Lost my buddy today

[EGrunt]

While searching the forums to see what the vet may have missed during our visit yesterday (9/2/20) I came across this forum. While trying to type this I find myself crying again. My buddy (Mojo) was just over 16 years old. I still remember him as a kitten back in 2004 as I retired from the Marine Corps. My wife brought him home and he immediately became my pet. I was the only one that he allowed to pet and scratch his stomach.

In early 2019 we took Mojo into the vet and we needed to change his diet and give him insulin. We went back to vet several times through out 2019 after changing his diet and giving him insulin and towards the end of 2019 the lab tests showed we could stop giving him insulin as long as we stayed with his new dietary requirements.

All was good till the end of July of 2020 when he was laying around and not eating. Back to the vet we went and blood work and tests were done and the results showed he had kidney issues. We also had dental work done. He recovered nicely throughout July and into August of 2020.

Then earlier this week (Tuesday 9/1/20) Mojo was laying around and not eating. He was not interested in food and was having a hard time walking with his back legs. Wednesday (9/2/20) we took him to the vet and he had an infection in his mouth. They injected him with fluids and gave him a injection that was would increase his appetite to eat. They gave us antibiotics to give to him for the infection.

The next morning (today 9/3/20) he had not moved from the night before. He could not stand or move on his own. When I tried to hold him up in the standing position and when I released my grasp but held onto him he fell to the carpet gently as I was still holding onto to him. He was urinating as he laid on the carpet and he just stared with a glaze in his eyes. I tired to feed him wet food through a syringe and he would not take it unless I laid him on his back on lap. He had no energy. It was like a watching the life drain from his body.

I had to make the painful decision to let him go and I contacted the vet and advised them of his condition. Mojo's condition went down hill so fast and I don't understand why. I am left questioning if I did everything possible to help my buddy. I just could not watch him lay motion less on the towel on the carpet next to me.

I wanted to share a photo of my buddy (Mojo). I love you buddy.

 

[Furballsmom]

I am left questioning if I did everything possible to help my buddy.

You did, I promise you that you did.

RIP baby Mojo, you gave it the good fight

 

[Jcatbird]

I am so sorry. Most of us here have had some experience with losing a fur buddy and , personally, I always look back and wonder if I could have done anything different. That’s just part of really loving them. As hard as I have searched, I have never found anything that I could have done to keep them longer. You did not let him continue in a way that was not good for him. That was the most loving thing you could have done. You suffered instead. He is beautiful. We give them our hearts and they give us theirs so that part stays with you always. He would not have wanted you to suffer either. Cats always want to comfort us. You gave him a home, a family, care and love and no living creature can have a better life than that. I would wish that for us all. No more pain for him. You gave him his freedom. My heart goes out to you and we will be here if you want to tell us more about him. He was obviously an important and cherished part of your world. I am very grateful that you were there for him.

 

[Mia6]

I am very sorry about Mojo...what a beautiful, handsome boy!! He is now at the
Bridge with so many of our babies and he is in good hands. I'm certain he has
already met my Vincie girl. Let the tears flow...there is always someone here
to listen

Love,
Mia

 

[SnugglesAnn]

I am so sorry. He is such a handsome kitty. I wish I could provide the answers for you, but I will say even when you think you know the answers, it just seems to be in our nature to question how and why. I recently lost my own sweet boy, Oliver, and even though I had an x-ray showing the problem, I still keep questioning everything. He had been rolling around on the floor playing at the end of July and then in August it all went downhill. So fast. And those "what ifs" always get me as well. What if I had noticed this, what if I had taken him in sooner, what if we had tried this, what if the vet was mistaken, and so on. In time though those lingering questions will lessen. But 16 years- well, you had to have been doing something right. It's never enough, I know, but try to think of all that love you shared. I don't think any of us would give up any of that love, even knowing that one day we would have to make a very painful decision. But we will see them again soon. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

 

[di and bob]

