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calicosrspecial

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I wouldn't say that my stress level amps up at all. And Duncan was with other kitties, I'm sure, before I got him. He was in a foster home. But again, I got him at 6 months old, and he's 12 now.




Yes - that other cat did attack Duncan, twice. The worst was when she launched herself off the top of the cat tree and chased him down. He hid under that bed most of the day after that. I had her 5 weeks before I pulled the plug. The main reason, aside from her attacks on Duncan, was that she just wasn't getting comfortable with me. I'd have Duncan locked up in the bedroom for 8+ hours a day, trying to let Gracie out in the house to get comfortable. Instead, she would hide under the couch the entire time. This was still going on at 5 weeks.





No, I think he was eyeballing Indy the entire time.





Duncan was fine when he came running over to me. Nothing about him said he was upset, or still upset at that point. I didn't see Indy right after, but from what I've seen before, nothing really rattles him. I would think this would be the same.
"I wouldn't say that my stress level amps up at all." - Ok, good.

"And Duncan was with other kitties, I'm sure, before I got him. He was in a foster home. But again, I got him at 6 months old, and he's 12 now." - I am wondering about proper socialization from his mother. But with that said, he is fine with Indy a lot of the time. So if it was that he wouldn't be accepting as much.

"Yes - that other cat did attack Duncan, twice." - Ahhhhhhhhhhh. I think we have it now. He is getting over the trauma of that. The stress. That is why he accepts quite a lot but then just doesn't get that final bit.

"The worst was when she launched herself off the top of the cat tree and chased him down. He hid under that bed most of the day after that." - :( Yep. He was traumatized.

"Instead, she would hide under the couch the entire time." - Poor thing. That is actually very common. I deal with ferals so I see that all the time but I see it with non-feral cats all the time. There is a process that works pretty well. Moot point now but too bad we didn't know each other then. :(

"No, I think he was eyeballing Indy the entire time." - Ok, try to get him to look away. He does it at the beginning so I know he can do it later in the session.

"Duncan was fine when he came running over to me. Nothing about him said he was upset, or still upset at that point." - That is great. That tells me it was nothing really. Sounds don't always mean bad and when respected it actually is pretty good. This is what tells me they are so close. He would not be acting like this if there were real issues.

"I didn't see Indy right after, but from what I've seen before, nothing really rattles him. I would think this would be the same." - Yes, I don't think Indy would have had issues. Which again tells me that Duncan is not really scary to Indy. You know when you were a kid you kinda knew when your parent was just "upset" at you and when they were "really seriously mad"? You know how when you know it is like "Oh no, I really am in trouble". It is the same with cats, they know the annoyance hiss or actions vs the "this is serious" actions.

Both Duncan and Indy don't view the other as an "existential threat". If they did they would be avoiding, hiding, never eating with them, turning their backs, fighting, attacking, etc. It is more like having a pesty roommate rather than having a "serial killer" roommate.

I think I understand what is going on better. Makes sense. (Gracie experience). But Indy is doing everything right which is why you are this close.. I do believe in my heart Duncan is going to accept and I expect soon. It is literally almost like a light turning on. I think you are almost there.
 

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I decided to break out of our typical meet and greets to see how this goes.

Duncan had curled up on top of the couch, so I decided to let Indy out. I brought the whole toy box out to keep him busy. It's been over 20 minutes so far. For the first 14 minutes, Duncan watched everything Indy did, which was just play with toys and explore. I know Indy saw Duncan a couple of times. At one point, he even walked over toward the couch. I grabbed a rattle ball, though, and that brought him back. Indy has also been checking the house, under Duncan's watchful eye.

At the 15 minute mark, while Indy is who knows where, Duncan put his little head down and closed his eyes. He's happily sleeping right now.

I'm sitting in the living room, fairly far from Duncan, but close enough should Indy decide to try anything. But he's, I have no idea where, doing I have no idea what. He's so quiet. There's nothing for him to get into, so I'm not worried about that. He might be sleeping in the dining room.

