Evee's leaving

[Mutation]

My cat, Evee, is dying im pretty sure. I think its cancer. I just need some tips on how to get through this. I've had her since I was a little girl, and shes always meant everything to me.
How do I not feel guilty about not spending more time with her? And not being nicer to her?
I cant be with her right now, it hurts too much. I know I will regret it but I cant handle it.

 

[klunick]

First off, I am so sorry you are going through this. Sounds very similar to when my two cats went in February and May of this year. I could tell that the end was near so I withdrew. I don't think they minded because they acted like they didn't want to be around anyone anyway. I think most animals would rather go off and be by themselves when they know the end is near. You are just protecting your heart from the inevitable which is perfectly normal.

 

[les26]

I am sorry that the end is coming close, the guilt is just the grief taking over you and playing head games and it will. We always look back and feel "I should've seen this coming and done something", "I should've spent more time with them" and other things because we are 100% responsible for their well being and when they die we feel that we have failed them but we do the best that we can with what we have at the time. The homeopathic remedy Ignatia Amara helps very much with grief, loss, shock etc. and has no side effects.

Dig deep and find the courage to be with her now and see her through and out of her pain, send her on to the next life where she will be pain free. It is damn tough to do, but you will be glad that you did down the line.

"Their last breath on Earth is their first breath in Heaven"

I hope that your heart heals a bit more each day, sorry this is happening, God Bless....

 

[di and bob]

Yes, I withdrew too when my Yammy was given a death sentence and didn't want to be near anyone. But a miracle happened and he is still here and when I see how much he follows me around and wants to be near me I feel ashamed and vow to be near when the inevitable happens. We CAN do better if given a chance. If you just can't be home nearby, make the time you are home count. Tell her how much she means to you, give her yummy treats and belly rubs.
There is ALWAYS guilt with grieving. No one is perfect. And you also cannot prepare your heart fro when the time comes, it will still break in two. Keep in mind that if it is cancer and the end is near, her suffering will be over. She will be at peace because she has your love. Since love is spiritual it will always be a part of you, it is eternal. The same for her. Although when she leaves she will take a part of your heart, she will leave a part of hers behind. Please share your anguish with those like us who understand, who have stood in your shes, it does help.
Make sure she is not ill from something curable, and if she is not, I recommend getting a pain reliever from the vet or from an online source. it will help in the final days, make her more comfortable. Make sure it is liquid and put the dose in the side of her mouth against the cheek so she doesn't choke.
My heart goes out to you, I'll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers. I will pray she goes softly into the night in her sleep......

 

[Mutation]

My mother is taking her to be euthanized right now. She got a lot worse overnight. We'll see if the vet can do anything to help her suffering, but if she can't then its best for her to be put down so she doesn't suffer. We're going to buy a burial plot for her but it doesn't help any. I regret not spending more time with her and being nicer to her. I wish I noticed everything earlier. I got to say goodbye and that I love her but I didn't get to hug her cause I was afraid of hurting her. I dont feel like it's my fault this happened though. Cats get old and things happen. I couldn't prevent her cancer and I couldn't prevent her dying. I just wish I spent my time with her better than I did. I guess if there's a bright side to any of this its a wake up call to spend more time with my pets that are still here. It doesn't change the fact that ill never see her again though. I'll never hear her walking down the hallway or see her getting so excited for her food again. She used to like to sleep in the bathroom and she became my little bathroom buddy. She would sleep on the kitchen rug too and in the chairs. We would always get mad at her cause she was in the way. Im going to miss getting mad at her and im going to miss seeing her in the bathroom.
I should have known she was deteriorating. She stopped grooming herself months ago and her fur started coming out in clumps. She didn't want as much attention as usual either. She was always so eager to eat though. Now all I have of her is the memory and pictures.

She seemed happy when my mother took her. I can take solace in that I guess.

 

[klunick]

My mother is taking her to be euthanized right now. She got a lot worse overnight. We'll see if the vet can do anything to help her suffering, but if she can't then its best for her to be put down so she doesn't suffer. We're going to buy a burial plot for her but it doesn't help any. I regret not spending more time with her and being nicer to her. I wish I noticed everything earlier. I got to say goodbye and that I love her but I didn't get to hug her cause I was afraid of hurting her. I dont feel like it's my fault this happened though. Cats get old and things happen. I couldn't prevent her cancer and I couldn't prevent her dying. I just wish I spent my time with her better than I did. I guess if there's a bright side to any of this its a wake up call to spend more time with my pets that are still here. It doesn't change the fact that ill never see her again though. I'll never hear her walking down the hallway or see her getting so excited for her food again. She used to like to sleep in the bathroom and she became my little bathroom buddy. She would sleep on the kitchen rug too and in the chairs. We would always get mad at her cause she was in the way. Im going to miss getting mad at her and im going to miss seeing her in the bathroom.
I should have known she was deteriorating. She stopped grooming herself months ago and her fur started coming out in clumps. She didn't want as much attention as usual either. She was always so eager to eat though. Now all I have of her is the memory and pictures.

She seemed happy when my mother took her. I can take solace in that I guess.

I know exactly how you feel with the regrets. I have so many about our last two cats as well as our last dog. I should have/could have done this or that. The only thing I could do was promise myself that I would "do better" the next time. I lucked out and two kittens dropped into my lap about two weeks after our last cat was put to sleep. I am trying to do better with them than I did with previous pets. That is all I can do.

Don't beat yourself up over any of this. You did what you thought was best and there is nothing you can change about it now. Your kitty knew she was loved by you and that is all that matters.

 

[di and bob]

I'm so sorry.....

 

[Mamanyt1953]

In the end, Evee knew she was loved, and your mother was with her. That's what matters most. And from That Place Where All Things Are Known, Evee KNOWS how much you loved her, and why you couldn't be there. She knows that there is nothing to forgive, and wants you to forgive yourself. Take heart, her love for you, translated and purified into Love, will be with you from now on. Because Love abides, always, forever, Love abides.