Introduction started okay then went bad

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The gate blocks the TV room, Buddy's room and bathroom from the rest of the house. When things were going better we would let Buddy out so he could explore these areas without seeing the rest of the house if that makes sense. I let him out this morning as Frankie was out of the house so no chance of him peeking around the blanket. Do you think it's okay to continue this site swapping when Frankie is out of the house?
Whenever Frankie is around the door for longer than a few seconds I'll entice him away with some catnip or treat and lots of pets. I'm glad these ups and downs are normal! I will keep you posted in a few days
 

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The gate blocks the TV room, Buddy's room and bathroom from the rest of the house. When things were going better we would let Buddy out so he could explore these areas without seeing the rest of the house if that makes sense. I let him out this morning as Frankie was out of the house so no chance of him peeking around the blanket. Do you think it's okay to continue this site swapping when Frankie is out of the house?
Whenever Frankie is around the door for longer than a few seconds I'll entice him away with some catnip or treat and lots of pets. I'm glad these ups and downs are normal! I will keep you posted in a few days
"The gate blocks the TV room, Buddy's room and bathroom from the rest of the house." - Ok, good.

" When things were going better we would let Buddy out so he could explore these areas without seeing the rest of the house if that makes sense." - Yes, makes sense. There was something voer the gate to block his view of the other parts of the house?

"I let him out this morning as Frankie was out of the house so no chance of him peeking around the blanket." - Ok

" Do you think it's okay to continue this site swapping when Frankie is out of the house?" - As long as they both do ok with it (act normal) then yes. IF they act "different" then we would want to take it slower.

"Whenever Frankie is around the door for longer than a few seconds I'll entice him away with some catnip or treat and lots of pets." - Great

" I'm glad these ups and downs are normal!" - Yes, VERY normal.

"I will keep you posted in a few days " - Great

I did have a question about Buddy's going outside of the litter box. Was it only next to the box? Or was it happening elsewhere? Cats go outside of the litter box due to Medical issues (infection, pain, paw problems, etc) or Behavioral (territorial insecurity, stress, dislike of the litter or the box - closed vs open, etc). So just want to explore that more. As we get more evidence we will get more understanding.

Keep me up on how things are going. Hopefully we can start feeding on each side of a closed door fairly soon.:) Keep up the great work!!
 
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Regarding Buddy's litter habits, he does his poops in the litter box with no problems and does normal pee in the litter box every day but when he sprays he will stand in the litter box at the end with his tail straight up and pee/spray out behind him so it goes over the litter box. I caught him doing it once so know how it works. I've invested in a case of dog pee pads at Costco to put around to save the surrounding area. I saw when I got home last night that he had done it again....this would have been after he was out in the morning so it seems he didn't do it when he was confined to the room but then did after being out and smelling Frankie around. I'm assuming it's just territorial spraying.
That being said, I haven't had him to the vet yet as was hoping to wait until he's more settled. He seems fine otherwise but I know how good cats can be at hiding issues.
Thanks for all your great input and I will keep you posted
 

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Regarding Buddy's litter habits, he does his poops in the litter box with no problems and does normal pee in the litter box every day but when he sprays he will stand in the litter box at the end with his tail straight up and pee/spray out behind him so it goes over the litter box. I caught him doing it once so know how it works. I've invested in a case of dog pee pads at Costco to put around to save the surrounding area. I saw when I got home last night that he had done it again....this would have been after he was out in the morning so it seems he didn't do it when he was confined to the room but then did after being out and smelling Frankie around. I'm assuming it's just territorial spraying.
That being said, I haven't had him to the vet yet as was hoping to wait until he's more settled. He seems fine otherwise but I know how good cats can be at hiding issues.
Thanks for all your great input and I will keep you posted
"Regarding Buddy's litter habits, he does his poops in the litter box with no problems" - Ok, good.

" and does normal pee in the litter box every day " - Good

"but when he sprays he will stand in the litter box at the end with his tail straight up and pee/spray out behind him so it goes over the litter box. I caught him doing it once so know how it works. " - Ok, so he is in the box. So he is trying t cover the whole box? Is he hitting the wall as well?

