Cat intro help!!

[Calr0007]

I see,,with Marley not really handleable I'd NOT just open the gate up,especially in a confined space....

It is best to continue on as you are - give them snacks facing one another and make it a big deal with high praise to associate being close gets " rewards"!!!!

They have been really good today. Breakfast and playtime at the screen. During playtime when Nelly would get super close to the screen they would both get treats. They would lock eyes sometimes but I could break it with toys, when they did lock, there was no aggression. Marley is barely reacting to her and walking away from the screen even if I am in the room with her. This afternoon, he did go upstairs and cried and pawed at the screen (she was in the bed), I don’t think he could see her. She didn’t come to the screen so he left.

Not saying today but when I do let them meet, anyone think it would be a bad idea to put her in a carrier and bring her downstairs, let him smell and make sure she seems comfortable. Then let her out down there? Since my hallway is so narrow and that’s the only way out from her room. Maybe bring her down in carrier for 10 minutes every few hours and bring her back to her room.

 

[Kwik]

You can do an intro with her in the carrier and leave him out a few times--- she likes the carrier?

 

[FeebysOwner]

anyone think it would be a bad idea to put her in a carrier and bring her downstairs, let him smell and make sure she seems comfortable. Then let her out down there? Since my hallway is so narrow and that’s the only way out from her room. Maybe bring her down in carrier for 10 minutes every few hours and bring her back to her room.

Personally, I'd say no. I do not believe in placing a cat confined to a carrier or pen with another 'loose' cat, especially if they aren't best of buddies. It is too intimidating for the one that is confined.

I'd wait until she decides to make her own way downstairs (while Marley is in a closed door room) and let her get comfortable with the area without him first.

 

[Kwik]

Personally, I'd say no. I do not believe in placing a cat confined to a carrier or pen with another 'loose' cat, especially if they aren't best of buddies. It is too intimidating for the one that is confined.

I'd wait until she decides to make her own way downstairs (while Marley is in a closed door room) and let her get comfortable with the area without him first.

Yes- I didnt mean bring the carrier downstairs- I don't recommend bringing cats to unfamiliar places in the home.... I meant let the girl visit the room where he is already comfy ( the girl is the resident?) Or am I confused again

I keep losing track of who is who

 

[FeebysOwner]

I meant let the girl visit the room where he is already comfy ( the girl is the resident?)

Marley (male) is the resident cat, Nelly (female) is the 'newcomer'. I think Marley has actually already been in Nelly's safe room, but not sure if he has been there when she is in it.

 

[Calr0007]

Marley (male) is the resident cat, Nelly (female) is the 'newcomer'. I think Marley has actually already been in Nelly's safe room, but not sure if he has been there when she is in it.

Marley (RC) has been in her room many times with her in the bathroom. Nelly (NC) has been all over the house several times over the last 2 days while Marley is locked in my room. She is very comfortable outside of her room and will go downstairs no problem.

I fear if I am downstairs with Marley, open her door, and she runs downstairs it will completely catch him off guard. If I open the screen he will no doubt go in her room. Which won’t that make her feel unsafe? There isn’t really a good way to get them nose to nose with ample space unless I do it downstairs.

 

[FeebysOwner]

So, you don't want to try it in the area just outside of her room because of space? I would think if you have a piece of cardboard to place between them should something happen, like an attack, that would suffice. Otherwise, picking up Marley or Nelly if you see something you don't like would also probably work.

Is Nelly coming right up to the netting now when Marley is on the other side? If she is still shying away, you might not try to jump just yet to a 'no barrier' exposure. Have you tried to use just the baby gate without the netting so they can actually touch each other through the gate? If you are worried about one of them jumping the gate, then get a second gate to create a double tier.

 

[Kwik]

Marley (RC) has been in her room many times with her in the bathroom. Nelly (NC) has been all over the house several times over the last 2 days while Marley is locked in my room. She is very comfortable outside of her room and will go downstairs no problem.

I fear if I am downstairs with Marley, open her door, and she runs downstairs it will completely catch him off guard. If I open the screen he will no doubt go in her room. Which won’t that make her feel unsafe? There isn’t really a good way to get them nose to nose with ample space unless I do it downstairs.

Well,that's what I mean with using the carrier- since you've done scent swapping,room swapping and you are already past scent and into "sight" and if it is like you say and there's no aggression and they aren't so interested in each other except when eating then you can put one in the carrier ( preferably your resident Marley) with Nelly loose..... Nelly is the one you can handle? Or no?

If you cannot easily handle both cats and they are not handleable then you have to go very slow because you'll be unable control them if it gets heated -if you are sure you can redirect their attention if necessary then that's another story

I still say you should be patient,they'll be ' nose to nose' for the rest of their lives,so what's the hurry..... Keep things as you're doing,when they are very used to each other through the mesh and interested( wanting to get closer) you'll know it.... And if they show no interest at all that's alright too,you'll know if they'll want to explore casually and calmly or try to rush the gate when you go in and out

Study them awhile and give them time to study each other.... That's my advice,slow and easy

 

[Kwik]

So, you don't want to try it in the area just outside of her room because of space? I would think if you have a piece of cardboard to place between them should something happen, like an attack, that would suffice. Otherwise, picking up Marley or Nelly if you see something you don't like would also probably work.

Is Nelly coming right up to the netting now when Marley is on the other side? If she is still shying away, you might not try to jump just yet to a 'no barrier' exposure. Have you tried to use just the baby gate without the netting so they can actually touch each other through the gate? If you are worried about one of them jumping the gate, then get a second gate to create a double tier.

