How to help a cat be a cat?

KieranKD

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Hi! So basically, I have this 8 year old cat who for the past 7 1/2 years has been living with my mom. My mom has no cat furniture or toys, and actively takes away their toys when they're playing because they're "annoying". She doesn't really let them do anything since them being cats = being cats on inappropriate places, and she says they don't use appropriate places when they do have them (she's had 3 cat trees in 16 years, 1 waas actively used and never replaced, the other 2 were sitting for a couple of months without use before being tossed).

Anyway, I finally have the family cat that was "mine" as a preteen. He doesn't use any cat furniture, boxes, anything. All he does is sleep on the bed (he's been to the vet and is now on meds; they've helped but he's still very.... not cat-y). I bought him one of those box/scratcher hybrids, toys, tunnels, the only things he's interested in is the cat grass and teaser toys. He doesn't use his scratching posts and instead tries to use the bed. I found a cat tree that he didn't use, but it was really wobbly, I've got another, less wobbly cat tree that I'm going to bring in within the week but I already know he's going to have minimal interest in it.

I feed him on the cat furniture in hopes maybe he will like it, but he only gets on it to eat and then goes back to sleep on his spot in the bed. He likes looking out the window, but is terrified of it because my mom punishes her cats for doing that. He hasn't wanted to be in the window in some weeks, because he still thinks he's going to get in trouble. I honestly think this is why he doesn't use cat furniture too, because they had no appropriate places to be cats whenever they'd climb or scratch (counters, couches, beds, etc) they'd get punished.

Long story short...... I guess I'm just exasperated? The medication has made him want to be more active but he still seems to actively avoid and even dislike all boxes/cat furniture. I'm not even really sure what my question is, I guess this is a long winded way of asking how can I encouraged him to use his cat scratchers,trees, and play boxes? How can I encourage him to be more cat-y and have fun and enjoy life?

I'm not a cat person at all, I dont' really know much to try to help him explore and play. I play with him with teaser toys (it's the only kind he'll play with that I've found) but he often gets bored with playing with just them. The only things I've really tried is catnip and food, and trying to lure him to use furniture with that.
 

susanm9006

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An eight year old cat isn’t going change his behavior overnight and will probably never act like a kitten regardless of the environment. I am not sure how long he has been with you but I would expect it to take him months before he fully relaxes in his new surroundings. Even if his previous environment wasn’t the best it was still all he knew and he surely misses it and if he was with other cats he may be missing them as well.

He may have never played much and as he is older, may never be interested in toys that you offer. I wouldnt buy him big toys but start with things like catnip toys, cat springs , balls and mice. Scatter them around where he sleeps, on the cat tree and by the window. He just may find one or two that appeals to him. I would feed him on the floor or wherever his permanent food and water location will be and set out a few cat treats like temptations or dried chicken treats on the cat tree and near the window just so he can begin to have some positive associations with those places.

That you took him in to be checked out by your vet is great. Knowing that he is healthy should give you some peace of mind and hopefully with time and patience he may liven up and enjoy his new home more.
 
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suzeanna

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Laser pointer can be a fun toy! Feeding, treats, and positive reinforcement when he plays or hangs out in the area work well. My cat (also 8 years old, adopted a year ago) only uses her cat tree for a few hours each week, which is fine. For the scratching post, make sure you have a pretty solid unwobbly one and reward him (positive verbal reinforcement, pets if he likes them, and a kibble) every time he uses it.

My cat's favorite toy is this teaser (FRISCO Bird Teaser with Feathers Cat Toy, Blue - Chewy.com) and she's never met a moppy ball she didn't want to destroy. Ping pong balls across the wooden floor are a new discovery, too. Floor surfaces can be a factor, too -- mine prefers rolling around and playing on an Ikea carpet that we have in the living room, not so much on the hard floors.
 

vince

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Ping pong balls are my go-to toys for a first toy. They're cheap and make an enticing noise. You can also put one in the bathtub for kitty. Another cheap thrill is one of those crinkly ball toys that aren't much more than a buck at the pet store. You might also try a piece of paper tied on the end of a string and pulled for a pursuit toy or tied around a doorknob. Also, a kicker made of a pair of old sweat socks one inside another and tied in a knot is a good toy.

The big thing is to find something kitty likes without spending a lot. Once you find what interests him, you can expand on that.

Positive reinforcement of desired behaviors with treats as suggested above is a good idea. Cats often follow a catch-eat-sleep sequence, so if you play later at night, then give kitty a treat or a meal, it often assures a quiet night's sleep for both of you.
 

rubysmama

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How can I encourage him to be more cat-y and have fun and enjoy life?