"I've invested in a case of dog pee pads at Costco to put around to save the surrounding area. " - Yes, great idea.

"I saw when I got home last night that he had done it again....this would have been after he was out in the morning so it seems he didn't do it when he was confined to the room but then did after being out and smelling Frankie around. I'm assuming it's just territorial spraying." - :/ Ok. Yes, it does seem territorial. Given that let's just leave him to his room for now.

"That being said, I haven't had him to the vet yet as was hoping to wait until he's more settled. He seems fine otherwise but I know how good cats can be at hiding issues." - Yes and he is older. BUT my sense is it is territorial. Let's see if getting him stabilized in his room will help eliminate that. So try to keep Frankie away from the door and no visual whatsoever or site swapping. Just give Buddy love, attention, if you can play with him in his room that would be great.

Now, the other thing it could be and something we need to watch is if he feels like territory was taken away (when he had to go back in his room) and therefore it made him feel insecure and he sprayed to express himself and relieve the stress. Did he go back into his room easily, happily from the rest of the house or was it a bit difficult to get him back in? Did he walk in on his own or did you have to pick him up? How did he act after he was back in his room?

We can revisit a vet visit if needed.

"Thanks for all your great input and I will keep you posted" - You are welcome. We'll figure it out. I want to stop the spraying/peeing then deal with the intro.

Hang in there. Let me know if you have any questions.
 
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"but when he sprays he will stand in the litter box at the end with his tail straight up and pee/spray out behind him so it goes over the litter box. I caught him doing it once so know how it works. " - Ok, so he is in the box. So he is trying t cover the whole box? Is he hitting the wall as well?
The box is in a corner so he puts his hind end facing the one wall, standing in the box at the end so the spray basically hits the side of the litter box and onto the floor and sometimes a bit on the wall. I've got the pee pads taped up the wall...it's quite the production :)

Now, the other thing it could be and something we need to watch is if he feels like territory was taken away (when he had to go back in his room) and therefore it made him feel insecure and he sprayed to express himself and relieve the stress. Did he go back into his room easily, happily from the rest of the house or was it a bit difficult to get him back in? Did he walk in on his own or did you have to pick him up? How did he act after he was back in his room? - He went back into his room on his own and lied on his comforter, didn't have to put him in there. I then went and gave him some Temptations and attention and he seemed calm.
talk soon!
 

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The box is in a corner so he puts his hind end facing the one wall, standing in the box at the end so the spray basically hits the side of the litter box and onto the floor and sometimes a bit on the wall. I've got the pee pads taped up the wall...it's quite the production :)


talk soon!
"The box is in a corner so he puts his hind end facing the one wall, standing in the box at the end so the spray basically hits the side of the litter box and onto the floor and sometimes a bit on the wall." - Ok. This is actually fairly common. It is not always territorial. :/ Hmmmmmmmmm

" I've got the pee pads taped up the wall...it's quite the production :) " - Yes, many people have to do that. :/

"He went back into his room on his own and lied on his comforter, didn't have to put him in there." - Ok, that is good.

" I then went and gave him some Temptations and attention and he seemed calm." - Ok, good.

Do you think it could have happened after Frankie came back in and he heard him?
 
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Do you think it could have happened after Frankie came back in and he heard him?
I can't say, I had gone to work so not sure when it happened. The gate was closed so Frankie wouldn't have been able to hang out right outside the door but could have been on the other side of the gate so about 2 feet away.
 

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I can't say, I had gone to work so not sure when it happened. The gate was closed so Frankie wouldn't have been able to hang out right outside the door but could have been on the other side of the gate so about 2 feet away.
Ok. Let's see how he/they do over the next few days.
 
