Foster Cat Doesn't Want To Be Alone

[Nfitz9]

Hi! I just need advice and reassurance I’m doing this right! I took in a stray mom cat and her four kittens in May. I have successfully found homes for the kittens and the last two left yesterday. Momma kitty is still here and crying because she doesn’t like being alone. I have 4 other cats so I cannot let her out of the bedroom. I go in frequently to sit with her and play with her but I can’t be there all the time. I feel like I’m not doing enough for her....is it detrimental to keep her in there by herself? What can I do? My cats are already stressed about her being here. She super sweet but I can’t keep her. Do I just ignore the meowing? I feel so bad for her now that the kittens are gone and she is alone. I have been moving her to another room during the day where she can look into the house through a french door with glass. Everytime one of my cats approaches the door she charges the glass and scares them off. Plus she seems more stressed in there than when she is in the room. I really don't want more cats, I'm at my limit with four. So I didn't want them to go through the stress of trying to accept a new one. The one time she did bolt out of the door when she was first here she jumped on my other cat and they fought. but I don't know if that's because the kittens were still here and she was in protective mode. I would just rather avoid any kind of cat fights and making my cat's unhappy. But I don't want her unhappy either while she's here. Just need advice on how to handle this until I can find her a home. Anybody ever been in this situation?

This is her...

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi! Goodness, she looks like such a sweetheart!!

Keeping her separated sounds like the best thing for all the cats involved, you're ok in that regard.

Are there any rescues in the area that might need a foster mama-cat?

I don't know if this will have any effect, but what if you tried some music from musicforcats . com?

Will she let you handle her? If so, maybe some chamomile tea might help - from @Mamanyt1953
try chamomile tea, which is gently calming without sedating. Grab a box of chamomile tea bags at the grocery store (coffee/tea aisle). This insures that you are getting only German chamomile (the English variety is toxic to cats, and pretty useless medicinally). Do make sure that it is pure chamomile, not one of the blends. Brew a cup, chill it, and administer via syringe, 1-3 teaspoonfuls up to 3 times a day. If your cat is over 10 pounds, you could safely go up to 3 Tablespoonfuls, 3 times a day.

 

[Nfitz9]

Hi! Thanks for the response I actually did put some music on for her today!! Music for cats on Pandora. I got her some new toys too. She seems a little calmer. She just cries so much when I leave the room. She settles back down after a while but it just breaks my heart. My son said she was crying in the middle of the night. His room is next to hers. I just want to make sure I'm not doing wrong by her. Hoping someone has been in this situation before with a word of reassurance that she will be fine until I find her a home.

 

[Jcatbird]

Yes! I have been through this. How old were the kittens? Weaned yet? If not then it will take her extra time to have a decrease in milk. If she isn’t neutered, do that. If she has been spayed then you could try letting your friendliest cat go and visit her in her territory. Make it a slow introduction in the room where she feels safest. Get the kitten stuff out first. She would have been aggressive with kittens there. Protective Mom mode. Maybe not as much now but still, meeting new kitties needs to be done slowly. A little visit here and there. It should help to settle the crying. I know you fon’t Want another kitty but having a guest kitty is not an earth shattering event for most cats. Once she is gone, your kitties will settle right down again. I can understand that you don’t want to get attached too. It’s hard not to. She really is going through something though. Hormones and missing babies too is very likely. The distraction of meeting others, and possibly finding a temporary cat friend, could really help her.
I’ve been through this myself. It is heartbreaking. I kept one of the kittens past weaning but Mom was a very good Mom and it was harder for her than most. The adoption group I worked with pushed for the kittens to get homes ata young age but I stood my ground lone enough to get Mom introduced to my other cats. It’s just harder for some Moms than for others. Poor kitty. You might also try letting her sleep with you at night. She needs comforting and I found this works great for the kitties I deal with. I know your cats probably sleep with you but, again, this is temporary and she is a kitty in need. You might be surprised to find that your kitties are empathic to her. Cats are very good at understanding if another cats is suffering. Mine often comfort others.
As Furballsmom suggested, she might me an excellent foster Mom for an abandoned litter. Cats like her are often lifesavers for litters in need. Even if she no longer nurses, she can offer nurturing which is a crucial role for kittens. My oldest and neutered female fostered an entire litter for me. She loved the babies and they loved her as though they had always been together. It was amazing and beautiful to see. You might call shelters, foster homes, etc. to see if there are some babies in need. It’s not always a match but it sounds like she is searching for kittens by calling them.
You have done a wonderful thing by helping these kitties. Thank you for doing that! I hope one of these suggestions will help. Please keep use posted.

Welcome to TCS!