Have you ever broken up with your hair dresser?

AbbysMom

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I've been going to the same hair dresser for around 12 years now. One of my friends also goes to her. I haven't been happy with my hair after she does it for a while now. I haven't really liked the color for a while now and two times out of three within a few days I can see my roots again. I've brought it up to her numerous times and have gotten nowhere. She doesn't keep track of what products she uses, so if I go in there and tell her that I like what she did last time with the color, she has no idea what she used. My friend has had similar issues the last few times she got her hair done.

I'm also concerned she's not following the current safety protocols. My friend has been and said she pulled her mask down a few times and she was sneaking people in when she was supposed to be closed.

Tomorrow I have an appointment with a different hairdresser. I haven't been since February and since the dye didn't take on my roots back then, they are at least six inches long right now.

This is going to get awkward though. The old hairdresser has been texting me reminding me that she is open and waiting for me whenever I'm ready to get my hair done.

Have you ever broken up with a hair dresser and how did it go?
 

MoonstoneWolf

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Not sure if you consider Fantastic Sams as a hairdresser but since the fiasco with Great Clips here in Missouri I just decided to go to my Mom's hairdresser instead. She's an older woman, takes older patients and none of them actually travel anywhere or do anything that would contribute to the spread of COVID 19. Besides she's a local business and it's not out of my way as I get my hair cut while Mom is under the hair dryer.
 

jefferd18

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Not sure if you consider Fantastic Sams as a hairdresser but since the fiasco with Great Clips here in Missouri I just decided to go to my Mom's hairdresser instead. She's an older woman, takes older patients and none of them actually travel anywhere or do anything that would contribute to the spread of COVID 19. Besides she's a local business and it's not out of my way as I get my hair cut while Mom is under the hair dryer.

I live in your state,so if you don't mind me asking, what was the fiasco with Great Clips?
 

MoochNNoodles

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Oof that's awkward and I love to avoid awkward. :ohwell: I think you might just have to think ahead how to politely (but simply) say that you've not been happy with your colors. I mean it could help her improve. Maybe after you've been to the new place and know if you like it or not. It would be easier if you were able to say you were switching to give business to a family member or personal friend. Maybe in a greeting card saying thanks? I don't think you can avoid awkward unless you just ignore her texts till she gives up. But that leaves awkward if you run into her in public!
 

MonaLyssa33

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I don't see a hairdresser often enough to really have a relationship with one. The one I go to more often is actually a friend from high school, but even then, I will sometimes go to a chain hair salon if I just need a trim. I also don't get my hair dyed so if I do start doing that in the future, I'll probably more consistently see my friend.
 

Willowy

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I live in your state,so if you don't mind me asking, what was the fiasco with Great Clips?
A couple of stylists at a Great Clips in MO tested positive, and saw a lot of customers before they knew it. The good news is that masks work, because nobody actually contracted the virus! So I would call it a narrowly avoided fiasco, not a full-blown fiasco ;).
2 hairstylists with coronavirus ended up not infecting any of their 140 clients

I don't see a regular hair stylist either. But I would say that if it's something you think she can improve on, rather than negligence, it's kinder to say something about it. Maybe a note if you don't want to say anything face-to-face.
 

neely

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This is going to get awkward though. The old hairdresser has been texting me reminding me that she is open and waiting for me whenever I'm ready to get my hair done.
Please don't feel awkward, I went through something similar and just never replied. If you text back you have to keep coming up with excuses so better to leave it alone. The year one of my daughters was getting married the hairdresser I was going to for a long time did something out of the ordinary with my cut and said she had to get me ready for the wedding. She basically ruined my hairstyle so I was very upset. I had several recommendations about someone else at a different salon and although I was anxious about going to someone new it was the best decision I ever made.

She doesn't keep track of what products she uses, so if I go in there and tell her that I like what she did last time with the color, she has no idea what she used.
Doesn't she write the formula/product down to keep a record of it?
 

denice

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I used to go to Great Clips so I didn't have a regular hairstylist. I don't like the way they are doing things, the precautions I believe are subpar so I am going to a regular salon that takes all the precautions. I would probably just ignore the texts. I did quit a stylists years ago and she sent me a couple of cards trying to get me to come back and I just ignored them. I don't feel that I am obligated to continue giving my business to someone just because I have been over a period of time.
 

