Lost my cat to lymphoma cancer

[CaesarCat]

Hi folks,

I recently had to put my 10 year old to sleep (on my birthday) because he deteriorated so quickly. He was tested for Lympthoma via biopsy which came back with no cancerous cells found and started treatement for IBD.

It started with diarrhoea initially then came the vomiting which was 2-3 times a day. and despite the negative cancerous cells from the biopsy his vet believed this was more likely than IBD due to how much sickness was occurring.

He was receiving monthly depo, vitamin B12 injections which initially helped but the last course failed and he went downhill.

It started with him stopping drinking his water, then his pro biotic hard food and then not eating his soft food and started staying out (always was an outdoor boy) but this became constant to the point I had to go to my neighbours door in the street door to retrieve him as believed he was staying there to die.

He had lost so much weight to the point you could feel his spine when clapping him and the decision had to be made on the 26/10/2022 when I put my fur baby to sleep.

I am broken, I went through this when I was younger with my indoor cat however this has affected me and I genuinely don't know how I'll get over it.

I feel guilty and have spent a large part of my days googling and researching online (which lead me to find this forum) about whether I could have done more but my head told me he was giving up between the stress of his treatment and constant visit to the vets as well of how sick he was.

 

[Allison_n_Rex]

I truly believe that poor baby was suffering and you did all you could do to help him. It’s hard to process grief and guilt over loosing your cat and thinking if you could have done more. I had a cat once, my first cat, he was my best friend, he ran out of the door after 3 years (he would occasionally go out to explore but always came back) and I haven’t seen him since. I was devastated, I am still not over it 8 years later. I finally had to accept that I couldn’t find him and help him if he was in trouble. I don’t think I’ll ever be over but it’s better now after I decided to make peace with that myself and my loss of a friend. I eventually got a new cat and he reminds me of my first cat, however I don’t let him out and extra cautious! I don’t know if you tried taking cat to different vets for diagnosis I don’t know but maybe that could help next time but please don’t blame yourself, he was really sick and I know the hole it leaves when you lose a fur baby and it will take some time to heal unfortunately especially if he was really close to you.

 

[catloverfromwayback]

Hi folks,

I recently had to put my 10 year old to sleep (on my birthday) because he deteriorated so quickly. He was tested for Lympthoma via biopsy which came back with no cancerous cells found and started treatement for IBD.

It started with diarrhoea initially then came the vomiting which was 2-3 times a day. and despite the negative cancerous cells from the biopsy his vet believed this was more likely than IBD due to how much sickness was occurring.

He was receiving monthly depo, vitamin B12 injections which initially helped but the last course failed and he went downhill.

It started with him stopping drinking his water, then his pro biotic hard food and then not eating his soft food and started staying out (always was an outdoor boy) but this became constant to the point I had to go to my neighbours door in the street door to retrieve him as believed he was staying there to die.

He had lost so much weight to the point you could feel his spine when clapping him and the decision had to be made on the 26/10/2022 when I put my fur baby to sleep.

I am broken, I went through this when I was younger with my indoor cat however this has affected me and I genuinely don't know how I'll get over it.

I feel guilty and have spent a large part of my days googling and researching online (which lead me to find this forum) about whether I could have done more but my head told me he was giving up between the stress of his treatment and constant visit to the vets as well of how sick he was.

I’m so sorry. I lost my Maddie two years ago to cancer that was initially misdiagnosed as IBD. When the vets realised what it was it was too late for anything but palliative treatment - though I don’t think they could have helped her even if they had recognised it immediately. You did everything you could for your dear boy, but eventually, the only thing we can do for them is help them go, help them escape the pain.

 

[di and bob]

There is ALWAYS guilt and all those should haves, and could haves, when you lose someone so special in your life. As we get older the loss of a loved one reminds us of our own mortality and hits especially hard. You did all you could with what you had, much more than most. You couldn't let him suffer, and suffering he was. I believe he was trying to distance himself from you at the end to spare you the pain of his leaving.
The bond you forged with that precious boy over the years is a strong one. He will forever be a part of your soul, as you are with his. love is spiritual, so eternal, he will always be as close as your thoughts and prayers. You will never get over this, you somehow work through it. No one in the whole world loved that boy as you do, it is unique and known only to you and him. We can empathize because we have stood where you are now with the loss of our own sweet little ones. It hurts, it always will, but time brings a softening of the pain, time is its own healer of broken hearts.
Try not to dwell on his end, but celebrate those ten years of happiness he brought to your life. Though he now follows a new path, it will always parallel your own life's journey. It is at times like these I remember a famous verse...."do not cry because it is over, smile because it happened".......RIP dear boy, you will never be forgotten, you will always have a secure place in a loving heart. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!

 

[betsygee]

I'm so sorry. Lymphoma is an awful disease. You're right--at a certain point, the stress of the treatments and the vet visits get to be too much, and the kindest thing we can do is let them go.

It's one of the hardest decisions to make for our beloved companions, and my heart goes out to you. I hope you can find some peace in the knowledge that you made the best decision possible under the circumstances.

Rest in peace, sweet kitty.

 

[strider rose]

CaesarCat im so sorry for your loss hun

 

[CaesarCat]

Hi folks, sorry I never seen all these lovely replies until now and cannot thank everyone enough for taking time to respond.

Sharing experiences and chatting with people who understand your pain definitely helps but as a family we are still so raw.

When I’m at work I’m ok but as soon as I come home and all the things he would do and places he would be just make it hurt so much.

Thank you again to everyone’s kind words