Frenemies? Arch nemeses? Pals?

Willowwombat

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Okay, so here we are six months in, with Dude (9-year old male adoptee) and Willow (8 year old female).

They are pretty peaceful together, and I'm pretty sure they're playing, but because I'm new to this two-cat thing I'm not sure and I have a couple of questions.

Up until recently Willow chased Dude a lot, obnoxiously so, and though it was friendly enough, though sometimes she would swat at his butt as he ran away and he would get upset. There hasn't been much hissing and no growling at all, so I figure they are fine, as in safe, though Willow can be an absolute pest sometimes and he climbs up his cat condo to get away -- and sometimes afterwards she walks up to him and flops over onto her back, so she really is friendly, and I think he knows it even though he often backs away from her. She hasn't been chasing him much lately, which is a relief for the little guy, I'm sure.

Anyway, he has finally manned up and has started to assert himself a little bit. So the new behaviour is that he'll hide somewhere really close to her -- she has to know he's there, I think -- does the full bum-wiggle, charges up to her and swats her in the face, and races off She usually looks pretty stunned, like she can't understand how the tables got turned, but she doesn't react badly. Usually she'll ambush him in the same way later on. I mean they both do it, but it's so good to see Dude feeling confident that she isn't going to hurt him.

Is this play? Does it seem like they could end up being good friends? I'd love to have them be really good buddies.
 

Alldara

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Sounds like play from what you're describing. If you're finding them following one another, it can be a little bothersome over time to the other cat, so I'd recommend adding an extra okay session to the day and some enrichment that doesn't involve bothering one another.
 
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Willowwombat

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I'm really happy that Dude is now not afraid of Willow. She does respect his boundaries and they're on an equal footing.

I've never felt I needed to intervene. The only time I've reacted is when I've caught Dude spraying the BBQ, and then I just clapped my hands at him.

He was roaring around the house this morning and she tried to join in. He did not like that and chased her away for about five feet and then they both sat down. It cracks me up. She was just sitting there looking at him while he shook his tiny little furry white fist at her. Then, honour satisfied, he strutted away.

Willow really adores him. She flops over and reaches out at him with her paws, and does roly-polys and licks her tail and makes blinky eyes at him, all the time. He's playing hard to get, though.
 

Nebaug

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I'm really happy that Dude is now not afraid of Willow. She does respect his boundaries and they're on an equal footing.

I've never felt I needed to intervene. The only time I've reacted is when I've caught Dude spraying the BBQ, and then I just clapped my hands at him.

He was roaring around the house this morning and she tried to join in. He did not like that and chased her away for about five feet and then they both sat down. It cracks me up. She was just sitting there looking at him while he shook his tiny little furry white fist at her. Then, honour satisfied, he strutted away.

Willow really adores him. She flops over and reaches out at him with her paws, and does roly-polys and licks her tail and makes blinky eyes at him, all the time. He's playing hard to get, though.
Finally, a man with ……will, lol
 
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Willowwombat

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He won't be able to resist my beautiful little black panther forever, though.
 

Cat McCannon

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You have two cats that are getting to know each other in the normal cat way. If it wasn’t play, If it wasn’t mutually agreeable, they wouldn’t seek each other’s company.

In fact, you should congratulate yourself. It sounds like things are coming along swimmingly.
 
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Willowwombat

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It's so reassuring to hear that.

My husband is gravely ill, and we weren't paying enough attention to our Willow, and since she had made friends with another cat in the past, we hoped she would benefit from feline company if we adopted a cat that had previously lived with another cat. She really did accept him very quickly but he had a lot to overcome, being a skittish, shy cat anyway, losing his people and then being at the SPCA and then into a strange house with strange people and a much larger cat with friendly but overly pushy intentions.
 

Mamanyt1953

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I am so sorry to hear about your husband.

You're doing something right...these cats are doing well, and thriving with each other! And my opinion is that your boy is gonna fall for Willow, and hard! Might take him some time, but she'll have him wrapped around her left hind paw!
 
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