[snip]

I'm not a cat person at all, I dont' really know much to try to help him explore and play.
Since you're not a cat person, it could be that you're not sure what to expect from an 8 year old cat, and that as far as he's concerned, he's being totally cat-y and is purrfectly content.

Plus, at that age, he's likely to sleep most of the day.

Per petmd.com:
"Cats sleep an average of fifteen hours a day, and some can sleep up to twenty hours in a twenty-four hour period."

But if you think he's not quite adjusted to your place, here's a TCS article that might be helpful:
How To Help A New Cat Adjust To Your Home – TheCatSite Articles

Plus a couple on toys:
How To Choose The Best Toy For Your Cat – TheCatSite Articles
17 Best Toys For Lazy Cats – TheCatSite Articles

Plus:
Bored Cat? What Cat Owners Need To Know (including 10 Actionable Tips) – TheCatSite Articles
 

neely

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I agree with the above members that time and patience are the key. More than anything you have to build trust in your cat. I think once he sees you as someone who cares about him, feeds him and loves him hopefully he will start to come out of his shell. :catlove:
Here's another Article with toy suggestions to try: 8 Superb Automated Cat Toys That You’re Going To Love! – TheCatSite Articles

BTW, what's his name? Best of luck, please keep us posted on his progress. :crossfingers:
 
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KieranKD

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Thank you for all of the suggestions; his name is Pepe and he was a family cat but he was "mine" in the sense I was his favorite. I was 16 when they got him and later in life, had 2 senior dogs (just 1 now) both with financially draining medical issues and could not really afford to help him. He officially started living with me in August, he honestly looked really bad. He was very very bald from fleas & overgrooming, having seizures, and a few pounds underweight. He looks so much better already, almost all of his hair is back and me and the vets have found a medication that has really helped him feel good and stop the seizures.

I think all of you are right that it will just take time for him to act more normal; it's hard to describe why he's "not normal" and not just old, just that I can see a clear difference between how much more normal medication has made him, but I think he's still really scared to do cat things because he thinks he's going to get in trouble and he's pretty jumpy when I catch him doing cat things despite being buddy buddy otherwise.

That being said, literally the night I posted this this dude hit one of his first 3 AM silly hours and started playing with things he's never touched before. So yeah, thank you, I'm sure with time and some reinforcement he'll start being more "normal"
 

Willowy

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Yeah, cats know that different people want different things, and some can be trusted more than others. It just takes a while for them to feel things out. So give him some time, he'll come out of his shell.

Seizure meds can also have a sedating effect, at least until his body gets used to them. So I'm sure that's a factor too.
 
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KieranKD

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Seizure meds can also have a sedating effect, at least until his body gets used to them. So I'm sure that's a factor too.
Yeah, my senior dog is also on seizure meds and they affected her pretty badly while she got used to them. I've not seen that in Pepe though, I figure he felt really shit before because if anything the medication has made him much more active. The more I watch him the more I do really think he's just scared he's going to get in trouble for using the cat tree/window/etc, but I hope he will come out of that with time.
 

daftcat75

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Back when Krista was still with me, she knew which scratching posts were the best--sturdy, solid, plenty of height for her to stretch herself out. She would cross a room for one of those. Toss the wobbly one. He's probably opting for the bed because the tree isn't sturdy enough for him to really "go to town on."
:climbcat:
 

walli

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Give your cat lots of love, I'm thinking it will take time for his personality to come out.
If it doesn't at least he gets loved!
 

__caitlin

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Just like humans, it can take a long time to recover from an abusive or painful environment even when you're no longer in that environment. We've had a few cats with various types of trauma (one with an eating disorder from starvation conditions, another that had trouble socializing and trusting people due to being forcibly isolated).

While there are some aspects of their personalities that might not change -- e.g., the eating disorder cat is still obsessed with food, and the other one is still a little distant sometimes -- don't give up hope, because most creatures really do recover once their minds and bodies are able to process that they're in a healthy, safe space. It seems like you're doing all the right things; give him time (i.e. months and months) and a lot of love and he will gradually realize he is safe :)

And yes, definitely experiment with different (good quality) cat furniture! I have some cats that don't prefer cat trees because they like tunnels and hidey holes, while other cats won't go into any enclosed space and exclusively prefer to perch. (And even more cats that just prefer cardboard boxes to any of those options.) You and him are both learning his preferences together!
 

Father of furbabies

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I only have a small suggestion about the cat tree /scratching posts. Show him how to use it. I had to show my two furkids how to use the tree. What I would do when I had their attention is to actually scratch my fingernails on the scratching part which would make them curious. I did that a few times and it clicked with them. Right now I have an almost 6 foot pole attached to the side of my computer desk and the two of them act like it is a stripper pole as they race up and spin around on it to land on my desk..