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Good morning, hope you had a good long weekend! Things are going pretty well with Buddy and Frankie, both seem more relaxed overall.
Buddy has been really wanting out of his room, particularly in the mornings. He will come out for 5-10 minutes and then go back in on his own. I was going to be happy to report no spraying/peeing around the litter box as he didn't do it for 3 days straight but then he did it yesterday. Not sure what the trigger was, he had been out prior so maybe just smelling Frankie around. We got him a cat tree so he can sit and look out the window...of course he wants nothing to do with it but he now jumps up on the window ledge and looks out which he wouldn't do before. Overall he seems relaxed/settled.
Frankie seems more relaxed as well. He will still go over and sniff at Buddy's door but doesn't hang around. One day he sniffed around the TV room after Buddy was in there, this was on Friday, he just sniffed around the couch and then he came and lied down on the couch. The other nights he didn't do any extra sniffing just jumped up on the couch where he usually sits. Buddy sits in this same spot when he comes out, neither of them seem to take notice of smelling each other on the couch. It's right beside where I sit so may be why they come there.
When Frankie is sniffing at Buddy's door, neither of them gets obviously stressed. Buddy will look over or even sometimes get closer to the door but doesn't get his hackles up or anything. Frankie will just flatten down, trying to see under which he can't and will then move on to more interesting pursuits. So I feel like things are going well.
Will continue the no visual and continue to monitor. Hoping Buddy's peeing/spraying around the litter box will continue to diminish this week.
 

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Good morning, hope you had a good long weekend! Things are going pretty well with Buddy and Frankie, both seem more relaxed overall.
Buddy has been really wanting out of his room, particularly in the mornings. He will come out for 5-10 minutes and then go back in on his own. I was going to be happy to report no spraying/peeing around the litter box as he didn't do it for 3 days straight but then he did it yesterday. Not sure what the trigger was, he had been out prior so maybe just smelling Frankie around. We got him a cat tree so he can sit and look out the window...of course he wants nothing to do with it but he now jumps up on the window ledge and looks out which he wouldn't do before. Overall he seems relaxed/settled.
Frankie seems more relaxed as well. He will still go over and sniff at Buddy's door but doesn't hang around. One day he sniffed around the TV room after Buddy was in there, this was on Friday, he just sniffed around the couch and then he came and lied down on the couch. The other nights he didn't do any extra sniffing just jumped up on the couch where he usually sits. Buddy sits in this same spot when he comes out, neither of them seem to take notice of smelling each other on the couch. It's right beside where I sit so may be why they come there.
When Frankie is sniffing at Buddy's door, neither of them gets obviously stressed. Buddy will look over or even sometimes get closer to the door but doesn't get his hackles up or anything. Frankie will just flatten down, trying to see under which he can't and will then move on to more interesting pursuits. So I feel like things are going well.
Will continue the no visual and continue to monitor. Hoping Buddy's peeing/spraying around the litter box will continue to diminish this week.
"Good morning, hope you had a good long weekend!" - Thank you, I hope you did as well!!

" Things are going pretty well with Buddy and Frankie, both seem more relaxed overall." - GREAT!!!

"Buddy has been really wanting out of his room, particularly in the mornings." - Ok. :/ It is good that he wants to which tells me he is not fearing Frankie that much.

"He will come out for 5-10 minutes and then go back in on his own." - Does he walk back in normal? Confident?

"I was going to be happy to report no spraying/peeing around the litter box as he didn't do it for 3 days straight but then he did it yesterday." - :/ I got excited then I read the "but". :(

" Not sure what the trigger was, he had been out prior so maybe just smelling Frankie around." - Could be but why not a previous day? What time of day did he go outside of the box? Morning?

What is on the other side of the wall where the litter box is?

Is he a long cat? Tall, or big cat?

" We got him a cat tree so he can sit and look out the window..." - GREAT!!!

"of course he wants nothing to do with it " - Yep :/ Cats........... BUT he has the option and I suspect he will use it AND it will give him something to "own".

Did he spray after the new tree came in?

"but he now jumps up on the window ledge and looks out which he wouldn't do before." - Great. Can he see other animals out of that window?

"Overall he seems relaxed/settled." - Great. Other than the inappropriate peeing he sounds great.

"Frankie seems more relaxed as well." - Great, he is the key.

" He will still go over and sniff at Buddy's door but doesn't hang around." - OK, feel free to reassure him tell him you love him, etc.