Aaaaaaaand...he's back in the LR. He's still just checking things out. That woke Duncan up, but he's perfectly fine.

All I know is there is peace in our home right now. Ahhhhhhhh.

I put Indy back in the hall/bedroom/bathroom after 40 minutes. Nothing bad happened, but I didn't want to risk it. 40 minutes is a good run, though.
 
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calicosrspecial

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I decided to break out of our typical meet and greets to see how this goes.

Duncan had curled up on top of the couch, so I decided to let Indy out. I brought the whole toy box out to keep him busy. It's been over 20 minutes so far. For the first 14 minutes, Duncan watched everything Indy did, which was just play with toys and explore. I know Indy saw Duncan a couple of times. At one point, he even walked over toward the couch. I grabbed a rattle ball, though, and that brought him back. Indy has also been checking the house, under Duncan's watchful eye.

At the 15 minute mark, while Indy is who knows where, Duncan put his little head down and closed his eyes. He's happily sleeping right now.

I'm sitting in the living room, fairly far from Duncan, but close enough should Indy decide to try anything. But he's, I have no idea where, doing I have no idea what. He's so quiet. There's nothing for him to get into, so I'm not worried about that. He might be sleeping in the dining room.

Aaaaaaaand...he's back in the LR. He's still just checking things out. That woke Duncan up, but he's perfectly fine.

All I know is there is peace in our home right now. Ahhhhhhhh.

I put Indy back in the hall/bedroom/bathroom after 40 minutes. Nothing bad happened, but I didn't want to risk it. 40 minutes is a good run, though.
"I decided to break out of our typical meet and greets to see how this goes." - Ok

"Duncan had curled up on top of the couch, so I decided to let Indy out." - Great.

" I brought the whole toy box out to keep him busy." - Perfect

"It's been over 20 minutes so far. For the first 14 minutes, Duncan watched everything Indy did, which was just play with toys and explore." - Great

" I know Indy saw Duncan a couple of times. At one point, he even walked over toward the couch. I grabbed a rattle ball, though, and that brought him back. Indy has also been checking the house, under Duncan's watchful eye." - AWESOME!!

"At the 15 minute mark, while Indy is who knows where, Duncan put his little head down and closed his eyes. He's happily sleeping right now." - WOW!!!! :yess: :hyper: :clap2:

"I'm sitting in the living room, fairly far from Duncan, but close enough should Indy decide to try anything. But he's, I have no idea where, doing I have no idea what. He's so quiet. There's nothing for him to get into, so I'm not worried about that. He might be sleeping in the dining room." - Great

"Aaaaaaaand...he's back in the LR. He's still just checking things out. That woke Duncan up, but he's perfectly fine." - WHOA!!! Perfectly fine????? :yess: So DUncan saw Indy and didn't really care?

"All I know is there is peace in our home right now. Ahhhhhhhh." - This is a REALLY BIG DEAL. Duncan accepted. We were going to do this 2 weeks ago. I am SO GLAD you did this.

"I put Indy back in the hall/bedroom/bathroom after 40 minutes. Nothing bad happened, but I didn't want to risk it. 40 minutes is a good run, though." - GREAT!!! I think we had the light switch moment. :D :cheerleader:

I wish you could see the smile on my face right now!!! I am SO PROUD of Duncan!!! AND you and Indy. They are going to be just fine. Wow, I expected this but not today. Wow.

You did the exact right thing!!! GREAT job!!! I am SO PROUD of you!!! :cheerleader:

Just keep doing what you are doing. I think you had that major breakthrough. Sure there will be blips but now I have no doubt they are going to be just fine. I am over the moon right now!!!! :hyper:
 

pearl99

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I decided to break out of our typical meet and greets to see how this goes.

Duncan had curled up on top of the couch, so I decided to let Indy out. I brought the whole toy box out to keep him busy. It's been over 20 minutes so far. For the first 14 minutes, Duncan watched everything Indy did, which was just play with toys and explore. I know Indy saw Duncan a couple of times. At one point, he even walked over toward the couch. I grabbed a rattle ball, though, and that brought him back. Indy has also been checking the house, under Duncan's watchful eye.

