Help/Advice for introductions

calicosrspecial

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Good morning! No real updates from last night or this morning but I was able to take another short video last night. No hissing or growling from Sapphire last night except she hissed at him when I was carrying him downstairs which made him start to bite me.

Sapphire was napping this morning and didn't come downstairs unit shortly after I put Fluffy back in his room for the morning so I didn't get the chance to do a face to face.

Enjoy the video and have a great day!

Fluffy and Sapphire Sept 30/21 Pt 2
"Good morning! No real updates from last night or this morning but I was able to take another short video last night." - Good morning. Ok and great on the video

" No hissing or growling from Sapphire last night except she hissed at him when I was carrying him downstairs which made him start to bite me."- :( Good she didn't hiss BUT not good he redirected to a bite when she did the one time

"Sapphire was napping this morning and didn't come downstairs unit shortly after I put Fluffy back in his room for the morning so I didn't get the chance to do a face to face." - That is fine

Video - My goodness, is he ADORABLE!!! He is being perfect. She looks good and actually looks down away from him (GREAT!!!). So overall really good.

"Enjoy the video and have a great day!" - I did enjoy the video. Fantastic. I LOVE how Fluffy is behaving. Actually perfect. She will trust him in time. He is being so good.

You too, have a great day!!
 
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Graham18

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"Good morning! No real updates from last night or this morning but I was able to take another short video last night." - Good morning. Ok and great on the video

" No hissing or growling from Sapphire last night except she hissed at him when I was carrying him downstairs which made him start to bite me."- :( Good she didn't hiss BUT not good he redirected to a bite when she did the one time

"Sapphire was napping this morning and didn't come downstairs unit shortly after I put Fluffy back in his room for the morning so I didn't get the chance to do a face to face." - That is fine

Video - My goodness, is he ADORABLE!!! He is being perfect. She looks good and actually looks down away from him (GREAT!!!). So overall really good.

"Enjoy the video and have a great day!" - I did enjoy the video. Fantastic. I LOVE how Fluffy is behaving. Actually perfect. She will trust him in time. He is being so good.

You too, have a great day!!
Thank you :)

He didn't bite super hard when he did. It was more of a "dad put my down so I can go see my sister" kind of bite.

I will just continue what I'm doing seeing as he is being really good. At what point should I start interactions again?
 

calicosrspecial

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Thank you :)

He didn't bite super hard when he did. It was more of a "dad put my down so I can go see my sister" kind of bite.

I will just continue what I'm doing seeing as he is being really good. At what point should I start interactions again?
"Thank you :) " - You are welcome

"He didn't bite super hard when he did." - Good

" It was more of a "dad put my down so I can go see my sister" kind of bite." - Yep, I know the action. Not good but good that he doesn;t want to hurt.

"I will just continue what I'm doing seeing as he is being really good." - Absolutely

" At what point should I start interactions again? " - Let's give it a few more days and then try. I would like to see Sapphire a bit more relaxed. Just let her observe him and if she makes a move towards her then go with it but don't encourage her for a few days.

Then we'll re-evaluate and get them interacting again. :)

Keep up the great work!!
 
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Graham18

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"Thank you :) " - You are welcome

"He didn't bite super hard when he did." - Good

" It was more of a "dad put my down so I can go see my sister" kind of bite." - Yep, I know the action. Not good but good that he doesn;t want to hurt.

"I will just continue what I'm doing seeing as he is being really good." - Absolutely

" At what point should I start interactions again? " - Let's give it a few more days and then try. I would like to see Sapphire a bit more relaxed. Just let her observe him and if she makes a move towards her then go with it but don't encourage her for a few days.

Then we'll re-evaluate and get them interacting again. :)

Keep up the great work!!
Perfect thank you :) I'll attempt to get more videos if I can.
 

calicosrspecial

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Video 1 - Interesting Sapphire is on the ground again and not up high. Good. He is doing great. Hilarious he goes into the treat bag. Overall, very good

Video 2 - Perfect. She is now up a touch. Observant, but good. He is being SO GOOD. Excellent!!!

Video 3 - He is doing great again, minding his own business. She is doing great, gets a touch sassy at the end probably because you were above her and reached from above her. Tells me she might have been a touch on edge as well BUT overall, she was doing great AND he was not bothering her.

SO overall, i LVOE what I saw in the videos except for her sassiness at the end. But that was very mild. In that situation maybe give her some eye kisses (slowly close your eyes to her, hold them closed for 5-10 seconds then slowly open them).

Overall, they look great!!

Keep up the great work and keep doing like in the videos (and having her watch him eat also). I really think that builds trust and confidence.

Keep up the great work!!
 
