Complaints From Downstairs Neighbor

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balloonatic27

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This whole post makes sense (especially the "who wants flies" thing :flail:) Cracked me up. :crazy:
With that out of the road, even to a noise sensitive person (like myself), a cat running around isn't like you have 200 people and a mosh pit going to a blasting stereo at 3:00 in the morning. It might annoy her, but she needs to understand that living in a building with other people and other living things is going to create noise.
I think talking to her and trying to be nice is a good idea; all 3 parties (the poster, the tenant downstairs, and the super) will know effort has been made. She may still complain but you'll know you've done all you can do to make things nice for her. You might even get bold and ask her "what do you think I could do to make things quieter for you"? She might have a response you don't like, but at least (again) you'll know you've done everything you can to be nice.
As other said, some people just like to complain and are mad at life for some reason, even if the noise doesn't bother her, she might just like complaining.
I wake up to noises about 5 times a night but I just doze off and tune it out. White noise machines help, a box fan or whatever.
If that doesn't work, if it's at all possible or could possibly even be done, I would ask the super about moving apartments whenever something becomes available, no rush, but you want to keep the peace.
You sound like a good neighbor to me. If it makes you feel better, if I woke up to the sound of your cats hooves thundering over my head I'd probably just laugh because they get so dramatic in the middle of the night sometimes. :thumbsup:
Thank you!! Yeah I was wondering if I should ask her what a solution is but I feel like she might be really unreasonable--I mean if she's threatening to call the landlord rather than contact me, I imagine her ideal outcome would be that either my cat has to leave or I do. I'm tempted to tell her she should just talk to me directly next time, rather than continuing to go through the super, but that could be opening a dangerous door.

And haha yes I also find it so funny when they just suddenly lose their minds for no obvious reason! It always makes me think of this:

Wilfred, please rouse me at 3:00 AM I wish to run around the house all batshit insane
 

tarasgirl06

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Haha all good points!! I think I will talk to my neighbor tomorrow, and tell her that I'm willing to put down a rug or two if she'll tell me where they should go (no idea where her bed is and I can't carpet my whole apartment for her), and what hours she needs it to be the most quiet. I have talked to her once before because she banged on the ceiling while I was assembling a bookcase (during the day), and then she also called the super and complained, even though I stopped everything and just left the bookcase in pieces till the next day, when I managed to put it together without a hammer. So I kind of tried the honey tactic heh -- made her brownies, knocked on her door to introduce myself and apologize, and say that I know it's noisy when someone moves in, and she seemed placated. But I guess she wasn't, since she's gone on complaining behind my back.

But I definitely do understand the frustration of having people above or next to you -- I'm a light sleeper as well, and in my old apartment there was a family with five kids on the floor above us, running around and bouncing basketballs around the clock, but no one could complain because it was the landlord's family. Not ideal.

Anyway though, I think you're right that I should try to be nice to her, even though the real issue seems to be that she just hates living in a pet-friendly building. I'd be happy to buy her a white noise machine or something but I somehow feel like she won't like that suggestion.
If she's truly a mean person she won't. You're right. But if she's just a very sensitive person, she might. I know I've been in situations where I wanted to annihilate people because of how miserable their noise made me feel. And while I do have my faults, I don't consider myself just a hateful person. I just feel terrible when I have to deal with other people's noise. I've really improved a lot, but I empathize so much with people who are just truly noise sensitive and have to live in multi-unit housing. Been there, done that, survived, but oh, it is painful when it happens. And so the brownies might have been very much appreciated, but that was then, and this is now, and she may really be suffering, whether or not other people would be, or understand it. So yes, if you can keep trying, it would sure be better than not.
 

dustydiamond1

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Haha all good points!! I think I will talk to my neighbor tomorrow, and tell her that I'm willing to put down a rug or two if she'll tell me where they should go (no idea where her bed is and I can't carpet my whole apartment for her), and what hours she needs it to be the most quiet. I have talked to her once before because she banged on the ceiling while I was assembling a bookcase (during the day), and then she also called the super and complained, even though I stopped everything and just left the bookcase in pieces till the next day, when I managed to put it together without a hammer. So I kind of tried the honey tactic heh -- made her brownies, knocked on her door to introduce myself and apologize, and say that I know it's noisy when someone moves in, and she seemed placated. But I guess she wasn't, since she's gone on complaining behind my back.