At the 15 minute mark, while Indy is who knows where, Duncan put his little head down and closed his eyes. He's happily sleeping right now.

I'm sitting in the living room, fairly far from Duncan, but close enough should Indy decide to try anything. But he's, I have no idea where, doing I have no idea what. He's so quiet. There's nothing for him to get into, so I'm not worried about that. He might be sleeping in the dining room.

Aaaaaaaand...he's back in the LR. He's still just checking things out. That woke Duncan up, but he's perfectly fine.

All I know is there is peace in our home right now. Ahhhhhhhh.

I put Indy back in the hall/bedroom/bathroom after 40 minutes. Nothing bad happened, but I didn't want to risk it. 40 minutes is a good run, though.
B Beyond Confused Yay!!!! I will tell you I'm at this point with my most recently adopted cat Ziggy, who is 14 years old. (She is the "Indy" of your household but a senior cat and calmer.)
So you have a cat-mate haha and a sympathizer. I'm just rinsing and repeating. Keep a-goin'!
 

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"I decided to break out of our typical meet and greets to see how this goes." - Ok

"Duncan had curled up on top of the couch, so I decided to let Indy out." - Great.

" I brought the whole toy box out to keep him busy." - Perfect

"It's been over 20 minutes so far. For the first 14 minutes, Duncan watched everything Indy did, which was just play with toys and explore." - Great

" I know Indy saw Duncan a couple of times. At one point, he even walked over toward the couch. I grabbed a rattle ball, though, and that brought him back. Indy has also been checking the house, under Duncan's watchful eye." - AWESOME!!

"At the 15 minute mark, while Indy is who knows where, Duncan put his little head down and closed his eyes. He's happily sleeping right now." - WOW!!!! :yess: :hyper: :clap2:

"I'm sitting in the living room, fairly far from Duncan, but close enough should Indy decide to try anything. But he's, I have no idea where, doing I have no idea what. He's so quiet. There's nothing for him to get into, so I'm not worried about that. He might be sleeping in the dining room." - Great

"Aaaaaaaand...he's back in the LR. He's still just checking things out. That woke Duncan up, but he's perfectly fine." - WHOA!!! Perfectly fine????? :yess: So DUncan saw Indy and didn't really care?

"All I know is there is peace in our home right now. Ahhhhhhhh." - This is a REALLY BIG DEAL. Duncan accepted. We were going to do this 2 weeks ago. I am SO GLAD you did this.

"I put Indy back in the hall/bedroom/bathroom after 40 minutes. Nothing bad happened, but I didn't want to risk it. 40 minutes is a good run, though." - GREAT!!! I think we had the light switch moment. :D :cheerleader:

I wish you could see the smile on my face right now!!! I am SO PROUD of Duncan!!! AND you and Indy. They are going to be just fine. Wow, I expected this but not today. Wow.

You did the exact right thing!!! GREAT job!!! I am SO PROUD of you!!! :cheerleader:

Just keep doing what you are doing. I think you had that major breakthrough. Sure there will be blips but now I have no doubt they are going to be just fine. I am over the moon right now!!!! :hyper:
Thank you. I think I'll try it again when there's not food involved...in other words - when Duncan is relaxed and just hanging out. it worked well yesterday.
 

calicosrspecial

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Thank you. I think I'll try it again when there's not food involved...in other words - when Duncan is relaxed and just hanging out. it worked well yesterday.
Sounds good. Anything to get that result. Positive encounter.

Duncan seems to be like 95% of the way to trusting Indy. Last night was amazing and proves that in my eyes.

Indy shows so desire to start any shenanigans which is very helpful. And I think Duncan is realizing that.

I am ecstatic. Keep up the great work!!!
 

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I don't know if this really helps but I've been putting "Relax My Cats" or "Music for Cats" on a few minutes before I let Ziggy out, on my TV through my Roku box, it is on YouTube. It helps me anyway :).
I found out about this from Furballsmom Furballsmom .
I've been trying to get Ziggy to play a bit while the others see her and vice versa- with the others being on a chair, table, couch rather than on the floor to get them used to seeing the other move around with no negatives. Currently Ziggy just stays on the floor when she's out. It's only me in my home so it can be a bit of a challenge but it's going good!
 

