Is my large cat hurting my small cat? Thank you for the help.

ssmith571

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Both of my cats are fixed, vaccinated, well fed, spoiled, and seem happy. I have had both of them since they were three months old.

My male cat is a 1 year old siamese. He’s much bigger than the female.

My female cat is a 2 years old tabby. She’s pretty small for an adult cat.

When they play the small female will hiss, growl, and run away. The large male will chase after her, and then I will hear more hissing.

The male is usually the aggressor, and I never hear him hissing or growling.

They sleep together, and groom each other multiple times per day.

How can I tell if my male cat is being too rough with the smaller female?

Is it normal to hear hissing & growling?
 

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cmshap

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Both of my cats are fixed, vaccinated, well fed, spoiled, and seem happy. I have had both of them since they were three months old.

My male cat is a 1 year old siamese. He’s much bigger than the female.

My female cat is a 2 years old tabby. She’s pretty small for an adult cat.

When they play the small female will hiss, growl, and run away. The large male will chase after her, and then I will hear more hissing.

The male is usually the aggressor, and I never hear him hissing or growling.

They sleep together, and groom each other multiple times per day.

How can I tell if my male cat is being too rough with the smaller female?

Is it normal to hear hissing & growling?
I am like the complete opposite of a cat expert, but if there's anything I learned about cats intermingling, hissing is normal.

The allogrooming aspect is a huge positive sign.

If there has been no actual physical injury I wouldn't worry about it, and let this play out into a stable functional relationship.

As always, I say "I am no vet." Don't take my words as advice. Just my two cents.
 
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ssmith571

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I am like the complete opposite of a cat expert, but if there's anything I learned about cats intermingling, hissing is normal.

The allogrooming aspect is a huge positive sign.

If there has been no actual physical injury I wouldn't worry about it, and let this play out into a stable functional relationship.

As always, I say "I am no vet." Don't take my words as advice. Just my two cents.
Thank You, and I really appreciate your response! I want my cats to be as happy as possible. It’s nice hearing other people’s opinions.
 

susanm9006

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If they are sleeping together and grooming one another, they are friends. Yes, he annoys her when he plays but if he was actually hurting her or making her afraid of him, she would hide and never get close to him. So I wouldn’t worry about them, but if the sound of their play starts to annoy you, distract them with some wand play or a treat.
 

cmshap

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If they are sleeping together and grooming one another, they are friends. Yes, he annoys her when he plays but if he was actually hurting her or making her afraid of him, she would hide and never get close to him. So I wouldn’t worry about them, but if the sound of their play starts to annoy you, distract them with some wand play or a treat.
That's another important point.

#1 I'd watch for physical injuries, or clumps of hair, etc. as has been mentioned.

#2 would be if one cat starts hiding and/or avoiding the other.

If they sleep together and groom each other, they have the kind of relationship like my brother and I when we were growing up. We fought a lot, but loved each other.
 
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ssmith571

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The fur doesn’t fly, and there are no obvious injuries. I think my female cat is is overly dramatic.
 

maggie101

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My cat Maggie is a big cat in size,slender. Peaches is small 7 pds. She does not like a big cat,Maggie,chasing after her so she hisses and growls. Peaches did bite her once and Maggie was given antibiotics incase of infection. They are now 9 and 10 yrs old so it's alot less growling. I did clicker train Maggie to come when called. Also be sure your female cat can jump above the male and no hiding spots so she's trapped
 

KittenAppliance

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My sibling cats have a serious size discrepancy as well.. one is 7 lbs, the other is 13 lbs. The smaller one hisses and growls sometimes at her brother, but i think it is because that's the only way for her to communicate to her brother to knock it off if he is being too rough, since she is so little. He usually backs off a little when that happens so he tends to get the hint. As long as the bigger cat respects her cues, there probably wont be any injuries.
 

ArtNJ

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I've found that cats hold grudges if they are actually being hurt so I believe that what is going on in these big cat small cat situations is more akin to the discomfort of a head noogie. The smaller cats dont like it in the moment, its not comfortable and they make protest noises and seek to disengage, but it does no lasting harm. When you see the smaller cat act like all is well a few minutes after rough play stops, you can therefore be comfortable that everything is ok. Sometimes the smaller cats even initiate play sometimes -- its the opposite of a grudge.
 

cmshap

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All good advice in this thread.

I only have one cat but have friends with a similar cat situation. They aren't different in size, but hiss at each other all the time when playing. And mainly because they have slightly different activity schedules. So they both instigate play at a time when the other just isn't in the mood.

They do start playing but are both standoffish at first.
 
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ssmith571

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My cat Maggie is a big cat in size,slender. Peaches is small 7 pds. She does not like a big cat,Maggie,chasing after her so she hisses and growls. Peaches did bite her once and Maggie was given antibiotics incase of infection. They are now 9 and 10 yrs old so it's alot less growling. I did clicker train Maggie to come when called. Also be sure your female cat can jump above the male and no hiding spots so she's trapped
My smaller cat is faster & more agile than the larger male. She can run circles around him. My place is full of cat trees, shelves, desks, and counters. As soon as she gets the high ground she’s safe.

I already have a clicker. I’m going to start researching training procedures.
THANK YOU
 
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