But I definitely do understand the frustration of having people above or next to you -- I'm a light sleeper as well, and in my old apartment there was a family with five kids on the floor above us, running around and bouncing basketballs around the clock, but no one could complain because it was the landlord's family. Not ideal.

Anyway though, I think you're right that I should try to be nice to her, even though the real issue seems to be that she just hates living in a pet-friendly building. I'd be happy to buy her a white noise machine or something but I somehow feel like she won't like that suggestion.
:gaah:I once lived in the apartment below an uncarpeted hardwood floored place where the @sswhole wore cowboy boots constantly.:runaround:Tried to nicely speak to him about it but he just stood there with a bemused look on his face.:doh2: :doh:
 

tarasgirl06

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Thank you!! Yeah I was wondering if I should ask her what a solution is but I feel like she might be really unreasonable--I mean if she's threatening to call the landlord rather than contact me, I imagine her ideal outcome would be that either my cat has to leave or I do. I'm tempted to tell her she should just talk to me directly next time, rather than continuing to go through the super, but that could be opening a dangerous door.

And haha yes I also find it so funny when they just suddenly lose their minds for no obvious reason! It always makes me think of this:

Wilfred, please rouse me at 3:00 AM I wish to run around the house all batshit insane
:lolup::flail::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup:
 

1 bruce 1

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Thank you!! Yeah I was wondering if I should ask her what a solution is but I feel like she might be really unreasonable--I mean if she's threatening to call the landlord rather than contact me, I imagine her ideal outcome would be that either my cat has to leave or I do. I'm tempted to tell her she should just talk to me directly next time, rather than continuing to go through the super, but that could be opening a dangerous door.

And haha yes I also find it so funny when they just suddenly lose their minds for no obvious reason! It always makes me think of this:

Wilfred, please rouse me at 3:00 AM I wish to run around the house all batshit insane
:flail::flail::flail:
Perfect photo and perfect quotes on that link!
I think the adult thing of her would be to talk to you directly. If I have a problem with a neighbor, I will tell them, not write a snitty little letter to the newspaper editor about it.
Depending on how dangerous that door is, it might be something to at least keep in the back of your mind for consideration.
Do you know anything about this lady's life or family, by chance?
 

AbbyBail

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Go buy her some earplugs! When you live in an apartment, you need to be aware that there are all sorts of people living in the same building. Some are loud with or without the help of animals and some quiet ones you'd think the apt. was vacant. Don't mean sound blunt about it. Just that my experience was with others coming and going all hours of the night, door slamming and very loud music. I would rather have thunder paws running about than all that. I live in a duplex.
 

BestCatMom

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Your landlord can’t make you get rid of the cat if he knew that there was a problem. He might try and help you move to a new location within the building, or try and find a solution for your neighbor.

I wish the best of luck for you, and your cat.
 

Maria Bayote

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Hi everyone,

I was wondering if anyone has had experience and advice on a situation like this: I've lived in a 2nd floor apartment for a few months now, and right when I moved in, I was warned by the super that the woman below me is really cranky and noise-sensitive. He said she complained constantly about the previous tenant's cat running around at night, so I should make sure not to leave toys out for my cat at night. I've been very careful to follow his advice, and only play with my cat on the couch or my bed--but even without toys, sometimes she still runs around briefly at night, because she's, you know, a cat.

So the super came up to my apartment today and told me that the neighbor has been complaining nonstop about my cat (guess I shouldn't have bothered making her brownies and apologizing in person when she complained about the sound of me assembling a bookcase). He says she doesn't care what my cat does during the day but at night she can't sleep, and she's threatening to call the landlord. (The landlord knows I have a cat but he can probably pressure me to "get rid of her," which obviously I won't do--I'd just ask my parents to take her in while I looked for a new place, but moving again would be a nightmare.)

