I’m glad nobody is around when I tell my cat….

iPappy

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When my kittens sing and beg excitedly for their meals to be put down, I pretend I know what they're saying and reply to it accordingly. So they'll be meowing their heads off, and I'll thoughtfully reply "Oh, no one's ever fed you? You're absolutely malnourished? You're going to report me to management and you refuse to tip me?" and then sometimes it gets a bit dark. "Oh you were two seconds away from resorting to eating your brother? Oh my gosh, then you were going to eat me too?!"

They get fed about every four hours, by the way. 🤦‍♀️
LOL, I do this too! After every meow, I'll begin a conversation....(meow) "Oh really?" (meow) "I did not know that." (meow) "yeah, I agree." (meow) "LOL I never thought of it that way." I'll also tell them "Don't look at me in that tone of voice." And with Livie, the Papillon, I'll say a random sentence out of the blue silence just to see her head tile 90 degrees and her ears shoot up.
 

Meowmee

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There are so many… 😹 please don’t do a stinky poopy diarrhea etc. that mom has to clean up because she just scooped etc. Or who did the stinky poop😹 stop sniffing his bum, it’s gross 😹 they do that while the other one is eating, mostly Quinn 😀

we are not eating anymore because we brushed our toothies 😹

And my all time wacky- your mom is a cat, what do you think of that😹
 

iPappy

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I have an "I love my kitty" song I made up when I got my cat. Good gracious if anyone ever heard me sing all 3 verses LOL
The song "So Caught Up In You" by 38 Special has been ruined so many times in my house. "Little girl" has been replaced with "Little terd" (or something similar to a terd, if you catch my drift) on such a regular basis, I have to practically bite my tongue in half from replacing "girl" with "terd" if I find myself singing it within earshot of anyone else. :lol:
 

Cat McCannon

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Oh, Lordy, the songs. If people at my place of work ever knew the ridiculous songs I sing-- just now, as Juno was going down the stairs ahead of me, it was: Junebug, Junebug, wiggle wiggle, butt butt-- I would never be able to show my face again.
When Belle precedes me from one room to another, I’ll sing

Trot Trot, Kitty Kitty, Trot Trot!

I’m always telling her what a pretty kitty she is and that she’s my girl.

I sing to her “Purr Purr Kitty Kitty Purr Purr” to the tune of “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang”

Sometimes when I’m crossing Tiger Country (the dining room), Belle will rush out from where she’s hiding and swat my ankles or leap up and attack my thighs (toe beans only, never any claws). I’ll throw up my arms, fall to the floor and wail “Oh, you got me! The Great Warrior Princess of Clan Grey Tiger has taken me down. Now, she savagely tears the liver from my body and eats it! Tell my wife- tell my wife my last words were of my love for her!”
 

iPappy

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When Belle precedes me from one room to another, I’ll sing

Trot Trot, Kitty Kitty, Trot Trot!

I’m always telling her what a pretty kitty she is and that she’s my girl.

I sing to her “Purr Purr Kitty Kitty Purr Purr” to the tune of “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang”

Sometimes when I’m crossing Tiger Country (the dining room), Belle will rush out from where she’s hiding and swat my ankles or leap up and attack my thighs (toe beans only, never any claws). I’ll throw up my arms, fall to the floor and wail “Oh, you got me! The Great Warrior Princess of Clan Grey Tiger has taken me down. Now, she savagely tears the liver from my body and eats it! Tell my wife- tell my wife my last words were of my love for her!”
All hilarious but that bolded part has me laughing, especially "now she savagely tears the liver from my body and eats it." :lol:
 

Theauctions1

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Usually what I tell my cat I end up over sharing to everyone I know 😂😂
Today's a song in Spanish I made up on the spot
"Lamete las patitas
No las bolitas "
Which roughly translates to "lick your paws but not your balls"
He was neutered a few days and keep taking his cone off 😓😓😓 so I just sing that song to him
There are different types of cones out there, some cloth based. Just keep a lookout for urinary blockages and infections that happen over time. Las patitas de los gatitos o los mininos siempre dan felicidad!☺
 

BellaBlue82

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Not really the words, but when we are alone I sing while I carry one of my cats in my arms in a slow dance:

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine....
You make me happpyyy, when skies are gray...
You'll never know dear, how much I love you
Please don't take, my sunshine awaaayy..."


Then we kiss each other's noses. :lol:
At least I know I'm not the only one that sings to my princess. ❤ But she loves Talking Heads instead LOL
 

treeclimber

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As I walked towards the litter tray I announced to the cat. Your a good boy but that's it I'm stealing your poop no we don't want a stank.
Haha, me too!

Oh have you seen the poopie-thief
The poopie-thief, the poopie-thief
Oh have you seen the poopie-thief
She’s here to steal your poop!
(To the tune of “Have you seen the muffin man?”)

(I spelled it “poopie” to indicate that it’s a noun and not an adjective. A poopie-thief is someone who steals poopies, not a thief who is poopy.)
 
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daftcat75

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Betty was “helping” me fold laundry. Really she was just getting her nose into everything. “Doesn’t smell like my pits anymore. You’re gonna have to come to the source for that.” 😹

I wear yoga tanks at home and she likes to paint my (ticklish) pits with her cold wet nose.
😽🤦🏼‍♂️😹
 
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silent meowlook

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“Cheetah-Petita-Mohita-Bonita!!!”
“Omypaw-OhhhMeeePawPAWPAWPAE”””Where’s the mousie??!”
“CHEETAH PAWPAWPAW!!”
“Seriously, fatty boombalati!!” “You can’t be hungry again!”
“Guys, seriously, I have to get something done today!” PLEASE!!! I am losing it guys......Stop chasing your sister, you ;:$&@‘!!”
“No, fine, I’ll just sit here all day.”
Mommy loves her little fuzzy nutters!!”
“ Let’s go nappies.””snuggle bunnie paw paw paws”

Honestly I say it all almost every day in that order. If anyone heard me I would be locked up I am sure.
 

BellaBlue82

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Kitchen Lovins time with Sadie.... " Aw, who's a pretty mama?? Kitchen mushy time!! Nom nom nom I'm gonna eat your toes, oh those cute little tosie's!!! Aw, pretty mama princess pants, mwah mwah mwah!"
 

iPappy

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“Cheetah-Petita-Mohita-Bonita!!!”
“Omypaw-OhhhMeeePawPAWPAWPAE”””Where’s the mousie??!”
“CHEETAH PAWPAWPAW!!”
“Seriously, fatty boombalati!!” “You can’t be hungry again!”
“Guys, seriously, I have to get something done today!” PLEASE!!! I am losing it guys......Stop chasing your sister, you ;:$&@‘!!”
“No, fine, I’ll just sit here all day.”
Mommy loves her little fuzzy nutters!!”
“ Let’s go nappies.””snuggle bunnie paw paw paws”

Honestly I say it all almost every day in that order. If anyone heard me I would be locked up I am sure.
Don't forget "Lemme see dem toe beans!" as they stretch and extend their paw up at you. So cute!
 
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