Discouraged and a bit sad...

[Tabbycattracks]

This is my first post, although I've been lurking & reading awhile. I bought my first home back in January. At the time, I moved in with my 2 cats of about 8 years (one is 9 and the other 11). I told myself I would not adopt anymore cats unless I came across one that I felt needed me. It didn't take long......Albert was scared, shut down, and depressed at the shelter & needed someone to give him a chance (the same shelter my other 2 boys came from). His photos pulled at my heartstrings and with a spare room, I decided I could give him that chance. Right before I was to bring him home, the shelter staff found blood on the walls of his cage. A trip to the vet found he had gunky ears, but ear cytology revealed little to go on. If I remember correctly, they also checked his skin around the wounds. He was given ear drops and antibiotics and a steroid (I think) to try and clear up his face. They also put an e collar on him (which he would get out of at night). I think the shelter did their best to get him healed before I took him home.
I've had him for almost a month and a half now & he's still scratching (the shelter wondered if it might be stress related which is why I didn't immediately take him back to the vet). I also think he's semi feral as he is very afraid of me. He did let me approach him and sit on the floor near him, but would hiss or swat at me if I got too close. I've been sitting with him and reading to him and leaving treats near him to eat....and he has been responding. I can now occasionally touch his feet & he will play with a feather wand toy if I am sitting on the ground and he is in the shallow closet where he feels safe. Still....I am a long way away from being able to actually pet him. Many of the stories here have given me hope that he could come around and eventually be part of our little family...
I'm discouraged, however, because I still have to figure out how to get his face to heal. I have a vet appointment on Monday for him and I'm worried about getting him into a carrier and thru the appointment without terrifying him. The vet has said they will likely sedate him to examine him, so I don't really think I should give him anything beforehand (I do have some Gabapentin that was prescribed during a previous conversation from the vet that saw him when he was with the shelter). I wanted so badly to help a cat that needed me, but I really wasn't prepared to take on a cat that was both untouchable AND had a medical problem. I'm telling myself that I'm trying to do my best for this little guy ~ but at the same time~ feeling overwhelmed like I've bitten off more than I can chew. I'm praying that my (new) vet will be able to get to the bottom of his scratching. The treatment will be something I can do with little to no handling....and mostly...that this poor little guy doesn't hate me for the rest of his life and decide to spend it living in the closet of my spare bedroom. I'm not normally one to put a lot of my woes out there, but I'm hoping someone will read this and have something encouraging to say that will help. I'm so sad and discouraged right now . Im not really sure how to post pics from my cell phone (I don't own a computer)....but Albert's photo is my profile pic if anyone wants a face to go with the story.

 

[Kieka]

With fearful and/or feral cats, time and patience are key. That he is playing and allow some contact is a good sign. My girl was feral and fearful when I got her. It took several months for her to feel comfortable enough to allow petting without shying away. But step by step and day by day she got a little more comfortable. I celebrated every little small victory. The day she allowed me to pet her while I was standing, the day she felt comfortable enough to eat in front of me, the day she let me pet her with two hands instead of one. She's been with me for six years now and completely trusts me. She still hates being picked up, but that's the next little step we are working towards. She is now my velcro kitty who loves laps and will allow some tummy pets in the right situation.

As to the vet. My girl still hates the vet but it is a necessary evil. It will feel like backwards progress but you do have to just get him to the vet. I'd call your vet and ask if you can give him the Gabapentin before the appointment. If you can't, then a towel will help get him in the carrier. I'd bring extra towels, wipes and a bottle of water in case their are any carrier accidents (some cats pee or pooh in the carrier and since he is a new to you cat, you wouldn't know for sure yet). This time, it may take a few days to regain any backwards progress. But it will get better. With my girl I am only the worst mom in the whole wide world for a few hours. Then I am forgiven.

You might want to look into those treat tunes or other options. Sometimes food can be the best way to a fearful cats heart.

