My kitty Luella, 15 and a half, was doing fine. Then in September we went in for an annual check up and she had no problems other than anemia. I did not think much of it. The vet told me to try and give her a higher protein food. At the time I declined any further diagnostics, such as trying to see if she had a GI bleed. My general philosophy is inclined to favor less extreme interventions, and palliative care. But a month later, she yelped suddently, and got weak in the back legs. Took her in right away - they checked her blood again and she had gotten even more anemic. They really did not have an explanation for the sudden weakness. (only lasted a minute). They thought maybe blood clots, or maybe a tumor causing sudden pain. They checked for feline leukemia and another condition, negative. (blood tests) Sent her home on steroids (which I could not get her to take other than a couple doses) She had two more such episodes but was normal otherwise. Has never been a good eater and she was definately dropping weight. So I got worried and brought her in for a belly ultrasound and more blood work. Ultrasound did not show anything. But her red blood cells had dropped dangerously low. I was told that unless we did a transfusion (over a thousand dollars), she would die within the week. I debated but decided against it because the doctor said she would likely only improve for 3-4 weeks. They sent her home after a steroid injection and a nausea injection. That was this week. She was in bad shape from the sedation from the ultrasound for about 2 days. She never really got back to normal. She stopped eating entirely and I had to carry her to the litter box. She would kind of snuff at her water bowl. She spent her time lying in my guitar case, her favorite spot. Her eyes were dull and her ears and mouth were white (from anemia). My vet knew that I have a palliative care philosophy so she suggested that euthanasia would be an okay idea. We did home euthanasia 2 days ago. It was beautiful and I spent most of the day petting and cuddling her (except that there were times when I think she just wanted to be alone). I could not asked for a better experience but nonetheless I feel like I gave up on her too soon, and I am in so much pain and miss her so much. My house is empty. I keep calling her name and thinking I see and hear her. I can't stop obsessing about this. I could use some support! I feel like a bad cat Mom!