psychological resilience
Thanks for the tips. Meeka did not die from plant or any other poisoning as I had considered after his death. See my response below for the details.
 
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meelasmom

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Wow, 2 pet deaths one week a part. My house feels quite empty without them there. My son is really struggling with the death of his (our) dog, Ace. Ace was born at our home and died in our home. My son came down around 4:30 am Sunday morning to check on him and found him in his last 15 minutes of his life. Ace was panting and scared. Jake held his paw and with my husband, they soothed him and just let him know he wasn't alone and that he was loved very much. Jake was Ace's favorite person in the entire world. As hard as it was to see him go right in front of us, it was comforting to know that his suffering was over and that his "person" was right there with him as he would have wanted.

Meeka: after talking to a vet, we now believe he did not die from choking on anything. Meeka was a domestic Turkish Angora. That breed along with Maine Coon cats have a risk of a medical condition called Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy or HCM. At the time, I blamed myself for not doing more for him. I was completely blown away and in shock about his death and felt so much guilt and pain. I felt like I didn't do enough to save him. Now I know in my heart that there was nothing I could have done. When he was fixed, the vet had noted on his paperwork that they thought they detected a heart murmur. He had always been quite healthy, so we didn't think much of it. A couple weeks back, I now remember at least one time that Meeka was laying like he was awake, but not really moving. I think this was the lethargic period that is part of HCM. I woke him up and thought it was odd, but didn't put anymore thought into it. I recently found a dark blue sheet that he had been laying up upstairs when he napped. It had a couple spots of white dried vomit-like stuff on it. Meeka was also not overweight but a heavier cat. My guess is that he was around15 pounds. He was big, but not fat. I thought he was mostly muscle. He was active, but did sleep more than he had been. HCM most often ends in sudden death. Their oxygen is cut off due to their heart and that's why his tongue was blue/purple and he couldn't breathe.

I guess all of these things did not register for me at the time because of the shock of just losing him so suddenly. HCM is a fatal disease if not treated and even then, it's not always a good ending even if surgery is involved. After reading about HCM, all these little things started popping into my head. It makes sense now. He was almost 6 years old and was wise enough to not be chewing on thread, plastic or plants. I had so many thoughts of how or why this happened in my home, making me believe it was something I missed or somehow my fault. And even though now I understand this was not directly my fault, it doesn't change the pain of losing him. I miss that boy so very much. I knew he loved me very much and he knew that I loved him very much, too

I have his 2 children Tink & Ivy (my twins) who are also domestic Turkish Angora and I am scared to death about them having the same condition, but I can't sit around worrying and crying over something I can't control. They have to go to go the vet in February, so I will have them review their heartbeats and health. (Tink just went last week for his flea shot (he is allergic to fleas) and they said everything looked good). A murmur was one of the signs and if they don't have one, then they might not have this condition. I am just going to love them as long as I have them and give them the best life I can.
 

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M meelasmom , your last post made me cry.
It is so unfair that after all you had to go through with Meela, now you have to suffer again for Meeka and then Ace as well. It is really unfair, and honestly I don't know how you can stand this mountain of grief, you must have a strong heart.

My thoughts are with you.
RIP Meeka, RIP Ace, RIP Meela, now you can play together at the Bridge :sniffle:
 
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meelasmom

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M meelasmom , your last post made me cry.
It is so unfair that after all you had to go through with Meela, now you have to suffer again for Meeka and then Ace as well. It is really unfair, and honestly I don't know how you can stand this mountain of grief, you must have a strong heart.

My thoughts are with you.
RIP Meeka, RIP Ace, RIP Meela, now you can play together at the Bridge :sniffle:
Thank you Antonio. I appreciate your thoughts. It's been a difficult time. We knew we were going to lose Ace. None of us could bring ourselves to put him down. Other than his foot, he was the same old dog we had for almost 11 years. I really do miss him. But losing Meeka was extremely hard. He was there and then he was gone with no warning. The signs of what he died from all started coming back to me after the fact. I am relieved that it wasn't my fault and I know in my heart there was nothing that could be done. But the pain of losing him and the shock of it really does get me where I find myself breaking down. It's not the same as losing Meela because that was at my own hands by listening to a vet that distorted the truth. I still feel that she might still be here today had I not acted to abruptly. I will always get a second opinion in the future. My heart does ache because 2 deaths in one week exactly was a lot to deal with. Telling my daughter was tough, too. He was hers, but he was mine. So I know she loved him very much, also. The difference was that I helped raise him until she moved out for college and then after. It's my routine of not seeing him pop in on my bed each morning or when he came running to me when I called any other cat name. He was a joy and I am so proud to have had him as mine.

I'm hanging in there, but some days it feels like I'm holding on by a thread. This will be the first Christmas without him in 6 years and 11 years for Ace. It's going to be a sad time, but we will get through it. My kids all have a heart of gold and love pets as much as I do.

I feel like I am driving Ivy & Tinkerton crazy by smothering them with love. I just want to keep them close and hold them as long as I have them.
 

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Every time a hear of the loss of a dear friend i shed a tear, I feel the pain that is left behind. I am so sorry for your loss. I am not a vet but have heard that the symptoms you described are often due to a heart condition. Prays for you during this incredibly painful time.
 
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