 

[Jcatbird]

I had not intended to get on site tonight but I saw your post and felt I must answer you. Please do not despair. You have been drawn to him for a reason, he really needs you. I have only had true ferals for many years now. Each one traumatized and a great many were sick in ways I never imagined. I didn’t dream when I rescued them from the swamp that I was biting off so much. Still, now that I am on the other side of the rescues, I wouldn’t change a thing. The rewards have been huge.
start now to get him used to taking treats and his favorite foods in a carrier. Do this from now on. Make his carrier a sanctuary for life. It takes time to establish this but all my ferals ( now mostly social) use their carriers as their homes inside my home. The doors are always open to their carrier and they go there when stressed. It makes life easier for us. If you need to start by putting the carrier inside a larger box that is laying on it’s side, try that.
Life in a shelter often leaves cats unsure of what comes next. Give him lots of time. He has just been beamed into a whole new world and everything is different. Cats need to know their world to feel safe. He will get there. Just keep loving him, spending time sitting on the floor of laying on it with him. Let him investigate and learn what all the new smells, sounds and sights will mean for him. Slow and steady. Call the vet if you think you need to use anything to calm him before hand. You might also try things like putting Feliway in the carrier or even catnip. I’ll check back when I am back on site again. I needed to be away for a bit but I will be back. Don’t give up! You can do this.

 

[maggie101]

This is my cat's story so everything will work out in time. Thanks for rescuing him! Once he is better he will be happy to have a home

I took care of a sweet loving stray outside. One day she was very excited about something. She kept rubbing against me and meowing. Then, 2 kittens popped out from the bushes. A few days later I could tell the mama cat was very upset about something. Someone had taken one of her kittens-CoCo. The brother got adopted and a rescue took the mama cat and her second litter of 4. A year later CoCo showed up on my porch 1 yr old. Soon after, she had a litter of 5 that were adopted. A friend helped me get TNR done on her and her bff, a male cat. She was outside for 2 yrs.A neighbor took the male cat and left CoCo alone. A few days later I took her in by grabbing by the scruff of the neck then she immediately started purring. First 3 months she lived under my couch. Now she will not leave my bedroom. I have had her a over a yr. I can see why some shelters do not want kittens adopted til they're 12 weeks old. CoCo does not defend herself when my cats hiss and growl at her. She does not hiss back or stand on her haunches. No reaction at all. Just quivers her tail and hides. I even took her to the vet to have her eyes and ears checked. She is fine. When I go to bed she rubs against my face and wraps her body around my neck. Then she kneads her paws and purrs for a long time. CoCo will eat next to my cats in my kitchen then back to the bedroom. Could be she does not know how to defend herself so she goes where she feel safe.. Hopefully by 2019 she will leave my bedroom on her own.

She no longer stays in my bedroom and sleep on the couch that Maggie's on. Still scared of her. Coco and Peaches play together. She will chase her!

It's been 5 years. She has never hissed or growled. Still afraid of Maggie. She is very territorial

 

[Meowmee]

This is my first post, although I've been lurking & reading awhile. I bought my first home back in January. At the time, I moved in with my 2 cats of about 8 years (one is 9 and the other 11). I told myself I would not adopt anymore cats unless I came across one that I felt needed me. It didn't take long......Albert was scared, shut down, and depressed at the shelter & needed someone to give him a chance (the same shelter my other 2 boys came from). His photos pulled at my heartstrings and with a spare room, I decided I could give him that chance. Right before I was to bring him home, the shelter staff found blood on the walls of his cage. A trip to the vet found he had gunky ears, but ear cytology revealed little to go on. If I remember correctly, they also checked his skin around the wounds. He was given ear drops and antibiotics and a steroid (I think) to try and clear up his face. They also put an e collar on him (which he would get out of at night). I think the shelter did their best to get him healed before I took him home.
I've had him for almost a month and a half now & he's still scratching (the shelter wondered if it might be stress related which is why I didn't immediately take him back to the vet). I also think he's semi feral as he is very afraid of me. He did let me approach him and sit on the floor near him, but would hiss or swat at me if I got too close. I've been sitting with him and reading to him and leaving treats near him to eat....and he has been responding. I can now occasionally touch his feet & he will play with a feather wand toy if I am sitting on the ground and he is in the shallow closet where he feels safe. Still....I am a long way away from being able to actually pet him. Many of the stories here have given me hope that he could come around and eventually be part of our little family...
I'm discouraged, however, because I still have to figure out how to get his face to heal. I have a vet appointment on Monday for him and I'm worried about getting him into a carrier and thru the appointment without terrifying him. The vet has said they will likely sedate him to examine him, so I don't really think I should give him anything beforehand (I do have some Gabapentin that was prescribed during a previous conversation from the vet that saw him when he was with the shelter). I wanted so badly to help a cat that needed me, but I really wasn't prepared to take on a cat that was both untouchable AND had a medical problem. I'm telling myself that I'm trying to do my best for this little guy ~ but at the same time~ feeling overwhelmed like I've bitten off more than I can chew. I'm praying that my (new) vet will be able to get to the bottom of his scratching. The treatment will be something I can do with little to no handling....and mostly...that this poor little guy doesn't hate me for the rest of his life and decide to spend it living in the closet of my spare bedroom. I'm not normally one to put a lot of my woes out there, but I'm hoping someone will read this and have something encouraging to say that will help. I'm so sad and discouraged right now . Im not really sure how to post pics from my cell phone (I don't own a computer)....but Albert's photo is my profile pic if anyone wants a face to go with the story.

