Complaints From Downstairs Neighbor

Kflowers

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I suspect that management puts everyone who appears to be very nice and kind in the apartment above hers. They know no one can stop her complaining, but with a nice person they can sort of play the game. Look, she's already tricked you into buying a new carpet.

Management probably expects you to move soon - lose your pet deposit and the canceling the lease fee? If management really wanted to help the woman they'd put her on the top floor. If she wouldn't move, they'd ignore her complaints.

Keep looking for another apartment in another complex.
:vibes::vibes::vibes:
 

tarasgirl06

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Yeah I think so too. :/ I took a picture of the note, which I dated--and the picture will have the date, too--before I taped it on her door. Now I've talked to the super, but I'm on the fence about whether I should bring it up to the landlord as well. On the one hand I'd love to not have to deal with her anymore but on the other, it seems insane that I'd have to be the one going through the hassle of moving when clearly she's the one who's being difficult. Bleh.

But thank you everyone for your advice and kind words!! Seriously it's been very helpful. <3
That is so sad and now it does seem as if moving would be the best alternative, even though it's a big hassle. Doesn't sound like this lady is going to meet you halfway or even any part of the way. :sigh: You have to follow your own best intuition on whether or not to tell the landlord, knowing it might make things worse between the two of you but also knowing that it might be helpful for him/her to know, for your "case".
 
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balloonatic27

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I suspect that management puts everyone who appears to be very nice and kind in the apartment above hers. They know no one can stop her complaining, but with a nice person they can sort of play the game. Look, she's already tricked you into buying a new carpet.

Management probably expects you to move soon - lose your pet deposit and the canceling the lease fee? If management really wanted to help the woman they'd put her on the top floor. If she wouldn't move, they'd ignore her complaints.

Keep looking for another apartment in another complex.
:vibes::vibes::vibes:
Ugh yeah I am annoyed that I'm buying a rug or carpet when I know it won't appease her -- I guess it's really just to prove to management that I'm doing my best (suffice it to say I'm not gonna buy anything expensive). I was saying to a friend last night that she and I should just switch apartments and that would solve everything!! Probably not though, because I hear the people above me walking sometimes, so she'd probably hate this apartment, too. I really hope they aren't just expecting for me to be driven out because I reeeeally don't wanna move to a new complex -- I'm here because I somehow found a rent-controlled apartment in Brooklyn that enables me to live alone on a nonprofit salary, which is a bit of a miracle. I've been wondering what the catch was, and I guess she's it.
 

dustydiamond1

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Well, update to everyone, I tried knocking on her door today -- I heard her walk to the door, flip open the viewer to see who it was, and walk away. I tried knocking again and waited several minutes but she continued to ignore me, so I went and wrote a note saying that I'm trying to resolve her issues with my cat but I can't do that if she won't communicate with me--and that it's not an issue of me leaving out toys, which I don't do, but of cats being nocturnal animals, which I can't control. I said I've thought of a possible solution (I'm thinking of the rug idea) but it won't work without information from her (because I need to know where to put it and when to be extra-quiet), so I asked her to please knock on my door when she's ready to compromise. I know she won't, though. :/
:heartshape: You tried. If she doesn't respond I would inform the super and landlord what I tried to do and see what they say...I'd be very tempted to encourage nite zoomies. I am a very nice person until you pl$$ me off. Just like Bugs Bunny I don't start stuff but I sure will finish it...:cloudy:
:goodluck::hangin::grouphug:
 
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balloonatic27

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Hahaha amazing

I was saying yesterday that it's hard to know when I'll run into the super (my friend was saying I should give him a good tip for Christmas, which I didn't know you're supposed to do???)--and then I was joking that I could always just give Crayon catnip at 11pm and wait for him to knock on my door the next morning. Heh.
 

Jem

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At this point I think you may have to commit to getting a rug, only because you said to management you would, but I WOULD NOT cave into doing anything else, or go above and beyond, and spend money, doing anything other than just "being a normal good neighbor who has a life". I highly doubt ANYTHING would appease this crab. I know I shouldn't be so mean, because there could be a very good reason for her being such a :censored: person, but honestly, I kinda feel like, if I were in your shoes I would try to prove a point. Like... "you think that was bad? how about this!!!. You should try taking up tap dancing or something! :redtongue: (and get tap shoes for your cat too!)
 
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balloonatic27

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Hahaaha like that proverb about the guy with the house that's too loud, so he keeps adding animals to it and then takes them back out so that the house seems quiet in comparison. And yeah there probably is some reason why she's like this, but then I guess there's probably a reason why anyone is like anything--I get the impression that she's lived in this building for a very long time, and probably thinks of any new neighbors as interlopers. Anywaaaay but yeah I will get a rug since I said I would, but I'm about to start looking at rugs filtered by price, lowest first!!
 

kittyluv387

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Ugh I feel for you. I'm having the opposite problem. We were living peacefully until a horrible family moved upstairs a few months ago. We tried talking to them twice and when that didn't work we went to management. But they simply have no regard for others. Their kids will be stampeding like baby elephants for hours on end. Even past midnight. And start assembling a bookcase at 6 am or something. Absolutely horrible people. Luckily for us our lease is up so we're moving in 2 weeks. It sucks having to move after just 1 year but at least we can try to get away from it. We're moving into a luxury apartment with concrete and steel in between the units. I'm hoping the families with multiple kids will stay away since the rent costs as much as a house. But really its just so typical to have inconsiderate neighbors and sometimes if it's so bad you have to move.
 
