Getting my boy acquainted with a stray cat we just adopted

[OwnedByScout]

We used to feed a stray cat for almost a year. After a lot of complaints from other residents, we finally adopted her and took her in. We also have another cat that we had rescued about 3 years ago. We are facing a few problems getting the two acquainted. Both are fixed and the stray is more 'feral'. She is friendly with humans. Its other cats she cannot stand Since we got her she is in a spare bedroom in the apartment. The first 3-4 days we would alternatively let both of them have access to common areas of the house (which we still do). Yesterday we put her in a cage and brought her face to face with my boy. There was some growling and hissing. My boy is visibly scared of her. I made one mistake of letting them be together face to face unhindered right in the beginning and for a brief moment when I turned away she attacked my boy and he remembers this. Today we again got them face to face without any cages (they both seem to have cage anxiety). Today they were okay (no attacks from either side) but I can see my boy is still scared (though he is very curious about her). As long as he is still she is okay. The moment he moves, she growls and yowls. Is this normal while introducing two adult cats? Is it safe to let them be in the same space for more time now?

 

[Maria Bayote]

Thank you for taking in this cat. One less cat off the street is a victory for us cat lovers.

It will take time. My girl Bourbon still swats, hisses and growls at my boy Barley until now even after years of being together. Somebody will advice you more about proper introduction soon. But take it slow. You are doing a good job.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Hi. TCS has articles about doing introductions. I have attached a link to them below. I would stay away from cages - as it seems you plan on doing - especially with a feral. I would also not be so quick to put them in the same space unfettered just yet, as it would seem you have only had the new cat for a very short period of time, yes?

Given they are both adult cats, and one is pretty much from a feral background, getting them to accept one another could take months, so be prepared to hang in there!

How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction – Cat Articles
How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide – Cat Articles

 

[kittychick]

Yeah to you for wanting to give these two both a happy, safe home! I loved what Maria Bayote said - - "One less cat on the street is a victory for all cat lovers!" SO true! So pat yourself on the back for what you've undertaken!!!!

Cat introductions usually take time (if only they understood when we said "Hey guys - both of you are loved - there's plenty of food to go around so it's not a cage match for who gets dinner"!). Don't beat yourself up too much that you introduced them without a "warm up to each other time." It often does mean a step back (since the fear of each other/territorial fear/etc was implanted) - - but it's not 'un-doable' at all! Many people have FAR nastier intros - - so you're actually ahead (time-wise as far as behavior) then many (I know - doesn't feel like it).

The main thing is time. (I know - at the holidays in particular - we all have virtually none of that - but it's a major part of the long-term solution).

The TCS articles pointed out by FeebysOwner are great reads with wonderful info - - read both before taking any other steps.

I also recommend reading these two articles (after the TCS articles, of course!). The first is from Best Friends Animal Society, and the second is from a Humane Society. Both good reads with lots of tips!

Best Friends: Introducing a New Cat
Adding Another Cat

Now that you've filled your reading quota for the day - - you can put things into action. Again - - remind yourself the slower the better (which I know is like telling a kid to not shake a package before Christmas!).

I've socialized many many cats and kittens over the years - From feral to semi-feral to horrible abused to just plain cranky - - -and every one is different. And I know there are differing opinions on cages/crates, and I respect everyone's opinion on it. Even if we come at socialization methods differently (often based on personal experience) - we're all trying to do what's best for the kitties!!! We do sometimes use VERY large crates (Great Dane sized) sometimes in the very beginning for a short time - - -but it does vary depending on what we're doing, what situation the cat comes from, what's the intended result, where the cat's going to go, etc. The one situation that crates, for me, have rarely worked well is with true ferals (of course there are exceptions - - we use them virtually every time with TNR cases that aren't being socialized - just contained in a way that's best and safest for all until they're returned safely to their environment.

