How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on & point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3) Insist that your e mail address is:
[email protected]
or [email protected]
4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
5) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
6) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once
everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
7) In the memo field of all your checks, write "FOR
SEXUAL FAVORS."
8) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the
prophecy."
9) Dont use any punctuation
10) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
11) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically
after they answer.
12) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
13) Sing along at the opera.
14) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poemsdon't
rhyme.
15) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
16) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
17) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I
Won!", "I Won!" "3rd time this week!!!"
18) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity....
19) Send this e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it to you or have asked you not to send them stuff like this.
1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on & point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3) Insist that your e mail address is:
[email protected]
or [email protected]
4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
5) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
6) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once
everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
7) In the memo field of all your checks, write "FOR
SEXUAL FAVORS."
8) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the
prophecy."
9) Dont use any punctuation
10) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
11) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically
after they answer.
12) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
13) Sing along at the opera.
14) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poemsdon't
rhyme.
15) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
16) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
17) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I
Won!", "I Won!" "3rd time this week!!!"
18) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity....
19) Send this e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it to you or have asked you not to send them stuff like this.