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Video 1 - Interesting Sapphire is on the ground again and not up high. Good. He is doing great. Hilarious he goes into the treat bag. Overall, very good

Video 2 - Perfect. She is now up a touch. Observant, but good. He is being SO GOOD. Excellent!!!

Video 3 - He is doing great again, minding his own business. She is doing great, gets a touch sassy at the end probably because you were above her and reached from above her. Tells me she might have been a touch on edge as well BUT overall, she was doing great AND he was not bothering her.

SO overall, i LVOE what I saw in the videos except for her sassiness at the end. But that was very mild. In that situation maybe give her some eye kisses (slowly close your eyes to her, hold them closed for 5-10 seconds then slowly open them).

Overall, they look great!!

Keep up the great work and keep doing like in the videos (and having her watch him eat also). I really think that builds trust and confidence.

Keep up the great work!!
Thank you :)

Her sassiness is nothing really that new. I know that is the sound she makes letting me know she doesn't want to be bothered even when Fluffy isn't around. She just does get a little more anxious when he is around but she never swats or bites me or anything, just makes her sounds and I know to leave her alone (usually followed by her wanting pets or cuddles a few minutes later haha).

The evening session was the same as the day. Fluffy was really good again, maybe with a bit more energy than earlier and a bit more focused on her and she was still a bit nervous. After I put Fluffy back behind the baby gates, she went over and laid in a box nearby.

20211002_204553.jpg


Nothing from today yet. I woke up with a major headache so I gave Sapphire her breakfast in her room and then let Fluffy out for some free time. So far he's just been curled up on a blanket just outside of her door.

20211003_092652.jpg
 

calicosrspecial

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Thank you :)

Her sassiness is nothing really that new. I know that is the sound she makes letting me know she doesn't want to be bothered even when Fluffy isn't around. She just does get a little more anxious when he is around but she never swats or bites me or anything, just makes her sounds and I know to leave her alone (usually followed by her wanting pets or cuddles a few minutes later haha).

The evening session was the same as the day. Fluffy was really good again, maybe with a bit more energy than earlier and a bit more focused on her and she was still a bit nervous. After I put Fluffy back behind the baby gates, she went over and laid in a box nearby.

View attachment 397252

Nothing from today yet. I woke up with a major headache so I gave Sapphire her breakfast in her room and then let Fluffy out for some free time. So far he's just been curled up on a blanket just outside of her door.

View attachment 397253
"Her sassiness is nothing really that new." - Ok, yes, some cats are like that.

" I know that is the sound she makes letting me know she doesn't want to be bothered even when Fluffy isn't around. She just does get a little more anxious when he is around but she never swats or bites me or anything, just makes her sounds and I know to leave her alone (usually followed by her wanting pets or cuddles a few minutes later haha)." - OK. Yes, often they will come on their terms for love. VERY common. Cats like to do things on their terms, not ours. :)

"The evening session was the same as the day." - Terrific

" Fluffy was really good again," - GREAT

"maybe with a bit more energy than earlier and a bit more focused on her " - Totally fine

"and she was still a bit nervous." - Understandable

" After I put Fluffy back behind the baby gates, she went over and laid in a box nearby." - PERFECT!!!! That is a nice positive

Pictures look GREAT

" Nothing from today yet." - Ok

" I woke up with a major headache" - Sorry, I hope you feel well soon.

" so I gave Sapphire her breakfast in her room and then let Fluffy out for some free time." - Totally fine

" So far he's just been curled up on a blanket just outside of her door." Awwwwww, that is the second pic?

Nice incremental positives in this update. Get well.
 
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"Her sassiness is nothing really that new." - Ok, yes, some cats are like that.

" I know that is the sound she makes letting me know she doesn't want to be bothered even when Fluffy isn't around. She just does get a little more anxious when he is around but she never swats or bites me or anything, just makes her sounds and I know to leave her alone (usually followed by her wanting pets or cuddles a few minutes later haha)." - OK. Yes, often they will come on their terms for love. VERY common. Cats like to do things on their terms, not ours. :)

"The evening session was the same as the day." - Terrific

" Fluffy was really good again," - GREAT

"maybe with a bit more energy than earlier and a bit more focused on her " - Totally fine

"and she was still a bit nervous." - Understandable

" After I put Fluffy back behind the baby gates, she went over and laid in a box nearby." - PERFECT!!!! That is a nice positive

Pictures look GREAT

" Nothing from today yet." - Ok

" I woke up with a major headache" - Sorry, I hope you feel well soon.

" so I gave Sapphire her breakfast in her room and then let Fluffy out for some free time." - Totally fine

" So far he's just been curled up on a blanket just outside of her door." Awwwwww, that is the second pic?