" One day he sniffed around the TV room after Buddy was in there, this was on Friday, he just sniffed around the couch and then he came and lied down on the couch. " - GREAT!!!

"The other nights he didn't do any extra sniffing just jumped up on the couch where he usually sits. Buddy sits in this same spot when he comes out, neither of them seem to take notice of smelling each other on the couch. It's right beside where I sit so may be why they come there." - PERFECT!!!

"When Frankie is sniffing at Buddy's door, neither of them gets obviously stressed. Buddy will look over or even sometimes get closer to the door but doesn't get his hackles up or anything. Frankie will just flatten down, trying to see under which he can't and will then move on to more interesting pursuits. So I feel like things are going well." That is great. Feel free to reassure them, etc.

"Will continue the no visual and continue to monitor. " - Great, I think we can try to doing some meal time on opposite sides of the door in a day or two if all seems like it has been. They are doing great.

"Hoping Buddy's peeing/spraying around the litter box will continue to diminish this week. " - Yes. Nothing obvious. IF it was Frankie he would be showing signs of stress when out, when he is around, etc. I don't think it is Frankie. :/

Do you have a blacklight? Can you check around the areas and also outside to see if there are any other markings?

Overall, this sounds amazing and you are back on track it seems. Let me know when Frankie is back to pre-vacation behavior. He sounds like he is close. But want to make sure.

Are they playing at all?

Fantastic. Great work!!! :)
 
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"He will come out for 5-10 minutes and then go back in on his own." - Does he walk back in normal? Confident?
When he's out of his room he will walk slow and look around, he isn't 'slinking' but not a confident walk, kind of in between. If I have the container of Temptations in my hand he'll come running to me no matter what :) He'll often come out and lie down in the hall and looks very relaxed. If he hears an unfamiliar noise or I get up he'll often trot back into his room.

" Not sure what the trigger was, he had been out prior so maybe just smelling Frankie around." - Could be but why not a previous day? What time of day did he go outside of the box? Morning?
It was a morning when my husband was up before me so the difference could be that I wasn't around. I seem to be his security blanket but he does like my husband, too. I'm also thinking that may have been the day that Frankie pooped in the communal litter box so maybe that made Buddy want to claim his litter territory?

What is on the other side of the wall where the litter box is?

Is he a long cat? Tall, or big cat?
The litter box is between two shelving units so not right against an outside wall, it's about 1 1/2 feet away from the door, maybe I'll try moving it further away from the door. Buddy is a big cat, I think he's part Maine Coon, my sister has one and he has the same look. Very long and his paws are huge. He's much bigger than Frankie who is just a little guy, 8lbs.

I don't have a black light but will look into getting one.

I am feeling things are back on track! Frankie does his playing outside mostly, he's often tearing around the yard chasing things, brought a dead bird into the house this morning, ugh! He will play with toys on a string. Buddy hasn't played yet but he is interested in a catnip mouse I brought him but he more just rubs himself on it. I will try again with the string toys now that he seems more relaxed.

I will let you know how things are going end of week. Maybe this weekend when I'm home they'll be ready for the next step, will keep you posted.
 

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When he's out of his room he will walk slow and look around, he isn't 'slinking' but not a confident walk, kind of in between. If I have the container of Temptations in my hand he'll come running to me no matter what :) He'll often come out and lie down in the hall and looks very relaxed. If he hears an unfamiliar noise or I get up he'll often trot back into his room.


It was a morning when my husband was up before me so the difference could be that I wasn't around. I seem to be his security blanket but he does like my husband, too. I'm also thinking that may have been the day that Frankie pooped in the communal litter box so maybe that made Buddy want to claim his litter territory?


The litter box is between two shelving units so not right against an outside wall, it's about 1 1/2 feet away from the door, maybe I'll try moving it further away from the door. Buddy is a big cat, I think he's part Maine Coon, my sister has one and he has the same look. Very long and his paws are huge. He's much bigger than Frankie who is just a little guy, 8lbs.

I don't have a black light but will look into getting one.

