I Could Use Some Moral Support

solomonar

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Sometimes I just thinking to people experiencing the feeling of separation from they beloved Cats. I am just thinking. I am sure that they are a lot of other humans thinking the same way. Some may say a prayer, some may cry, some do nothing but feeling empathy.

So you will never be alone.

===

As practical advise I may say a special attention is needed for Spike to eat, drink and feel comfortable. I would not rush in medical-type advise, but only highlighting that un-healthy cat encounters problems in tasks that a healthy cat can easily solve out.

Have a water bowl large enough and easy to drink from, replace water once or better twice a day. Make sure the teeth are OK. Help him when needed. I do not know Spike's habits, but usually cats do "hunting" Dawn and Dusk - so these are the period of time he may need some assistance (climbing, jumping - whatever).

Anyway, by a very strange and unknown method these felines can feel humans thoughts (I know some hardcore scientists would blame me for these words, but I sustain), so do not worry about that, they understand.

===

My hugs and tears to you the Human, my head bow to Spike the Cat who accomplished his mission on Earth - have a nice journey to home cloud when the Time will come!
 

keline729

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Hello to all, I am new to this site, actually new to any forum online. My name is John, and my cat's name is Spike, he's my friend, my best lil buddy, and he just threw up with some blood in the vomit. Sadly he's got FIV, which is in it's very late stages. Our vet is unavailable, being Thanksgiving, and the only 24-hour vet is some distance away, and very, very expensive.

I don't even know if going to the vet will help, he's in the very late stages of FIV, and he's got numerous conditions that have been bad and getting worse. I know what's coming, and that's why I'm here...

I live alone, except for Spike, and my only two friends are out of town for the holiday. I only have contact with two family members, one of whom doesn't like cats, and the other actually hates them. They won't come visit since they don't want to deal with stuff like the occasional cat hair in their food, or on their clothes.

Some years ago I suffered an accident, and the resulting injuries cost me almost everything, which resulted in a depression which cost me pretty much the rest. I am self-employed, doing internet-based work, so I rarely have to leave the house, so it's been just me and Spike since, and now I'm about to lose him too...

The reason I'm here today is because I really don't have anyone to talk to about this. I spend almost every day alone in a house with my only companion, who's about to leave me, and I have no one to tell how sad this makes me, or to offer any moral support, or just say 'I understand'... I've always tried to 'be strong' about things, keep a stiff upper lip, whatever, but this is just too much. I try to be cheerful and normal for his sake, because he picks up on my emotions and I don't want to stress him out, but it's getting harder and harder, and I find myself trying not cry or have an anxiety attack in the other room, meaning I'm not spending that time with him, which is so important to me right now.

I was going to go to the local Community Center today, to help with the Thanksgiving dinner, but I was afraid to leave him, and now I'm glad I didn't because of what happened. But I had also planned to try to talk to some folks there about what I'm going through, just to have a chance to talk about it, to let some of the sadness out... Not having that chance has just added to my anxiety and sadness, which when combined with this new and more severe symptom was just too much. So, that's why I'm here, today...

To all the members here, I'm sorry about my long meandering message, and that my first post should be about such an unhappy subject. Regardless of whether this post attracts any readers or comments, I'm thankful for the chance to talk about my little buddy and how much he means to me, and how sad this situation is making me, and how stressed out I am about this new symptom. I know some will say 'rush him to the vet', but at his last blood test about a month ago, his red blood cell count was horrifically low, as was his white blood cell count, and every other number of importance. The vet said the virus was 'raging through his system', and at this point all I could do was make him comfortable, and love him, which is what I'm doing, as best I can. I will of course call her first thing tomorrow morning to let her know, but as far as a panicked Uber ride to a vet's office he doesn't know, and scaring and stressing him out in his final days, I don't think that's the best thing to do, for him. Though any advice would of course be appreciated.

I would like to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving, and again, sorry for the long message...

View attachment 263225 Spike, not long after I found him in an alley...

