Does my cat not like me?

Mamanyt1953

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My girl is a lot like yours...and she, too, has a man whom she just LAVISHES attention on! She, too, follows me around, and can be found napping in whatever room I am in. Took me awhile to learn just how much she does love me, and to accept that simply being near me made her happy. After ELEVEN years, she will now (occasionally) jump in my lap for a nap. But I know now that we have something very special, maybe even more than we would have if she was a lovey-dovey kinda cat. Makes those times when she is affectionate SO very special!
 

calico man

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Of course she loves you! Lulu is the same way: she is not a lap cat, doesn't like a lot of petting, and will not hesitate to hiss, scratch, or bite if I do too much. But she's always by me, sleeps on my bed (sometimes), is very friendly and I know she loves me, just as your cat loves you!
 

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Maria Bayote

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Awws, your cat loves you - she does not just show it. :) Cats are an enigma. :)

My cat Bourbon is the most snobbish of all my cats. She does not like EVERYBODY but me. LOL. Nevertheless, she is not a lap cat and does not often want to be cuddled. I just force her sometimes, which would lead to scratch marks on my arms. :lol:
 

sargon

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Both my cats prefer to lay on me when I'm laying back, but wont' really sit in my lap. I call them my "belly babies", and one of them (by far the less naturally affectionate of the two(physically anyhow)) now will comr and climb on me on request ( usually), and sometimes unasked, but it took a lot of time, treats, and patience to get her to that point.

There are other signs a cat likes you than sittign in laps. Following you around and sleeping on the bed with you are both pretty much things cats only do if they like you a lot. Another is gazing at you with lidded eyes or slowly blinking at you. There are others, but, yes, your cat likes you. Did youa sk the sitter hwo they got your cat to rest on their chest, btw?
 
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huxleysmom

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Of course she loves you! Lulu is the same way: she is not a lap cat, doesn't like a lot of petting, and will not hesitate to hiss, scratch, or bite if I do too much. But she's always by me, sleeps on my bed (sometimes), is very friendly and I know she loves me, just as your cat loves you!
What a beauty! I’ve never had a calico or a long haired cat. I know all cats are not lap cats, what puzzles me is that she seems to be 2 different kinds of cats with me and him. Totally independent with me, and a lovey dovey lap cat with him. I just worried that she is a lap cat, but for some reason doesn’t feel comfortable with me.
 
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huxleysmom

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I asked him and he said « I let her come to me and go with the flow and she just comes to me » maybe he smells nice! Hahaha
Both my cats prefer to lay on me when I'm laying back, but wont' really sit in my lap. I call them my "belly babies", and one of them (by far the less naturally affectionate of the two(physically anyhow)) now will comr and climb on me on request ( usually), and sometimes unasked, but it took a lot of time, treats, and patience to get her to that point.

There are other signs a cat likes you than sittign in laps. Following you around and sleeping on the bed with you are both pretty much things cats only do if they like you a lot. Another is gazing at you with lidded eyes or slowly blinking at you. There are others, but, yes, your cat likes you. Did youa sk the sitter hwo they got your cat to rest on their chest, btw?
 
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huxleysmom

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I’l try that when I get home. She’s such a little weirdo full of contradictions. When I get home after work, she comes to me, rubs against my legs so I pick her up and pet her. She drools and purrs away and then bites my arm, jumps off and that’s it. She then spends the rest of the day at a safe distance.
Cats tend to pay attention to people who ignore them. They feel more secure. A person who pursues them makes them feel threatened. That is why a dog lover who comes to visit has the cat on their lap, they feel nonthreatened!
 

daisyd

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I feel your pain ! Gracie has a very bad attitude haha I’ve had her since a few weeks old prior to that think she must have been raised by tigers !! She is not nice to anyone which I suppose is something. I’m the only one who can pick her up and cuddle her (for a second mind and think she only does as knows I feed her and clean her litter ). A colleague at work recently got an 11 week old female kitten - I warned her she may not be a lap cat etc... well her kitten is adorable - sits on her lap the lot !! Although her kitten stayed with her mum cat and siblings until my colleague got her . I think regardless all cats like us are different ! I do laugh about her attitude and I tell her it stinks lol . Only time she has got on my lap and kneaded was when I came back from a week’s holiday . A mate came and fed her however app she just hid the whole time . She was lovely for a few days when I returned then turned into her sassy self !!
 

