Is my Kitten too Clingy?

[muffin_of_doom]

Hi y’all,

So I’m not sure how clingy kittens are supposed to be, I had a kitten when I was 15 which was way younger – like around a month old – then Hei Wong – who is around 5-6 months old – and tbh I don’t remember my old kitten being this attached. It’s been around three weeks since I got Hei Wong from the shelter and he’s following me around the house, meowing a lot when I “return”/show up, when I enter my bedroom – I have a no pets allowed in the bedroom policy – he’ll sit outside my room for a half hour (and the same goes for when I use the bathroom or go to the basement, which is not kitty proof). When I’m cooking in the kitchen he’ll “hover” nearby around me, and the same thing goes for when I watch TV or do anything else. He’ll meow until he gets my attention then he “hovers”. Iirc my first kitten used to explore the house, like after the first clingy few days she started exploring the house and was generally occupied with doing her own thing, which is not the case for Hei Wong.
At first I was a bit touched, but after a few weeks of this I’m starting to get a bit exhausted because I’m constantly feeling pressure to play with him and keep him entertained. I want to provide him with a happy and healthy environment but when he follows me around like this I feel like he is bored with all the toys and stuff I brought him. Plus I feel like I have no time left for myself anymore (thankfully for the cat I’ve been furloughed and spend all my time at home). Anyways, is it just me or is my kitten too clingy? I’m a big softy for cute things so maybe it’s all just in my head. What should I do?
Thanks in advance.

 

[damselfly7]

OMG I see myself in post! I pretty much have the same cat. 6 months, follows me everywhere, doesn’t sleep in my room but will cry and howl outside the door ( he’s now learnt to open my bedroom door out of desperation), follows me to the bathroom ( has tried to get in the shower, tried to get in the toilet while I was using it), and will grab my hands/ arm/ skin/ leg if I don’t play with him when he wants. I also can’t lie down, read a book, or sleep when he’s on the bed because he sees me as fair game and will play attack me to start a game ( he tries to cat wrestle me). I also feel like I have no time to myself and am exhausted from trying to keep up with him. I work from home, and study part time so am always home - needless to say we don’t get much time apart. He will go and sit in the living room during the day to sleep, but always strategically placed so he can still see and hear me from where he is in the next room- I can’t go to kitchen without being followed, and cries for treats and human food when I serve myself food. I have watched Jackson Galaxy on YouTube, read numerous articles and am implementing as much play as I can, as well leaving them room when he gets physical with claws and teeth, but nothing seems to be working. He just gets more worked up, and the more o play with him the more he wants. He’s not allow rest to sleep with me as he is a little land- shark under the covers and scratches very badly, but night time is a bit of a battle as I have to get him out of the room and he doesn’t want to. He is a super sweet boy when relaxed and I love him to pieces, but the clinginess has got to stop.

Would love to hear what you have tried/ are thinking of trying for your cat

 

[ArtNJ]

Many solo kittens get this way, especially if their caregiver has a generous amount of time for them. It will fade some in time, but if you continue to have time for your cat and encourage affection, you may still have a cat that is a bit too loving at times. My advice would be to find ways to allow the cat to be close without driving you nuts. A basket on the computer desk. A scratching post they can sit on top on near your arm chair. That sort of thing. My five year old cat isn't that heavy but has the length of a Maine Coon with a large tail. He still love loves the lap, loves kneeding, and its still a lot too much sometimes. My younger cat (about a year) still follows sometimes, and still chirps for attention (we named her Pip, short for Pip Squeaker), especially if I go to my bedroom. Since she isn't a lap cat, sometimes I just give her a few pets and ignore the chirps, but where its convenient, like on the bed, I give her more attention. So she still runs when I go to the bedroom. But if you shut them down to hard, then when you are looking for that affection and bond, it may not be there. Its not a radio dial you can turn up or down exactly. Just take the space you need, but try to find ways to do that and still be loving to the cat.

 

[klunick]

My 4 month old kittens are clingy too but since they are the first cats I've ever had that liked me best, I am loving it!! I know it won't last and they will ignore me soon enough so I'm soaking in all the love when I can get it.