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I don't know if this really helps but I've been putting "Relax My Cats" or "Music for Cats" on a few minutes before I let Ziggy out, on my TV through my Roku box, it is on YouTube. It helps me anyway :).
I found out about this from Furballsmom Furballsmom .
I've been trying to get Ziggy to play a bit while the others see her and vice versa- with the others being on a chair, table, couch rather than on the floor to get them used to seeing the other move around with no negatives. Currently Ziggy just stays on the floor when she's out. It's only me in my home so it can be a bit of a challenge but it's going good!
Yep, I have that channel on my Roku. I haven't thought to use it, but I'll try it tonight. Thanks for the reminder.
 

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We just gave it another go, this time for 30 minutes.

Duncan had settled in on the back of the sofa, so I let Indy in. For 15 minutes, he walked around, sniffing. Eventually, he came and sprawled out next to me...then, he explored some more. Duncan watched him. Here was one of his more "stressful" moments.

Then, Indy hopped up on the coffee table. You can see Duncan in the background, keeping his eye on him.

And then...Indy decided that Duncan looked interesting enough to harass. He hopped over to the couch, Duncan let out a little growl, and just as Indy tried to take a little lunge, I snatched him up. Back in the hallway he went.

Duncan isn't too stressed by it. He's still curled up on the couch, even gave himself a bath.

Mostly successful. I just don't know how to keep Indy from getting to the point of wanting to "play" with Duncan at this point. I tried throwing his rattle ball, which caught his attention for a split second, but then he turned back to Duncan. I guess the good news is that that second he had his eye on the ball, it gave me time to get over to the couch.
 

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calicosrspecial

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We just gave it another go, this time for 30 minutes.

Duncan had settled in on the back of the sofa, so I let Indy in. For 15 minutes, he walked around, sniffing. Eventually, he came and sprawled out next to me...then, he explored some more. Duncan watched him. Here was one of his more "stressful" moments.

Then, Indy hopped up on the coffee table. You can see Duncan in the background, keeping his eye on him.

And then...Indy decided that Duncan looked interesting enough to harass. He hopped over to the couch, Duncan let out a little growl, and just as Indy tried to take a little lunge, I snatched him up. Back in the hallway he went.

Duncan isn't too stressed by it. He's still curled up on the couch, even gave himself a bath.

Mostly successful. I just don't know how to keep Indy from getting to the point of wanting to "play" with Duncan at this point. I tried throwing his rattle ball, which caught his attention for a split second, but then he turned back to Duncan. I guess the good news is that that second he had his eye on the ball, it gave me time to get over to the couch.
"We just gave it another go, this time for 30 minutes." - Great. 30 mins is fantastic

"Duncan had settled in on the back of the sofa, so I let Indy in. For 15 minutes, he walked around, sniffing." - Great

" Eventually, he came and sprawled out next to me..." - How far were you from Duncan?

"then, he explored some more. Duncan watched him." - Great, accepting

" Here was one of his more "stressful" moments." - ok

"Then, Indy hopped up on the coffee table. You can see Duncan in the background, keeping his eye on him." - WOW, they are gorgeous cats!!! I have a cat that looks like Duncan. SO HANDSOME!!! And Indy. Wow. Beautiful cats. Sorry, but they were stunning. Now back to work. Duncan body language looks great in that pic. I don't see anything to suggest trouble. He seems really relaxed. Indy has his ear towards him which is interesting.

"And then...Indy decided that Duncan looked interesting enough to harass." - Yep, he wants to play.

"He hopped over to the couch, Duncan let out a little growl, and just as Indy tried to take a little lunge," - So Indy responded to the growl? Duncan was more subdued in his reaction (before the lunge) than usual?

"I snatched him up. Back in the hallway he went." - Ok

"Duncan isn't too stressed by it. He's still curled up on the couch, even gave himself a bath." - Well that is great!!