I am feeling things are back on track! Frankie does his playing outside mostly, he's often tearing around the yard chasing things, brought a dead bird into the house this morning, ugh! He will play with toys on a string. Buddy hasn't played yet but he is interested in a catnip mouse I brought him but he more just rubs himself on it. I will try again with the string toys now that he seems more relaxed.

I will let you know how things are going end of week. Maybe this weekend when I'm home they'll be ready for the next step, will keep you posted.
"When he's out of his room he will walk slow and look around, he isn't 'slinking' but not a confident walk, kind of in between." - Ok, not great but understandable. We'll get him feeling more ownership soon.

" If I have the container of Temptations in my hand he'll come running to me no matter what :) " - Yes

He'll often come out and lie down in the hall and looks very relaxed.

"If he hears an unfamiliar noise or I get up he'll often trot back into his room." - Ok. As we build his confidence and security he'll improve that and the more confident he is the less likely they will get into anything between them.

"It was a morning when my husband was up before me so the difference could be that I wasn't around." - Could be.

" I seem to be his security blanket " - Yes, we will use that going forward.

"but he does like my husband, too." - Great

" I'm also thinking that may have been the day that Frankie pooped in the communal litter box so maybe that made Buddy want to claim his litter territory?" - Yes, very well could be.

"The litter box is between two shelving units so not right against an outside wall, it's about 1 1/2 feet away from the door, maybe I'll try moving it further away from the door. Buddy is a big cat, I think he's part Maine Coon, my sister has one and he has the same look. Very long and his paws are huge. He's much bigger than Frankie who is just a little guy, 8lbs." - I wonder if it feels too confined for him. Too tight if that makes sense. I don't like moving litter boxes so can you add one in a more open space? See if it is a space issue. How is the communal litter box set up? Is it more "open" or accessible? Does he ever go in it? Or sprayed around it?

"I don't have a black light but will look into getting one." - Ok, I am interested in finding out if there is any other marking inside or out.

"I am feeling things are back on track! " - Great to hear. It seems like it. :)

"Frankie does his playing outside mostly, he's often tearing around the yard chasing things, brought a dead bird into the house this morning, ugh! " - Ok. Yep, they will bring gifts.

"He will play with toys on a string." - Good, if you can get him to play with those indoors that could be very helpful. Then feed after play.

" Buddy hasn't played yet but he is interested in a catnip mouse I brought him but he more just rubs himself on it." - Ok

" I will try again with the string toys now that he seems more relaxed." - Great, yes please.

"I will let you know how things are going end of week. Maybe this weekend when I'm home they'll be ready for the next step, will keep you posted. " - Sounds great, keep up the great work!!!

We'll get them intro'd. :)
 
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"The litter box is between two shelving units so not right against an outside wall, it's about 1 1/2 feet away from the door, maybe I'll try moving it further away from the door. Buddy is a big cat, I think he's part Maine Coon, my sister has one and he has the same look. Very long and his paws are huge. He's much bigger than Frankie who is just a little guy, 8lbs." - I wonder if it feels too confined for him. Too tight if that makes sense. I don't like moving litter boxes so can you add one in a more open space? See if it is a space issue. How is the communal litter box set up? Is it more "open" or accessible? Does he ever go in it? Or sprayed around it?
The litter box isn't too cramped, the space is about 4 feet wide but I do have it up close to one side so it's more in a corner. I could just slide it down a foot so he has more room on both sides. When things were going well before he was using the communal litter box regularly but I haven't seem him use it recently. It is in our bathroom and probably similarly spaced as the other one. He used to spray around this one, too when he was using it but hasn't recently. It is an extra large litter box for him in his room and the one in the bathroom is also big. We have another one that he doesn't yet have access to in the living room that Frankie also uses but it isn't very big so will need to replace it once they are intro'd and sharing.
 

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The litter box isn't too cramped, the space is about 4 feet wide but I do have it up close to one side so it's more in a corner. I could just slide it down a foot so he has more room on both sides. When things were going well before he was using the communal litter box regularly but I haven't seem him use it recently. It is in our bathroom and probably similarly spaced as the other one. He used to spray around this one, too when he was using it but hasn't recently. It is an extra large litter box for him in his room and the one in the bathroom is also big. We have another one that he doesn't yet have access to in the living room that Frankie also uses but it isn't very big so will need to replace it once they are intro'd and sharing.
"The litter box isn't too cramped, the space is about 4 feet wide but I do have it up close to one side so it's more in a corner. I could just slide it down a foot so he has more room on both sides. " - If you can do that I would try to move it that foot. Let's see if that might help.