Nice incremental positives in this update. Get well.
Yes that's the second picture. He laid up there for close to an hour quietly hoping to see her.
 
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Awwwwwwwwwww

He is going to win her over (at some point).

Really cute!!!
He's definitely trying very hard. It's even getting hard to play with him in a room now because he just meows to be let out to go see her.

Just a fairly quick introduction tonight. Sapphire was still acting very tense but they did have some treats closer together tonight with some hisses from Sapphire. Eventually, when Fluffy wasn't paying attention, Sapphire snuck upstairs to her room. Of course a few minutes later she was running around really playful. I wish I knew how to get her more playful around him. He's been really good all week, but so far I've seen very minimal change in Sapphire for the most part. She's super tense when he's around and fine/playful immediately after he's either in his room or behind gates.
 

calicosrspecial

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He's definitely trying very hard. It's even getting hard to play with him in a room now because he just meows to be let out to go see her.

Just a fairly quick introduction tonight. Sapphire was still acting very tense but they did have some treats closer together tonight with some hisses from Sapphire. Eventually, when Fluffy wasn't paying attention, Sapphire snuck upstairs to her room. Of course a few minutes later she was running around really playful. I wish I knew how to get her more playful around him. He's been really good all week, but so far I've seen very minimal change in Sapphire for the most part. She's super tense when he's around and fine/playful immediately after he's either in his room or behind gates.
"He's definitely trying very hard." - He really is. :/ BUT he is doing everything right so she will eventually come around.

" It's even getting hard to play with him in a room now because he just meows to be let out to go see her." - Awwwwwwwww, that is sad. BUT I do think she will come around.

"Just a fairly quick introduction tonight. Sapphire was still acting very tense but they did have some treats closer together tonight with some hisses from Sapphire." - Ok, that is fine. GREAT that she had treats close to him. And if he behaves she will learn to trust more.

" Eventually, when Fluffy wasn't paying attention, Sapphire snuck upstairs to her room." - Ok

" Of course a few minutes later she was running around really playful." - That is good. I think she wants to play with him but just isn't there yet. Just keep doing what you are doing. We just need that breakthrough moment.

" I wish I knew how to get her more playful around him." - I think she will in time. Just keep doing what you are doing.

" He's been really good all week," - Yes he has.

" but so far I've seen very minimal change in Sapphire for the most part. " - Yes BUT so much progress was made up to that point. SO we just need that final piece to fit.

"She's super tense when he's around" - Yes but as long as he behaves she sound ease and get more comfortable.

" and fine/playful immediately after he's either in his room or behind gates. " - That is positive. She isn't hiding, sulking, etc.

We just need that final piece of trust to break through. It will happen. Just keep doing what you are doing. Maximize positives and minimize or avoid negatives. You did great this weekend.

Keep up the great work!!
 
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Good morning!
I just wanted to provide a quick update.

Sapphire seems to be doing a bit better. I brought Fluffy out yesterday morning right before I went to work, and she just laid up on her cushions the whole time and he pretty much just went straight to laying down beside me and even played a little bit. Last night, Sapphire watched him eat from her cushions then she jumped down on her own and sat (looked a bit tense but she was also sitting up with her tail wrapped around her which looked a bit more relaxed). They had some treats closer together and after each treat Sapphire would return to her previous position and just sit. This morning she was laying on the box outside of the baby gates and I took the gates down and she continued to just lay on the box while Fluffy tried to go see her. Eventually she moved further into the room and I let Fluffy come out further. He laid down a few times and played with a small toy for a little bit before he would try and go see her.

Overall he has been good most of the time. Sometimes I can tell he's getting a bit excited and a bit more energy at which point I'll distract him.

Hopefully there is more progress. It makes me so sad when Fluffy just cries to get let out of the room. I do try and let him out as much as I possibly can which unfortunately isn't a lot due to work, and also play with him as much as I can. I just feel horrible for him being locked in a room for most of every day.
 

calicosrspecial

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Good morning!
I just wanted to provide a quick update.

Sapphire seems to be doing a bit better. I brought Fluffy out yesterday morning right before I went to work, and she just laid up on her cushions the whole time and he pretty much just went straight to laying down beside me and even played a little bit. Last night, Sapphire watched him eat from her cushions then she jumped down on her own and sat (looked a bit tense but she was also sitting up with her tail wrapped around her which looked a bit more relaxed). They had some treats closer together and after each treat Sapphire would return to her previous position and just sit. This morning she was laying on the box outside of the baby gates and I took the gates down and she continued to just lay on the box while Fluffy tried to go see her. Eventually she moved further into the room and I let Fluffy come out further. He laid down a few times and played with a small toy for a little bit before he would try and go see her.