Has anyone had a similar experience, and/or any advice on what to do? I've been reading that it helps to feed your cat and play with them right before bed, so I can try that, but I feel like a lot of tips like that don't necessarily work, and I'm nervous that she'll still start running around after I've fallen asleep, if I do; I already have a lot of trouble sleeping so anxiety about this is about to make everything worse. My dad says I should get a thick rug, so maybe I'll do that, but really I'd have to get several to cover the whole floor because I don't know where my neighbor's bed is, or if she'll complain about noise no matter where it is--and I hate having rugs or carpet, so I guess it'd ideally be something I could put down at night and pick up in the morning.

Any advice would be much-appreciated; I'm really worried and upset. :(
Your dad is right. Get a thicker carpet. And try as much as you can to exhaust her before bedtime (by playing with her or giving her all these battery-operated toys) so she won't have much energy to run around at night. And ensure she has her full dinner also so she won't be waking up soon on a hungry stomach :)

I have quite a similar situation, only that I live in the ground floor of a building flat. I have two rescued cats of my own, but they somehow are the quiet felines. The issue is with the street cat I have been feeding which the neighbors want me to stop, simply because she likes to rub herself against anyone passing by (sweet cat!). What I did is I now feed her from my kitchen window, not from my main door so she wouldn't have to "bugger" anyone else.

Now I should be the one "complaining" about the noisy kids upstairs, running and screaming through the hallways and corridors. But I won't do that. Cats are cats. And kids are kids.
 

JamesCalifornia

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I was warned by the super that the woman below me is really cranky and noise-sensitive. He said she complained constantly about the previous tenant's cat
~ Well ... you made a mistake in the first place. Anyway I wonder if anyone ever complains about her ?
Maybe it's time they did !!

Go buy her some earplugs!
~ Love this suggestion :yess: But make sure you gift wrap it ...
If your landlord should contact you simply reply: " Oh - is this about that nuisance tenant you placed me next to? You'll have to contact my attorney."
Seriously , this woman sounds selfish and depressed. Not good ...
 

artiemom

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I can appreciate your predicament. My upstairs neighbors had been horrible when they first moved in.. from a drum set, to a teenage boy, with his friends, wearing construction boots watching all the sports games.. and the stereo..

I am a very light sleeper, also.

I complained, and complained.. got me no where. Finally I spoke with the son, and his friends directly.. nicely..

Things got a bit better, but I resorted to ear plugs and an air purifier which I use as a sound machine--white noise..

That could be an option for your neighbor..

If your landlord or super mentions it to you again; I would suggest a sleep sound machine for your neighbor, and volunteer to put carpeting down in you apartment.

This way, you come across as being willing to compromise, and not unbending. You are offering suggestions for both of you..

You cannot stop cats from being cats.. You can teach respect to kids, when the run and scream down the corridor..

Cats are cats.. nothing you can do to stop that.. Cats get the zoomies, and they play.. so what.. imagine how much noise there would be if a toddler or 2 lived above this neighbor??

Yes, I can hear the cat, upstairs, jump and sometimes play.. but, cats are cats...

You landlord knew you had a cat. They also knew there were issues with the downstairs neighbor, from the last tenant who had a cat.. seems to me, that the problem is your downstairs neighbor and not you.

If the above suggestions do not work, then as to be moved to another apartment..to your liking, with the same rent. Check it out first, before you agree.. and ask the management to help you move. It is not your fault you have to move..

I would not immediately jump into the moving.. I would try the rugs, and offer to take this woman shopping for a sound machine.. do NOT offer to pay for it.. perhaps management will pay for it.. it is HER problem, and not yours.. show that you are going more than halfway..
and document this, in writing.. send a note to both your super and your landlord.
Be nice, but insist you are trying to be a good neighbor.. and are trying options to get along.. do not take the blame.

In other words, be strong, but not provide options.....
 