"Mostly successful." - I would call it very successful. Because of how Duncan was. He accepted and when Indy came up he only growled, didn't attack and then when Indy lunged he bounced back pretty much right away. And Duncan didn't run, etc. That is really telling and really good.

"I just don't know how to keep Indy from getting to the point of wanting to "play" with Duncan at this point." - Indy has to learn (and probably be taught by Duncan) that play is not an option.

"I tried throwing his rattle ball, which caught his attention for a split second, but then he turned back to Duncan." - Did you call his name? Do any reassuring as well? Did you sense any tension?

" I guess the good news is that that second he had his eye on the ball, it gave me time to get over to the couch." - I think there is a lot of good news as I already mentioned but yes, that is good and shows Duncan that the focus isn't total.

Overall, I think it was great. Duncan will have to step up and let Indy know. When Duncan is growling just call Indy or direct him away. Keep distracting (or trying to) Indy with toys, words.

If you walked up to Indy on the couch and pet him, talked to him etc what do you think would have happened? Would you be totally safe from both cats?

Keep up the great work.
 

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" Eventually, he came and sprawled out next to me..." - How far were you from Duncan?
You can tell from the picture below because I was sitting on the other side of the coffee table.



"He hopped over to the couch, Duncan let out a little growl, and just as Indy tried to take a little lunge," - So Indy responded to the growl? Duncan was more subdued in his reaction (before the lunge) than usual?
Um...he was about to hop up in Duncan's direction, when I snatched him up. I guess that means he responded to the growl.
Duncan just stayed curled up where he was. He didn't jump or anything when Indy lunged

.
"I just don't know how to keep Indy from getting to the point of wanting to "play" with Duncan at this point." - Indy has to learn (and probably be taught by Duncan) that play is not an option.
Should I just let it go next time to see what comes of it? I was trying to keep it from getting negative.


"I tried throwing his rattle ball, which caught his attention for a split second, but then he turned back to Duncan." - Did you call his name? Do any reassuring as well? Did you sense any tension?
Yes, I tried to call his name as well, but it didn't get his attention.



Duncan will have to step up and let Indy know. When Duncan is growling just call Indy or direct him away. Keep distracting (or trying to) Indy with toys, words.
But what if, like yesterday, a distraction didn't work with Indy? Should I just let it go to see what happens?



If you walked up to Indy on the couch and pet him, talked to him etc what do you think would have happened? Would you be totally safe from both cats?
I'm never concerned for my safety with them, so I can try it. My initial reaction was just to snatch him up to keep it from going south,
 

calicosrspecial

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You can tell from the picture below because I was sitting on the other side of the coffee table.





Um...he was about to hop up in Duncan's direction, when I snatched him up. I guess that means he responded to the growl.
Duncan just stayed curled up where he was. He didn't jump or anything when Indy lunged

.


Should I just let it go next time to see what comes of it? I was trying to keep it from getting negative.




Yes, I tried to call his name as well, but it didn't get his attention.





But what if, like yesterday, a distraction didn't work with Indy? Should I just let it go to see what happens?





I'm never concerned for my safety with them, so I can try it. My initial reaction was just to snatch him up to keep it from going south,
"You can tell from the picture below because I was sitting on the other side of the coffee table." - Ok, perfect

"Um...he was about to hop up in Duncan's direction, when I snatched him up. I guess that means he responded to the growl." - How "aggressive was it?

"Duncan just stayed curled up where he was. He didn't jump or anything when Indy lunged " - Serious? Ok, guess Duncan didn't think it was a big deal (or aggressive). That is great!!

"Should I just let it go next time to see what comes of it? I was trying to keep it from getting negative." - Not yet, your instinct was correct. I am thinking of going over there, petting Indy, talking to and reassuring Duncan, petting Duncan, bringing out a fishing pole toy to coax Indy down. Things like that but ONLY if you are safe and will not be scratched, hurt, etc. You did the right thing though. Avoiding negative is most important.

