introduction of kitten not done properly :(

Alyanerin

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 31, 2022
Messages
9
Purraise
11
Hello everyone,
7 months ago I got a 3 years old cat (Jaskier) who was going to be abandonned by his humans. Before I got him, he stayed for 2 weeks at a friends house (the one who rescued him) who also had a cat. Apparently he his at the begining but after 2 days became friends with the other cat (playing and cuddling).
This led me to believe that he's probably prefer to have another cat in the house...
Fast forward to now: he's at ease, playful and we decided to get a new kitten. 4-5 months old, very playful, was in a house with his brother and 2 adult cats for the past couple of months (he was picked up off the streets as a baby). The kitten loved following and playing with the adult cats. So I thought the kitten would get along well with Jaskier!

House situation: 2 fairly large rooms + kitchen and hallway from entrance to the kitchen and through both rooms.

Failed introduction: we didn't lock in Jaskier the moment my bf entered the house with the kitten so they were directly exposed, Jaskier became very violent, making aggressive noises and hissing loudly at the kitten, we took the kitten to the other room and the cat actually wanted to follow to continue hissing etc so I took him to his room (our bedroom where he usually feels safest). Kitten was in my BF's arms all this time and didn't seem to understand what was happening.

After failed introduction: we kept kitten in the living room (closed with door), he didn't hide, we played a lot, he ate, he let us pet him and purred. He also found a hidden place to sleep in. He seems alright.
Jaskier on the other hand mostly stayed hidden under the bed (he does usually like to play/sleep under the bed but not the whole day, normally he also comes on the bed for petting and playing). When my bf (who was initially carrying the kitten) comes to the bedroom and tries to approch Jaskier, the cat hisses at him and growls. I guess because he smells kitten on him (but I also play and pet kitten and he doesn't do that to me).
At the end of the day, we decided I sleep in the bedroom with Jaskier, and BF with kitten in the living room.
Jaskier came out during the night, he even played with me with the fishing rod and let me pet him and slept on the bed. But usually during the night or in the morning he comes sleeping on me while purring. He didn't do that.

Now we have Jaskier in bedroom and he also have access to the rest of the house except the living room.
The kitten only has access to the living room.

What should we do now? I feel like we completely lost Jaskier's trust... We should've known better but I thought it would be okay since he wasn't aggressive towards my friend's cat :( should I exchange the rooms during the day? put the kitten in the bedroom and jaskier in the livingroom?

Sorry for my english, I hope this wasn't too long and I thank you for reading! (I read the full guide on introduction and how to fix unsuccessful one)

babies.png
 

ArtNJ

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jun 1, 2017
Messages
5,496
Purraise
6,977
It is useful to do a formal introduction process to reduce stress a bit before letting the cats work out any remaining issues. Here, where the adult cat is stressed enough to lash out at its humans, a process is definitely a good idea. Here is our guide:

How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles

Since they haven't actually fought, no long or even medium term harm has been done. Adult cats dont actually fight with kittens, and its often possible for a young adult to adjust to a kitten even without any formal introduction process. For you though, since yours seems to have a fairly high level of stress, some introduction process seems wise. The overall prognosis is still excellent with good chances for true friendship.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #3

Alyanerin

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 31, 2022
Messages
9
Purraise
11
Oh thanks a lot!!! That's very reassuring. We will follow the different steps!

No need to exchange the rooms for a bit during the day?

What do you mean by "before letting the cats work out any remaining issues" ? will it be okay to let Jaskier hiss at the kitten to show that he's the boss as long as he doesn't try to assault him physically? wouldn't that be stressful to the kitten? I thought the only behavior acceptable is if they just sniff each other or ignore each other (when they're not friends).
 

D_H

TCS Member
Adult Cat
Joined
Jan 1, 2022
Messages
106
Purraise
198
It can be stressful for us, but it will be OK :)

Follow the guidelines, step-by-step and don't try to hurry things up.
Do what for need to do for the cats, and don't neglect yourself - and soon it'll all be behind you :)
 

rubysmama

Forum Helper
Staff Member
Forum Helper
Joined
Nov 25, 2013
Messages
25,352
Purraise
63,060
Location
Canada
Hello and welcome to TCS. Sorry though for the situation that brought you here.