View attachment 263224 And about a year ago, in all his glory, about age 8...
Hello to all, I am new to this site, actually new to any forum online. My name is John, and my cat's name is Spike, he's my friend, my best lil buddy, and he just threw up with some blood in the vomit. Sadly he's got FIV, which is in it's very late stages. Our vet is unavailable, being Thanksgiving, and the only 24-hour vet is some distance away, and very, very expensive.

I don't even know if going to the vet will help, he's in the very late stages of FIV, and he's got numerous conditions that have been bad and getting worse. I know what's coming, and that's why I'm here...

I live alone, except for Spike, and my only two friends are out of town for the holiday. I only have contact with two family members, one of whom doesn't like cats, and the other actually hates them. They won't come visit since they don't want to deal with stuff like the occasional cat hair in their food, or on their clothes.

Some years ago I suffered an accident, and the resulting injuries cost me almost everything, which resulted in a depression which cost me pretty much the rest. I am self-employed, doing internet-based work, so I rarely have to leave the house, so it's been just me and Spike since, and now I'm about to lose him too...

The reason I'm here today is because I really don't have anyone to talk to about this. I spend almost every day alone in a house with my only companion, who's about to leave me, and I have no one to tell how sad this makes me, or to offer any moral support, or just say 'I understand'... I've always tried to 'be strong' about things, keep a stiff upper lip, whatever, but this is just too much. I try to be cheerful and normal for his sake, because he picks up on my emotions and I don't want to stress him out, but it's getting harder and harder, and I find myself trying not cry or have an anxiety attack in the other room, meaning I'm not spending that time with him, which is so important to me right now.

I was going to go to the local Community Center today, to help with the Thanksgiving dinner, but I was afraid to leave him, and now I'm glad I didn't because of what happened. But I had also planned to try to talk to some folks there about what I'm going through, just to have a chance to talk about it, to let some of the sadness out... Not having that chance has just added to my anxiety and sadness, which when combined with this new and more severe symptom was just too much. So, that's why I'm here, today...

To all the members here, I'm sorry about my long meandering message, and that my first post should be about such an unhappy subject. Regardless of whether this post attracts any readers or comments, I'm thankful for the chance to talk about my little buddy and how much he means to me, and how sad this situation is making me, and how stressed out I am about this new symptom. I know some will say 'rush him to the vet', but at his last blood test about a month ago, his red blood cell count was horrifically low, as was his white blood cell count, and every other number of importance. The vet said the virus was 'raging through his system', and at this point all I could do was make him comfortable, and love him, which is what I'm doing, as best I can. I will of course call her first thing tomorrow morning to let her know, but as far as a panicked Uber ride to a vet's office he doesn't know, and scaring and stressing him out in his final days, I don't think that's the best thing to do, for him. Though any advice would of course be appreciated.

I would like to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving, and again, sorry for the long message...

View attachment 263225 Spike, not long after I found him in an alley...

View attachment 263224 And about a year ago, in all his glory, about age 8...
 

keline729

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Hello John and all here;

My name is Steve.

I'd like to offer some of that moral support you've asked for.

Like you, I'm facing the loss of one of my kitty's, her name is Queenie.

What was first thought to be a respiratory infection is now looking more like a cancerous tumor in one of her sinuses.

Those words her vet. spoke, "...it won't get better," keep echoing over and over in my head. All I've been able to do is try to drown them out with other thoughts.

One in particular I hope will help you is from Vicki Harrison, "Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn how to swim."

I've lived a long time and almost always had dogs and cats in my life.

I've yet to find any words, deeds or especially memories that have ever comforted me when I've lost a pet. There is only one comfort, time. That's of little help in the moment so I'll offer the next best thing, someone to exchange your thoughts with.

Keline729, 25 Nov. 2018
 

keline729

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Good days and bad days. Please don't ever let me take the good one's for granted. Please ease the pain that comes with the bad. Every evening for the past few weeks, Queenie crawls up in my lap and lays on one of her favorite blankets. She rarely did that before, now she looks forward to it. She drops off to a peaceful sleep, as do I occasionally.

Some days she breathes normally, others not so well. I'm to take her back in for check-up in a couple of weeks and wonder how she'll be then. I wonder too how I'll be. There is never any good time to lose a member of one's immediate family, but just before Christmas ?