I truly think it was towards the end and would have continued until his poor little body couldn't take any more.....My Burt suffered for much longer because I could not let him go and kept trying to 'save' him, something I regret now, and am glad you didn't go through. He was 16 also.
Your sweet boy had everything he always wanted. A loving home and the care he needed. He was truly a soulmate to you and bestowed upon you a rare treasure, a cat's love. Love is spiritual, so eternal. He will be forever as close as your thoughts and prayers. Because he occupies a space within your own soul, he lives on through you now. A love like this is personal, no one in the whole world loved him as you do, and only you will suffer as you do also. But because of that love, he would want for you to go on and live your life to the fullest, seeking life's happiness and appreciating its beauty, just as you would have wanted for him if you were the first to go.
Take his love and allow it to be shared, to grow, and in this way, it maintains its eternity. Mourn for him, continue loving him. This is one of the greatest honors you can bestow on a loved one. But do not make his death more important than his life. That can never be. Use your beautiful memories to bring you comfort, as he is using his to do the same. He shared your life's journey for a little while, and though he now follows a new path, it will forever parallel your own. For you, life will go on, slowly but surely. For him, it will pass in the blink of an eye until that glorious day you are both reunited once more, Because once spirits are joined, no one, not even death can tear them apart.
My heart goes out to you. I know how much this hurts. Be gentle on yourself, and know that time is the only thing that softens the sharp edges of grief. One day at a time.......RIP beautiful Mojo with the glorious blue eyes. You will forever be missed, you will always have a secure place in loving hearts. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!

 

[les26]

You did all you could for him and more, sometimes we cannot stop the inevitable but we try and always think "I should've seen this coming" or "I should've done this and earlier" but in hindsight we see that we did all that we could when we saw that there was an issue and you certainly did, but that is how grief plays mental games with us but we slowly come to terms with our loss and that part of it goes away. You did all anyone could've done for him, it sadly was just his time to move on, and 16 years is a good lifespan for a cat although we never think any amount of time is enough. He is fine now, he thanks you for your love and caring, and you will meet again one day down the line and be reunited once again.

"Their last breath on Earth is their first breath in Heaven"

I hope that your heart heals a bit more each day, God Bless.....

 

[EGrunt]

I appreciate the kind words from everyone. Last night was hard. Over the years when I would go to bed and read my iPad before going to sleep. There was Mojo laying next me and looking at the screen. Below (second picture) is a picture from my iPad of Mojo as he is looking at it. It is currently 06:00 AM (9/4/20) and I am off from work today but I find it hard to sleep. While I type this I am drinking my coffee and Mojo would have already jumped onto my lap and insisted I pet his stomach. Mojo did this daily as he knew my routine. Every morning I would drink my coffee at my desk and read on my PC what was going on in the world and Mojo would join me. It was his daily routine and I will truly miss it and him.

 

[les26]

Oh yes, it is so so hard to deal with and accept especially in the beginning, they are part of your life as well as your routine and when it is changed it is devastating, you have a huge hole in your heart and void in your life. And we can tell that he truly was a close little buddy which makes it harder than if he was aloof or sometimes affectionate and other times not, he was more like a dog it seems and sometimes they are like that, our Simon was like that years ago and Stanley is now.

It takes time to adjust to the change and also deal with the loss and the grief and the pain, you might have many mental disturbances as the grief works it's way out and sometimes even physical ones too, but as you know it is just our mind trying to make sense to what just happened, and with time you do adjust, you never really truly get over it but you adjust and accept it.

And maybe someday down the road when the time is right you will discover another little one who needs your love and caring heart, it will make itself known to you if that is to happen when the time is right, and that will be another lucky cat like Mojo was.

 

[will2002]

Mojo was a very handsome old gentleman cat. I would guess those beautiful blue Siamese eyes would cast a spell on any human they came in contact with. He was surely a wonderful friend, and true companion!

It is always difficult to let our fur babies go. I have had to do this more times in my lifetime than I care to, or can remember! "There is a time to be born, and a time to pass", and there is just no way to get around this fact of all life on this old planet.

As time passes, and the pain and grief of your loss eases a bit, try not to cry because Mojo is gone, but smile because you had him for sixteen happy, blessed years. He was without doubt one in a million!... God bless you.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rest you gentle, Mojo, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

What a beautiful cat Mojo was, is, and always will be. Did you do everything possible for him? That's the question that we always ask, and the answer is, honestly, "Maybe." The answer that really matters is, "I did everything that my vet and I knew to do." That is the answer that matters, that is the answer that you can live with. But OH, they leave a hole in our hearts! This I can tell you, the deepest truth I know, that love never dies. It only changes form and continues on. Mojo's deep love for you is now translated and purified into Love, and remains with you still, for Love abides. Always, forever, Love abides. One day, when the grief is not so new and raw, you'll feel him there with you.

