Help...I've created a monster!

[misty8723]

Kind of a long story, but a long time ago with different cats I started feeding them where they were, not making them come to the food (wet food). That worked out well, but some time after we lost Swanie, Cricket decided she wanted to be a social eater. It didn't start out too bad, I would just hang out with her while she ate her dry food in the evening. I thought maybe she was missing Swanie, as we all were. Then she started wanting to go in the bedroom to eat. Okay, no problem, I'd go in and sit with her. But it's escalated, and this is the typical pattern now. She comes into our bedroom sometime between 5 - 6 AM, stands by the side of the bed and starts meowing. It is like Meow (long pause) Meow (long pause) until I wake up. If I ignore her, she just keeps on and will sometimes jump up on the nightstand to get closer to my ear. I get up and open some wet food, but if I want to go back to bed I have to go into the guest room where she joins me. Most of the time I just stay up.

Sometime around mid morning she'll come around and start meowing. Same deal, stare at me and meow. If I stand up, she heads for the dining room where i keep the food expecting me to follow, which I do. I'll open a pouch of food and then try to find where she's decided she wants to eat. Typically, once I put thfe food down, she'll head to another place. She might do that 3 or 4 times. And it's best if I hang out with her while she eats it. Today was a new one, long drawn out meows, so I knew she wanted something. Gave her a couple treats, tried just petting her, nope. She kind of led me upstairs, and I put a little dry food in her dish...nope...so back downstairs, where I opened a pouch of food. She gave that a lick or two, but that wasn't it either. Finally, I opened a different flavor and that did the trick. But we had to try several different spots until she found where she wanted to eat.

Nighttime when I'm ready for bed, she's waiting for me in the doorway to the guest bedroom. I have bring the dish of dry food in there and sit with her while she eats a little bit, then I go crawl into my own bed. Maybe 10 minutes later we start with the meow meow meow. I have to get up, take the dish back into the bedroom, let her eat a bit (usually on the bed), and then brush her and hang out for a while. She'll go back to the dish two or three times. If I go back to my own bed, she'll start all over maybe 10 or 15 minutes later. She's usually happy if I stay in there with her and she'll curl up on her window box. I would sleep in there, but hubby starts hollering for me, and he don't quit either! It's very tiring.

So, any idea why she's started this pattern? I love her so I accommodate her, but it gets tiring. Is this her version of tortatude?

 

[ArtNJ]

Cats can develop rituals around feeding time. I don't think they have to mean anything at all. I had a cat that needed to hear and see the food go into the dish or wouldn't eat for a bit. More recently, I had a cat that immediately wanted to go into the sun room after the food was put down, come out almost immediately, and only then eat.

As you are aware, you helped these rituals develop by accommodating them. I recommend breaking them cold turkey. Just put the food down where you want it, and ignore any protests. Cat might hunger strike for a day or so, but will eat when hungry enough. Could be a very annoying week, or several, but it will get the job done. If you can't break it cold turkey, I guess you'll have to try try rolling it back to some level of accomodation, but I'm not sure how much that will help.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

OK...I'm laughing hysterically while totally commiserating with you. Take a peek at my avatar, and at the banner at the bottom of my post, and you'll see why! Now, I know a lot of laid-back torties, but I don't have one of them. And she's particular about feeding, as well. Not as bad as yours, but she is. A ArtNJ is right. You'll have to do this cold turkey, and not give in, NO MATTER WHAT! And I mean that "no matter what." I have feigned sleep through having a paw stuck in my mouth and my cheek jerked! Repeatedly. And you're in it for the long haul...at least 2-3 weeks. But it can be done.

 

[misty8723]

OK...I'm laughing hysterically while totally commiserating with you. Take a peek at my avatar, and at the banner at the bottom of my post, and you'll see why! Now, I know a lot of laid-back torties, but I don't have one of them. And she's particular about feeding, as well. Not as bad as yours, but she is. A ArtNJ is right. You'll have to do this cold turkey, and not give in, NO MATTER WHAT! And I mean that "no matter what." I have feigned sleep through having a paw stuck in my mouth and my cheek jerked! Repeatedly. And you're in it for the long haul...at least 2-3 weeks. But it can be done.