" When things were going well before he was using the communal litter box regularly but I haven't seem him use it recently." - Ok

" It is in our bathroom and probably similarly spaced as the other one. He used to spray around this one, too when he was using it but hasn't recently." - Ok, but has he not sprayed because he didn't want to use it?

"It is an extra large litter box for him in his room and the one in the bathroom is also big." - Yes, I am thinking it might be more the walls than the actual box. But great it is the big one for him.

" We have another one that he doesn't yet have access to in the living room that Frankie also uses but it isn't very big so will need to replace it once they are intro'd and sharing." - Ok, good idea.

Once he gets more confident and territorially secure the marking should end. But we need to get there. I hope maybe the space is a possible issue but ultimately I suspect it is just a confidence issue. BUT we'll get that confidence up. He is getting better.
 
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Hi calicosrspecial, we've had some progress over the week dictated but Buddy. I've attached a pic of him out in his area from the tv room. Behind him you can see the gate with blanket over it. He has decided he's had enough of being closed up in his room. He's fine if we leave the door open but meows when it's closed. He's become much more chatty overall, likes to say good morning and let you know when he wants food or treats. He comes out regularly to wander a bit then will go back in his room. He seems pretty comfortable when he's out. Still nervous with unfamiliar noises but he is definitely getting more relaxed.
Frankie was coming over to the door when when Buddy was meowing and just sitting there, seemed curious, not stressed. They also will be on opposite sides of the gate and seem fine.
Last night I woke up hearing meowing, came downstairs to see that Buddy had managed to move aside the sheet that we had secured to the window in his door to block the view. They were on either side looking at each other. Neither seemed upset just sitting looking at each other. I'm pretty sure it was Frankie that was meowing before I came down but he didn't sound stressed, just talking. I moved him away and closed the gate and he came up to bed. So a good encounter I think.
I fed them on either side of the gate this morning, both ate and ignored each other. They can't see each other still with the blanket on the gate. They were both about six feet away from the gate so not close.
Buddy has only sprayed once this week, it was at the communal litter box that he's started using again, not sure what the trigger was but our neighbour was cutting down trees with a chain saw so he was stressed about that.
So I think things are going well. I was going to keep feeding them on either side of the gate and start moving them slowly closer. What do you think?
 

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Hi calicosrspecial, we've had some progress over the week dictated but Buddy. I've attached a pic of him out in his area from the tv room. Behind him you can see the gate with blanket over it. He has decided he's had enough of being closed up in his room. He's fine if we leave the door open but meows when it's closed. He's become much more chatty overall, likes to say good morning and let you know when he wants food or treats. He comes out regularly to wander a bit then will go back in his room. He seems pretty comfortable when he's out. Still nervous with unfamiliar noises but he is definitely getting more relaxed.
Frankie was coming over to the door when when Buddy was meowing and just sitting there, seemed curious, not stressed. They also will be on opposite sides of the gate and seem fine.
Last night I woke up hearing meowing, came downstairs to see that Buddy had managed to move aside the sheet that we had secured to the window in his door to block the view. They were on either side looking at each other. Neither seemed upset just sitting looking at each other. I'm pretty sure it was Frankie that was meowing before I came down but he didn't sound stressed, just talking. I moved him away and closed the gate and he came up to bed. So a good encounter I think.
I fed them on either side of the gate this morning, both ate and ignored each other. They can't see each other still with the blanket on the gate. They were both about six feet away from the gate so not close.
Buddy has only sprayed once this week, it was at the communal litter box that he's started using again, not sure what the trigger was but our neighbour was cutting down trees with a chain saw so he was stressed about that.
So I think things are going well. I was going to keep feeding them on either side of the gate and start moving them slowly closer. What do you think?
"Hi calicosrspecial, we've had some progress over the week dictated but Buddy." - GREAT!!!

