Kitten's Death, I Don't Know What To Do, Urgent Please.

[Rhina]

Hello!

Yesterday my cat's kitten was hit by a car a few streets away and passed away. At the time I was too shocked to do anything so I let my mom handle everything, and I thought the cat already knew about it since she seemed so sad and broken. My mom took the kitten a few km away from home and put her at a tree's roots.
I kept thinking if my cat actually knew about it and today not only she wasn't home at the usual time I brought her food, mom said she even brought a mouse and waited a few hours in the backyard with it in her mouth, and besides that yesterday she waited in the same spot for a few hours after we took the kitten. From what I have seen she had a pretty close and loving relationship with her only kitten, and I don't know what to do to help her in these moments. My mom isn't really keen on the idea of bringing back the kitten, she's afraid of some illness or anything coming out of this and she doesn't want to bury the kitten in our yard, since there's a possibility that we would build there. On the other hand my cat has been through some things and doesn't trust humans so much, and aside from a few times when I put her food and she lets me pet her she stays away even from me, and it would be very difficult to take her to the kitten's eternal place without a few scars and her possible running away.
It's the first time I've been through something like this despite having had generations of cats in my family, and I really don't know what to do and it just pains me to see her like this. Should I try to show her the body somehow and give her some time with it, or just let her keep looking for her and reach the conslusion herself, which seems so cruel from my point of view. Maybe the answer seems so obvious but I really need some advice, neither me nor my mom have any idea and we're already fighting over what to do and I don't need that.

Thank you for reading all of this and please tell me what you think, I just want to help but I don't know how.

 

[Letta]

Hi, how sad
I would not show the body. Cats are not like humans they don't understand death in the same way. It helps us to say goodbye to our loved ones, cats don't have the same notions than us.
However your cat is grieving And it will be hard on her for a while. She knows her kitten is dead and she will need time, patience and love to feel better. The most important thing right now is to be there for her: be sure that she eats, that she takes care of her self and show her a lot of attention. She will need time and patience, and slowly it will get better. Here is an article on cat grief:Do Cats Mourn?
Is there a lot of cars in your neighbohood? Maybe you could try to make your cat an indoor cat? If there is a lot of traffic it is dangerous for her.

 

[kittens mom]

Some animals will either be afraid of linger around the body of a deceased companion or offspring. Usually at some point nature tells them something is wrong and they leave.
At this point your cat will hunt and search it would probably be best to keep her home for a week. Please consider spaying her so she doesn't have more kittens.
Animals do mourn the loss of their offspring and companions it's not the human sadness of death but the loss of familiar and with kittens the mothering instinct.
The mother /kitten bond is based on the smell or the smell of the nest. One person will tell you to clean everything and remove bedding they shared another will tell you to leave it for comfort. Just do what seems best for your cat.

 

[dahli6]

I had a cat who had a single kitten after a stressful pregnancy. The kitten only lived a few weeks but my cat continued to return to the last place she saw that kitten, for years. They remember and sometimes they grieve. As long as she is still eating properly I would not worry too much.
It is hard to see any friend going through loss and even harder when you can't do anything. Maybe make some extra effort to spend time outside where she can see you and she won't feel so alone. It might make you feel better too because you are experiencing grief over the same "person".

 

[Rhina]

Thank you for your kind words and advice! I'll not show her the body but I'll try my best to make sure she knows I'm there and that she's healthy when she reaches the conclusion herself. I just hope I'm doing what's best for her, if you have any advice please don't hesitate to continue the discussion.

 

[marblefox909]

I know this is unrelated but how do I make a post? My kitten ingested less than a lick of borax water and I need help but have no idea how to post a question!!!

 

[Rhina]

I know this is unrelated but how do I make a post? My kitten ingested less than a lick of borax water and I need help but have no idea how to post a question!!!

You go to the specific forum and press post new thread

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rhina I am so sorry that you and your cat lost that precious kitten. Do keep her close for awhile, until she has a chance to adjust. Other than that, just give her extra time and affection. As with any loss, having those you love and trust near, and passing time, are the only things that really help.

 

[catsknowme]

Condolences on losing the kitten. Actually, many cat rescuers allow the mom to see the body; they DO understand death, because of the smell; otherwise you risk her wandering off and searching for naught. If you dont want to do that, the next best thing is to confine her for a few weeks. If her kitten was tiny, you can try bringing her another baby; there are always plenty of kittens needing homes. And once her mourning is over, she should be spayed. She will probably go into heat soon; it is mother nature's way of preserving the species.
You say that she is not bonded to you that much so you should appeal to her more basic instincts. Canned food, fed often, outside of regular hours is a plus. Also try to engage her in play - a laser light or a teaser toy tied or taped onto the end of an old fishing rod works well - something that she can play with that you control but does not require her to be within touching range. Gradually, you can get her to come closer and closer to you while she is focused on the toy. Resist trying to touch her when she gets close; it will offend her and undo the level of trust. Cats are like ladies - we liked to be touched at our invitation only

 

[ginny]

Condolences on losing the kitten. Actually, many cat rescuers allow the mom to see the body; they DO understand death, because of the smell; otherwise you risk her wandering off and searching for naught. If you dont want to do that, the next best thing is to confine her for a few weeks. If her kitten was tiny, you can try bringing her another baby; there are always plenty of kittens needing homes. And once her mourning is over, she should be spayed. She will probably go into heat soon; it is mother nature's way of preserving the species.
You say that she is not bonded to you that much so you should appeal to her more basic instincts. Canned food, fed often, outside of regular hours is a plus. Also try to engage her in play - a laser light or a teaser toy tied or taped onto the end of an old fishing rod works well - something that she can play with that you control but does not require her to be within touching range. Gradually, you can get her to come closer and closer to you while she is focused on the toy. Resist trying to touch her when she gets close; it will offend her and undo the level of trust. Cats are like ladies - we liked to be touched at our invitation only

Couldn't agree more! I let my kitties see the ones who passed on so they wouldn't search endlessly. Not knowing where they are is much worse than knowing. They're much tougher than we give them credit and they do understand, I think. Poor mama kitty. I'm so sorry.

 

[vyger]

The cold reality of things is that it is most likely to late for you to do anything. When something dies it starts to go downhill pretty fast. The bacteria in it begin working at breaking it down to return it to the soil. Refrigeration slows the process and freezing almost stops it which is we we keep things like meat cold. If you just left the kitten on the ground in the woods it is very likely that it has already been picked up by a scavenger and it is not there anymore. If it was still there it would not really smell like a kitten to its mother anymore. It would smell dead and she would not recognize it. To do what you are talking about needs to be done within the first few hours. Your window of opportunity has passed. So you don't really need to worry about it as an option anymore. Concentrate your efforts on the mom.

 

[boney girl dad]

So very sorry for your loss of kitten. Please give mom all the attention that you can. This attention could be as simple as just sitting nearby.