Help! Loving cat meows outside our bedroom door at night, can't find a way to make him stop.

docdaddy

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Very loving cat, loves to be with us. Problem is, at night, he sits outside our bedroom door a couple of times a night and meows and meows, wanting to come in. We are not getting our needed sleep! We play with him all day, we have another cat he likes playing with, we give him a lot of attention at night before we go to bed. We now have a water sprayer and at 3 am when he wakes us up meowing outside our door we spray him with water and he runs away- hoping he learns the only thing that happens when he howls outside the bedroom door in the middle of the night the only thing that happens is water spray in the face. But he'll be back a couple of hours later, yowling outside the bedroom door. This is driving us crazy! We're considering adding something to the water he'll hate to make him stop, but we need help! Thanks.
 
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docdaddy

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Thanks, I just assumed that using associative approaches (I meow at the door, that results in a spray of water in the face that I don't like) would work. It would work with me! Lol. I ordered da Bird as mentioned in the behavioral article, and will try the approach they suggest.
 

vball91

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When we first got Aria, we tried to keep her out of the bedroom at night. She would cry at the door and butt her head on the door, and you could see her little paws trying to get under the door. It was cute and pathethic at the same time. Everybody said ignore it and she will stop. Well, six months later, she still was the same, so we just let her in to sleep with us. It's been peaceful ever since.
 
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docdaddy

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We've tried letting him sleep in the room with us but he wants to crawl all over us and rub on our faces in the middle of the night.
 

rad65

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We've tried letting him sleep in the room with us but he wants to crawl all over us and rub on our faces in the middle of the night.
Funny enough, I have woken up in the middle of the night to one of my cats rubbing his head on my hand, trying to get me to pet him while I'm asleep. It does get better, though. Now my cats just plop on my bed 5 minutes after I do and are asleep almost instantly, now that they realize that I'm asleep and not in the mood to play 
. Regardless, you should try to get a good play session in with your cat pretty soon before you go to bed. That should tucker him out enough to get him to go to sleep, or at least take the spring out of his step so he stops meowing at your door all night.
 
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docdaddy

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Funny enough, I have woken up in the middle of the night to one of my cats rubbing his head on my hand, trying to get me to pet him while I'm asleep. It does get better, though. Now my cats just plop on my bed 5 minutes after I do and are asleep almost instantly, now that they realize that I'm asleep and not in the mood to play 
. Regardless, you should try to get a good play session in with your cat pretty soon before you go to bed. That should tucker him out enough to get him to go to sleep, or at least take the spring out of his step so he stops meowing at your door all night.
Yeah, we ordered da Bird and until it arrives we've been using a laser pointer and letting him chase that around later in the evening. Only a couple of days, but he's gotten a little better (not howling at the door until about 4:30 AM as opposed to 2 AM, 3 AM, 4 AM,etc.) 
 

harleydiva

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Yeah, we ordered da Bird and until it arrives we've been using a laser pointer and letting him chase that around later in the evening. Only a couple of days, but he's gotten a little better (not howling at the door until about 4:30 AM as opposed to 2 AM, 3 AM, 4 AM,etc.)
My Siamese sleeps in the bed, and the other two sleep on a cat tree in the bedroom.  Occasionally I wake up and find all three on the bed.  They only bother me if I get up to go to the bathroom, then settle down again.  Siamese boy usually crawls under the covers if I get up, and will still be there in the morning.
 
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docdaddy

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I wanted to come back and thank people for their help. After a couple of months of misery and no sleep, try to squirt the cat to discourage him from yowling outside our bedroom door all night. to no avail, we took the advice linked in here. We purchased Da Bird, which Dexter (the cat) loves, and he treats it like chasing a real bird. Never seen him go after a toy like that. We play with it an hour or so before lights out, let him "catch" it, and he mouths it for a while. Within a couple of nights of that, he stopped the yowling in the middle of the night. He still might do it for a night if we've been out of town for a couple of days, but he is MUCH better behaved. Thanks to all here! I've always trained our dogs and thus tried to use the same behavior process on the cats, would have never thought of this approach!
 