I'd probably stop switching their environments for now - - I certainly understand why you're doing it and it's not a bad thing. And every cat is different. But I've just found that often space-swapping, the non-resident cat doesn't have a way to feel like they've got a "personal, safe space" and the resident cat doesn't get why he's suddenly deprived of space. So we "scent swap" instead. Find soft, fuzzy things (I've yet to meet a cat that didn't love those fuzzy blankets - not fleece - but that 'bunny fur soft' material -- they almost immediately start kneading when they spot a new one, and curl up. Plus right now in the states, you can find them VERY inexpensively - we just picked up 10 of them at Kroger grocery store (?) for $3 each!). Place them around each cat's territory where they're likely to lie on them. And if possible - get some cat scratching posts and also put them in each other's spaces. We sprinkle ours with a bit of catnip (or use catnip spray on them). And after each cat has used those items (or anything else you can move easily) - - - swap the items from one cat's territory to the other and vice versa. It's a VERY non-threatening way for them to learn each others smells, which is another chink in the "this cat belongs here" for them.

After a week (or longer!) of that, we move on to eating on either sides of a door (with the door SHUT tight) - -first with bowls a few feet from the door, and then moving them toward the door if all's going well. We do that for a minimum of a few days - longer if there's animosity (growling, refusal to eat, etc). We then fix the door open so they can see each other & get a really good smell of each other when they eat, but NOT enough to get a paw through! If all goes well, stick with that a few more days, and then move to opening the door JUST enough for them to reach a paw through (I pull the food bowls back a tad at first for this - - since I learned the hard way that when a kitty is comfortable eating, looking at their bowl, some kitties who aren't quite so comfortable find that the PERFECT time to try to swat the unsuspecting kitty (on the other side) with a nice bop to the head. NOTE: many people use screen doors too - - which can be another way to do this similar exercise. If that sounds like an appealing way to try it - - just ask!

It'll take time - - -which is SO hard (to show you how much I empathize, we're currently trying to bring inside three 7-year-old ferals we TNRd five years ago - - with the goal of (fingers very crossed) good relationships with the three we have inside now (one of which was part of that colony, but they'd kicked her out bc of her CHP). It's a sloooooow process.....but headway's being made!

Just remember - slow's not bad (going too slowly never hurt anyone!) - and chances are very good that, with continued slow intros, they'll learn to at least share the space and share you. Hopefully they even get that it's even more fun to share both AND like each other!

Keep us all posted. Many, many, many of us on this site have been where you are- - some of us multiple times! So please - don't be afraid to ask anything! Nothing's too goofy (chances are we've all done it) to ask. So let us know how it's going - - -and again - - HUGE kudos for providing a home for your new one!

 

[OwnedByScout]

Thank you for that detailed answer. I really appreciate it. I really want them to get along. Our next-door neighbor also has a Calico and my boy loves playing with her. Surprisingly they hit it off right in the beginning. We did not have to go through this introduction process. One day my boy was playing in the common area, she came along, they sniffed each other and that was it

I have not read through the articles but it is on my list for the weekend.

 

[kittychick]

Sorry it was so long - - - I obviously wasn't a short story writer in another life!

Having the desire, and being willing to do the research is a wonderful step. I've definitely had kitties get along immediately, but I've also had it go very badly because I rushed relationships way too fast (particularly in my early years fostering - before I knew better!). I think you'll end up doing well - - - because you're willing to do whatever's necessary - putting the kitty's feelings first!

Keep us posted as to how things go!

 

[OwnedByScout]

Sorry it was so long - - - I obviously wasn't a short story writer in another life!

Having the desire, and being willing to do the research is a wonderful step. I've definitely had kitties get along immediately, but I've also had it go very badly because I rushed relationships way too fast (particularly in my early years fostering - before I knew better!). I think you'll end up doing well - - - because you're willing to do whatever's necessary - putting the kitty's feelings first!

Keep us posted as to how things go!

I actually liked the detailed reply It really helps and you took the time to really understand my challenge and help me with it. I appreciate that.

 

[OwnedByScout]

I thought I'd post an update on this. After two months of trying to get them acquainted on our own, we finally gave up and sought professional help. We are currently boarding the two of them with a professional animal behaviorist. So far they seem to be doing a great job. She sent us pictures of the two of them sitting next to each other quietly without any hissing growling or fighting. We are getting them back in about two more weeks. Keeping my fingers crossed!

 

[jen]

Hope that works out! I feel like it will be square one again when they come back home. Cats are all about environment and smells and stress and territory. Please keep us posted. I never heard of anyone sending them away to a behaviorist before. I am curious how that all works.