Overall he has been good most of the time. Sometimes I can tell he's getting a bit excited and a bit more energy at which point I'll distract him.

Hopefully there is more progress. It makes me so sad when Fluffy just cries to get let out of the room. I do try and let him out as much as I possibly can which unfortunately isn't a lot due to work, and also play with him as much as I can. I just feel horrible for him being locked in a room for most of every day.
"Good morning!
I just wanted to provide a quick update." - Good morning, great, let's see

"Sapphire seems to be doing a bit better." - :yess: :hyper: :clap2:

" I brought Fluffy out yesterday morning right before I went to work, and she just laid up on her cushions the whole time and he pretty much just went straight to laying down beside me and even played a little bit." - FANTASTIC!!! EXACTLY what we want to see.

" Last night, Sapphire watched him eat from her cushions then she jumped down on her own and sat (looked a bit tense but she was also sitting up with her tail wrapped around her which looked a bit more relaxed)." - Fantastic. I LOVE that she felt ok to come down.

" They had some treats closer together " - Terrific

"and after each treat Sapphire would return to her previous position and just sit." - Totally fine. Fluffy is really doing great not to be going after her, etc. VERY helpful action on his part.

"This morning she was laying on the box outside of the baby gates and I took the gates down and she continued to just lay on the box while Fluffy tried to go see her. Eventually she moved further into the room and I let Fluffy come out further. He laid down a few times and played with a small toy for a little bit before he would try and go see her." - Fantastic!!!

"Overall he has been good most of the time. Sometimes I can tell he's getting a bit excited and a bit more energy at which point I'll distract him." - He has been great. GREAT job distracting him. :clap2:

"Hopefully there is more progress." - There will be. :) This update is terrific.

" It makes me so sad when Fluffy just cries to get let out of the room. I do try and let him out as much as I possibly can which unfortunately isn't a lot due to work, and also play with him as much as I can. " - Please try not to be sad. It is just the way it needs to be for now. He will be out and about soon. :)

"I just feel horrible for him being locked in a room for most of every day. " - I know. BUT that stress, negative emotions will get picked up by the cats and cause them stress. I KNOW it is less than ideal BUT it needs to be for Sapphire. He will fine soon when she fully accepts him. You are doing everything to make him happy and I am sure he is fine (if he wasn't he would be showing us).

I feel they are soooooooo close. Just keep it up, keep it positive. Sapphire is making really nice progress!!!

Keep up the great work!! You are almost there. :)
 
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Positive update #2.
Tonight's session started as normal. Fluffy was eating on the floor as usual and Sapphire was relaxing on the cushions. Immediately after he was done eating, Fluffy turned around, walked around a bit, then laid down and started lazily playing with a toy on the ground. Sapphire started eating her food which I put up on the cushions (I don't put it on the ground anymore because I know she will only nibble a bit, and when Fluffy sees the bowl of food that isn't his on the ground, he gets really fixated on it).

Fluffy was laying down again a bit closer to me and when Sapphire was done eating, she jumped to the ground and walked a few feet out to the middle of the living room and just sat there. Fluffy did get up but was easily distracted with a treat and then laid down again and started to play with the small ball right beside him and was half watching Sapphire and half focusing on the toy. His tail was really wagging but he didn't seem like he was going to get up. Since he was being really good and didn't seem like he was going to get up, I started moving Da Bird with a brand new attachment back and forth in front of Sapphire because she actually didn't seem tense or nervous at all (her eyes were really wide and she actually looked pretty happy). She just watched the toy at first but then she took a few quick swats at her as I was putting it down. Out of the blue, Sapphire started to play like crazy on her own with the attachment piece that was laying on the ground for about 10/15 seconds. Fluffy immediately got really excited and got into his ready to play/chase/pounce position, but I was able to distract him with another treat and he calmed down before I gave them each another treat and then brought Fluffy to his room for bird videos and bed time. Sapphire didn't seem at all phased so I'd say it was a really positive encounter.

I want to add that I did get a new type of calming chew today from a small locally owned cat shop and gave one to Sapphire about half an hour before the session so that may have helped the tension levels as well. Fluffy didn't like the new ones, but I have another daily calming/anti anxiety chew I've been giving them for months to help with separation anxiety that he loves to eat with his breakfast.