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balloonatic27

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If she's truly a mean person she won't. You're right. But if she's just a very sensitive person, she might. I know I've been in situations where I wanted to annihilate people because of how miserable their noise made me feel. And while I do have my faults, I don't consider myself just a hateful person. I just feel terrible when I have to deal with other people's noise. I've really improved a lot, but I empathize so much with people who are just truly noise sensitive and have to live in multi-unit housing. Been there, done that, survived, but oh, it is painful when it happens. And so the brownies might have been very much appreciated, but that was then, and this is now, and she may really be suffering, whether or not other people would be, or understand it. So yes, if you can keep trying, it would sure be better than not.
Well, update to everyone, I tried knocking on her door today -- I heard her walk to the door, flip open the viewer to see who it was, and walk away. I tried knocking again and waited several minutes but she continued to ignore me, so I went and wrote a note saying that I'm trying to resolve her issues with my cat but I can't do that if she won't communicate with me--and that it's not an issue of me leaving out toys, which I don't do, but of cats being nocturnal animals, which I can't control. I said I've thought of a possible solution (I'm thinking of the rug idea) but it won't work without information from her (because I need to know where to put it and when to be extra-quiet), so I asked her to please knock on my door when she's ready to compromise. I know she won't, though. :/
 

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Well, update to everyone, I tried knocking on her door today -- I heard her walk to the door, flip open the viewer to see who it was, and walk away. I tried knocking again and waited several minutes but she continued to ignore me, so I went and wrote a note saying that I'm trying to resolve her issues with my cat but I can't do that if she won't communicate with me--and that it's not an issue of me leaving out toys, which I don't do, but of cats being nocturnal animals, which I can't control. I said I've thought of a possible solution (I'm thinking of the rug idea) but it won't work without information from her (because I need to know where to put it and when to be extra-quiet), so I asked her to please knock on my door when she's ready to compromise. I know she won't, though. :/
Well, I'll continue to think the best for you.
 

tarasgirl06

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Keep a copy of the note and the day, and what transpired. I have a feeling management will end up getting involved. She sounds like a lonely, disgruntled old woman..very unhappy in life..
Good idea, artiemom artiemom . I agree, and it's so sad, because here she has an offer of help and even possibly friendship on some level, as neighbors.
 

Jem

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I've been following your thread, but did not have much else to offer over what others have said. But I will encourage you to contact management and tell them what you did. They should know that you are trying to get to a resolution, but that she is not cooperating. Although I have a feeling they must know by now that YOU (and your cat) are NOT the problem.
Good luck with everything!
 
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balloonatic27

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Well, update to everyone, I tried knocking on her door today -- I heard her walk to the door, flip open the viewer to see who it was, and walk away. I tried knocking again and waited several minutes but she continued to ignore me, so I went and wrote a note saying that I'm trying to resolve her issues with my cat but I can't do that if she won't communicate with me--and that it's not an issue of me leaving out toys, which I don't do, but of cats being nocturnal animals, which I can't control. I said I've thought of a possible solution (I'm thinking of the rug idea) but it won't work without information from her (because I need to know where to put it and when to be extra-quiet), so I asked her to please knock on my door when she's ready to compromise. I know she won't, though. :/
Oh my gosh, so I called the super to tell him that I'm trying to communicate with her but she won't come to the door, so if she complains again, could he please ask her to talk to me directly -- and he said SHE ALREADY CALLED AND COMPLAINED ABOUT ME KNOCKING ON HER DOOR, and she's just gonna refuse to talk to me. So I told him my idea about the rug and he said it's worth a shot, and he was able to tell me roughly where her bed is/where I should put it. I asked when she's trying to sleep and he said he doesn't know when she goes to bed but it must be early bc she gets up at 5am. So I said I'll use that info and do my best and he said thank you, and apologized for the inconvenience. I feel like that's all I can do.
 
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balloonatic27

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I've been following your thread, but did not have much else to offer over what others have said. But I will encourage you to contact management and tell them what you did. They should know that you are trying to get to a resolution, but that she is not cooperating. Although I have a feeling they must know by now that YOU (and your cat) are NOT the problem.
Good luck with everything!
Thank you!! I hope they know that, too.
 
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balloonatic27

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Keep a copy of the note and the day, and what transpired. I have a feeling management will end up getting involved. She sounds like a lonely, disgruntled old woman..very unhappy in life..
Yeah I think so too. :/ I took a picture of the note, which I dated--and the picture will have the date, too--before I taped it on her door. Now I've talked to the super, but I'm on the fence about whether I should bring it up to the landlord as well. On the one hand I'd love to not have to deal with her anymore but on the other, it seems insane that I'd have to be the one going through the hassle of moving when clearly she's the one who's being difficult. Bleh.

But thank you everyone for your advice and kind words!! Seriously it's been very helpful. <3
 
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