I Believed my Neighbor Lied about taking care of The Cats on the Block

[Whenallhellbreakslose]

First off, I like to say I am sorry for having to put up a post like this. However, with that said I am upset with a cat feeder and neighbor who I had a fallen out with months ago. I was asked by her husband at that time to look for help in getting some of the cats off the streets. I did that and wanted to get the most friendly cats off that streets (who this feeder and a former feeder who moved away took care of). I told this lady plenty of times prior to the fallen out that we should get these cats off the streets (a number of them are friendly and I worry how they would fare out in the winter) These cats were being bullied by bigger cats in her backyard, and I had my own b.y. crew who are territorial, so there was no way they could integrate into that group. I feed these cats mostly in the evening (sometimes I give them a snack in the afternoon). Since they didn't bother me in morning, I assumed they were still being fed by her. Someone had to be feeding them, so I thought they were being taken care of.

This lady had been lying to me about a number of things. When I told her, I was feeding these cats she would act surprised, " Oh, your feeding them. I didn't know." Funny thing, she said that everytime I mentioned they came to me for food. She also lied about the big bully cats and said they never leave her yard. That was a totally lie! These cats always raids my feedings and make it difficult to feed the other cats. Anyway, when I went out of my way to look for help at the husband's request months ago she went berserk and wrote the nastiest email to me. I gave it back to her spotlighting all her lies and head games. She then called me crazy for wanting to get the friendly cats off the streets and said she would contact her lawyer if I spoke to her again. SMH at this nonsese.

Instead of her lawyer, she sic a tnr group who greatly helped tnr the cats on the block a few years earlier (I caught a bunch for tnr as well). The TNR group were totally on her side and didn't want to hear anything I had to say(totally unfair by the way). They scolded me for looking for help to get the cats off the street. Then told me to just focus on my b.y. cats and shoo these cats back to the other feeder (sorry, that doesn't work). Also, now this is what I want to really drive home, that they said the feeder told them that she HAS winter shelters for them and I shouldn't worry about them anymore.

Fast forward to today, the day of a nasty blizzard where their will be close to a foot of snow dropped by tomorrow afternoon. The cats (not all) came to me before 3pm and I gave them a large serving of food and if I saw them later I would have fed them again (hoping that the snow didn't pick up). Things were quiet as the snow came down and I thought they were hunkering down in there shelters in the other feeder's backyard. I opened the door and one of the friendly cats nearly ran into my house. He wanted in so badly. My heart sank as I seen the other cats outside in the blizzard. I tried to feed them, they ate and then got spooked by the wind. One of them came back and finished his meal. I don't know where they went, but if she has shelters in her yard for them--wouldn't they be IN those shelters. I don't live right next door to this lady so it is not like that. Shame on her for lying to me and tnr people. I have been weighed down with so many problems in addition to a very troubling situation that I have been very preoccuppied by (i was off the site for a while because of all that.)

Anyway, to say I am livid with this woman is putting it mildly. Cats are going to suffer because she lied to me and the tnr group. Shame on her!!! I made shelters for my backyard crew and wanted to make extra emergency shelters to be on the safe side(but ran out of material and did not have the money to buy anything at that time, and then the great avalanche of troubles happened. I am mad at myself, I wish I wasn't so distracted and weighed down. Ugggghhhhh!!!

Any advice on this situation would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. Once again, I am sorry to have to put up a post like this.

 

[Caspers Human]

If those cats are feral or abandoned animals then nobody owns them. Right?

Since nobody owns those cats, if a person trapped one or more of them and made sure that they got adopted to good homes, there isn't anything that anybody else can say or do about it. Right?

If you talk to somebody and try to be nice to them but they aren't nice to you, it only makes sense to stop talking to them. Right?

Do you understand what I'm saying?

 

[Whenallhellbreakslose]

If those cats are feral or abandoned animals then nobody owns them. Right?

Since nobody owns those cats, if a person trapped one or more of them and made sure that they got adopted to good homes, there isn't anything that anybody else can say or do about it. Right?

If you talk to somebody and try to be nice to them but they aren't nice to you, it only makes sense to stop talking to them. Right?

Do you understand what I'm saying?

It's not that simple. The owner of the house I live in, doesn't want me to take any outdoor cat in. I am on thin ice for even feeding outdoor cats. If I could take these cats in, I would in a heartbeat. I don't care what this neighbor thinks. The friendly ones should be given a chance to get off the streets. This woman doesn't own them. I have contacted numberous rescue organizations and it is the same practically everywhere, they are not doing much rescuing due to the Covid 19 lockdowns. Also, I know it is not easy getting adult cats who have been on the streets adopted. I can't do much in regards to that right now

I seen a few cats out in the last few hours. I hope that I am wrong about this(shelter situation), but when cats are coming to you in heavy snow and one nearly runs into your house to get away from it--what am I suppose to believe?

Anyway, thanks for your reply, I have to figure some things out.

 

[fionasmom]

All I can say is that I am sorry that this situation has not resolved itself. Yes, I have known of people who claimed to be taking care of animals just to put someone else off the scent. Can anyone who know check to see if she has shelters? It could be hard depending on the layout of her property.

 

[Whenallhellbreakslose]

All I can say is that I am sorry that this situation has not resolved itself. Yes, I have known of people who claimed to be taking care of animals just to put someone else off the scent. Can anyone who know check to see if she has shelters? It could be hard depending on the layout of her property.

Yes, I am very annoyed that this is still ongoing. This was what I was trying to avoid by attempting to help her husband (the animal sanctuary situation) back over 2 months ago. She turned those tnr people on me and made me look like the bad guy. If this lady can't handle the situation, she should of asked for help.