 

[Mia6]

I love the pics!! Daddy's boy, sweet angel.

 

[CatSitter86]

I am so sorry for your loss. You did everything you could and please don't think otherwise. Mojo knows you loved him and you fought for him, don't even question it.

Let yourself cry... Continue to let yourself cry, it's what helps us get through it.

He was such a handsome boy and was lucky to have you as his human. Much love.

 

[EGrunt]

I am so glad I found this forum as it has helped me through this heart grieving time. Thank you everyone for your comments they mean so much.

 

[EGrunt]

 

[Furballsmom]

I am so glad I found this forum

We are so glad you posted about him - what a cat!!

 

[EGrunt]

This weekend has been an emotional roller coaster ride for the wife and me. We purposely left the house each day to clear our minds even though we did not want to go anywhere besides the grocery store (commissary) on the base (Camp Pendleton). It was our scheduled weekly grocery trip. Even then we found ourselves crying as we drove away from the house.

I had already changed the back drop picture on PC to a picture of Mojo and the back drop screen on my iPhone. So each morning when I start my PC and drink my coffee before I start my day, I say good morning to my buddy (Mojo). The below picture is the one I am using.

I like to share with you a little history about how I became a cat owner. Growing up on the east coast (Maryland) my family breed and owned German Shepard's. I joined the United States Marine Corps in 1984 and my first duty station was Camp Pendleton in California (North San Diego County next to Oceanside). I met my wife in 1986 and we also married in 1986, we are approaching 34 years of marriage. When I met my wife she had a cat (Fleabag). Fleabag was a Tabby cat and we bonded immediately. From 1986 till present we have always had cats we have had a plethora of cats and we have had to make the decision with our vet to have them make the journey across the bridge. There names were: Fleabag, Crystal, Bud (son of Crystal), Mojo, GiGi (Mojo's sister), Tiki, Daisy, Jake (Little Man), and Tom. Tiki, Daisy, and Jake were all adopted from the animal shelter. Tom (Tabby) adopted us. Back in 2015 I was sitting down to watch TV in our living room. We have a large and wide window in our living room. Before turning on the TV I could see in the TV screen what appeared to be a small head with pointed ears looking through the window. I turned around and there was Tom. We started feeding him outside at first. I asked around the neighborhood if anyone had lost a cat and looked for signs. I went to the Humane Society and filled out the paperwork that I found Tom and they advised me if no came to them we could keep him. No one every claimed Tom and Tom adopted us.

We still have Daisy, Jake, and Tom since the passing of Mojo. Eventually we look for another cat who needs a home but not right now. I am getting misty eyed thinking of my Mojo.

Having spent 20 years in the military and my wife being part of the military with me for 18 of the 20 years. I had the conservation that I wanted her to go on with her life if anything ever happened to me. I wanted her to live life and remember the good times we had. Easier said then done especially with those that are still living. Fortunately I made it through my military career but have worked in Law Enforcement since my retirement from the military in 2004. I have had the same talk with her upon transitioning into my current job. She told me I used up my 9 lives (cat lives) with my close calls while on active duty in military. However she supported my decision on my current career path.

I have spent time reading others posts on the forum and again this forum has helped me during the grieving process. Thanks for listening. I am sure this will not be my last post.

 

[Furballsmom]

Thank you for sharing, and everything!

 

[EGrunt]

I wanted to post a picture off all of our cats (Mojo, Daisy, Jake, and Tom). Using a clock as a reference, at the 12 o'clock position is Daisy, 3 o'clock Mojo, 6 o'clock Tom, and 9 o'clock Jake. The second picture starting from top to the bottom is: Tom, Jake, and Daisy

 

[les26]

So if I read this correctly Daisy and Jake look very similar to Mojo in appearance? Sylvester looks exactly like if you combined Simon a Tuxedo and Sebastian a long haired Chantilly, looks exactly like a 50/50 blend of the two boys so he is a constant reminder that a little piece of them is still with us, hopefully having those two will provide the same small comfort to you. They are not replacements, but gentle reminders of them.