Guilt Over Adopting Second Cat

sara729 · Jun 22, 2018

Sorry if this isn't the right forum to post this! So I just adopted a second cat after about 6 months of considering it and thinking that it would be nice to have a friend for my current cat who is usually calm, friendly, and very playful. The kitten is 2 months old, blind, and very friendly/affectionate. However, my current cat (2 years old) is NOT happy, the kitten is in a separate room but the scent is enough to completely stress my cat out. She goes around hissing, growling and swatting at the door (this is the first time I've ever heard her hiss/growl). She usually loves pets but when I try to pet her she growls at me and runs. I'm starting to feel really guilty, wondering if this was the right decision. I love providing a home for a blind kitten and he really is a sweet little guy, but my heart hurts for my current cat. So my questions are:

-How long did it take for your cats to adjust to each other after adopting the second cat?
-Is it normal to feel guilty after adoption when your current cat is so unhappy?

I have no plans of bringing the kitten back to the shelter so I'm really hoping they can bond at some point.

Kori · Jun 22, 2018

Don’t panic!

We have 6 cats, and had 23 kittens through our doors as well!

Our cats are completely intolerant to any newbies, strays or rescues, however they adore each other, but are different ages, genders and from different litters and didn’t grow up together!

It took almost a year for our harmonious household to come to fruition. Take it very slow, expect hissing and aggression for days, weeks, months. It’s fifferent for every cat. When you eventually let your existing cat meet the kitten, ensure it’s always supervised, but don’t rush to separat then if your cat swats or nips, hisses and growls etc. It’s normal and you need to allow the new kitten to be dominated and your existing cat to be dominating. Once the hierarchy has been established, you should see things settle down over time. YouTube is massively useful for videos on this topic and may reassure you.

Major props for not just resuming the kitten like some people would do.

#unsunghero

ArtNJ · Jun 23, 2018

Its easier with a kitten, and a blind kitten, who presumably isn't likely to jump all over the older cat, should make things easier. The older cat needs to get this out of its system. Proceed with the introduction at a slow measured pace; a little hissing and growling is nothing. Older cats essentially never hurt kittens. About the worst that might happen is the kitten might get swatted or held down a little if it is too adventurous and ignores the verbal warnings. Which is actually fine, as it will teach the kitten to stay back until the older cat chills, so don't panic even if the kitten is held down and squeals a little.

You'll obviously need to watch closely when they are introduced, and make sure not to allow unsupervised time too soon, but it should be fine in the long run. In this situation, blindness isn't really a handicap -- its a help. The reaction now is likely worse than the reaction will be too the actual kitten.

di and bob · Jun 23, 2018

I agree with the above....I honestly didn't think my blended family would EVER get along, it took almost a year, and they are finally family. Females, especially, are hissing, growling, matriarchs and are meant to be this way. She will teach the new kitten limits and manners. All families have their tiffs, growling, swatting, holding down and squealing are all normal. Hard, deep bites and scratches that draw blood are not. It will take at least a month for your older cat to settle down, she is so nervous and upset right now, even pets/attention from you is upsetting to her. (misdirected aggression) Exchange scents with blankets they lay on, try to feed as close as possible to bring on good feelings, and provide your older girl with a high up place she can escape to and observe things. Don't let her fool you, she will actually enjoy watching the antics of another, it will relieve boredom and make life interesting. Bless you for taking in that blind kitten! He will bring much love to your house, and your heart!

sara729 · Jun 24, 2018

Thank you for the replies, they've definitely reassured me! I've began to let them see each other for short periods and while my resident cat still hisses/growls/swats at him, I feel like she's warming up to him. She'll follow him around and when she chases and swats at him she'll go and play with her toys right after so I think it's more like playing as opposed to attacking. When she does hiss/swat at him it doesn't look like the claws are out and the kitten remains fairly calm. I'm hoping in a week or two I can stop separating them for most of the day.