Shade and scratching post
Noka and scratching post
 

sailon

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Hi! So basically, I have this 8 year old cat who for the past 7 1/2 years has been living with my mom. My mom has no cat furniture or toys, and actively takes away their toys when they're playing because they're "annoying". She doesn't really let them do anything since them being cats = being cats on inappropriate places, and she says they don't use appropriate places when they do have them (she's had 3 cat trees in 16 years, 1 waas actively used and never replaced, the other 2 were sitting for a couple of months without use before being tossed).

Anyway, I finally have the family cat that was "mine" as a preteen. He doesn't use any cat furniture, boxes, anything. All he does is sleep on the bed (he's been to the vet and is now on meds; they've helped but he's still very.... not cat-y). I bought him one of those box/scratcher hybrids, toys, tunnels, the only things he's interested in is the cat grass and teaser toys. He doesn't use his scratching posts and instead tries to use the bed. I found a cat tree that he didn't use, but it was really wobbly, I've got another, less wobbly cat tree that I'm going to bring in within the week but I already know he's going to have minimal interest in it.

I feed him on the cat furniture in hopes maybe he will like it, but he only gets on it to eat and then goes back to sleep on his spot in the bed. He likes looking out the window, but is terrified of it because my mom punishes her cats for doing that. He hasn't wanted to be in the window in some weeks, because he still thinks he's going to get in trouble. I honestly think this is why he doesn't use cat furniture too, because they had no appropriate places to be cats whenever they'd climb or scratch (counters, couches, beds, etc) they'd get punished.

Long story short...... I guess I'm just exasperated? The medication has made him want to be more active but he still seems to actively avoid and even dislike all boxes/cat furniture. I'm not even really sure what my question is, I guess this is a long winded way of asking how can I encouraged him to use his cat scratchers,trees, and play boxes? How can I encourage him to be more cat-y and have fun and enjoy life?

I'm not a cat person at all, I dont' really know much to try to help him explore and play. I play with him with teaser toys (it's the only kind he'll play with that I've found) but he often gets bored with playing with just them. The only things I've really tried is catnip and food, and trying to lure him to use furniture with that.
Honestly, he DOES sound like he's being very cat-like; being contrary and living life on his terms. Almost the definition of a cat.
 

Meowmee

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Hi! So basically, I have this 8 year old cat who for the past 7 1/2 years has been living with my mom. My mom has no cat furniture or toys, and actively takes away their toys when they're playing because they're "annoying". She doesn't really let them do anything since them being cats = being cats on inappropriate places, and she says they don't use appropriate places when they do have them (she's had 3 cat trees in 16 years, 1 waas actively used and never replaced, the other 2 were sitting for a couple of months without use before being tossed).

Anyway, I finally have the family cat that was "mine" as a preteen. He doesn't use any cat furniture, boxes, anything. All he does is sleep on the bed (he's been to the vet and is now on meds; they've helped but he's still very.... not cat-y). I bought him one of those box/scratcher hybrids, toys, tunnels, the only things he's interested in is the cat grass and teaser toys. He doesn't use his scratching posts and instead tries to use the bed. I found a cat tree that he didn't use, but it was really wobbly, I've got another, less wobbly cat tree that I'm going to bring in within the week but I already know he's going to have minimal interest in it.

I feed him on the cat furniture in hopes maybe he will like it, but he only gets on it to eat and then goes back to sleep on his spot in the bed. He likes looking out the window, but is terrified of it because my mom punishes her cats for doing that. He hasn't wanted to be in the window in some weeks, because he still thinks he's going to get in trouble. I honestly think this is why he doesn't use cat furniture too, because they had no appropriate places to be cats whenever they'd climb or scratch (counters, couches, beds, etc) they'd get punished.

Long story short...... I guess I'm just exasperated? The medication has made him want to be more active but he still seems to actively avoid and even dislike all boxes/cat furniture. I'm not even really sure what my question is, I guess this is a long winded way of asking how can I encouraged him to use his cat scratchers,trees, and play boxes? How can I encourage him to be more cat-y and have fun and enjoy life?

I'm not a cat person at all, I dont' really know much to try to help him explore and play. I play with him with teaser toys (it's the only kind he'll play with that I've found) but he often gets bored with playing with just them. The only things I've really tried is catnip and food, and trying to lure him to use furniture with that.
Get some wand toys, catnip and balls etc, paper bags, boxes, mice toys and spend time each day playing with him. He us older and may not be as active or playful. Try the cardboard scratchers as well.. cats pretty much decide where they want to sleep and what to do. It’s gonna take him time to recover from what you’ve described, he probably will become more comfortable looking out the window and all those other things in time. Is he used to having a cat companion? You might want to get him another cat to hang out with as well if you can. Play music and purrli for him, tv shows he may like etc.
 
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