I think she may have emergency shelters in her yard (she feeds easily over 15 cats), but these cats I have been feeding may be getting chased out of her yard. I told her monthes ago I see a problem with this and how these cats may not fare out well. I think she may have hoarding issues or at least too much pride to admit she needs help. These cats seem to get a feeding in the morning somewhere and i didn't seem them around when it rained hard outside. Not one of them comes to me with a cold, so i thought maybe she has things under control and then yesterday happened and now I am back to being worried over the cats.

I have been going through a lot lately, so I have been very distracted. I am going to have to see if I can get the money together to buy more materials for emergency shelters. I think she may have the shelters, but the cats are being bullied out of her yard. I will be investigating. I really want nothing to do with this lady (she has shown her true colors) . I was very nice to her for the sake of the cats and she got all nasty on me. Shame on her!!!

Anyway, thank you for your reply. I seen a few of them out there earlier. I will be looking for the rest.
Hope they are all accounted for.

 

[CatladyJan]

It's not that simple. The owner of the house I live in, doesn't want me to take any outdoor cat in. I am on thin ice for even feeding outdoor cats. If I could take these cats in, I would in a heartbeat. I don't care what this neighbor thinks. The friendly ones should be given a chance to get off the streets. This woman doesn't own them. I have contacted numberous rescue organizations and it is the same practically everywhere, they are not doing much rescuing due to the Covid 19 lockdowns. Also, I know it is not easy getting adult cats who have been on the streets adopted. I can't do much in regards to that right now

I seen a few cats out in the last few hours. I hope that I am wrong about this(shelter situation), but when cats are coming to you in heavy snow and one nearly runs into your house to get away from it--what am I suppose to believe?

Anyway, thanks for your reply, I have to figure some things out.

So you are renting a house and the landlord doesn't want any of these cats brought in. Your neighbor may be partially taking care of those cats, but they are looking for a really warm place. Near me there are a couple of feral cat groups on FB and they have been making shelters like crazy and giving them to whomever needs them. Try searching FB for some groups close to you.

So, sorry you are having to deal with this I can imagine how painful it must be.

 

[Whenallhellbreakslose]

Thank you CatladyJan she doesn't want me putting cat shelters around her property (she only allow it for the backyard kitties since they have been around for awhile.) The b.y kitties are territorially, so no way I can sneak the other kitties in the back. I will try to make extra shelters, but things are complicated. I just saw 5 of them this evening and fed them (including the one who wanted to run into my house). They seem okay. I just don't know why they don't remain in her yard if she has all the shelters she claims. Doesn't give me much confidence.

Well, anyway. I have to log off for the night. Thanks for your reply. I appreciate it.

 

[Whenallhellbreakslose]

Update: Nearly all the cats were fed by me at some point. Some of them didn't come back to me until a few days after the snow storm. The bullies have not been back, but a new male cat has crashed my feedings (not a nice cat). I will see if I can shoo him back to his feeder. He looks well feed, so he must have one.

Anyway, I just thought I leave this update. I am still not sure if the neighbor/feeder is feeding the cats that come to me much. They come to me pretty hungry at times. I think she may have shelters, but I think the bully cats probably make it difficult on these cats. I can tell you it is very difficult feeding these cats when the bullies come around, they don't leave even after the they are finished. Instead they stand guard over the bowls, so the other cats can't get to them.

I wish this lady would have acknowledged that she can't handle taking care of all the cats. I would have been sympathetic. Instead she wrote vicious emails and turned people on me which accomplishes nothing! The cats suffer in the end! SMH.

 

[Whenallhellbreakslose]

UGH! Some of these cats have been coming to me 10pm at night looking for food. Last night was in the the low 20's (but felt like it was in the teens). I have been giving these cats extra feedings because of the cold. My hands are tied over the shelter due to reasons listed earlier in this thread.

I am still very ticked off at the other feeder. Regardless, if there are bully cats she should have shelters for them or ask for help. I have emails from her saying she has plenty of shelters in her backyard for all the cats she claims to feed. In addition to the email the tnr group sent me claiming the same thing (and telling me to just focus on my b.y. kitties).

Sorry, I don't mean to rehash things, but still very worried over the kitties. I am going to plea with the owner of the house to see if she gives in to placing shelters around the house. Also, I have to try to get money together for materials.

Wish me luck!!!

 

[Whenallhellbreakslose]

Once again this mystery brown cat snuck into my feeding session. It's funny when the big black cat bullies are not around this guy sneaks in. This is the third time in the last 2 weeks.

What are your experiences with party crashers and bully cats who gets in the way of your regulars being feed? Maybe there is a better way to deal with them. I am open to ideas.

 

[fionasmom]

I have a couple right now who come irregularly and I make a point not to put out food if I don't see my regulars...meaning I feed at 5 AM as that is when my ferals have always been fed, but if they are late, I don't put out the food in expectation of them. One very large male is insistent but if he does not see the food will usually leave. I have put out only some dry food for him if I feel sorry for him; it is not what he wants and while he will take a few bites it is the wet food he is after. Sometimes the decoy bowl works and sometimes it would be a bad idea.

 

[Whenallhellbreakslose]

That's what I do- - not put out the cat food if the regulars are not around. If the party crashers/bullies come, I try to give them dry food with water. However, if the regulars are around, the bully's usually take over their bowels because wet food is in it. I have delayed feedings when I see those cats waiting for the bowls to be put down. It has worked a few times, but I can't do that now because of winter.

Whenever, I successfully fed just the regulars, the bullies would get testy and starts fights with them. I wish I had a new place to feed, but I think the bullies will follow the regulars and back to square one.

It is like walking a tightrope with these cats. All I can say is I can't handle anymore if my neighbor's other cats start coming to me--I am at critical mass. All these cats want extra feedings because of the cold weather. It can be very draining all around.


Thanks for your reply. I appreciate it.