I'm laughing now too! I doubt I could ever do it cold turkey, I remember what it was like when she first came here trying to get her to eat ANY wet food. Sometimes at least in the morning I think it's more about attention than food. I've gotten up and gone into the other bed occasionally without feeding her and she comes in and gets on her box and she's fine. But sometimes in the evening I'm tired and just want to relax and watch a little tv....

 

[misty8723]

Cats can develop rituals around feeding time. I don't think they have to mean anything at all. I had a cat that needed to hear and see the food go into the dish or wouldn't eat for a bit. More recently, I had a cat that immediately wanted to go into the sun room after the food was put down, come out almost immediately, and only then eat.

As you are aware, you helped these rituals develop by accommodating them. I recommend breaking them cold turkey. Just put the food down where you want it, and ignore any protests. Cat might hunger strike for a day or so, but will eat when hungry enough. Could be a very annoying week, or several, but it will get the job done. If you can't break it cold turkey, I guess you'll have to try try rolling it back to some level of accomodation, but I'm not sure how much that will help.

Oh I definitely helped create the monster. I'm not sure about the eat when hungry, and I had a really, really hard time getting her to eat any wet food. Was told by the rescue she would never eat wet, so I'll just be trying to cut down on things a bit and see what happens

 

[Mamanyt1953]

If you got your stubborn girl to eat wet, you may come here and work on mine! I have spent HUNDREDS of dollars on every kind of canned food that there is, to no avail. People keep telling me that a cat will NOT starve itself, and I keep telling them, "You have not met my cat." Of course, part of the issue is that she had incipient hepatic lipidosis secondary to acute pancreatitis, and I canNOT allow her to go more than 48 hours without eating. And she knows to the minute when I'll give in. No matter how gradually I try to mix in the wet, she is NOT having it. She wants her Friskies.

 

[JulieHarr]

She is so cute. Sounds like she is smart and she's training you. I like what others have said, pick a place for the food and water and don't change it. Once had a vet tell me a cat can go 5-6 days without eating and can recover. The cats human can only go 2 days seeing them not eat and will call their vet in a panic on the 3rd day.

 

[misty8723]

If you got your stubborn girl to eat wet, you may come here and work on mine! I have spent HUNDREDS of dollars on every kind of canned food that there is, to no avail. People keep telling me that a cat will NOT starve itself, and I keep telling them, "You have not met my cat." Of course, part of the issue is that she had incipient hepatic lipidosis secondary to acute pancreatitis, and I canNOT allow her to go more than 48 hours without eating. And she knows to the minute when I'll give in. No matter how gradually I try to mix in the wet, she is NOT having it. She wants her Friskies.

It was just luck that I found something Cricket would eat, Weruva Cats in the Kitchen Chick Magnet. Then later Mack, Jack, and Skip. The common denominator is Mackerel. She'll also eat Soulistic Midnight Delight, also mackerel. Everything else she won't even sniff. I agree. I was in Petsmart once buying something and saying how it was the only thing my (previous fussy cat) Cynthia would eat and the guy behind me said just put the food down, when she gets hungry she'll eat it. I said you obviously don't know cats. Cricket still eats more of the dry than the wet, but I do what I can.

 

[misty8723]

She is so cute. Sounds like she is smart and she's training you. I like what others have said, pick a place for the food and water and don't change it. Once had a vet tell me a cat can go 5-6 days without eating and can recover. The cats human can only go 2 days seeing them not eat and will call their vet in a panic on the 3rd day.

When she first came to live here, she was on a little hunger strike and of course I was panicking. The rescue I got her from said she would eventually eat and weren't concerned. I don't know how many days, but I know bad things can happen if they don't eat and you can't let it go on too long. They also told me she would never eat wet food. They tried, because she wasn't eating there at first either, all different brands, flavors, consistencies. I was so excited when I finally got her to eat something wet I took a picture and sent it to them. I don't mind taking the food to them - all cats who come in here learn the ways of the house pretty quick - but she's just gotten so particular, nope not here, maybe over here. Oh no that won't work, let's try here. Okay, this is good, I'll have my three licks. She's such a sweetheart I just accommodate her. Dry food is in one place for them and so are the water bowls, so it's just the wet food. Austin will eat anywhere, and is not real picky.