First ty so much for saving him. The shelter should have told you that he was untouchable if they didn’t. I think in time as others have said he will come around. Just give him lots and lots of time and don’t force anything. I have heard ignoring such a cat can work as well because no cat likes to be ignored and it will peak their curiosity. So you could go into his room and do something other than focusing only on him.

Since he likes food what you are doing already is working. And he is already letting you touch him so that is great progress! I have kitties outside I have been caring for for several years now who still run from me and will not get too close. One recently though actually touched his nose to my finger 2-3 weeks ago when I held it out for him while he was eating from a plate I had just put out by the door. That was a huge step for him but now he is back to his usual and runs away etc.


I second giving him somewhere to hide like a carrier where he feels safe. Others have used a small room with one area closed off somewhat with a box and towels, so he has his safe place to go when he needs to. I am not sure about getting him into the carrier but using the carrier as his safe place should help a lot by putting treats in etc. When I have done tnr with not touchable cats I have them in a drop trap at first which the carrier can be attached to and then I can sort of herd them into the carrier part with a divider without too much stress and without getting injured.

I took in my Merlin one of my outdoor cats who was a dumped cat about 2.5 yrs ago. It was a long ordeal, although he was letting me pet him etc. and taming and being very affectionate outside he bit me in the middle of all of it and had to be quarantined etc. I persevered, trained him not to bite and he is the biggest love bug now. He gets tummy rubs, hugs, toothpaste on his teeth, he loves wrestling with his brother and is such a sweetie. I never thought it work between him and Quinn but they are very close now. They groom each other and often sleep together.

Do you know his history at all? Was he an outdoor cat? If not, he may have had some trauma other than that of being abandoned etc. once you can eventually intro him to your other kitties that may help him to feel safer as well.

Try not to stress yourself out too much, somehow it will all work out, you will get him in the carrier, get him to dvm, his itching etc will reside and or be treated somehow and he will adjust to his new great home in time.

As for his nerves I recommend trying catnip in the carrier, pheromone spray and an article of your clothing and put a wee pad in the bottom of the carrier, I do that for all my kitties now every dvm visit and I put a towel and wee pad on the car seat too. The gabapentin sounds like a good idea too, just add it to a tiny bit of tasty food before you plan to take him. If it helps calm him it could help him with his overall adjustment as well. Rescue remedy helps some kitties as well. Good luck

 

[Moka]

With fearful and/or feral cats, time and patience are key. That he is playing and allow some contact is a good sign. My girl was feral and fearful when I got her. It took several months for her to feel comfortable enough to allow petting without shying away. But step by step and day by day she got a little more comfortable. I celebrated every little small victory. The day she allowed me to pet her while I was standing, the day she felt comfortable enough to eat in front of me, the day she let me pet her with two hands instead of one. She's been with me for six years now and completely trusts me. She still hates being picked up, but that's the next little step we are working towards. She is now my velcro kitty who loves laps and will allow some tummy pets in the right situation.

