Kitten isn't at all affectionate

[ezramc]

We got a female kitten when she was 5 wks old (not this young by choice). She's now 11 weeks old and doing great, but it bothers me a bit that she's not at all very affectionate. She followed me a little bit and slept in my lap when she was younger, but that was the extent of it. Now she naps on my bed but never seeks much attention. If I pet her, she might purr lightly but will never ask to be pet or lean in closer. The only affection she shows is occasionally chomping on or licking my nose. Otherwise, I feel like I have to bribe her with treats to be interested in me.

I don't think I bother her by seeking her out too much as I give her space. She just seems to be okay with all the space in the world.

Is this normal? Is there any way to predict how she will be in the future? I'd really lile her to be affectionate. Here's a pic of her too

 

[jefferd18]

She is beautiful!

What you perceive as lack of affection may just be your kitten being focused on something. She is young and will go through many stages including the "aloof stage".

My advice would be to play with her and interact with her as much as possible but please don't force her to be affectionate.

 

[1 bruce 1]

She's a beauty.
Is she playful and eating and drinking well, using her box OK?
When she's very sleepy (kittens sleep deep, so there's usually a point where you can pick them up and move them without waking them), I'd use this as the time to hold her and cuddle her and get her used to it. She might be a "polite" kitten in that she doesn't seek out attention and doesn't demand your time. Picture a little kid running and yelling and tugging on Mom's skirt when they want attention, vs. the quiet kid who will passively wait their turn. Some cats and kittens like being held in your arms, and some prefer to just settle down on your lap. See which you think she prefers.
I'd play with her as much as you can, and make sure you spend time petting her, gently handling her paws, her tail, etc. One she learns human hands are very good to her you'll maybe be back, asking for help in how to get her to stop begging you to sit in your lap

 

[Azazel]

Cats all have their own personalities. She may change as she grows older, but the beauty of cats is that you never know what you will get. Accepting that they all have different ways of showing affection is just part of being a cat parent. One thing's for sure, we can't force them to show affection in the way we want, we just have to let them be who they are.

 

[Lalka]

Is she your first cat and is there other ppl taking care of her? She look Himalayan...is she from a shelter or a breeder? Did you declawed her?

Some cats love their parent but will only enjoy sitting on the sofa without touching them. It is kinda unusual for a kitten tho...they like to play, climb on your pants and their tiny claws hurt so much

No way to predict the future, but she could stay a distant, quiet cat and its ok. My cats love me too much and its annoying sometimes :x

 

[neely]

Congrats on your new female kitten - she is absolutely adorable.

It can take time and patience to form a loving relationship with a cat. Here is an Article about the signs that shows your cat loves you:

23 Signs That Your Cat Loves You - TheCatSite

Wondering how cats show affection? We've put together a quick list of all the wonderful ways in which cats show us that they love us!

thecatsite.com

And, as other members suggested, all cats have individual personalities: Cats As Individuals

Please keep us updated with pics and your progress. Best of luck!

 

[Lalka]

It can be more complicated than signs of love. I saved a 5 months old kitten 4 years ago (my SO adopted her, i already had my 2 babies). She is mean and do attack us if we don't let her go outside or if we pet her for more than 1 minute. When i lay down on the sofa, she come and sleep on top of my tummy and purr...i massage her back for 30 sec and stop , its enough and i know she love me, she will stay there till i move.

 

[Neko-chan's mama]

My kitten went through a phase where all she wanted was play time and space. She actually became more affectionate after being spayed at 20 weeks.

 

[danteshuman]

Part of it might be her age (she is currently a hyper play driven minion) & part of it may be her personality & or hypersensitivity. It may help to adopt a cuddle bug kitten of 4-6 months or to rethink how you view affection.

My mom adopted two kittens I raised at her place and I adopted their brother. The girl my mom planned on adopting from the beginning is long haired and stand offish about cuddles. We think she overheats and gets hypersensitive from to much petting. She has always been that way. She does ask for nightly pre-bedtime cuddles from my mom, hangs out near/on us a lot (if we don’t pet her) & comes when she is called. She has always been kinda stand offish about cuddles while her brothers were cuddle bugs! My mom gets plenty of cuddles from her brother. Cami will sleep on my lap for hours if I don’t pet her beyond the initial hello chin scratch.

I think in your case it is her age since she used to be more cuddly. Dante was s hyper terror as a wee baby kitten. I used to to lure him into my lap using wand toys, give him a quick pet for a second then keep playing with him.

Dante was a complete lap cat his entire life! How? Whenever a cat gets on my lap I give them at least 15 minutes before I get up & only pet them if they seek/want it (pay close attention to cat body language.) I used the same lap at rules on the three minions/kittens I raised. All three teen kitties will sleep on my lap for an hour or two & all three want to be around me. I suggest you try it. * all the kitties know if I put a blanket on my lap they will get my lap for about an hour, so they come running when I drape a lap blanket over my lap.

 

[SDerailed]

My Salem wasnt affectionate AT ALL. He just wanted to play and that was it. Once he was around 8 months old he became a but more affectionate. At 1.5 years old he is the biggest moosh baby ever. Your kitten is going to change a lot in the next year.

 

[1 bruce 1]

My Salem wasnt affectionate AT ALL. He just wanted to play and that was it. Once he was around 8 months old he became a but more affectionate. At 1.5 years old he is the biggest moosh baby ever. Your kitten is going to change a lot in the next year.

Queen Bee was aloof for 5-6 years. When I caught her at the right moment, picked her up and let her relax and talked to her and watched those paws knead on my arm, it created a "monster attention hog" who is always at my side. Try and shoo her away, and she takes 3 steps, then flops to her side then continues to talk. I wouldn't have it any other way

 

[Nazneen123]

Give it some time and she'll come around

In the meantime keep playing with her, show her as much love affection

Give her time

Variety of toys

Treats!

Spoil her lol

And she'll show you love back