"Yes, I tried to call his name as well, but it didn't get his attention." - Ok. Bummer

"But what if, like yesterday, a distraction didn't work with Indy? Should I just let it go to see what happens?" - Not yet. I want Duncan to be a bit more trusting/confident. So what I mentioned above is best if possible then removing Indy is second best. We will have to go there in time though (see what happens) but not yet.

"I'm never concerned for my safety with them, so I can try it." - Well, I do want you to be safe. Things can happen unexpectedly and not intentionally. They are great sweet cats so I think the risk is low but it is not zero. :/

"My initial reaction was just to snatch him up to keep it from going south," - Yep, I have been there many times.
 

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"Um...he was about to hop up in Duncan's direction, when I snatched him up. I guess that means he responded to the growl." - How "aggressive was it?
I don't know because I grabbed him pretty quickly.


"I'm never concerned for my safety with them, so I can try it." - Well, I do want you to be safe. Things can happen unexpectedly and not intentionally. They are great sweet cats so I think the risk is low but it is not zero. :/
Well, I know that I have absolutely zero safety issues with Duncan. In 12 years, he has never shown aggression to me, even after fighting with Admiral, or when he got a bath, or gets his medicine...not even when I take him to the vet's office, where he is the least happy. Indy, I guess, would be more of a toss up.
 

calicosrspecial

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I don't know because I grabbed him pretty quickly.




Well, I know that I have absolutely zero safety issues with Duncan. In 12 years, he has never shown aggression to me, even after fighting with Admiral, or when he got a bath, or gets his medicine...not even when I take him to the vet's office, where he is the least happy. Indy, I guess, would be more of a toss up.
"I don't know because I grabbed him pretty quickly." - Understandable. That is a reason why we watch how they rebound. The fact Duncan wasn't too fazed by it tells me it wasn't that bad.

"Well, I know that I have absolutely zero safety issues with Duncan. In 12 years, he has never shown aggression to me, even after fighting with Admiral, or when he got a bath, or gets his medicine...not even when I take him to the vet's office, where he is the least happy." - Sounds like he is such a sweet cat. I can see why you love him so much. You two have a bond.

"Indy, I guess, would be more of a toss up." - Yes, because he is more unknown. Always best to be cautious but I am guessing the risk is pretty low since you pick him up in those situations and he is so good. You know him best but he seems like a great cat. But it is always best to be aware. There are mitigation things like our emotions, not cornering a cat, being confident, not staring at them, looking aggressive, etc.

I deal with unknown ferals all the time and see others (well I did before Covid) and see all the time how the human impacts the cat's behavior. You must be doing a great job.

I actually feel like you moved closer these past two days and I thought you were close before. Just keep up the great work.
 

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That didn't last long, maybe 15 minutes.
Duncan was on the back of the couch, so I let Indy out again. He walked around, and then he spotted Duncan about 3 minutes in. The rest of the time was me trying to distract Indy because he just kept turning his attention on Duncan. It's exhausting.

Duncan watched Indy the whole time, but he didn't show any signs of stress, which is good. I don't know what he would've done, though, if I would've let Indy do what he was looking to do.

Almost immediately after I put Indy back in the hallway, Duncan fell asleep on the couch.
 

calicosrspecial

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That didn't last long, maybe 15 minutes.
Duncan was on the back of the couch, so I let Indy out again. He walked around, and then he spotted Duncan about 3 minutes in. The rest of the time was me trying to distract Indy because he just kept turning his attention on Duncan. It's exhausting.

Duncan watched Indy the whole time, but he didn't show any signs of stress, which is good. I don't know what he would've done, though, if I would've let Indy do what he was looking to do.

Almost immediately after I put Indy back in the hallway, Duncan fell asleep on the couch.
"That didn't last long, maybe 15 minutes." - ok

"Duncan was on the back of the couch, so I let Indy out again. He walked around, and then he spotted Duncan about 3 minutes in. The rest of the time was me trying to distract Indy because he just kept turning his attention on Duncan. It's exhausting." - Yes, it can be exhausting. :/ Indy wasn't interested in his toys? Was he interested in playing or just wondering what Duncan was doing?

