Littermates fighting after house rearranged (long)

sarah430

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I have two rescue cats that I adopted when they were 6 months old. They are now 8 years old. I'm pretty sure they are littermates and were probably born feral. They weren't aggressive when I got them but they needed a lot of socialization. Over the years they have come out of their shells and are very loving but they still have their quirks.

Navi (the girl) is still skittish at times and likes her safe spots under couches. She'll usually hide if there are strangers in the house but will come out once she's comfortable. Also hides from the vacuum cleaner, etc. She has gotten out a few times over the years due to doors accidently not closing and it has sometimes taken me weeks to get her back inside. She'll hide and won't come even to me. You can see some of my prior posts about my angst trying to get her back inside. But despite he skittishness she'll let me love all over her - I can rub her all over her face and she loves to cuddle with me. Link (the boy) is more chill. He's curious about newcomers to the house and we can take him out in the backyard for supervised outdoor time - he won't run away or hide. However he won't let you pet his head or come at him from in front. If you do he'll nip or swat. As long as you only pet from behind he's fine. He'll also "dolphin" up to your hand held over him for a pet. Very cute. He likes to cuddle too.

I would say they are bonded and usually during the day I would find them curled up together sleeping and often grooming each other. They had their moments but most of their fights were playing and rarely did it seem like a true conflict. The only time I ever heard hissing was from Link after Navi was outside for more than a week. But he only hissed a few times and then he was fine and remembered Navi again. We never had to go through the re-introduction process.

Thanks if you've read this far - my problem now is that earlier this summer I rearranged our living situation and it has set them off. I used to sleep in an upstairs room and Navi would sleep with me, with Link usually joining at some point. In the mornings they would always both sit in my lap - usually Link would come in to stake a spot. But then Navi would join and try to sit on top of him high up by my chest. He would eventually move over down on my legs or feet and never seemed to mind having to move. The move this summer involved my son coming home go live after college. I moved to a downstairs bedroom and my son is where I used to sleep. I also rearranged some of the other furniture and changed my home office. At the time I really didn't think about how this would affect them so when their behavior changed I didn't really understand why. But in hindsight I realized it was right after all the changes so I'm sure that's it. I don't suspect any health issues - they have been to the vet. There have always been cats roaming around the yard so I also don't think it's re-directed aggression.

This is what is happening - Link will hiss at Navi. Instead of Navi taking it in stride (as she did after he hissed at her after her absence) it seems to set off her feral attack instinct. She will go after him hard - with cats screaming and fur flying. A real fight. So far no blood has been drawn but this is not play fighting. Link has found a safe place that is all his that he will retreat to. I think a lot of this is centered around me. Link will claim a spot near me and hiss at Navi when she comes close. Link has started to be more attached to my husband. So instead of him trying to sit on my lap in the mornings he will go sit with my husband. The morning spot on my lap is all Navi's now. They tolerate each other a lot of the time and in fact Link will still playfully swat at Navi like he always did when she'd be too loud meowing as we are getting a meal for them together. If we play with them they will both play together and we have a game in the evening when we give them their treats together and they are fine. And I realized they are sleeping together with me at night. Navi always goes to bed with me, but I realized a month or so ago that Link was joining in the middle of the night and they cuddle together!

Thanks again for reading this far. I'm a little sad about it but I really don't care if they aren't the best of friends as long as they aren't fighting. But obviously they still like each other somehow or they wouldn't be cuddling together. I really don't want these all out fights going on. I'd say they happen maybe every other day. And I try to cut them off if I notice Link hissing. Or I try to move them if I see some territorial behaviour going on. But nothing has stopped the fighting all together. I've tried Feliway diffusers but they don't work. I would love to hear if anyone else has had the same experiences and if you have any advice. It's not all out war but the battles between them are too serious to ignore. Thank you!
 

FeebysOwner

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Hi. I think all the upheaval that has gone on in your home is/was the issue, and it seems they are starting to adapt to the changes. But, start logging when this happens - as in, what has gone on before the spats. Could your son somehow, unknowingly, be involved?
 
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sarah430

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Hi. I think all the upheaval that has gone on in your home is/was the issue, and it seems they are starting to adapt to the changes. But, start logging when this happens - as in, what has gone on before the spats. Could your son somehow, unknowingly, be involved?
Thank you! I think it may be getting better. But even last night I got up in the middle of the night and they jumped off the bed. After I came back and turned off the light I heard a hiss and realized Link was in the room and Navi was at the door wanting to come back in. So I picked him up and set him down in the living room. I don’t think my son is the issue. I think it’s me - they are very attached to me (especially Navi). There’s some jealousy and changing their territory upset the balance. Fights seem to happen if Link is somewhere Navi wants to be. For instance he can’t come to bed first but ok if he arrives later. I see him trying to establish new places he can be dominant but I’m still figuring out the patterns.
 

FeebysOwner

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But even last night I got up in the middle of the night and they jumped off the bed. After I came back and turned off the light I heard a hiss and realized Link was in the room and Navi was at the door wanting to come back in. So I picked him up and set him down in the living room.
I guess I am a bit confused about what happened. So, Link got back in the room before Navi? Why would you pick Link up and place him elsewhere? Maybe it is Navi that you should have picked up and brought back in the room, with Link already there, and then given them some treats or a bit of playtime to distract Navi from the idea she didn't get back in the room first? I don't think casting Link out of the room would be doing anything other than confirming to Navi that her behavior is OK.

It sounds like they are both vying for 'top' spot with you, and you probably need to do what you can to let both of them know that you aren't playing favorites with either.
 
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sarah430

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Yes, apparently Link came back in first. Your suggestion is a good one but not practical at 1:30am when I just want to go back to sleep. I was just trying to prevent a fight. One time I did try to bring him in first and it didn’t go well. I can see I need to be more intentional with treats and play as part of the process. I will look for ways I can include Link more and not necessarily favor Navi. Thanks FeebysOwner!
 
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