Then there's that guilt over feeling bad from giving so much love, affection and attention to Queenie while it must seem like I'm neglecting Jackie, her little sister. I try to make up the difference and explain as best I can to Jackie that her sister is sick and to be nice to her, but I don't think she understands. Maybe that's one of the things that we should learn from our animals - to take things as they come, one day at a time. John - we are facing similar circumstances and while I would really like to be able to write something comforting, the truth is for all the time our little buddies have been with us, at least in my case, I've always ignored any thoughts about the day when they'd no longer be around. When we're forced to, it's a strain that affects everything we do. I hope you've found some small way of coping. When Queenie sleeps peacefully in my lap at night, that's about all the comfort each of us gets, and for now, it has to be enough.

Steve
 

misty8723

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Hello John. It was very hard to read your words having just lost my Swanie a month ago. But I went through a similar situation with another cat, Cynthia, who had cancer. We treated her with chemo and other things and had her for 22 months after diagnosis. But the last days were so hard, she was so bad. When the end came for her, my vet was out of town. And since it was Saturday, the backup vet who comes to your home was not available. We gave her pain medicine and let her pass on the blanket she loved. Losing someone we love is the hardest thing in the world, and I'm so very sorry you and Spike are going through this. When he does pass, watch for a sign. All three of my babies who left me sent me a sign. It will be there if you are open to it.
 

di and bob

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The number one thing to remember to have on hand for any cat that is near the end of his/her life is pain medication in the form of an injection. I learned the hard way when our vets were suddenly not available, out on an emergency. i would have sold my soul to have had one on that horrible day......to watch them suffer is shattering.
 

Mamanyt1953

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K keline729 Second opinions are always good. IF it is possible for you, I highly suggest taking her to a University in your area with a Veterinary Medical School. It will NOT be less expensive than a regular vet in most cases, and may be even more, BUT...they are practising cutting edge veterinary medicine with the latest diagnostic tools and treatment techniques. If nothing else, they may be able to significantly improve her quality of life for whatever time she has remaining. And that canNOT be undervalued!

J JohnY , You might think about this as well, if it is feasible for you.
 

Antonio65

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I was told by the vet. it can't be treated. If it can, I'd like to know how. Maybe I should seek a 2nd opinion.
Depending on the position, kind and staging of cancer, it could be treated with radiation therapy.
My cat had a carcinoma up into one of her nostrils, she was treated with radiations, she was fine for several years!
 

Maria Bayote

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Hello to all, I am new to this site, actually new to any forum online. My name is John, and my cat's name is Spike, he's my friend, my best lil buddy, and he just threw up with some blood in the vomit. Sadly he's got FIV, which is in it's very late stages. Our vet is unavailable, being Thanksgiving, and the only 24-hour vet is some distance away, and very, very expensive.

I don't even know if going to the vet will help, he's in the very late stages of FIV, and he's got numerous conditions that have been bad and getting worse. I know what's coming, and that's why I'm here...

I live alone, except for Spike, and my only two friends are out of town for the holiday. I only have contact with two family members, one of whom doesn't like cats, and the other actually hates them. They won't come visit since they don't want to deal with stuff like the occasional cat hair in their food, or on their clothes.

Some years ago I suffered an accident, and the resulting injuries cost me almost everything, which resulted in a depression which cost me pretty much the rest. I am self-employed, doing internet-based work, so I rarely have to leave the house, so it's been just me and Spike since, and now I'm about to lose him too...

The reason I'm here today is because I really don't have anyone to talk to about this. I spend almost every day alone in a house with my only companion, who's about to leave me, and I have no one to tell how sad this makes me, or to offer any moral support, or just say 'I understand'... I've always tried to 'be strong' about things, keep a stiff upper lip, whatever, but this is just too much. I try to be cheerful and normal for his sake, because he picks up on my emotions and I don't want to stress him out, but it's getting harder and harder, and I find myself trying not cry or have an anxiety attack in the other room, meaning I'm not spending that time with him, which is so important to me right now.

I was going to go to the local Community Center today, to help with the Thanksgiving dinner, but I was afraid to leave him, and now I'm glad I didn't because of what happened. But I had also planned to try to talk to some folks there about what I'm going through, just to have a chance to talk about it, to let some of the sadness out... Not having that chance has just added to my anxiety and sadness, which when combined with this new and more severe symptom was just too much. So, that's why I'm here, today...

