is a smackdown inevitable?

[mystik spiral]

Sorry to start another introduction thread, I just want to be sure people see it so I can get some input.

It's been about a week since Holland and Daymon have been personally introduced. I still separate them when I am not home. Short version of my personalities:

Holland - only cat for a little over 3 years (since she was about 5 months old). No interactions with cats since I've adopted her. Very much a spoiled princess. Never much of an interactive player... I can sometimes get her going pretty good with Da Bird, otherwise it's small bursts of playtime. I'm hoping that she and Daymon will eventually play together.

Daymon - 4 years old, brought to the shelter as a lost and found, but has clearly been around people and cats. Total cool dude. When Holland hisses at him, he either ignores her or goes and sits under my bed. Just started playing interactively with me last night. So far loves Da Bird and the fleece wand.

They are both lap cats when they want to be, but Holland will give me quite a look when Daymon is sitting on my lap. It's probably me interpreting cat behavior as human behavior, but it seems like Holland gets especially hissy when Daymon is playing with something of "hers" or using "her" scratching post or condo, etc. Right now, other than his bed, his fleece blanket, and his litter pan, Daymon doesn't have anything new that didn't "belong" to Holland at some point.

Holland has gotten progressively more... something with Daymon. I don't want to say aggressive, because it's not that. Not really confrontational... maybe interactive? She used to stay as far away from him as possible and would only hiss when he got too close. Now she is following him around, and occasionally hissing at him. She isn't chasing him, exactly, and she isn't making moves to try to wrestle or bite him or anything. And it's not stalking, just... following. Daymon, bless him, is unaffected by her bossiness most of the time. He seems to understand that she is the alpha of the house, and has not shown ANY aggressiveness to her, whatsoever.

I've never introduced cats before, and I'm just curious - are they eventually going to have to have a physical interaction to cement the pecking order? At what point can I feel comfortable leaving them alone together? Oh - maybe I should mention that they both have all their claws, and while Daymon has teeth, Holland has had all of hers pulled. Right now when she hisses at him, I speak to her in a soothing voice, telling her it's OK... maybe I just want to ignore them when they're interacting and let them work it out? Since they first met face to face I've had a spray bottle at the ready for an emergency, but I haven't had to use it.

I'm just not sure what's "normal"...

TIA for any advice!

ETA: OK, now she IS chasing him... sorry for the poor light, I just took this a few minutes ago.

Part of me is happy that she's not being timid about this whole thing (she is a timid girl), but poor Daymon isn't doing anything... 

And now:

I just feel like I have NO idea what I'm doing!!

 

[carolina]

IMHO there is nothing that needs to be done.... they are just fine and will be just fine..... Things sound quite alright overthere, and I would just get on with life and ignore it......
She will provoke him, and sometimes they will go at each other...... but there is a lot of playing in that too - my cats do that all the time - they run into onto the other, give a slap and run on the opposite direction :lol3: Sometimes, there are hisses when one gets startled, and they do play catch and fight....
You will soon learn how to recognize anger, stalking....
Watch her tail - if it is up..... she is fine..... it's play..... The ears can go back sometimes when the play is too rough, and hissing too sometimes. Usually they figure it out on their own, and you kind of need to let them do that :nod:
If she puts her tail down by the floor, starts growling with her ears back... circling him.......... then you need to watch out because she is getting ready to attack.
For what you described though, they seem to be just fine....

 

[ichini]

I think they really need more time. You can't expect a cat who has been your only cat, used to have your full undivided attention (not literally, but as far as kitty attention went, all of it was hers)

You need to have time set aside where you are interacting with both of them and eventually she will come around, maybe not to the extent at which you want, where they are cuddle buddies, but they will tolerate each other, and not mind being around each other. 

Edit: And also, the "aggressiveness" if she's not actually hurting him, it may just be her playing. 

 

[mystik spiral]

She will provoke him, and sometimes they will go at each other...... but there is a lot of playing in that too
For what you described though, they seem to be just fine....

Thank you Carolina, that's what I was wondering.

Edit: And also, the "aggressiveness" if she's not actually hurting him, it may just be her playing. 

Thank you.

They are doing pretty good still. Daymon must be getting comfortable in his home because his playfulness is coming out. He loves Da Bird, of course. He's also started to tease his sister...

He will creep up behind Holland quietly, and when she finally senses (or smells) him, she turns around and hisses, and he bounces off (he does that kitten sideways bouncy thing a lot - so cute). They are just adorable.

 

[sneakymom]

Just give them time, they'll both come around. 

And who knows- they may become good friends. 

Holly will "head butt" Jasper. And then Jasper grooms her. 

And that just makes me think of Donkey and Puss from Shrek.  His line "Excuse me Donkey- but may I borrow your toungue?".