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balloonatic27

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Oh good grief yes, I've had the stampeding-kids-overhead experience--it really does beggar belief when some people don't realize what makes a lot of noise and what doesn't. The building I'm in is very quiet overall, which I remarked to another (nice) neighbor, and she said it's because all the apartments are studios so there aren't kids. Apartment living can be such a gamble, because oftentimes you never know what it will actually be like until you've already signed the lease and moved in! But congrats on the new apartment--it sounds very worth it, even though moving after a year is a drag--concrete and steel sounds pretty incredible right now.
 

m3rma1d

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Make her some more brownies, but put some wheed in 'em this time. She'll have a good sound sleep, and maybe even lighten up a little bit.





Obviously don't really do that, but it's fun to fantasize. :)
 

Wile

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Hahaha amazing

I was saying yesterday that it's hard to know when I'll run into the super (my friend was saying I should give him a good tip for Christmas, which I didn't know you're supposed to do???)--and then I was joking that I could always just give Crayon catnip at 11pm and wait for him to knock on my door the next morning. Heh.
It probably is just part of your super's job to knock on your door for appearance's sake. If all he has requested is that you don't leave toys out at night then let him know that you don't, and have gone above and beyond and taken the extra step of buying a few rugs.

If I were you I would take steps to try and remove myself from this situation. I would let the super know that the noise level this woman is complaining about really is just a normal sound level, and that this woman has refused to speak to you to resolve the issue. If the super comes to you again with complaints say you have done enough, you find her complaints exaggerated, the situation unreasonable, and would prefer if he deals with addressing things from her end rather than yours moving forward. Throw the ball back in her court. Then the super can do his job and measure sound levels and figure out sound proofing from her end.

:argh:It is really not fair of your super to be constantly relaying complaints without really taking action given this woman's got a history of reporting her neighbours. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.
 
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balloonatic27

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It probably is just part of your super's job to knock on your door for appearance's sake. If all he has requested is that you don't leave toys out at night then let him know that you don't, and have gone above and beyond and taken the extra step of buying a few rugs.

If I were you I would take steps to try and remove myself from this situation. I would let the super know that the noise level this woman is complaining about really is just a normal sound level, and that this woman has refused to speak to you to resolve the issue. If the super comes to you again with complaints say you have done enough, you find her complaints exaggerated, the situation unreasonable, and would prefer if he deals with addressing things from her end rather than yours moving forward. Throw the ball back in her court. Then the super can do his job and measure sound levels and figure out sound proofing from her end.

:argh:It is really not fair of your super to be constantly relaying complaints without really taking action given this woman's got a history of reporting her neighbours. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.
Thank you!! Yeah I agree with all your points. I'll get the rug so that I have it to show the super if he comes back, and beyond that I feel like it's not on me. I agreed when I signed the lease to take "all reasonable steps" to address any complaints about my pet and I'm definitely doing that, and otherwise I feel like my neighbor doesn't really have a leg to stand on. I think I probably will also still ask the landlord to let me know if another apartment opens up in this building.
 

losna

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I also wonder if you're sure it's YOU that is making the noises she's responding to. We ended up moving because of this, but we once had a downstairs neighbor who was constantly complaining about our noise. We laid down sound proof padding and everything.

We asked our landlord to require this guy to write down the specific times our noise was bothering him, and it turned out WE WEREN'T EVEN HOME during most of the times he was listing!!!

Not that it stopped this guy from making our lives miserable, so we eventually just left the complex.
 

Kflowers

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Tipping is for Christmas, you know, not every day or week or anything. In Manhattan it's, well, it's good to be a doorman.
 
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balloonatic27

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I also wonder if you're sure it's YOU that is making the noises she's responding to. We ended up moving because of this, but we once had a downstairs neighbor who was constantly complaining about our noise. We laid down sound proof padding and everything.

We asked our landlord to require this guy to write down the specific times our noise was bothering him, and it turned out WE WEREN'T EVEN HOME during most of the times he was listing!!!

Not that it stopped this guy from making our lives miserable, so we eventually just left the complex.
Omg I hadn't even thought of that -- yeah I do have to wonder, if she didn't know I have a cat, if she would even be hearing these noises. And I have definitely misidentified noises before, thinking that noises were coming from the people below me only to realize later that it's actually the apartment next to me. Ugh. I just feel like some people are really unhappy with apartment living, and I get that you maybe can't afford another solution, but it's still extreme to just drive people out when they're being reasonable.
 

tarasgirl06

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Not to be inimical or anything, but the comments that border on mean here are showing me that a lot of people, even nice people on TCS, simply do not understand or care to understand that for those of us who are noise sensitive, it causes us pain and suffering. Pure and simple. We're not all sick, old, miserable or any other negative thing. We simply are NOISE SENSITIVE. Try to be a little more compassionate and understanding, please.
And yeah, B balloonatic27 , it does sound like another unit in the same building might solve your problem.
 

Kflowers

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But tarasgirl106, wouldn't you want to work with the woman who was trying to work with you, to make you more comfortable? That's the thing that makes the situation difficult.

My own opinion is that the landlord knows the problem and doesn't want to solve it because he makes money on shifting people in and out of the apartment above the complaining lady. He clearly doesn't care about either ballonatic27 or the lady. If he did, he'd have arranged for the lady to move to the top floor, unless there is no elevator and she can't handle the stairs.
 
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