How long have you had the kitten now? Has it just been one day?

Good that you have them separated now. The link A ArtNJ posted is the most comprehensive article on cat introductions, but we also have one on How To Introduce A Kitten To An Older Cat | TheCatSite

Plus How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction – TheCatSite Articles, as cat introductions don't also go as planned.

Keeping the kitten in the one room, and letting Jaskier have normal run of the rest of the home is the best way to proceed. However, occasionally do put him in another room, even if just the bathroom, and let the kitten has access to the rest of the home, so his scent will get in the other rooms. That'll help Jaskier get used to the kitten's scent.

Hopefully before too long, they will be friends. :catlove:
 

ArtNJ

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jun 1, 2017
Messages
5,496
Purraise
6,977
No need to exchange the rooms for a bit during the day?
The idea is to let the cats get used to each others smell. You can swap rooms, you can bring in a favorite blanket with the smell or you can just wait while the smells waft. I don't necessarily think room swapping is crucial, the idea is just to let them get used to each others smell.

What do you mean by "before letting the cats work out any remaining issues" ? will it be okay to let Jaskier hiss at the kitten to show that he's the boss as long as he doesn't try to assault him physically? wouldn't that be stressful to the kitten? I thought the only behavior acceptable is if they just sniff each other or ignore each other (when they're not friends).
Face-to-face is always going to be more stressful, so there isn't necessarily any introduction process that gets them 100% of the way done, they come out and boom they are friends. The idea is to get out enough stress that they can do the rest on their own. So if you finish an introduction process and there is some moderate hissing, thats totally fine. My current two, the adult hissed for two days after the introduction process -- and they are besties now. Pretty normal. Right now you have a good bit more than that, so backing up makes sense.
 

Doody

TCS Member
Young Cat
Joined
May 31, 2019
Messages
26
Purraise
30
ArtNJ gives great advice! We are on week three of introducing a kitten to our 2 1/2 year old female. I don’t want to jinx it, but I think it is progressing very well.

We did a week of room swapping, a week of exposing them through the French (glass) doors, and this week they are face to face.

Read the article on this site about introducing a kitten to an older cat.

We are taking this as slowly as we need to.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #8

Alyanerin

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 31, 2022
Messages
9
Purraise
11
Thank you everyone for your replies!

It has been indeed only a day. We brought the kitten yesterday noon (it's 6pm for me right now). Luckily my bf will be available all this month even if I go back to work tomorrow!

Jaskier stays hidden most of the time though :( I'll try the sock thing and swapping rooms, I think he misses the living room since he usually plays and eats there.

I am not really able to make them eat at the same time though (each in their area), because Jaskier is eating less than usually, only when no one is looking and not necessarily as soon as I give him his food... here's hoping he becomes less stressed in time and back to his usual eating schedule.
 

Furballsmom

Cat Devotee
Staff Member
Forum Helper
Joined
Jan 9, 2018
Messages
39,387
Purraise
54,101
Location
Colorado US
Try some calming products or if you don't have access to those, try some Music For Cats, or classical harp music for him.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #10

Alyanerin

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 31, 2022
Messages
9
Purraise
11
Hello everyone! I'm back with an update :D
So since my last msg, we started swapping rooms twice a day and Jaskier stopped hissing. Then he started acting normal again (playing, laying on us, meowing for food) and started getting interested in the other room. He would chill in the corridor sniffing under the door.
Today is day 5 after the first time they met: at one point I was with the kitten in the bedroom and when I opened the door to go out, Jaskier was there and he didn't run away nor hiss. He seemed very curious about the room. So I decided to put a sort of babygate and let them see each other (the kitten was mostly on opposite side of the door playing). While I was doing that, Jaskier went back to the living room and chilled on the floor. I was planning on staying with kitten just in case, but I had to leave for 1min. During this minute Jaskier went sniffing the gate and then he straight up jumped T_T