" I've attached a pic of him out in his area from the tv room." - HE IS GORGEOUS!!!

" Behind him you can see the gate with blanket over it." - Yes, I can.

"He has decided he's had enough of being closed up in his room. " - Yes, that tells me he isn't fearing Frankie that much which is great BUT Frankie has to feel confident and comfortable as well.

"He's fine if we leave the door open but meows when it's closed." - :/ Yes, that will happen.

"He's become much more chatty overall, likes to say good morning and let you know when he wants food or treats." - Awwwww, he is feeling more at home. :)

"He comes out regularly to wander a bit then will go back in his room." - Really? Frankie is out I assume.

" He seems pretty comfortable when he's out." - Yes, that is great. He is feeling more ownership and confidence. Now we need to get him to feel it with Frankie.

" Still nervous with unfamiliar noises" - Understandably.

" but he is definitely getting more relaxed." - Great

"Frankie was coming over to the door when when Buddy was meowing and just sitting there, seemed curious, not stressed." - THAT is GREAT!!! I am a bit surprised actually. Great. Reassure Frankie that all is ok.

" They also will be on opposite sides of the gate and seem fine." - Perfect.

"Last night I woke up hearing meowing, came downstairs to see that Buddy had managed to move aside the sheet that we had secured to the window in his door to block the view. They were on either side looking at each other. Neither seemed upset just sitting looking at each other." - Wow

" I'm pretty sure it was Frankie that was meowing before I came down but he didn't sound stressed, just talking. I moved him away and closed the gate and he came up to bed. So a good encounter I think." _ GREAT!!! I am amazed actually.

"I fed them on either side of the gate this morning, both ate and ignored each other. " - Perfect!!

"They can't see each other still with the blanket on the gate. They were both about six feet away from the gate so not close." - Ok, great

"Buddy has only sprayed once this week, it was at the communal litter box that he's started using again, not sure what the trigger was but our neighbour was cutting down trees with a chain saw so he was stressed about that." - :/ Ok.

"So I think things are going well." - TOTALLY AGREE!!!

" I was going to keep feeding them on either side of the gate and start moving them slowly closer. What do you think?" - Agreed. I am actually thinking about giving some visual. Since they seem to already be doing that and doing it well.

Well, THAT is an amazing update. I need to think about visual when eating. I really want to do it. Maybe tomorrow if all still is going well?
 
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Ridney

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"Hi calicosrspecial, we've had some progress over the week dictated but Buddy." - GREAT!!!

" I've attached a pic of him out in his area from the tv room." - HE IS GORGEOUS!!!

" Behind him you can see the gate with blanket over it." - Yes, I can.

"He has decided he's had enough of being closed up in his room. " - Yes, that tells me he isn't fearing Frankie that much which is great BUT Frankie has to feel confident and comfortable as well.

"He's fine if we leave the door open but meows when it's closed." - :/ Yes, that will happen.

"He's become much more chatty overall, likes to say good morning and let you know when he wants food or treats." - Awwwww, he is feeling more at home. :)

"He comes out regularly to wander a bit then will go back in his room." - Really? Frankie is out I assume.

" He seems pretty comfortable when he's out." - Yes, that is great. He is feeling more ownership and confidence. Now we need to get him to feel it with Frankie.

" Still nervous with unfamiliar noises" - Understandably.

" but he is definitely getting more relaxed." - Great

"Frankie was coming over to the door when when Buddy was meowing and just sitting there, seemed curious, not stressed." - THAT is GREAT!!! I am a bit surprised actually. Great. Reassure Frankie that all is ok.

" They also will be on opposite sides of the gate and seem fine." - Perfect.

"Last night I woke up hearing meowing, came downstairs to see that Buddy had managed to move aside the sheet that we had secured to the window in his door to block the view. They were on either side looking at each other. Neither seemed upset just sitting looking at each other." - Wow

" I'm pretty sure it was Frankie that was meowing before I came down but he didn't sound stressed, just talking. I moved him away and closed the gate and he came up to bed. So a good encounter I think." _ GREAT!!! I am amazed actually.