As to the vet. My girl still hates the vet but it is a necessary evil. It will feel like backwards progress but you do have to just get him to the vet. I'd call your vet and ask if you can give him the Gabapentin before the appointment. If you can't, then a towel will help get him in the carrier. I'd bring extra towels, wipes and a bottle of water in case their are any carrier accidents (some cats pee or pooh in the carrier and since he is a new to you cat, you wouldn't know for sure yet). This time, it may take a few days to regain any backwards progress. But it will get better. With my girl I am only the worst mom in the whole wide world for a few hours. Then I am forgiven.

You might want to look into those treat tunes or other options. Sometimes food can be the best way to a fearful cats heart.

Just to add to what Kieka said about bringing extra towels, wipes and water to the vet . . . I also add a few trash bags and human hand wipes to my kitty "diaper bag". It sucks to have to clean up a mess, have no where to put the used towels and have to drive home with gross hands. Any little thing to make a vet trip less stressful, right?

 

[silent meowlook]

Didn’t read replies. Give him the Gabapentin 2 hours before you have to put him in the carrier. Start putting his food in the carrier now to get him used to it.

 

[dustydiamond1]

Bless you for saving this dear little kitty. You are doing great, hang in there .

We were unbelievably lucky with our former stray Gypsy so I don't really have any advice but just want to lend moral support and send good vibes to you and your kittys.. I've read all replies and you have gotten some most excellent advice. I would ask the vet prior to giving the Gabapentin since you think they will sedate him. I'd picked up some ThunderWunders Cat Calming Paw Gel to help during the fireworks and it worked great. You don't need to give much and Gypsy loves the salmon flavor.
Your avatar photo is great, Albert is very handsome.
Gypsy is crazy over Sheba meat sticks (our Walmart carries them) and the Inabra Churu (I get from Amazon) I use to give her probiotics with.
Take care and keep us updated.

 

[Tabbycattracks]

Good Evening Everyone ♡
First, let me say a HUGE Thank You to each and every one of you who took the time to read and reply to my post. Your words helped me feel a lot better! I do not come from a cat loving family, so the majority of my family members think I'm absolutely off my rocker to want to take on a cat like Albert. I have a big heart though, & actually went to school to be a Vet Tech (sadly, due to low wages, I've been out of the profession for over 20 years).
Tomorrow is Vet Day...and frankly, I'm nervous. I'm not sure who will be more stressed.. me or Little Bert (I feel like a traitor ).I'm praying I can wait him out in the morning & lure him into the carrier with food. I'm not afraid to use a towel and gloves to push him in, I just don't want to go that route if I don't have to because of the stress it will cause him.
I DID go out and get some puppy pads for the carrier today and will take extra towels and wipes~ so Thank You for that suggestion.
I wish I knew more about Albert's history. The only thing I know is that he came into the shelter as a stray with another cat (whom they called "Fat Albert." I was told that Fat Albert was adopted previously and was a lot more social than my little guy. I do secretly wonder, if they looked alike...are perhaps related....and may even have been bonded...which could explain how shut down Little Albert is. It's all speculation of course). I will say this shelter is No kill and I have seen them do phenomenal work in saving animals. I have a lot of respect for them. My other two cats also came from them. I do know that they had Albert for approx 3 mos before putting him up for adoption. They DID handle him..and although he would hiss and back away~ he never offered to bite (at least until the day I picked him up). He did bite at the person trying to put him in the carrier, but only got the blanket. He'd been to the vet 3 times in the previous few weeks, so nobody really blamed him. When they brought him out to me in the carrier~ I'd never seen a cat shake so bad. It literally broke my heart!
Since he's been with me, seeing some of the fear leave his expressions has been a huge reward! I guess that is why I am so apprehensive about the vet tomorrow. He does have his own room in my house with plenty of toys, his own litterbox, a couple square tent houses, a partially covered sleeping bed, a vertical & horizontal scratchers (the horizontal one is actually a perch he can sit on). My tiny desk is in the same room, so he also enjoys hanging out on my desk chair from time to time. He also has 2 windows he can sit near, one of which has a bird feeder outside for birdwatching. He has interacted with my resident cats only under the door. I've had people tell me to introduce them because they may help him trust me more easily....but not being able to predictably handle him~ I am leery of giving him access to the rest of the house. I also want to make introductions very slowly to ensure the best chance they will all get along. I have been swapping toys and plan to do beds soon to help them get used to each others' scents. I eventually want to feed all of them on either side of the door to Albert's room...but Bert isn't yet comfortable eating too far away from his closet.
As far as the Gabapentin goes, I could give him one before the appointment, but since the vet said they would likely want to sedate him to examine him, I don't think it's a good idea. I'm actually hoping they do sedate him before examining him as I feel it will be less stressful. I will try to update again tomorrow after we are done with the vet. Thank You again for all of your wonderful comments!