So... Both met under the bed. Kitten in a corner (but not "cornered" he could run towards the chair or desk to hide) and Jaskier was looking at him. Just looking and sniffing the air. No hissing or growling or anything. I decided to distract the kitten, so I played with him (he's easily distracted) and my bf tried to distract Jaskier on the other part. Didn't succeed really, he was mostly watching the kitten play and then he just laid on the floor comfortably (on the side) while watching. This continued for a while and then Jaskier even did his happy sound (a sort of cooing like birds, idk the exact term in English) :D Yay !
The best part though was when a wasp came to the room. They were both chasing it and going crazy with the weird meowing because it was too far lol

Oh at one point I didn't pay attention and the kitten ran towards the plate I put for Jaskier with treats and food and started eating. I thought we were ****ed but Jaskier actually just watched ... So I took the kitten and put him in the other room where he has his food.

After that I separeted them and then from time to time they would watch each other from the gate or ignore each other. Jaskier wasn't stressed at all, he acted as normal in the bedroom and even started purring and then licking himself.

TLDR: Scent desensitization was a success, vision desensitization was a failure (gate too small) they ended up in the same room and there was no aggressive behavior, Jaskier even did his cooing sound and they fought a common enemy (wasp).

I guess this is all positive? But I'm not sure at which point do I consider the introduction complete? What do I do now? Keep the gate and the surveilliance and then close the living room's door during the night?

Thank you all again for your help!!! :D
 

ArtNJ

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jun 1, 2017
Messages
5,496
Purraise
6,977
Its a kitten and a young adult, and you passed a temperature check. Just let them be together. If there is a little hissing thats fine. They will be friends within days if not sooner.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #13

Alyanerin

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 31, 2022
Messages
9
Purraise
11
Hello again here. So it's been almost a week that all the doors are open and they can hang with each other.
There were moments when they slept next to one another and others when Jaskier groomed the kitten. Not often though.
Sadly there are also moments when they fight :( I think. I've been told it's normal to "establish dominance" but I find it very hard to not stop them.
See a video of the only time I could stay this long before I intervened (usually as soon as I hear a meow I call Jaskier or pet him and push him and he lets go of the kitten; I also tend to distract them with a toy way before it gets this "heated").

Is this bad? Should I stop them sooner? I've also been checking their bodies each time to make sure they're not hurt and I don't see any injuries.
Sometimes it's the kitten chasing Jaskier. And sometimes the kitten hides in places where Jaskier can't reach him, should I then stop Jaskier or are they playing? Also, I see them often just lay next to each other, on the back.

Any advice is more than welcome. Thanks again!
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #15

Alyanerin

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 31, 2022
Messages
9
Purraise
11
Due to this, and them laying next to each other, although I couldn't see the video I'd say they're doing just fine.

Try and relax and let them do their catly things :)
Thank you Furbalismom, but I'm having a hard time letting them "play" like in the video... I just turned the settings public so you should be able to see it now! The end up meowing and hissing :/ I even found a bit of furr on Jaskier's claws...
 

ArtNJ

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jun 1, 2017
Messages
5,496
Purraise
6,977
I saw the video and that is 100% playing. The smaller kitten is squealing a little bit because of mild discomfort or maybe just because. But in any event, the smaller kitten is still enjoying the wrestling. Even if the smaller kitten runs off sometimes, and comes back later acts like nothing happend, that shows everything is fine.

You can relax and let them be, I promise. Sure, the size difference leads to some issues, just the same way as you'd have with 3 and 5 year old human boys. But they are still enjoying playing, and the big one isn't actually hurting the little one.

Truthfully, we didn't even really need to see the video, since kittens this young essentially always become friends by this point. And they have done so, they are friends. Its just not a perfectly equal friendship yet, because one is bigger. The smaller kitten is still getting a net benefit from the play even if at times they might feel its a bit much.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #20

Alyanerin

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 31, 2022
Messages
9
Purraise
11
Whaaaaaaaat !!!! I am shocked hahah I was hoping you guys would say that but didn't actually expect it!
I'm soooo happy this website and this forum and all of you exist on here!!!
I cannot thank you enough.

I will stop annoying them by interfering haha I will also sleep more soundly because the past nights I didn't allow myself to sleep too deeply in case I heard the weird meowing... to think that it's probably because of me if they didn't become closer... I probably made them feel like it was a bad thing to play together :(
 
Top