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Isn't it amazing how cats are so different to train? All you have to do, in the end, is make them think is it THEIR idea.  I am happy the methods worked.  With 49,000 members over 13 years, you have a good chance of outsmarting most cats.

Now, how about posting some pictures of Dexter?  We would love to see them.
 
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docdaddy

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OK - now we need more help! While our cat no longer wakes us up at 2 AM, he has decided he does want to stand outside our door and claw at the door and yowl earlier than we want to get up. Typically right at around 5 AM. And he is relentless - he will keep yowling until we open the door, even if we don't open it for a couple of hours!

So how do we make him stay away from the door at 5 AM? The play with the Da Bird, etc. has got him not howling at 2 AM,but 5 AM is unacceptable, and it is now EVERY morning!
 

harleydiva

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I would try doing the playtime with Da Bird toy.....and then leaving your bedroom door open.  He will sleep most of the night after the playtime.  I'm betting he wakes up and he's lonely.  One of my guys would try to rub on me in the middle of the night.....I would just keep my eyes closed and put my hands under the covers and he would settle down.  All three now wait for me to move and open my eyes in the morning, no matter what time it is.  If I sleep later....I may open my eyes to see them all staring at me....but they don't bother me.
 
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docdaddy

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I would try doing the playtime with Da Bird toy.....and then leaving your bedroom door open.  He will sleep most of the night after the playtime.  I'm betting he wakes up and he's lonely.  One of my guys would try to rub on me in the middle of the night.....I would just keep my eyes closed and put my hands under the covers and he would settle down.  All three now wait for me to move and open my eyes in the morning, no matter what time it is.  If I sleep later....I may open my eyes to see them all staring at me....but they don't bother me.
We've tried that but two problems: one,he wants to be literally in your face. You move him, he slowly crawls back and is in your face again, and that keeps waking us up.

The other problem is that, when we leave the door open, the other two pets ( a dog and another cat) decide they need to sleep on the bed also, and suddenly we can't move because the bed is covered with animals!

We know he just wants to be with us - he is extremely clingy to us. But we just can't have him waking us up every morning so early. I hate the thought of locking him up in some room all night.
 

licoricecat

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My cat does the same ans is driving me crazy and getting me in trouble with neighbors.  I DO NOT KNOW WHAT to do other than let her in to sleep on bed/ She is lonely to be with me so to bring some sanity and sleep to my life...I let hher in/ I had her closed in bathriroom with her food, toys and kitter and she meows all night and when i open the door she sleeps on my bed and sriops
 

gretta34

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We have this same problem.  It's horrible!  Our male cat can't sleep in bed with us because he'll pee on us...nice, right?  To be so loved.  We also have a baby on the way in about 3 weeks.  Every book I'm reading says get much needed rest now, but my cat has different ideas.  Our room used to be upstairs, and now we're on the same floor as the cats.  He is SO loud and relentless.  I put up a baby gate so that he couldn't enter the hall but we can still hear him loud and clear.  If anyone has any suggestions, this exhausted mama to be sure would appreciate it.  If he wakes up the baby all night, I'm pretty sure my husband will throw him outside, and he's 12, declawed, and has a bum knee :(  I don't want to see that happen.

Thanks!
 

mephisto14

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We live in a tropical area and want the bedroom door closed because of air conditioning costs. If we leave cats outside bedroom they scratch the door and meow. We can't sleep. If we let them in they want to go out and we can't sleep.
 

things143

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My new kitten is doing the same thing (bedroom is off limits for an allergy free safe zone), as well pawing aggressively at the door. So far what seems to working best is to play chase games with him before bed so that he gets attention and tires out and also completely ignoring him if he does meow. (Ignoring the meows is important, if you give in or let them in sometimes, they will think they just have to meow longer and harder to get their way and you will have to start all over again)
For the door pawing we turn on a small floor box fan outside our door so that's its blowing across, he doesn't like to stand in front of the air and seems to understand fan on is bed time for us.
So far this has been working for when we go to bed, but if we get up in the middle of the night and he catches us we have to endure meowing for 15-20 mins, hopefully with continued ignoring he will get over it!
 

alienrobot

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Good idea with the fan in front of the door. I was thinking of buying one of those annoying motion activated Christmas or Halloween gags but of course then I would have to hear that!
 
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