Mia6

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I would gently tell her, not text. why you left. Twelve years is a long time.
Maybe she will improve herself, just not with you.
 

Elphaba09

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I agree that you are right to find another hairdresser. She obviously is not listening to you and is not paying attention to the current health regulations, so you should not feel guilty. She has to know you are displeased if she is ignoring you.

I have not had my hair professionally cut in almost 20 years! Haha! I had been going to this one woman every 6 to 10 weeks for about three years at that time. I had waist-length hair (now hip-length) and always just got a trim unless I had waited longer between cuts. Never had I gotten more than three inches at any given time, and that was once. I went to her one day and she started talking to me about the possibility of layers. I said something along the lines of, "I think they look nice on other people, but it just does not seem like it would fit my routine." I did agree that it might look cute. She kept talking and then lifted a section of my "bangs" (not that I really have any), and cut about 12 inches from them, causing them to be just past my shoulders. I was extremely upset. She insisted that had agreed to layers. Never in a million years would I agree to that! Especially that short. Because the front was so short, she had to cut the rest into layers so that I did not look insane. I swear she looked gleeful chopping my hair. It took forever to grow back out. Now, I just trim it myself with my husband's help.

I should have known she was not one for long hair because of the way she brushed and combed it.

I have considered going back to a different hairdresser; however, I just think of how upset I was all those years ago.
 

Winchester

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Yes. I had been going to a woman for years. And a few years ago, I went in for my appt, only to have her start working on a walk-in. 30 minutes after my appt time, she walked over to me and said, "OK, I'm ready!" Rick had already come in because she would color me, then while I was processing, she would cut Rick's hair. He looked at me and said, "What the H?" When the stylist came over, I was livid. And I told her that that had been rude, I was there and there was no reason to take the walk-in. And I walked out. The stylist told Rick that I had to expect such things because she was cutting my hair that day as a favor to me and had to work me into her schedule. That was an outright lie and Rick told her so. During the holidays, I made three appts at one time: October, November, and December. All made in September. That way, I never had to worry about being worked into her schedule. I never went back and she had done my hair for about 20 years.

So I started going to different places, trying to find a stylist that I liked. Eventually, I started going to Ulta and while I really liked the way she did my hair, Ulta is very expensive....at least I think so. I went there for a few years, but I felt that I couldn't "fit in," if that makes any sense. Lots of younger women and guys. Very girly-girl and I'm simply not like that. I left there and went to another salon and I feel fine there. I really like the stylist and it's considerably less expensive. No points like I had at Ulta, but I'd rather pay less money. And I've been going there for a while now.

Well, since the Sheltering, I haven't been going anywhere. And my whites show it!
 

Norachan

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I do my hair by myself. I think I've been to a hairdresser 3 times at the most in my whole life. The last time I went it seemed like a ridiculously long time to spend sitting in an uncomfortable hair, drinking bad coffee and then ultimately paying over $100 for a colour change I could have done just as well by myself.

I used to use Directions Hair Colour | The official online store by La Riché on my hair, but it's started to look a bit knackered recently. I'm using henna instead now. It's already a lot healthier looking.

I don't ever cut my hair and I'm looking forward to going completely white. I don't see any point in trying to have the same colour hair I had when I was 25 as I go deeper and deeper into my 40's. Grey hair can be quite beautiful if it's well cared for.
 

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Don't feel bad about changing stylists, it comes down to money in the long run and you wouldn't shop at a store or get your car fixed at a place that didn't listen or respond to your needs, when you leave her salon your haircut/color job is her business card for everyone to see and every stylist I ever had cared about that tremendously.
 

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I’d be worried that if I tried to explain why I wasn’t returning to her, she would argue or promise to do better if I’d just give her another chance. And then I’d feel guilted into it and would just be postponing the inevitable. If it were me, I’d text her back and say simply, “Thanks for the update. I’ll let you know if I’m ready to come back.” I would hope that would stop the texts from her. If she texts after that, I’d respond with “Thanks for reaching out. I’ve decided that it’s time to make a change. I wish you well!” Since it’s been 12 years, you could also follow up with a card thanking her for her years of service.

This must happen to stylists all the time. Getting your hair done is a very personal thing for most people and if you don’t feel good about it, you have to switch. I’m sure they know this!
 

