In desperate need of help

Amisi

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I have two cats, a ragdoll mix 7 years, and a tabby mix 6 years. Both are femaled and spayed not declawed. The cat I need help with is my ragdoll. We rescued her when she was 6 months old. She's always been on the prissy side (my way or the highway type of cat) which was fine, until my husband and I decided to have our first baby.

Ever since the baby, who is almost 9 month now, we have had so many issues with her it breaks my heart.

Issues:
1. Occasionally pees on my husband's items only (backpack, clothes..) this only happens rarely. 3x now since baby was born
2. Completely bullies our other cat to the point where there is no nice contact between them or play (my other cat is now terrified and hides alot)
3. Meows at my baby's door at night to purposely get my husband and I's attention
4. Scratches the baby's hamper

Now, all of these behaviors we can deal with, but the tipping point was today, when the cat scratched my baby's finger. It was an accident, baby was playing, cat tried to attack the toy but got the baby. The cat has always played very rough, with full claws extended even before the baby, we just keep her nails trimmed.

This was the tipping point for my husband, because the cut is bad and my daughter has been in a lot of pain. He's ready to get rid of our cat 😭

My husband is willing to try soft paws, but is there even a point? I love my cat dearly, but her happiness is more important to me. Do you think she would be better off in another home for both our cats sake? I feel like she may rebel more with soft paws but I have no experience with them.

I understand the behavior is from the baby and the lack of attention. We give her as much attention as we can, but it's obviously decreased. When we do special things for her, she actually rebels more and makes the situations worse.

Please help 😭
 

verna davies

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I'm so sorry you find yourself in this position, its heartbreaking. I have no experience in something like this but in your position, as its been 9 months and no change on the attitude of your ragdoll, I would consider finding someone you know and trust, a relative, friend neighbour, that will home your cat, this way you can rest assured that the cat had a good home where be will be happy and you can still see him. The only other solution and not ideal, is to completely separate your cat from your baby and other cat but I doubt he would be happy being restricted and would it be fair on him.
 

di and bob

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It was an accident, not an attack. There will be scratches because that is the way human babies learn about their environment. Your cat is nervous and upset with the baby's arrival. She WIILL learn in time, but cats need a long time to adjust, as you are finding out. Maybe a calming aide on Amazon or from your vet can help soothe her nerves. I would highly recommend trying one. The urine marking is her way of letting you know she is claiming you as hers, and taht she is upset. Get a good enzyme cat urine remover such as Nature's miracle to completely remove the urine. Keep her from the baby as much as possible, and supervise at all times. you two getting upset is feeding her unease too. this is something that almost everyone goes through, you are not alone. my grandson would not leave the cats alone until he finally got scratched, but your baby is not able to pursue them yet and is completely helpless, so the cat needs to stay away as much as possible. Get her a cat tree for her to escape to and to observe the baby from a distance. firmly tell the cat no when she approaches the baby and pick her up and move her back, many times. This is something that will clear up in time. It is natural to have this reaction when your baby gets hurt. but the baby will get hurt from falls, and MANY other natural happenings too, you cannot protect them from everything and shouldn't. for now just keep the cat at a distance, try some calming aides, and give her plenty of places to escape to. give her treats when she is in the presence of the baby to provoke pleasant feelings. PLEASE keep us informed on how things are going. You are NOT alone!
 

danteshuman

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Since this is a desperate situation, I suggest soft paws, tons of catification shelves/trees, maybe some prozac for your troubled ragdoll (& ragdoll are usually so mellow it is like they are sedated!!!) Give your stressed kitty extra TLC and start getting your baby to practice soft pets as your baby becomes a toddler. All those high up places will help keep her out of your baby’s reach.

Just in case it hasn’t been done, take her to the vet to rule out UTIs & bladder crystals.
 

danteshuman

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I second the cat is only around the baby with close supervision. I also agree it was an accident not an attack. The soft paws were more for your husband’s peace of mind, than anything else.
 

Furballsmom

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You've gotten good suggestions and advice from the above posters.

Will she allow you to put on the soft paws, or could a vet tech come by your house to help with that?
 
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