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- Oct 24, 2018
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Me again!
We have 2 female cats and 1 male cat. the male and female are older (around 8yrs) and have been together their whole lives. we recently got a kitten this year. they have all adjusted amazingly after very carefully introducing them each by the recommended way... except during play.
my male cat has always gotten overly aggressive during play with our other cat, and now he's doing the same with the kitten which is making me even more nervous because she's tiny and impressionable and we can't always watch them every second. any time they are playing I have to make sure I watch them when I'm around in case things get out of hand. at night she sleeps with my brother so they are separated at night thankfully. sometimes he is nice and rolls over and gently plays with them, but with both of the females he seems to get jealous sometimes? usually after I spend time with the other cats more is when it happens, or when he has zoomies, despite me spending the most time with him bc he's in my room almost 24/7 and I have to also care for his allergies and what not.
he goes full hunting mode when things start escalating, chasing them on their tail like a bloodhound and you can visibly see how rough he's being because he is just as rough when he plays with me (I don't hand play but he still does it sometimes). he has always completely ignored their blood curling growls and hisses, and he's heavier than they are so he's often on top which makes it worse. he tends to resist and continue to pursuit even when I try to separate them or even have to make a loud noise to snap him out of it. then he walks off with his tail high in the air like he's proud! I always get so panicked and disturbed when this happens. all I can do is break them up, give him a timeout from my room, and talk sternly to him, but even then he seems happy with what he's done unless I really drill him with my angry talk!
-------------- below is just extra about what happened today
this morning he trapped the kitten into a corner, was on top of her attacking her while she was growling and hissing and struggling. this happened right after I was playing with her, went to the bathroom real quick, and she was hanging out by the door waiting for me when I hear her get hit into the door and start growling and hissing. she NEVER cries that bad when playing with my other cat (who plays normally and healthily with her, they both understand hissing means stop) I immediately knew it was my male cat so I had to cut bathroom break short and chase them to the living room where he was hounding the poor tiny thing as she was crying like hell!
when i got them apart he had chunks of fur on his mouth and she was licking herself and flicking her paw like crazy (I checked her for scratches). she was visibly upset and wouldn't even come to me, and my other cat was horrified and went to go check on her as well, sniff her and clean her and whatnot. I was so angry and just terrified i admit I lost my temper, i pushed his butt along with my foot so he'd move away from the scared thing, along with some water splashes and a light cuff on his ear. I gave him a long scolding, then locked him out of my room where he was headed with his tail high. i really wanted to show him I was upset with his behavior because he was still acting all proud and happy and lingering around her.
I try to play with him to get his energy out but he barely wants to play other than play fighting and spends most of the time in my room or following me around when I leave my room. I genuinely think he's a little iffy in the head or wasnt socialized well at the shelter because he's always been like this no matter how many times I separate them when fights escalate and tell him things like "No playing rough, be nice!". I don't like losing my temper and resorting to water splashes or even just scolding when it happens, but what else can I do when he seems to go deaf to growling and hissing and obvious pain even with us? hes usually very sweet and gentle but when this happens it's like a switch just flips. he doesn't growl or hiss at ALL during playfights even when he's upset which makes me think he's either mentally/socially messed up/underdeveloped or he's just so focused on hunting that he doesn't realize it's his playmate! he appears to get jealous but never wants to play, then takes his anger out on the cat who was getting attention.
sorry for the long post, I'm so frustrated and still upset with even myself for losing my temper but I'm so worried about the kitten and even still our adult cat getting hurt because this isn't the first time and nothing I do- being calm/nice nor scolding- has worked
We have 2 female cats and 1 male cat. the male and female are older (around 8yrs) and have been together their whole lives. we recently got a kitten this year. they have all adjusted amazingly after very carefully introducing them each by the recommended way... except during play.
my male cat has always gotten overly aggressive during play with our other cat, and now he's doing the same with the kitten which is making me even more nervous because she's tiny and impressionable and we can't always watch them every second. any time they are playing I have to make sure I watch them when I'm around in case things get out of hand. at night she sleeps with my brother so they are separated at night thankfully. sometimes he is nice and rolls over and gently plays with them, but with both of the females he seems to get jealous sometimes? usually after I spend time with the other cats more is when it happens, or when he has zoomies, despite me spending the most time with him bc he's in my room almost 24/7 and I have to also care for his allergies and what not.
he goes full hunting mode when things start escalating, chasing them on their tail like a bloodhound and you can visibly see how rough he's being because he is just as rough when he plays with me (I don't hand play but he still does it sometimes). he has always completely ignored their blood curling growls and hisses, and he's heavier than they are so he's often on top which makes it worse. he tends to resist and continue to pursuit even when I try to separate them or even have to make a loud noise to snap him out of it. then he walks off with his tail high in the air like he's proud! I always get so panicked and disturbed when this happens. all I can do is break them up, give him a timeout from my room, and talk sternly to him, but even then he seems happy with what he's done unless I really drill him with my angry talk!
-------------- below is just extra about what happened today
this morning he trapped the kitten into a corner, was on top of her attacking her while she was growling and hissing and struggling. this happened right after I was playing with her, went to the bathroom real quick, and she was hanging out by the door waiting for me when I hear her get hit into the door and start growling and hissing. she NEVER cries that bad when playing with my other cat (who plays normally and healthily with her, they both understand hissing means stop) I immediately knew it was my male cat so I had to cut bathroom break short and chase them to the living room where he was hounding the poor tiny thing as she was crying like hell!
when i got them apart he had chunks of fur on his mouth and she was licking herself and flicking her paw like crazy (I checked her for scratches). she was visibly upset and wouldn't even come to me, and my other cat was horrified and went to go check on her as well, sniff her and clean her and whatnot. I was so angry and just terrified i admit I lost my temper, i pushed his butt along with my foot so he'd move away from the scared thing, along with some water splashes and a light cuff on his ear. I gave him a long scolding, then locked him out of my room where he was headed with his tail high. i really wanted to show him I was upset with his behavior because he was still acting all proud and happy and lingering around her.I try to play with him to get his energy out but he barely wants to play other than play fighting and spends most of the time in my room or following me around when I leave my room. I genuinely think he's a little iffy in the head or wasnt socialized well at the shelter because he's always been like this no matter how many times I separate them when fights escalate and tell him things like "No playing rough, be nice!". I don't like losing my temper and resorting to water splashes or even just scolding when it happens, but what else can I do when he seems to go deaf to growling and hissing and obvious pain even with us? hes usually very sweet and gentle but when this happens it's like a switch just flips. he doesn't growl or hiss at ALL during playfights even when he's upset which makes me think he's either mentally/socially messed up/underdeveloped or he's just so focused on hunting that he doesn't realize it's his playmate! he appears to get jealous but never wants to play, then takes his anger out on the cat who was getting attention.
sorry for the long post, I'm so frustrated and still upset with even myself for losing my temper but I'm so worried about the kitten and even still our adult cat getting hurt because this isn't the first time and nothing I do- being calm/nice nor scolding- has worked