"Duncan watched Indy the whole time, but he didn't show any signs of stress, which is good." - Wow, that is GREAT!!!

" I don't know what he would've done, though, if I would've let Indy do what he was looking to do." - Do you think Indy was ready to go u there and start pawing, etc?

"Almost immediately after I put Indy back in the hallway," - Ok. Indy isn't a cuddler yet? Doesn't have interest in looking outside? How focused is he on Duncan, does he look away, or move away then go back?

"Duncan fell asleep on the couch." - THAT is GREAT. I guess Duncan didn't think Indy was a threat which is great. THAT is the most important point.

I would like to see if we can redirect Indy to a window, or hanging with you (if you can and it is safe). Things like that.

Given Duncan's reaction (or non-reaction) it seems Indy is just trying so hard to be friends but isn't getting any love in response. :/ It doesn't seem threatening which is great (otherwise Duncan would be reacting and much differently).

I want to reinforce this trust Duncan is developing. Use food or a fishing pole toy or looking out of the windows or safe love to break the focus on Duncan.

I am ecstatic at how Duncan has come along. He is showing much more confidence. He is accepting Indy. He may have to teach/tell Indy at some point but I want to just give it a little more time before that moment. If you can get Indy to look away, walk away without physically removing him and he stays away for a while (eating, looking out of the window, playing etc) that would be great.

You are almost there. :cheerleader:
 

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Thursday afternoon:

Duncan was sprawled out on my desk, so I allowed Indy to come out. Immediately, Duncan scrunched up on the table and let out little meows. He had his eyes on Indy the whole time. Indy saw him, but he didn't try to get to him. I'm sure it's because I was sitting in the chair, so there wasn't that clear-cut path.

Indy check out and sniffed both cat trees, even crawled up in one of the boxes, which was surprising. He also used Duncan's litter box, which had Duncan now standing to see what was going on.

Eventually, Duncan, much to my surprise, jumped off the table, which grabbed Indy's attention. Indy hopped off the cat tree and jogged after him. They ran out to the LR, and I saw Duncan raise his paw to Indy. That's as far as they got before I stepped between them and corralled Indy back to his hallway.
 

Beyond Confused

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"Duncan was on the back of the couch, so I let Indy out again. He walked around, and then he spotted Duncan about 3 minutes in. The rest of the time was me trying to distract Indy because he just kept turning his attention on Duncan. It's exhausting." - Yes, it can be exhausting. :/ Indy wasn't interested in his toys? Was he interested in playing or just wondering what Duncan was doing?
He definitely wanted to jump up on the couch to get to Duncan. He had a bit of a crazed look in his eye.



"Almost immediately after I put Indy back in the hallway," - Ok. Indy isn't a cuddler yet? Doesn't have interest in looking outside? How focused is he on Duncan, does he look away, or move away then go back?
He likes to look outside, but yesterday, he was totally focused on Duncan.
He's coming around to the cuddling, but he's still like a toddler who can't sit still. He has to be in everything.


I would like to see if we can redirect Indy to a window, or hanging with you (if you can and it is safe). Things like that.
I will give it a shot, since he loves looking out the large front window.
 

calicosrspecial

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Thursday afternoon:

Duncan was sprawled out on my desk, so I allowed Indy to come out. Immediately, Duncan scrunched up on the table and let out little meows. He had his eyes on Indy the whole time. Indy saw him, but he didn't try to get to him. I'm sure it's because I was sitting in the chair, so there wasn't that clear-cut path.

Indy check out and sniffed both cat trees, even crawled up in one of the boxes, which was surprising. He also used Duncan's litter box, which had Duncan now standing to see what was going on.

Eventually, Duncan, much to my surprise, jumped off the table, which grabbed Indy's attention. Indy hopped off the cat tree and jogged after him. They ran out to the LR, and I saw Duncan raise his paw to Indy. That's as far as they got before I stepped between them and corralled Indy back to his hallway.
Thursday afternoon:

"Duncan was sprawled out on my desk, so I allowed Indy to come out." - I was going to suggest this for this weekend as I worried about your work needs. But this is great.

