Our beautiful 3 and a half year old girl is no longer with us. We gave her the gift of a peaceful goodbye after a month long battle with suspected FIP.
Is it normal to feel this guilty? We took her to the vet so many times, had all the tests we could get, and gave her the best care possible. In the end, I truly don't know if it was FIP or not. My vet wasn't really there for me, and wouldn't give me definitive answers. In fact, we spoke to two. What I do know, is that Kei's health deteriorated like I've never seen, despite our efforts to help her. She presented with ascites a month before she passed, and honestly, I think she had dry FIP before that. We took her in in February and gave her anti nausea, fluids, and antibiotics for vomiting and weight loss. She seemed to get better...then the ascites showed up. We brought her in and the vet brushed it off. I will regret this for my whole life.
A week after he brushed it off, I said no...something is wrong. Surely enough, I brought her in again and it was clear she was dying. We attempted other treatments starting last Thursday but by Saturday, she was completely done. No drinking, no eating, not moving (even to go to the bathroom - I took her).
I have regrets. Should we have brought her to another vet? Should we have tried to get the black market drug (that honestly we didn't even know existed until her last days)? I feel like I have entirely failed as a pet mom, and I would give up so much to have many more days with her.
I also feel so guilty because we got a kitten last year. If we hadn't got this kitten, quite likely that Kei would still be with us. I didn't know about this disease...it makes me feel like an awful person.
Is it normal to feel this guilty? We took her to the vet so many times, had all the tests we could get, and gave her the best care possible. In the end, I truly don't know if it was FIP or not. My vet wasn't really there for me, and wouldn't give me definitive answers. In fact, we spoke to two. What I do know, is that Kei's health deteriorated like I've never seen, despite our efforts to help her. She presented with ascites a month before she passed, and honestly, I think she had dry FIP before that. We took her in in February and gave her anti nausea, fluids, and antibiotics for vomiting and weight loss. She seemed to get better...then the ascites showed up. We brought her in and the vet brushed it off. I will regret this for my whole life.
A week after he brushed it off, I said no...something is wrong. Surely enough, I brought her in again and it was clear she was dying. We attempted other treatments starting last Thursday but by Saturday, she was completely done. No drinking, no eating, not moving (even to go to the bathroom - I took her).
I have regrets. Should we have brought her to another vet? Should we have tried to get the black market drug (that honestly we didn't even know existed until her last days)? I feel like I have entirely failed as a pet mom, and I would give up so much to have many more days with her.
I also feel so guilty because we got a kitten last year. If we hadn't got this kitten, quite likely that Kei would still be with us. I didn't know about this disease...it makes me feel like an awful person.