Cruel or kind to bring “stray” home for weekend

[Fortheloveofavoid]

Hi, I”m new to the group, and wanted to reach out to fellow cat lovers about a dilemma I‘m faced with. I’ll try to keep the backstory short. I’ve been looking after strays & ferals at our office since Jan 2020. Last year, a black male cat started coming to the yard, visibly neglected. He was friendly, exceptionally sweet, and needless to say, I fell desperately in love with him (Black Fury). He and I have bonded over the months, the major problem is that I have a firm “no pet policy” on my rental. Over Memorial Day weekend, I noticed he had hurt his leg, so I brought him home with me, to monitor his condition, so that I could react quickly and get him to an emergency vet if I needed to. He acted as any cat would to new surroundings; slightly fearful, but curious. He slept in my bed with me both nights, (he is a velcro cat). His leg was fine by Tuesday, so I returned him to his home at the office. (He has access inside my office 24/7 via an open window). He seemed genuinely happy to be back in a familiar space, but I know that he misses me when I’m not around.

My boy is a very sensitive, shy cat, and with 4th July coming up next week (and hurricane season - I live in NE Florida), I am incredibly fearful that he may panic, and run across the road to a neighboring houses’ crawlspace or end up in some other situation that could expose him to danger. My office is too small to restrain him, and without having someone around to calm him, I think it would freak him out, so I don’t know if keeping him locked in the office is the best choice. I could of course, just leave him be, and hope for the best. Then the other option is bringing him home with me again, and risk breaking his routine and stressing him out with the car ride etc. In addition, as he has been neglected/rejected in the past, will me returning him to the office each time, after having him at my home for a weekend, bring back past trauma for him?

It goes without saying that I would love to have him with me over the weekend, but I want to do what’s right by him, and I’d appreciate your thoughts on what the best way is to handle this situation. I do have intent to have him live with me full time, I just need to ride out my rental contract till next year. TY.

 

[Noelle_W]

If the office window is open, he can go there for refuge--which I think is likely. On the other hand, if you took him home for the holiday, that would be good too--since you've already done that once and it will become more familar to him. I feel like the more you bond with him, the better because eventually I have a feeling (or hope) that you will get a new apartment that allows pets or find your own home. Then, he will become all yours. It sounds like he has already adopted you. He is lucky to have you.

 

[neely]

Welcome to TCS! Bless you for looking after Black Fury and taking the time to care for his needs. I understand how this can be a dilemma for you. Since your rental contract does not expire until next year that's still quite a ways off. I think I know the answer to this but is it possible to contact the landlord and explain you will only be living there for X number of months? On the one hand, bringing him back and forth for a weekend at a time is confusing for him as is restraining him in your small office. Do you have a friend or relative that would be willing to bring him to their house for you? That way you could regularly visit until your rental contract is up and he could come live with you permanently. I wish you the best of luck, please keep us posted on your progress.

 

[Fortheloveofavoid]

If the office window is open, he can go there for refuge--which I think is likely. On the other hand, if you took him home for the holiday, that would be good too--since you've already done that once and it will become more familar to him. I feel like the more you bond with him, the better because eventually I have a feeling (or hope) that you will get a new apartment that allows pets or find your own home. Then, he will become all yours. It sounds like he has already adopted you. He is lucky to have you.

Thank you so much, and I’m so lucky to have him, yes, absolutely I have full intention to move to a home that allows pets. I’m actually counting the days till he can live with me. He has gotten better at staying in the yard, and utilizing my office for refuge, but if there is too much activity in & around my office or loud noises (we own a paint company, so crew come & go, and we sometimes work on our pressure washers on the property), I noticed that he still has the inclination to run to a more secure area. Sadly, that area is across an (albeit quiet) road, but it’s a road just the same. I’ve been working on de-sensitizing him to loud noises, he has made such good progress, but he still gets spooked. I am hoping, (if I make the decision), that like you said, he will feel more familiar at my home considering that he has been there before.

 

[Fortheloveofavoid]

Welcome to TCS! Bless you for looking after Black Fury and taking the time to care for his needs. I understand how this can be a dilemma for you. Since your rental contract does not expire until next year that's still quite a ways off. I think I know the answer to this but is it possible to contact the landlord and explain you will only be living there for X number of months? On the one hand, bringing him back and forth for a weekend at a time is confusing for him as is restraining him in your small office. Do you have a friend or relative that would be willing to bring him to their house for you? That way you could regularly visit until your rental contract is up and he could come live with you permanently. I wish you the best of luck, please keep us posted on your progress.

Thank you! I know, it seems like an eternity till my lease expires… We have tried broaching the topic with our property manager, but the owners, who are lovely people, unfortunately, are very set in their way. I agree, the constant back & forth is confusing for him, he is just so deserving of love and stability. My husband & I moved to the USA in 2019, sadly haven’t made any friends yet, well none that we’d feel comfortable asking, and my MIL, well, she’s not exactly someone that likes cats, so I certainly would not trust her to be nice to him. I promise to keep you updated.

 

[neely]

My husband & I moved to the USA in 2019, sadly haven’t made any friends yet, well none that we’d feel comfortable asking, and my MIL, well, she’s not exactly someone that likes cats, so I certainly would not trust her to be nice to him. I promise to keep you updated.

I hope you are able to make new friends soon regardless whether you are able to find someone you trust for Black Fury. It was shortly after 2019 when the pandemic hit so I can understand not meeting people. Sorry your MIL is not a cat lover but either was mine. I'll try to keep brainstorming and let you know if I have another idea.

 

[Fortheloveofavoid]

I hope you are able to make new friends soon regardless whether you are able to find someone you trust for Black Fury. It was shortly after 2019 when the pandemic hit so I can understand not meeting people. Sorry your MIL is not a cat lover but either was mine. I'll try to keep brainstorming and let you know if I have another idea.

Much appreciated!

 

[Mamanyt1953]

I, also, will be wracking my brain for possibilities. And thank you so much for all you have done for this cat. It made my heart sing.

 

[Fortheloveofavoid]

I, also, will be wracking my brain for possibilities. And thank you so much for all you have done for this cat. It made my heart sing.

Thank you, really appreciate it.