 

[damselfly7]

Many solo kittens get this way, especially if their caregiver has a generous amount of time for them. It will fade some in time, but if you continue to have time for your cat and encourage affection, you may still have a cat that is a bit too loving at times. My advice would be to find ways to allow the cat to be close without driving you nuts. A basket on the computer desk. A scratching post they can sit on top on near your arm chair. That sort of thing. My five year old cat isn't that heavy but has the length of a Maine Coon with a large tail. He still love loves the lap, loves kneeding, and its still a lot too much sometimes. My younger cat (about a year) still follows sometimes, and still chirps for attention (we named her Pip, short for Pip Squeaker), especially if I go to my bedroom. Since she isn't a lap cat, sometimes I just give her a few pets and ignore the chirps, but where its convenient, like on the bed, I give her more attention. So she still runs when I go to the bedroom. But if you shut them down to hard, then when you are looking for that affection and bond, it may not be there. Its not a radio dial you can turn up or down exactly. Just take the space you need, but try to find ways to do that and still be loving to the cat.

I think I have way too much time for my cat! He scopes me out, and when he sees I’m not busy, takes it as that time is for him. Our play sessions can easily go up to the hour mark, which I feel I have to give him just so I can get some peace and quiet. Otherwise he just zooms around or pounces on me, claws out, to force me to play with him. Despite my frustrations with him, I feel that we have a good bond, which is still developing, as he’s only been with me shy of a month. I do use ‘the tone’ with him when he’s being naughty ( like when he’s attempting to chew my laptop charger) but feel like I need to set boundaries otherwise he will just do what he feels like. Despite being a sweetie who loves kisses and cuddles, lots of pets, and being picked up, he is very confident, bordering on ‘pushy’. If I don’t put my foot down and modify his behavior, I am nervous I will end up with a cat who thinks he’s the boss of me, and will bite, scratch, and force himself into my personal space to get what he wants all the time.

 

[klunick]

I think I have way too much time for my cat! He scopes me out, and when he sees I’m not busy, takes it as that time is for him. Our play sessions can easily go up to the hour mark, which I feel I have to give him just so I can get some peace and quiet. Otherwise he just zooms around or pounces on me, claws out, to force me to play with him. Despite my frustrations with him, I feel that we have a good bond, which is still developing, as he’s only been with me shy of a month. I do use ‘the tone’ with him when he’s being naughty ( like when he’s attempting to chew my laptop charger) but feel like I need to set boundaries otherwise he will just do what he feels like. Despite being a sweetie who loves kisses and cuddles, lots of pets, and being picked up, he is very confident, bordering on ‘pushy’. If I don’t put my foot down and modify his behavior, I am nervous I will end up with a cat who thinks he’s the boss of me, and will bite, scratch, and force himself into my personal space to get what he wants all the time.

I can't sit down or Gracie comes and jumps in my lap and lays down to go to sleep. I have to constantly move her off to get up.

 

[molly92]

Immediately I thought, "get another kitten!"

I know that seems daunting. And it is double the food, double the litter, and double the vet bills that you have to provide for. But....if you're in a position to do so, I think you and your kitten will be a lot happier with another one! Kittens are so social. It's possible for a kitten to prefer being an only cat, but it is not at all common. My sister recently adopted her first pets-a pair of kitten sisters. She didn't originally intend to start with two, but she was asked to foster them and she told me she can't imagine how a kitten would cope being on its own, seeing how much they play together and rely on each other. They still love her and love to snuggle and play with her, but they also make their own fun with each other, which works very well because, like most people, she has to sleep sometimes! The only thing that can really match a kitten's playful energy is another kitten.

Another really great benefit to 2 kittens growing up together is that they learn what's an appropriate level of force to use while roughhousing and what hurts. Adult cats that have a tendency to bite really hard when playing often didn't grow up with other cats that were able to teach them what it felt like.

In the meantime, try to keep things interesting for your kitten. Only put out some of his toys at a time, and rotate them out every once in a while to keep things exciting. Try different treats and foods with different textures. Grow some cat grass, experiment with catnip, look into some puzzle toys, and try changing up the arrangement of any cat furniture you have. Kittens tend to be very interested in "new" experiences--their brains are still growing and learning! You can even do things like separate his food into multiple bowls and place the bowls on different surfaces every day so he has to "hunt" for his meal! Depending on how smart the cat is, you can get pretty creative. All that won't be quite the same as getting another kitten, but hopefully some of it will encourage your kitten to take a bit more interest in his surroundings instead of just watching you all the time.

 

[klunick]

Boone and Gracie have hit a new level of clingy this morning. Gracie jumped up and tried to lay down on my lap while I was sitting on the toilet while Boone laid on the bath mat beside my feet. I swear they don't understand anything about privacy.