Cat Confidence And Introductions - Ideas, Experiences, Confidence Building Exercises.

[FeralHearts]

If you are having some trouble introducing you cats. See if one of them is having a confidence issue. If you do notice this- then its time to work on building it.

How to tell if a cat lacks confidence?

A couple of things are:
Slinking close to the ground, making their bodies very small.
Running away at the slightest noise / movement.
Allow another cat to bully them - or treat them like prey - because - frankly they are acting like prey.
Being a shy wallflower - hiding.
Not jumping, or going up on cat trees.

A couple of ways that can help build confidence:

One way is to play - building confidence though play is important. A confident hunting kitty!
Another way is to convince to try to get the kitty to go higher - getting them higher up helps to build confidence.

Anyone else have ideas, experience with confidence issues? How did you help the kitty become a more confident kitty? What would you recommend?

Do you have issues with a kitty with a lack of confidence? How are you coping?

My experience so far with a cat that has no confidence, and those that do - what a difference:

I have four cats now. 1 very territorial Resident (Charlie) and three ferals, Mia (missing in Action), W.L (White Label) and Braveheart. Each of the feral cats have been brought in over a 6 months period for various issues.

One particular Feral (Mia) is having issue with Charlie (the resident kitty). Over the past few days I've finally been able to start introducing White label and Braveheart to him. FYI Mia was the first to be introduced to him. On Sunday there was a gate jump and an accidental meeting with Braveheart and W.L. - and it went just fine. I was shocked that it did based on his reactions to Mia.

I had been terrified to introduce W.L and Braveheart to him since 1. He's not feeling up to snuff right now and 2. Things have gone so very,very poorly with Mia.

Did I follow how to introduce cats with Mia - yup. Did I do that with Braveheart and W.L - yes and no - I wasn't finished - apparently they were.

Here's what I've witnessed:

Mia is a wallflower, she rarely leaves her safe room - unless there is food involved and then she is the bravest cat in the world. Don't try to get in the way of her and her food. She will find her brave boots!

Mia walks lower, slinks, runs low to the ground. She runs - Charlie chases and back in the safe room she goes. She hides.

W.L is a confident cat. He hits her, she'll and hit him back. She doesn't run from him - even when shes looking a bit nervous about him.

Braveheart is a bit weary and a nervous cat - but she also doesn't run from Charlie. He'll even walk right by her like she's not even there. Braveheart has little to no reaction to him and Charlie reciprocates. (Braveheart was the one I thought most likely to actually be a danger to Charlie so I was extremely cautious.)

The one with zero confidence is Mia - and that's the kitty he has issues with.

For Mia I've been slowing moving her food out of her safe room and then trying to keep her there for some time afterwards. Even by a few minutes of play. Each day I've moved her food dish a foot or two outside her room.

I bought her a cat tree months ago - it took her at least a month to get half way up it. Now she will go up and down at will - though never to the top - we are still working on that - at least a bit of progress.

She's gotten a bit chunky due to her sedentary lifestyle. AKA scared - so more playtime is in order.

Edit to add: Yup another epic long post from me. What - you expected a one liner?

I need to learn how to write shorter posts. In my defense I think writing it - it's short - posting it actually adds 20 pounds! *nods*

 

[Furballsmom]

This is a terrific post - thank you! I hadn't thought about height being helpful in building confidence

 

[FeralHearts]

This is a terrific post - thank you! I hadn't thought about height being helpful in building confidence

Thanks Furballsmom hopefully, it helps someone else having trouble getting their babies to tolerate each other and others will be able to provide ideas on confidence-building skills for the wallflowers of the world like Mia.

 

[OllieBoy99]

Hi! I just found your post. Do you have any recommendations for building confidence? I just got a new cat. He’s able to walk around the house and jump onto the very top of the cat trees and wall furniture without much problems. I don’t really think he’s a wall flower. BUT my residential cat Oliver is a complete bully and will full on attack. The new cat just runs. I swap sites and scents everyday and they can eat next to each other without out a barrier just fine. I play with Oliver till he’s panting for a few seconds and let the new cat in and try to keep Oliver focused on me but it usually ends with Oliver chasing and attacking the new cat. As long as there is a barrier(dog crate or door) both are great. No hissing no anything. But as soon as the barrier is, new cat gets chased and attacked. Any advice?

 

[FeralHearts]

O OllieBoy99 Sadly sounds like they need a much, much slower introduction. It doesn't sound like a confidence issue as much as a territory issue.

My advice would be to dial it back completely to day one, one step at a time. One room each, then swap rooms for a bit etc.

Sadly I'm a failure here on that one: Charlie and White label still have that issue. She runs he chases and attacks. It's a game to him but not to her.

Predator and prey.

Make sense?

PS I know it sucks to start like day one - but it is the best chance.

 

[OllieBoy99]

Thank you! I have then both in Separate rooms now. I only let them together if it’s meal time and once that’s over I guide the aggressor back to his room. So far it’s been good and he acknowledges the new cat but goes back to eating. I’ve been also doing blanket swaps and room swap too.
Before it was definitely a lot of chasing. If haru (new cat) ran across the crate, Oliver (res cat and aggressor) tends to be more reactive. But if he walked, they usually bop noses through the crate and haru keeps going. Sometimes Oliver paws at his fur other times, he just sits and watches.

I guess only time will tell but I will keep it as a slow as they both need it !

 

[FeralHearts]

O OllieBoy99 It the most frustrating and slow process - and I mean wow frustrating.. The slower you can go the better. Play with them together through the gates too. Let the associate each other with good things. As soon as something negative occurs. Stop. and go back to the start.

BTW Mia and Charlie are friends now. She's allowed him to be the dominate one, she comes out of her room and ventures, they sometimes sleep beside each other and she will climb her tree! That took near a year to get that wallflower to do. It took her and Charlie about 8 months of that.

 

[OllieBoy99]

Oh wow! Hopefully one day they will be able to figure it out as well

 

[FeralHearts]

O OllieBoy99 They will but sadly a lot falls on you.

I made a massive mistake with WL and Charlie. I was in the middle of renos and poor guy was forced into 3 cats introducing in a very short period of time. (They were injured ferals so no choice.) I didn't have a place to separate them properly as the wallflower would not leave the only separate room there was. WL, BH and Charlie were separated by a make shift room divider that was made of pull off wall paneling. Not ideal and I did the best I could under the circumstances. Knowing what i know now - I would have found a way to force the separation longer.

If I could have found a way to do it slower - WL and Charlie might be in a better frame with one another.

Mia thankfully and Charlie are a peace with each other. Which I never thought would happen. So have faith! You can do this!