I'm thinking that when I'm not alone for the introductions, I'll try and get them both playing at the same time, that way Sapphire can keep playing and I won't have to worry about Fluffy getting too excited by her.
 

calicosrspecial

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Positive update #2.
Tonight's session started as normal. Fluffy was eating on the floor as usual and Sapphire was relaxing on the cushions. Immediately after he was done eating, Fluffy turned around, walked around a bit, then laid down and started lazily playing with a toy on the ground. Sapphire started eating her food which I put up on the cushions (I don't put it on the ground anymore because I know she will only nibble a bit, and when Fluffy sees the bowl of food that isn't his on the ground, he gets really fixated on it).

Fluffy was laying down again a bit closer to me and when Sapphire was done eating, she jumped to the ground and walked a few feet out to the middle of the living room and just sat there. Fluffy did get up but was easily distracted with a treat and then laid down again and started to play with the small ball right beside him and was half watching Sapphire and half focusing on the toy. His tail was really wagging but he didn't seem like he was going to get up. Since he was being really good and didn't seem like he was going to get up, I started moving Da Bird with a brand new attachment back and forth in front of Sapphire because she actually didn't seem tense or nervous at all (her eyes were really wide and she actually looked pretty happy). She just watched the toy at first but then she took a few quick swats at her as I was putting it down. Out of the blue, Sapphire started to play like crazy on her own with the attachment piece that was laying on the ground for about 10/15 seconds. Fluffy immediately got really excited and got into his ready to play/chase/pounce position, but I was able to distract him with another treat and he calmed down before I gave them each another treat and then brought Fluffy to his room for bird videos and bed time. Sapphire didn't seem at all phased so I'd say it was a really positive encounter.

I want to add that I did get a new type of calming chew today from a small locally owned cat shop and gave one to Sapphire about half an hour before the session so that may have helped the tension levels as well. Fluffy didn't like the new ones, but I have another daily calming/anti anxiety chew I've been giving them for months to help with separation anxiety that he loves to eat with his breakfast.

I'm thinking that when I'm not alone for the introductions, I'll try and get them both playing at the same time, that way Sapphire can keep playing and I won't have to worry about Fluffy getting too excited by her.
Positive update #2.
"Tonight's session started as normal. Fluffy was eating on the floor as usual and Sapphire was relaxing on the cushions." - Perfect

" Immediately after he was done eating, Fluffy turned around, walked around a bit, then laid down and started lazily playing with a toy on the ground." - Perfect

" Sapphire started eating her food which I put up on the cushions (I don't put it on the ground anymore because I know she will only nibble a bit, and when Fluffy sees the bowl of food that isn't his on the ground, he gets really fixated on it)." - Great

"Fluffy was laying down again a bit closer to me and when Sapphire was done eating, she jumped to the ground and walked a few feet out to the middle of the living room and just sat there." - :yess: :hyper: :clap2: LOVE that she was confident enough to come down and sit in the middle (own it).

" Fluffy did get up but was easily distracted with a treat and then laid down again and started to play with the small ball right beside him and was half watching Sapphire and half focusing on the toy." - Perfect, GREAT job with him.

" His tail was really wagging but he didn't seem like he was going to get up." - Ok

" Since he was being really good and didn't seem like he was going to get up, I started moving Da Bird with a brand new attachment back and forth in front of Sapphire because she actually didn't seem tense or nervous at all (her eyes were really wide and she actually looked pretty happy). She just watched the toy at first but then she took a few quick swats at her as I was putting it down. Out of the blue, Sapphire started to play like crazy on her own with the attachment piece that was laying on the ground for about 10/15 seconds." - :yess::hyper::clap2: Fantastic

" Fluffy immediately got really excited and got into his ready to play/chase/pounce position, but I was able to distract him with another treat " - Wow!!! I thought for sure he was going to start playing with the toy.

"and he calmed down before I gave them each another treat and then brought Fluffy to his room for bird videos and bed time." - Wow, fantastic!! I LOVE that they had a treat together.

" Sapphire didn't seem at all phased so I'd say it was a really positive encounter." - EXACTLY what we want to se. I am SO PROUD of her and Fluffy AND you!!!

"I want to add that I did get a new type of calming chew today from a small locally owned cat shop and gave one to Sapphire about half an hour before the session so that may have helped the tension levels as well." - Ok

" Fluffy didn't like the new ones, but I have another daily calming/anti anxiety chew I've been giving them for months to help with separation anxiety that he loves to eat with his breakfast." - Ok

"I'm thinking that when I'm not alone for the introductions, I'll try and get them both playing at the same time, that way Sapphire can keep playing and I won't have to worry about Fluffy getting too excited by her. " - Great idea.

Also, if you can just get Sapphire to play in that same area (with Fluffy in his room) that could be helpful.

Overall, this is a big step forward. GREAT JOB EVERYONE!!!!
 
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