KarenKat

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I was actually in an opposite situation - my roommate had a cat and when I moved in she started sleeping with me at night instead of him. He definitely did things to annoy her - for example he would pet her in a silly way but she loved pets so she’d stay and just not enjoy everything he did (nothing bad, just silly). I think I was more “polite” and so she came to me at night. There was no doubt she loved him and was happiest with him, but maybe she liked my bed better, or he moved more in his sleep or whatever.

Sounds like if your kitty isn’t big on being pet, not petting her at all until she asks you too might work in establishing more trust. She definitely loves you, and it sounds like she will likely get to cuddling you in time. If she wasn’t happy with you she wouldn’t follow you at all.
 

Meme chan

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your cat sound so much like my cat meme ..she came to our house very aggressive ....not touchy cat ...even after sometime with us she still dislike to sit on my lap and still play rough no cuddling ..am not an expert but from my personal experience if your cat follows you it means she trust you enough ..i think your cat likes to be around you . they don't need to act like another cat ...they have different personality our other cats they are very playful and softie compared to meme but all love us the same but express it differently i am sure.
as for affection that your cat express to other person i dont have a clue but i noticed meme does the same thing with my father... she is very happy and glued to my father whenever hes around its like she becomes a different cat. she becomes cuddly and playful only with him .. am not sure what it is but all i know when she needs something or she's unwell she comes to me and meow continuously.. so i guess some cats do behave like that sometimes.
 

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My girl Cricket wouldn't get on my lap if that was the only place left in the world to sit. She's also rather independent, but I know she loves me. Right now she's sitting on the couch next to me while I sit at the computer table, and purring because I petted her.
 

Jen2massage

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Please don't think that your cat doesn't like you! My orange tabby girl is the same way. She does NOT like to be held. I can hold our latest adoptee, a very damaged shelter rescue, longer than I can hold my girl of 4 years now. She is not a lap cat at all. She really only jumps on the bed to wake me up when I've overslept for breakfast. She'll even give me a little nip at the ankle if I"m taking too long. But its the most gentle little nip, it's actually cute. lol! But with all that being said, my girl was rescued from a feral colony. We don't know her full background. Was she abandoned? Abused? A run away? We have no idea. But outside of her standoffishness, she is the sweetest, most chill, laid back cat ever and she is great with her little brother. All she wants is food, a sunny spot, and comfy chair to nap in. So, I would ask, do you know your cats background? Maybe she's bored and unstimulated? It could be any number of things. But I am certain she loves you. :)
 

Lillyenn

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To be honest I can't cuddle with my girl either. She likes to follow me around and she likes petting very much. Sometimes if I'm lucky she lays at my feet, but if I get too close to her face she runs away. My boy Kumi likes to cuddle, and I can hold him when I need to, but he never layed on my lap. My kitten however is currently laying on my chest purring. Different cats, different personalities. It doesn't sound like your cat dislikes you, cats are vulnerable when they are sleeping, so liking to sleep close to you might be a sign of trust. She even wakes you for pets, that's not something that a cat would do to someone they don't like. Maybe she just needs some time. Also I know that a bunch of people could prove me wrong, but in my experience boys are always cuddlier. My grandma had a lot of cats but the ones that I remember hugging were always boys. Oh and about your friend, there are people who just attract cats like magnets. I don't know why, maybe It's their scent, personality or energy, maybe your kitty feels something that she finds calming.
 
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huxleysmom

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Update:
I’ve been back a little over 10 days now and I have been trying very hard.... well, at not trying very hard. In other words, I am leaving Sophie alone and let her decide when and how she wants to interact with me. The last couple of days, she’s been joining me on the couch in the evening when I watch TV. Progress. :)
 

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