Agreed.... Too soon imo

 

[Calr0007]

So, you don't want to try it in the area just outside of her room because of space? I would think if you have a piece of cardboard to place between them should something happen, like an attack, that would suffice. Otherwise, picking up Marley or Nelly if you see something you don't like would also probably work.

Is Nelly coming right up to the netting now when Marley is on the other side? If she is still shying away, you might not try to jump just yet to a 'no barrier' exposure. Have you tried to use just the baby gate without the netting so they can actually touch each other through the gate? If you are worried about one of them jumping the gate, then get a second gate to create a double tier.

Yes because of space. Narrow hallway. I think should something happen Nelly would run back to her room and Marley would chase her but that’s just a guess. Five minutes ago I was sitting on Marley side and called her to me, she came right up to the screen. This was the first time that happened, I gave them both treats.

I am good with continuing this stage for a while but I am thinking about next steps. Ohhhh I tried the baby gate only the first week and that was a disaster, she scaled my back to jump it, landed right in front of him, scared the crap out of him and he attacked her and then turned on me. Neither of us were hurt but it was the scariest thing that has ever happened to me with an animal. I guess I can go get another baby gate and try that as my next step. I can tell she is tired of being in here especially since she has seen the rest of the house. I feel awful for keeping her in here for so long.

 

[Calr0007]

Well,that's what I mean with using the carrier- since you've done scent swapping,room swapping and you are already past scent and into "sight" and if it is like you say and there's no aggression and they aren't so interested in each other except when eating then you can put one in the carrier ( preferably your resident Marley) with Nelly loose..... Nelly is the one you can handle? Or no?

If you cannot easily handle both cats and they are not handleable then you have to go very slow because you'll be unable control them if it gets heated -if you are sure you can redirect their attention if necessary then that's another story

I still say you should be patient,they'll be ' nose to nose' for the rest of their lives,so what's the hurry..... Keep things as you're doing,when they are very used to each other through the mesh and interested( wanting to get closer) you'll know it.... And if they show no interest at all that's alright too,you'll know if they'll want to explore casually and calmly or try to rush the gate when you go in and out

Study them awhile and give them time to study each other.... That's my advice,slow and easy

I am good with keeping this stage going for a while. The slow and steady has been working but I am thinking of next steps. Right now they are both super calm. Nelly is getting more and more curious with him so I know I am going in the right direction. When it’s time is what I guess what I am worried about screwing it up and starting over.

 

[Kwik]

I am good with keeping this stage going for a while. The slow and steady has been working but I am thinking of next steps. Right now they are both super calm. Nelly is getting more and more curious with him so I know I am going in the right direction. When it’s time is what I guess what I am worried about screwing it up and starting over.

You won't screw anything up- just stay in " the now'...... They will take you to the next phase,let it be and let them get curious and want companionship....

You know most things we worry about dont usually go that way anyway.... You don't have to think ahead because you're doing fine right where you're at,don't overthink it

Oh,I love FeebysOwner suggestion of removing the mesh,I personally don't use mesh,I use welded wire kennel panels so they can stick their paws through and touch

So if your gate has rungs or bars that's exactly what Id fo

 

[FeebysOwner]

When it’s time is what I guess what I am worried about screwing it up and starting over.

If and when something would happen, depending on the severity, it isn't like having to start all over again. Usually, you can just go back to the previous step and let them work through that one again. Which, for you, would mean back on each side of the mesh gate.

 

[Calr0007]

If and when something would happen, depending on the severity, it isn't like having to start all over again. Usually, you can just go back to the previous step and let them work through that one again. Which, for you, would mean back on each side of the mesh gate.

How do you think they are doing??

 

[FeebysOwner]

I see Marley being interested, and Nelly not all that crazy about being so close for any length of time. Neither is really trying to touch the other one through the gate. Maybe they don't recognize that the gate can give them more of an opportunity to do that than the mesh. Or, maybe they aren't at that stage yet to want to try. Keep at it, and see if you notice subtle changes as more time passes.

 

[Calr0007]

I see Marley being interested, and Nelly not all that crazy about being so close for any length of time. Neither is really trying to touch the other one through the gate. Maybe they don't recognize that the gate can give them more of an opportunity to do that than the mesh. Or, maybe they aren't at that stage yet to want to try. Keep at it, and see if you notice subtle changes as more time passes.

Ok! I will keep going! She really wants out of the room but I think she knows it’s through him. She is getting better about approaching the gate but you are correct, she doesn’t stay for long unless there are treats.

This morning I had Marley in my room to let her out and for the first time, she parked herself at my door and started scratching to get in. I know she knows Marley was right there because he cried. I’ll keep going with the gate and maybe in another week or so things will progress further.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Did Nelly bother to venture anywhere else while she was out?

 

[Calr0007]

Did Nelly bother to venture anywhere else while she was out?

She’s runs the whole house, up and down the stairs playing. I have been letting her out for an hour or two while I am with Marley in my room. She seems totally fine out there on her own, I check on her of course. She will come back upstairs every so often to go to her room (I can see on the camera) but then she heads right back out. When Marley starts crying to leave my room I say to Nelly let’s go to your room and she follows me. I shut her in and let him out. Repeat in the morning and evening for the last several days.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Is there any reason that you don't place Marley in Nelly's room when she is out and about? I just wonder if she were on the other side of the gate if she would approach Marley in her room.

 

[Calr0007]

Is there any reason that you don't place Marley in Nelly's room when she is out and about? I just wonder if she were on the other side of the gate if she would approach Marley in her room.

I think I worry about upsetting him but it’s worth a shot. For some reason I think he will feel like I am punishing him but I am sure it’s not that deep he has been in her room many times but not shut in, when I was letting him in her room I would put her in the bathroom. I will try it tonight for just a little bit and see what happens.