"Immediately, Duncan scrunched up on the table and let out little meows." - How did Indy come out? Fast? Right towards Duncan? How was Indy's body language?

"He had his eyes on Indy the whole time." - Expected

" Indy saw him, but he didn't try to get to him. I'm sure it's because I was sitting in the chair, so there wasn't that clear-cut path." - THAT is great. That Indy didn't try to get him and that there wasn't a clear path. Avoiding a negative. Though I do wonder how much was Indy respecting Duncan which you may be able to shed light on.

"Indy check out and sniffed both cat trees, even crawled up in one of the boxes, which was surprising." - AWESOME!!! This is EXACTLY what I want to see. Indy chosing other things rather than Duncan.

"He also used Duncan's litter box, which had Duncan now standing to see what was going on." - Interesting. I would like to know how Duncan responds to that.

"Eventually, Duncan, much to my surprise, jumped off the table," - Right after the litter box use?

" which grabbed Indy's attention. Indy hopped off the cat tree and jogged after him." - Yep, it will.

"They ran out to the LR" - How was the body language?

" and I saw Duncan raise his paw to Indy." - That is fine, what did Indy do?

"That's as far as they got before I stepped between them and corralled Indy back to his hallway." - Ok

A lot of positives. This is really good.

How is Duncan acting after this? Did he use the litter box soon after?

"He definitely wanted to jump up on the couch to get to Duncan. He had a bit of a crazed look in his eye." - Yes. Hmmmm, Duncan did not seem intimidated so it may not have been too "crazed"?

"He likes to look outside" - Great.

"but yesterday, he was totally focused on Duncan." - Yeah, my guess he wants to play with him. :/

"He's coming around to the cuddling, but he's still like a toddler who can't sit still. He has to be in everything." - That is good he is coming around. Yep, they tend to be like that. Into everything, not settled. So much energy and wanting to play.

"I will give it a shot, since he loves looking out the large front window." - Perfect. Let's hope there are birds and squirrels and rabbits to get his attention.
 

Beyond Confused

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"Immediately, Duncan scrunched up on the table and let out little meows." - How did Indy come out? Fast? Right towards Duncan? How was Indy's body language?
Well, Indy walked out, but he still has that kitten swagger about him, if you know what I mean.



" Indy saw him, but he didn't try to get to him. I'm sure it's because I was sitting in the chair, so there wasn't that clear-cut path." - THAT is great. That Indy didn't try to get him and that there wasn't a clear path. Avoiding a negative. Though I do wonder how much was Indy respecting Duncan which you may be able to shed light on.
I think that, had I not been sitting in the chair, Indy would've hopped right up there and gotten in Duncan's face.



"He also used Duncan's litter box, which had Duncan now standing to see what was going on." - Interesting. I would like to know how Duncan responds to that.
He just peered over the table and watched Indy. I would imagine that, in his mind, he was thinking, "Ummmm, EXCUSE ME?!?"


"Eventually, Duncan, much to my surprise, jumped off the table," - Right after the litter box use?
Yeah, maybe a minute or two after. Indy had already moved on and was now sitting in the lower cat tree box, looking out the window.



"They ran out to the LR" - How was the body language?
Duncan just hopped down and was going on his way, Indy looked like he was ready for a rumble when he jumped down and tagged along. How they were before I made it to the LR, I don't know.


" and I saw Duncan raise his paw to Indy." - That is fine, what did Indy do?
Well, I didn't give him a whole lot of chance to respond before I stepped between them and shifted Indy back to the hallway. He was easy to "encourage" along to the hallway, meaning, I didn't pick him up. He walked himself over.



How is Duncan acting after this? Did he use the litter box soon after?
Duncan's acting fine. He's sleeping up in the cat tree. He didn't use the box, but he had used it shortly before I let Indy out.
Indy has used his box before, though, and he's (Duncan) had no issues using it later. I don't think he's actually seen Indy use it before, but I'm sure cats know.
 
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