"I fed them on either side of the gate this morning, both ate and ignored each other. " - Perfect!!

"They can't see each other still with the blanket on the gate. They were both about six feet away from the gate so not close." - Ok, great

"Buddy has only sprayed once this week, it was at the communal litter box that he's started using again, not sure what the trigger was but our neighbour was cutting down trees with a chain saw so he was stressed about that." - :/ Ok.

"So I think things are going well." - TOTALLY AGREE!!!

" I was going to keep feeding them on either side of the gate and start moving them slowly closer. What do you think?" - Agreed. I am actually thinking about giving some visual. Since they seem to already be doing that and doing it well.

Well, THAT is an amazing update. I need to think about visual when eating. I really want to do it. Maybe tomorrow if all still is going well?
Thanks, I'm really happy with how things are going. I'm still not sure Frankie is ready, he is definitely more comfortable with things but I'm thinking another week with them having the visually blocked gate between to make sure. I'm feeling a little nervous still 🙄 Thanks again for your help, I'll keep you posted.
 

calicosrspecial

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Thanks, I'm really happy with how things are going. I'm still not sure Frankie is ready, he is definitely more comfortable with things but I'm thinking another week with them having the visually blocked gate between to make sure. I'm feeling a little nervous still 🙄 Thanks again for your help, I'll keep you posted.
"Thanks, I'm really happy with how things are going." - :) Wonderful!!

" I'm still not sure Frankie is ready, he is definitely more comfortable with things but I'm thinking another week with them having the visually blocked gate between to make sure." - Ok. You are my eyes and ears. What specifically are you seeing that suggest we hold back?

"I'm feeling a little nervous still 🙄 " - Understandably. Cats do take on our emotions so it is important to be as calm and confident as possible so that they can absorb and then reflect those emotions.

Let's let the facts dictate our path.

"Thanks again for your help, I'll keep you posted." - You are very welcome. You are obviously doing a great job. :) Keep it up!!!
 
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Ridney

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" I'm still not sure Frankie is ready, he is definitely more comfortable with things but I'm thinking another week with them having the visually blocked gate between to make sure." - Ok. You are my eyes and ears. What specifically are you seeing that suggest we hold back?
I feel like he's mostly back to his old self but is still a bit insecure I think. It's hard to put my finger on it but he seems more cuddly/wanting attention than usual so I think it's showing him feeling a bit insecure. I am giving him lots of attention. I did just feed them again on either side of the gate and they were fine, ignored each other. I think a week of doing this with them having a bit more interaction with the gate instead of the closed door and we'll just make sure Frankie can handle it.
 

calicosrspecial

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I feel like he's mostly back to his old self but is still a bit insecure I think. It's hard to put my finger on it but he seems more cuddly/wanting attention than usual so I think it's showing him feeling a bit insecure. I am giving him lots of attention. I did just feed them again on either side of the gate and they were fine, ignored each other. I think a week of doing this with them having a bit more interaction with the gate instead of the closed door and we'll just make sure Frankie can handle it.
"I feel like he's mostly back to his old self but is still a bit insecure I think." - Ok. Do you think Buddy is causing it? If so, how so? Is he acting differently in places Buddy has been? Etc?

" It's hard to put my finger on it but he seems more cuddly/wanting attention than usual so I think it's showing him feeling a bit insecure." - Ok, yes. He wants to make sure his safety, food, water, litter box, love will not change. Giving him all that will help him feel more secure and confident.

" I am giving him lots of attention." - GREAT!!! Exactly the right thing to do.

" I did just feed them again on either side of the gate and they were fine, ignored each other." - Perfect!!! :)

" I think a week of doing this with them having a bit more interaction with the gate instead of the closed door and we'll just make sure Frankie can handle it." - Well. The best thing to do is interaction with something good (and distracting) like food. So using a "bridge" to allow them positive interaction. Having them sit there, be focused on each other at this point can be risky. So I would use food/feeding with the gate with visual and see how they do. I suspect they will be fine.

Keep up the great work. You are doing something right to be getting this amount of good progress!!
 
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