Kitty Acting Strange After Time Away

Moonlight_wolf

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Hey, I have this lovely little cat. And we have always been very close. She’s very affectionate and needy and loves being around people and purrs all the time and comes when she’s called.
She would greet me every time I came home from work or wherever I was.

But I had to go away for 5 months for medical reasons and I didn’t see her at all during those months. And my parents took care of her when I was gone. I live with my parents so it worked out pretty well.

But now I’m back and I was overjoyed to see her. And she seemed kinda confused to see me.

I thought things would go back to normal eventually but it’s been two weeks and she doesn’t greet me at the door the way she used to. She doesn’t purr when I pet her. She doesn’t come when I call her. She doesn’t get excited to see me.

She’s not mean or anything. She’s just not nearly as affectionate as she once was. And not nearly as loving to me. Right now I think she might prefer my parents to me, which hurts a lot.

We had a real bond and I’m just worried now that’s gone forever. I’m worried that she no longer loves me.

And that’s a devastating thing for me to feel.

Do you think our relationship is destroyed forever and will never go back to what it once was.

Is it possible that she forgot me? She remembers how to do her tricks, which my parents didn’t practice with her at all. So I know her memory isn’t that bad.

But the way she’s acting makes me wonder if she really did forget me
 

ArtNJ

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Look at it this way. This happens sometimes to human parents when they come back from military service. And, although mostly stupid, the one cat year = 7 human years thing is not without a grain of truth. You were gone a long time in cat terms. Your cat probably remembers you to an extent -- she isn't treating you like a total stranger, right -- but the safe thing to do is treat her like a new cat that you don't have a bond with, and act like you have to build the bond from scratch. That way, you don't do any damage by rushing a cat that isn't ready. And you might be pleasantly surprised and it doesn't take as long as it would with a new cat.

Your cat will probably never go back to all the old behaviors -- maybe some, but not all. Cats change a lot over time, and 5 months is a big snapshot of a cat's life. But you have the chance to build new ways to interact and rituals together.

Good luck.
 

Jcatbird

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I would not worry at all. Please give her time to readjust and just keep loving her. I have seen cats that were reunited with siblings or other kitty family members and at first they did not react as they had before. Now they are strongly bonded again. It’s not that she stopped loving you. :alright:It’s just going to take time. Keep practicing the tricks with her, give her the same affection and lots of love. She’ll respond.
 
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Moonlight_wolf

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Thanks guys. Yeah I’m trying to give her time and be patient. It’s just hard because we had such a bond before. And it pains me to come back and feel like it’s not the same anymore.

I really do hope she remembers me at least a little. She remembered all of her tricks perfectly (sit, lay down, roll over, high five, spin and jumping over my arm). So she does have a pretty good memory.

I just hope that she forgives me for leaving her for so long. Even though I know she was in good hands, I still feel horrible for having been gone so long.
 

FeebysOwner

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She'll come around in time, I am sure! Are you taking back the feeding/watering/litter box cleaning duties - assuming you were the one who was responsible for these things before you were gone? That will help for her to see you taking care of her needs. Also, give her treats whenever she does pay attention to you - hopefully, she doesn't come to expect them all the time!! ;)

Also, remember - depending on your medical situation - you likely smell differently to her, especially if you are on any medications you weren't taking previously.
 
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