Freeze Dry or Cremate to help with grieving?

[ty3535]

My 10yo male is healthy and I certainly hope he stays that way for many years to come, but I know one day I will have to say goodbye. I am wondering if anyone has any experience or advice on freeze drying technology versus cremation - the thought of never seeing him or being able to touch him is almost too much to bear, but I am concerned that it will make it more difficult to move on seeing him lifeless everyday. Any thoughts are greatly appreciated!

 

[di and bob]

i, myself, would not be able to handle seeing the lifeless body of the one I love. They are never the same because the 'essence', the spark of life that was their soul, has left and to see them would be a constant reminder of what I lost. Cremation would be my choice,  to be able to keep my little close by as I continue my life's journey. The past can never be changed or lived in again, we must go forward into the present and prepare for the future, but we will be forever grateful for the love we shared, and our precious memories and the bond we developed can never be taken from us. Use this time we have right now to love what we have and to store those beautiful moments to take out and examine and to hold on to when we are in need of them in our time of sorrow. The love we share will truly never  leave us, it just changes into a spiritual nature and continues.

 Keep a lock of his fur as a keepsake, use your precious memories to keep him alive in your heart, for as long as you remember him you will never lose what you meant to each other.    

 

[ty3535]

Thank you for the advice! I agree, my concern with the freeze drying was that it would be too hard to see him lifeless and unmoving. But I just can't fathom never seeing him again except in photos or videos and I'm worried if I have him cremated I'll regret not being able to see him. I am also worried that having him freeze dried would stop the grieving process. He'll surely never leave my heart but I'm not sure I could completely move forward or heal if I have him freeze dried and am constantly reminded that he's gone. Thanks again for your thoughts!

 

[danteshuman]

How about a cuddle clone now while you pet is young and healthy? I looked it up for my mom who still misses Sarah (and will one day be buried with Sarah's ashes.) Also many artist out there will paint exact copies of your your favorite pet pic. Love your pet while you can http://www.cuddleclones.com/ I hope you have many more years of happiness with your cat. *indoor kitties live a long time (16-22 years) your cat may be middle aged

 

[ty3535]

Ah! This is a great idea! I do have a pillow in his likeness but it's only one sided. The cuddle clone is a great idea. I am so happy to hear you say he could only be middle aged! I am hoping to have many more wonderful years. If I imagine a human person and whether or not it would be hard to see their lifeless body everyday I realize it would make it so much more difficult to get closure, if there is such a thing. I am afraid it would make it very difficult to move forward. Thank you so much!

 

[engine4154]

Although I know they're not for everyone, I and others here have had tattoos done of our lost loved ones. When my girl Bugs passed at 14 a couple years ago, I drew up a couple simple designs I thought would be good. Odd as it seems, I held them out to my cat Clyde and asked him 'which one'? He looked for a few minutes, then batted at the one I went with. She's always with me now.

My mother on the other hand had one that I gave her years ago cremated and keeps her ashes on a shelf in front of a picture I drew of her. We get attached to our little friends and whatever your choice, he or she will be remembered....

 

[catmomwi]

I have had several cats in my lifetime that I have held as they crossed the bridge.  Each one takes a piece of me with them, but even so I don't think I could handle seeing them stiff and lifeless hanging out around the house.  I have had them all cremated.  I have little pendants that I put a small amount of the cremains into and then have them buried.  That is what I chose to do, but it isn't for everyone.  I do have 2 pawprint tattoos for the ones I had in my life for over 15 years.  When it was time for them to cross, the vet helped me make the print.  By the time I went to pick them up 2-3 days later, I had the print inked on me.  To each their own, I guess.  

When it is my time, I have made it very clear that I want my pendants to go into the earth with me.

 

[donutte]

My neighbor across the street has done freeze drying/stuffing/whatever it is and to be honest, it freaks me out. When Sara died, she told my mom she'd put $100 toward doing it for Sara. While I know her intentions were to be helpful, it just didn't help at all at that point.

I've had many, many pets throughout my life. With the exception of the ones we couldn't afford to cremate over a ten-year span of time, they have all been cremated. It means I cannot see them as they were, but they were not just statues when alive. As it is, I see Lucky almost every day in his "nephews" (the kittens I adopted a few months before he died). I see Sara in some of the shelter cats I see where I volunteer (she was a dilute calico). And of course, all the pictures.

I can't imagine seeing them and having them not respond to me though. I think it would make me lose it, to be honest. If you feel it is something appropriate for you though, then that is your decision. It's something so personal - some people want to bury pets, which I can't fathom either because I need to know I can take them with me. But many still do it. You'll know what is right when the time comes. I think the important thing is to try and enjoy him now. I cried years before Lucky was gone thinking about that day, instead of enjoying him being there.

 

[kalikitty97]

My 10yo male is healthy and I certainly hope he stays that way for many years to come, but I know one day I will have to say goodbye. I am wondering if anyone has any experience or advice on freeze drying technology versus cremation - the thought of never seeing him or being able to touch him is almost too much to bear, but I am concerned that it will make it more difficult to move on seeing him lifeless everyday. Any thoughts are greatly appreciated!

I recently had to put down my dog and cat, and for both I got their paw prints. The place that does it puts their name on a gold plate and pushes it into a white circle clay mold, then pushes their paw print into it, and puts a bow on it. They are pretty cute, and I'm really glad I got them.

 

[roxanne76]

Memorializing (that's a word, right?) your pet is a very personal thing. I lost my two sweet kitties within about a year of each other. It was very difficult to say the least! I had each for just over 14 years and they each had a different type of cancer that quickly took them over.

I had each cremated and got a clay paw print done at each respective vet's office. I have tons of pictures and printed many to put in an album. I also found a shop on Etsy to have a necklace made with each of their paw prints etched onto it.

These have been very therapeutic for me and a great way to keep their memory alive. It has also been a respectful way to honor the joy they brought to my life.

Another thing to consider is cremation jewelry (keep a small amount of ashes in a small, metal container on a chain). I have seen nice, tasteful, affordable options on eBay (purchasing through a retailer is more expensive). It isn't for everybody, but something to consider as a part of the grieving process.

There are so many people that share this same experience! Talking to like-minded people is very helpful. I have to say there is a gaping hole in my heart after the loss of my pets, but the joy and fulfillment they gave me is priceless. Realizing this has helped and become more apparent in their absence.

Enjoy your sweet pet while they're here! Plan ahead, if you can, for their final expenses but try not to dwell on it. You'll be glad you did.