 

[dustydiamond1]

Playing under door footsies is so cute.Go slow with instructions, you can find great advice right here on TCS. I think it was Jcatbird who put a screen door on one of her inside bedroom doors for introductions. Others have used baby gates one atop of the other. What time is the vet visit? Will you have time to call and ask about the Gabapentin or pick up some of the calming gel? If you could handle him the technique called Blind Superman is the least traumatic loading I've ever seen. I found it on you tube almost 5yrs ago when I was researching how to get Gypsy loaded solo the first time (only the 2nd time loading her at all) All the videos were so stressful on the cat as well as the human that it is a real breath of fresh air. It can still be found on youtube. I can't remember the Veterinarians name.
So sad they were parted if they were truly bonded. Is Fat Albert still at the shelter? Try not to fret too much, you'll do fine and he will pick up on your stress.

 

[Tabbycattracks]

Well, I was able to get Albert into the carrier. It wasn't pretty. ....and I'm sitting here, crying because I feel so bad for him. I put the mouth of the carrier into the closet with food in it. I didn't give him an evening meal last night, so he'd be hungry. I read to him and waited. At one point, I got up to check on him and he jumped over the carrier and out into the room. At this point, I put long sleeves and gloves on, and tried to catch him with a towel. He ran around the room scared & jumped into the (closed) window twice. He finally went back into the closet. I used a plastic box and another carrier to put barriers around him so that the only place he could go was into the open carrier. With a little urging (and hissing), he went in. While I'm relieved I can get him to the vet now~ I want to cry at the same time. I'm shaking myself as I write this. I still have a little over an hour before leaving for the appointment, so I left the carrier in the room and covered it...hoping that he will settle down & hopefully eat something before we have to leave. I'm writing this because I need something to do.....my head is spinning. I feel like all the work I've done with him just went out the window

 

[dustydiamond1]

Well, I was able to get Albert into the carrier. It wasn't pretty. ....and I'm sitting here, crying because I feel so bad for him. I put the mouth of the carrier into the closet with food in it. I didn't give him an evening meal last night, so he'd be hungry. I read to him and waited. At one point, I got up to check on him and he jumped over the carrier and out into the room. At this point, I put long sleeves and gloves on, and tried to catch him with a towel. He ran around the room scared & jumped into the (closed) window twice. He finally went back into the closet. I used a plastic box and another carrier to put barriers around him so that the only place he could go was into the open carrier. With a little urging (and hissing), he went in. While I'm relieved I can get him to the vet now~ I want to cry at the same time. I'm shaking myself as I write this. I still have a little over an hour before leaving for the appointment, so I left the carrier in the room and covered it...hoping that he will settle down & hopefully eat something before we have to leave. I'm writing this because I need something to do.....my head is spinning. I feel like all the work I've done with him just went out the window

You did what you had to do in order to eventually make things better for him so please don't feel bad.

 

[dustydiamond1]

Take a deep breath and try to stay calm. If you're upset Albert will stay upset. Dont fret he will forgive you once he starts feeling better.

 

[Kieka]

We have all had those moments with our furry family members.

My rabbit had surgery two weeks ago and I had to grab him to syringe feed him every 4 hours for 4 days during his recovery. My rabbit is not used to being picked up and really does not like it. He was a rescue who spent the first 3 to 5 years of his life very neglected with very little positive human interaction. After a few years with us he will run up to us for treats and pets but it took a while to get there. He was literally shaking, grinding his teeth and grunting at me when I would catch him. While he fed pretty good most of the time, sometimes he really fought me on it. Luckily, he never tried to take a chunk out of me. But I really had to take a step back and calm down between catching him and feeding him because otherwise the feeding part was too stressful for both of us as well. It took about 5 days after the last syringe feeding but my bunny is now approaching me again when I go into his area (and of course today he has to go back to get his stitches out so we will go backwards again for a few days).

