Clingy/anxious behaviour while sleeping next to me... cause for concern?

[koolimy]

Hi, I am a new cat caretaker who recently started taking care of an injured stray cat. I slept with him yesterday because the weather outside was very cold, and his clingy/anxious behavior worried me a little. Is this behavior natural? If not, what can I do to help him behave better?

Background Info:
First, I have never owned or taken care of any pets my entire life. I became friends with a stray cat in my apartment complex, and fed him some food for a while. I stopped after receiving a notice from the apartment leasing office asking me not to feed the stray cats.

I stopped quite a long time ago, and recently I traveled out of town for Thanksgiving, so I didn't see the cat for a while. 3 days ago, I was throwing my trash away and found him with an injured front paw. I decided to take him in to feed him and give him some warmth. I also called a mobile vet to treat his injury. She came 2 days ago and gave him a shot of antibiotics and some treatment for ear-mites and other parasites.

Being a stray, he freaks out whenever he is in an apartment with the apartment door closed. Therefore, I have been keeping the apartment door open a bit whenever I take him in to feed him and give shelter.

Yesterday's events:
Yesterday, I brought him in again, because it was a very cold night. After dinner, he cuddled up next to me and slept. Of course, I had to get up and do things like brush my teeth, go to the bathroom, turn off the lights, etc. Whenever I got up, he seemed really anxious and stressed out, as his meows sounded very strained.

To alleviate his fears, I tried to sleep next to him. However, I messed up by not turning on the apartment heater (only using an electrical space heater), and it was very cold and uncomfortable. He did not like it when I woke him up because of me turning over in my sleep, and was quite vocal with his displeasure. This is probably his natural, bossy personality, right? The day before, he was laying his head on my leg, and he tried to bite my leg when I got up to do something. He seems to generally display bossiness/anxiety/displeasure whenever he cuddles up next to me and I have to get away and do something. Is this bad behavior? If it is, do you have any tips on what I can do so as to not reinforce bad behavior?

He's generally very confident and friendly to anybody, so his anxiousness/clingy behavior was quite new to me.

The most puzzling thing was the anxiousness he showed whenever I tried to tuck my hands into my blanket to warm them up from the freezing cold. Does anybody know why he would exhibit such behavior? He calmed down very shortly after I took my hands out, much to my dismay hahaha.

I don't know if I will adopt him long term, due to my unpredictable schedule, travel needs, and potential life changes. I just want to make sure he doesn't pick up bad habits while I take care of him as he heals his injury.

Sorry for the long and rambling post. I have no experience with any types of pets, so I would appreciate any tips or advice.
Thank you.

 

[Kieka]

Sounds like he is just a bossy one. I'd ignore the yelling when he does it to keep from encouraging it. If your hands are cold, pull them under and if he doesnt like it ignore him. After a few times he will learn that petting or hands are only there when its mutually beneficial and not when he smacks the hands. When my boy is feeling especially clingy he will slap me if I try to move or hold onto a limb. I tolerate it as long as claws aren't used. If he uses claws I say ouch and pull away then hid whatever body part under blankets so he cant repeat it. If there is no claws and it isnt uncomfortable, I will hold still. It's a balance and finding what works. Dont let him boss you too much or he will always but where it works compromise.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Hi! It is also possible that he is behaving that way due to not feeling well. Sometimes, feeling bad will make them be more clingy and less tolerant about what is happening when they think they might be losing that security they are feeling by being near 'their person". I'd wait a while and see if some of that behavior lessens as he heals more and feels better.

Are you able to keep him inside all the time now? That could also be part of his issue - any time you move about, he associates it with the possibility of being put back outside. I know you said he gets nervous with the door closed, but I assume you had the door closed last night - and, from what you described, his biggest concern was you not being right there with him.

 

[koolimy]

Hi! It is also possible that he is behaving that way due to not feeling well. Sometimes, feeling bad will make them be more clingy and less tolerant about what is happening when they think they might be losing that security they are feeling by being near 'their person". I'd wait a while and see if some of that behavior lessens as he heals more and feels better.

Are you able to keep him inside all the time now? That could also be part of his issue - any time you move about, he associates it with the possibility of being put back outside. I know you said he gets nervous with the door closed, but I assume you had the door closed last night - and, from what you described, his biggest concern was you not being right there with him.

Thanks for your reply! I was wondering that also, maybe it's due to him not feeling well.
I can't keep him inside at all times. Yesterday we slept with the door open, hence the freezing cold. He came in around 9, went to sleep around 11, woke up around 1 and ventured outside, and came back again and left at dawn. He leaves on his own volition, and I have to coax him to come in. It's just that while he was in my apartment, he became really clingy.

Sounds like he is just a bossy one. I'd ignore the yelling when he does it to keep from encouraging it. If your hands are cold, pull them under and if he doesnt like it ignore him. After a few times he will learn that petting or hands are only there when its mutually beneficial and not when he smacks the hands. When my boy is feeling especially clingy he will slap me if I try to move or hold onto a limb. I tolerate it as long as claws aren't used. If he uses claws I say ouch and pull away then hid whatever body part under blankets so he cant repeat it. If there is no claws and it isnt uncomfortable, I will hold still. It's a balance and finding what works. Dont let him boss you too much or he will always but where it works compromise.

Thanks for your reply! I talked w/ my co-worker about it and she also told me that I should not let him boss me around too much from the beginning.

The first night I took him in (2 nights ago), I actually tried to do my own thing. I fed him and tried to play with him a little (he wasn't very interested in any toys I had), and after playing/showing affection to him I let him rest inside my apartment while I surfed the internet and did my things. I also slept in my own bedroom while he was sleeping in the living room. He laid his head on my lap for a brief moment when I was showing affection to him, but as I mentioned I got up to do something and he attempted to bite me. Outside of that, there was not much drama. He just laid around watching the door.

The second night (yesterday night) when I tried to coax him to come in, he was quite aloof from me and did not vocalize much at all (He's usually very talkative). I tried extending my hand for a bunt, but he would ignore my hand. It was only after waiting for him for quite a while, following him as he did his thing, and extending my hand out for a long time did he warm up and come in. It's so strange because he was so aloof outside, but became clingy inside.

 

[Kieka]

It's so strange because he was so aloof outside, but became clingy inside.

My girl does that. It's almost like each area has it's own rules. She was feral and for the longest time I could not even pet her when she was outside but if we went inside it was suddenly safe. Same with being cuddly inside but distant outside. Inside, Rocket meows and demands pets. Outside, Rocket is silent and distant.

 

[RangersMom]

The kitty is not feeling well, and is used to being outside in the 'wild' so it makes sense he would be jumpy and anxious.
I adopted a stray cat 3 years ago, and she still sometimes acts like a loon inside when she wants back out. Strays are used to jumping at every new sound and movement, and since hes not used to you sounds and movements, esp when sleeping, its probably making him a bit anxious. I wouldnt worry, just let him do his own thing while he heals.

 

[koolimy]

Thanks for all your replies! I'll just try to feed and give him affection for the time being. Hopefully as he heals he'll get more confident and independent.