To all the members here, I'm sorry about my long meandering message, and that my first post should be about such an unhappy subject. Regardless of whether this post attracts any readers or comments, I'm thankful for the chance to talk about my little buddy and how much he means to me, and how sad this situation is making me, and how stressed out I am about this new symptom. I know some will say 'rush him to the vet', but at his last blood test about a month ago, his red blood cell count was horrifically low, as was his white blood cell count, and every other number of importance. The vet said the virus was 'raging through his system', and at this point all I could do was make him comfortable, and love him, which is what I'm doing, as best I can. I will of course call her first thing tomorrow morning to let her know, but as far as a panicked Uber ride to a vet's office he doesn't know, and scaring and stressing him out in his final days, I don't think that's the best thing to do, for him. Though any advice would of course be appreciated.

I would like to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving, and again, sorry for the long message...

View attachment 263225 Spike, not long after I found him in an alley...

View attachment 263224 And about a year ago, in all his glory, about age 8...
Hello John, and welcome to TCS.

Please know that you are not alone in your pain or sadness. It is always difficult when a furry friend leaves us behind. No words can ever express the grief a person feels when the time comes that he/she has to let go. I have been there many times, and each time it gets more and more difficult.

I suggest that you write all about it more, talk about it more. You can even write a short story about you and Spike - how you two came together as family. There would be a lot of sniffs here and there, but at least you are trying to get them all out.

Grief will not pass. I do not believe in that. It just gets mellow in time. But in remembering our furry best friends we can smile as we have tried to give them the best life they deserve, the happy memories, the cuddles. Our furry babies, in their passing, teach us how to let go, to appreciate life, and most of all - to love unconditionally. I am writing this with tears in my eyes, as I feel your pain, and remembering those I have loved so dearly and lost.

Hang in there. Spike will never want you to be sad.
 

keline729

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K keline729 Second opinions are always good. IF it is possible for you, I highly suggest taking her to a University in your area with a Veterinary Medical School. It will NOT be less expensive than a regular vet in most cases, and may be even more, BUT...they are practising cutting edge veterinary medicine with the latest diagnostic tools and treatment techniques. If nothing else, they may be able to significantly improve her quality of life for whatever time she has remaining. And that canNOT be undervalued!

J JohnY , You might think about this as well, if it is feasible for you.
All very good suggestions. There's no teaching hospital here so I did the next best thing - I took Queenie to a critical care facility which has specialists in all disciplines, including internal medicine and oncology. I was very impressed with the internist and nurse. At no time was I given anything but positive encouragement. They did lab work and scheduled my little girl for a CT scan next week. I'm so glad I made an effort which may allow me many more years with my girl.
 

keline729

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You are a good mom!
I'm a good dad !
While I'm apprehensive about the anesthesia, I trust the internist DVM and her nurse to take good care and ease Queenie's breathing. I plan to stay at the clinic until she wakes up and we know she's alright. Fortunately I work from home so I can be with her all day Thursday to ensure she's Ok. Thanks to all who have expressed concern. I'll post a note after the CT-scan to let everyone know how things went.
Keline
 

Antonio65

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I'm a good dad !
I'd say that it is even better!
Usually it's women that are cat-oriented and emotional in this issue.
We men are much fewer :)

I'm sure everything will be fine!

Forgive my mistake, English is not my first language, I might have missed a clue in your messages ;)
 

segelkatt

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There was no way you could have known that keline79 was not female and you are correct, there are more women than men who are cat crazy although that is changing. And don't worry about not having caught a clue about that because of second language problems, there are many of us here either from another country or whose first language was not English although they were born here including me. We had a man from Finland for a while who wrote with a lovely accent, and we have people from Australia, Canada and the UK who use phrases we in the US don't know. I saw one lady from Romania I think, one of those Eastern European countries who was rescuing cats. And then there is the one who teaches school in Spain.This site is quite international, every cat lover is welcome no matter where they reside. So, welcome to you in Italy.
 
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