Jem

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I've never broken up with a hair dresser, but I don't have one....
But as someone who works in the health care service industry, I've had people break up with me...in a sense. Some was because they were moving, some was when I moved to a different location, and some just kind of fell off the radar, or would fall off the radar for a couple of months or years and eventually find their way back to me. I never push or pry when someone stops coming in, as you never know what their circumstances are. And I am confident in my skills even knowing that what I offer is not necessarily everyone's cup of tea. All therapists develop their own way of doing things. I will say that I've only ever had one client ever "break up with me" under bad circumstances, but honestly it was a good thing...this client was a difficult person and I was glad when she stopped coming in. I have also had some clients stop returning when my practice became busy, needing appointments to be book ahead. Some people wanted to be able to call in that day and been seen that day....so they moved on to someone who could accommodate that, which just wasn't me as I was too busy.
As a professional, if a client stops wanting to see me I do not take offense. It only bother's me if they stop coming in if their expectations of what I can do for them exceed what is possible...and blame me for it.....which has rarely happened, because I am very upfront with the limitations of the treatment I can provide....and how much work THEY need to contribute on their own time...but some just don't want to put in the effort....but that's another story.
So if you feel the need to confront your hair dresser, so YOU feel better, by all means, go for it. But there is nothing wrong with just not going anymore. You could just tell her that "My circumstances have changed, and unfortunately I will not be returning, but thank you for all the years of service". It is none of her business what those circumstances are, but saying something like that might get her to stop contacting you.
 
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cassiopea

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For sure, don't feel bad about ending it. Simply politely inform her and than carry on. The fact that she isn't bothering to correct herself or evolve from it is pretty unfortunate and unprofessional. Leaving clients will hopefully solidify that what she is doing isn't working.

My fave hair dresser (Been going to her for a year and a half now) gave me the usual blonde balayage and trim one time. A couple days later after the first wash all the toner disappeared and my hair was reddish and brassy. Not something that was suppose to happen lol I messaged her, she fit me in her next opening, fixed everything and all done for free (Although I still happily gave her a tip) It was a problem with that specific brand they were using - Another customer had the same thing happen to her. Hairdresser used something else that was full proof and stronger and voila.

As she told me, your hair is pretty much a walking advertisement. If it doesn't look good and people associate it with a certain salon....welp, that doesn't help with reputation and future clients. Plus, hair dressers learn all the time - whether an apprentice or a veteran. Trends, formulas, techniques etc change regularly. It's appreciated that a booboo can be known so it can be added growth and experience. And so that it doesn't happen to someone else either! As she also said, "Don't worry, we will always take care of you!"

The point is, that is usually how normal stylists respond - not disregard like that. And of course the salon is doing a great job with safety precautions.

Going to a good hairdresser will make a world of wonderful difference! Definitely worth it and your worth it!


Anyhoo, yes, it isn't the most fun to "split" but at the end of the day, you did explain to her what was wrong multiple times already and she didn't follow up on it. Don't feel guilty (don't ler her guilt trip you either) or feel like you owe her anything or go into a deep long winded explanation. Be to the point and firm and if she pressures just ignore and carry on. Maybe you will find your perfect hairdresser right away, maybe it will take a couple of different visits - but he or she is out there.
 

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I went to the same hairdresser for about 10 years, but his prices went up and up and up and in the end I couldn't afford to pay £65 for the same haircut I used to spend £30 on. He understood, and it took me years and years to find a hairdresser I wanted to go back to!

The only time I felt awkward was when I tried a new salon. The cut was with a woman called Lauren, and I didn't like it. I'd had great recommendations from the salon owner, Ben, so I called up, cancelled the next appointment I had booked with Lauren and booked one with Ben instead.

It was Lauren who took the call 😬

But for reasons like that, I won't ever get too friendly with a hairdresser, ever! I'll always be polite and I'll always tip, but never get to the point where I'm sending them Christmas cards or inviting them to my wedding. At the end of the day, I'm simply paying for a service, and if I don't like that service I'll go elsewhere. No one should ever feel guilty about switching, or worse, be guilt-tripped into getting a service you're not happy with because you don't want to ruin a friendship! Easiest solution is to treat it as a business transaction and not like you're the one doing a favour for a friend.
 
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