Deep breaths. Take a step back to collect yourself. I know how backwards it will feel but you will get past it. Sometimes we have to force the things they need for their overall better good. Just be open with your vet about the trouble handling/trips so that you can ensure a treatment plan that takes it into account.

 

[Tabbycattracks]

You folks are wonderful! Thanks again for the encouraging words. I'm a bit calmer now just sitting and reading stuff on my phone. Its probably good that I got him in his carrier early, so we didn't have to immediately get in the car and start driving. I peeked in on him a few ago, and he was just sitting calmly in the carrier. No shaking & not looking too fearful. I just want to get this over with and get him back to hanging out in his room happy & feeling safe

 

[Tabbycattracks]

Just got back from the vet. Albert did very well...not a peep in the car and he even let the vet staff take him out of the carrier without much fuss. They did sedate him at my request to do a thorough exam. The new vet is great BTW~ very happy with them!
They discovered lesions going from the top part of his ear, down to the edge of his mouth . His ears were very clean and healthy (as I suspected). Based on everything from the previous vet visit (when the shelter took him) she thinks we are either dealing with an allergy, an eosinophilic granuloma, or least likely~ a tooth issue. She noticed he has a Crack in a bottom tooth and a missing tooth on the top jaw that recently fell out.
For now, we are going to treat with a strong steroid & an Antibiotic injection (stronger than previously given)and watch for improvement for a couple weeks. We will then touch base and go from there. Poor Bert was so happy to get back to his room...when I opened the carrier~ he made a beeline for his closet. Poor little guy! Going to let him have some quiet time for the rest of the afternoon
I'm praying this helps and doesn't turn into a lot of visits and checkups. This morning was stressful enough!!

 

[dustydiamond1]

How are you all doing?

 

[Tabbycattracks]

How are you all doing?

So far, so good....Bert hasn't been scratching that I can see, so my fingers are crossed that the treatment is helping him.
Unfortunately, he is also keeping more distance from me and he hisses a LOT more if I walk into the room when he's out on the desk chair or his scratch table. I know that I stressed him out a lot by cornering him into the carrier and he's still scared. I'm hoping that routine vet trips won't be a regular thing or I fear he'll never make any progress into a housecat. I'm sitting with him and trying to give him as many positive interactions as I can. I'm telling myself that time and patience will heal
Thank You for asking! I'm enjoying this site tremendously, although I lurk more than post...

 

[dustydiamond1]

So far, so good....Bert hasn't been scratching that I can see, so my fingers are crossed that the treatment is helping him.
Unfortunately, he is also keeping more distance from me and he hisses a LOT more if I walk into the room when he's out on the desk chair or his scratch table. I know that I stressed him out a lot by cornering him into the carrier and he's still scared. I'm hoping that routine vet trips won't be a regular thing or I fear he'll never make any progress into a housecat. I'm sitting with him and trying to give him as many positive interactions as I can. I'm telling myself that time and patience will heal
Thank You for asking! I'm enjoying this site tremendously, although I lurk more than post...

Since you are a member I don't think you are lurking, rather you are browsing. I do the same and chime in when I think I can be supportive or helpful. There are lots of sites you could post photos of your kittys, we LOVE photos. Can you rig something up so Bert can see you interacting with your other kittys? What are their names? you can post photos of them here if you like. I don't know what to say about the hissing, Gypsy has only hissed once in all the time we've been together and that was at another cat. Did you try offering the Sheba meat sticks?

 

[tarasgirl06]

So far, so good....Bert hasn't been scratching that I can see, so my fingers are crossed that the treatment is helping him.
Unfortunately, he is also keeping more distance from me and he hisses a LOT more if I walk into the room when he's out on the desk chair or his scratch table. I know that I stressed him out a lot by cornering him into the carrier and he's still scared. I'm hoping that routine vet trips won't be a regular thing or I fear he'll never make any progress into a housecat. I'm sitting with him and trying to give him as many positive interactions as I can. I'm telling myself that time and patience will heal
Thank You for asking! I'm enjoying this site tremendously, although I lurk more than post...

Go slow, give him time, be patient, and offer him rewards when he comes out of his shell and approaches you, or lets you approach him without swatting or growling. He's scared. He's having to make huge changes in his life!