Cat and kitten intro is stalled, any advice?

LalaLois

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Anxious new kitten mom, still trying to navigate!

We currently have had our new kitten (4 months old) in our bathroom as base camp going on 2 weeks. Little buddy was finishing up antibiotics for ringworm and we were reluctant to do any scent swapping during the first week for the safety of our resident girl (6 years old).

We have been trying to do scent swapping and reward our resident girl for any interest in the door, but she’s showing little to none. She’s not super food motivated add still hisses if I come out of the bathroom smelling like the kitten - she doesn’t seem to hiss at my husband, so I guess I’m the bad guy 😅

We were considering relocating kitten base camp to our guest room to give him a little more room and change of scenery, but that would entail moving him from one end of the house to the end where our resident girl has been spending most of her time. Would this cause undue stress for her?

I purchased a temporary mesh screen door that I was hopeful we could use for introductions, but since my resident girl is showing little interest in the bathroom door currently and hisses at kitten’s scent, I’m not sure if this is the appropriate time to start using it?

I know intros can take awhile, but I don’t want to keep the little one cooped up indefinitely and I very VERY much don’t want to do anything that will negatively impact our resident princess.

Any advice or kind words appreciated!
 

Kwik

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Welcome to TCS and Congrats on your new baby. So what is kittens name and what is your 6 yr old name?

Did the Vet give you the 'all clear' on the little ones health or is he still under quarantine - I'm guessing besides the ringworm hes been tested ,vaxxed?

I wouldn't move little one to the room where your girl stays unless I've misread what your asking.A safe room would be nice for the kitten to start out in provided it was kitten proofed,he had safe hidey places etc but not where your girl stays unless you closed the door to keep her out of there

Its not a bad thing she's showing no interest in the bathroom door ,she's well aware kitten is in there so if it is safe ( health wise) then scent swapping ( items)would be in order first before putting up your mesh divider

Any photos? We do love photos!
 

Mamanyt1953

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Now, I read that as the guest room is on the same end of the house as where your resident cat stays, but not the same room. Yes, please clear that up, as it makes a real difference in our suggestions.

Names are always good...I just hate thinking of them as "Whatshisface" and "Whatsherface." And there is no such thing as "too many" cat pictures!
 
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LalaLois

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Welcome to TCS and Congrats on your new baby. So what is kittens name and what is your 6 yr old name?

Did the Vet give you the 'all clear' on the little ones health or is he still under quarantine - I'm guessing besides the ringworm hes been tested ,vaxxed?

I wouldn't move little one to the room where your girl stays unless I've misread what your asking.A safe room would be nice for the kitten to start out in provided it was kitten proofed,he had safe hidey places etc but not where your girl stays unless you closed the door to keep her out of there

Its not a bad thing she's showing no interest in the bathroom door ,she's well aware kitten is in there so if it is safe ( health wise) then scent swapping ( items)would be in order first before putting up your mesh divider

Any photos? We do love photos!
Meet Lala, our resident princess, and Georgie, our new addition!

Little guy is cleared and up to date on his shots, so no worries there! I was contemplating moving him to our guest room where he would have a bit more space than the bathroom. Our girl doesn’t spend much time in the guest room and we could easily keep the door closed so it was safe for him, but she does spend time in the living room, which is where the guest room is located off of. We noticed little guy feeling a little cooped up and logistically is a better spot so we can get our second bathroom back. Definitely willing to wait it out if moving him doesn’t seem like a good idea!

We’ve started trying to scent swap, but it hasn’t been easy - Lala either shows no interest, hisses, or seems a little out of sorts. I’m feeling stuck on how to help her or work through her hissy feelings. I’ve tried treats, but the second she sniffs it, she wants nothing to do with the treats anymore.
 

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Kwik

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Meet Lala, our resident princess, and Georgie, our new addition!

Little guy is cleared and up to date on his shots, so no worries there! I was contemplating moving him to our guest room where he would have a bit more space than the bathroom. Our girl doesn’t spend much time in the guest room and we could easily keep the door closed so it was safe for him, but she does spend time in the living room, which is where the guest room is located off of. We noticed little guy feeling a little cooped up and logistically is a better spot so we can get our second bathroom back. Definitely willing to wait it out if moving him doesn’t seem like a good idea!

We’ve started trying to scent swap, but it hasn’t been easy - Lala either shows no interest, hisses, or seems a little out of sorts. I’m feeling stuck on how to help her or work through her hissy feelings. I’ve tried treats, but the second she sniffs it, she wants nothing to do with the treats anymore.
Oh WOW- I love them-Lala is Gorgeous and lil Georgie is beyond adorable!

Thanks for clarifying and giving those specific details- I would absolutely move Georgie into the guest room and please spend a good amount of time with him in there because it's yet another unfamiliar space and not expanding the space he was already in for weeks - he will be starting over only thing he will know is you and whatever goes with him from the 1st space ( bathroom)

I'm guessing his bed & /or blankets,toys,food dishes,water sources and litter box- it really does take a new kitty around 30 days to firmly establish his territory so give him a minute to settle in with his own scents before scent swapping as I'm sure the guest room already has Lala's scent in it,enough for right now

I do like the fact it's near the living space where Lala does hang out- she may show some interest but not important right now- it is important little one gets familiar and feels safe and secure in the new space- one step at a time

Take it all slowly,step by step and giving each of them the individual attention and play time they need ---- next you'll begin to scent swap

Hope that helps,,- we will be here every step along the way....proper introductions result in peaceful companionship and contentment,no reason for it not to go well👍
 

Kwik

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L LalaLois I noticed Georgie enjoys lying in the sink- so probably safe to say he enjoys the view from above,cats that enjoy their vertical space feel safe looking over a terrotory- it would be great for Georgie to have a window perch or hammock or a cat tree- I'm sure he'd take to it right away
 
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LalaLois

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L LalaLois I noticed Georgie enjoys lying in the sink- so probably safe to say he enjoys the view from above,cats that enjoy their vertical space feel safe looking over a terrotory- it would be great for Georgie to have a window perch or hammock or a cat tree- I'm sure he'd take to it right away
Already purchased a second cat tree so each kitty has space! But thank you for the suggestion, we’ll move it into the guest room with him for the time being!
 

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Already purchased a second cat tree so each kitty has space! But thank you for the suggestion, we’ll move it into the guest room with him for the time being!
Hello L LalaLois , Lala and Georgie and welcome to TCS! The suggestions you've received so far are great, and you're doing a wonderful job with the slow, careful introductions. Having a tree for each cat is really great. Most cats enjoy them and will use them for scratching, climbing, observing and relaxing. And I agree 100% with Kwik Kwik in wanting Georgie to have more space. Hoping all goes well and looking forward to updates and pix!
 

Calr0007

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Anxious new kitten mom, still trying to navigate!

We currently have had our new kitten (4 months old) in our bathroom as base camp going on 2 weeks. Little buddy was finishing up antibiotics for ringworm and we were reluctant to do any scent swapping during the first week for the safety of our resident girl (6 years old).

We have been trying to do scent swapping and reward our resident girl for any interest in the door, but she’s showing little to none. She’s not super food motivated add still hisses if I come out of the bathroom smelling like the kitten - she doesn’t seem to hiss at my husband, so I guess I’m the bad guy 😅

We were considering relocating kitten base camp to our guest room to give him a little more room and change of scenery, but that would entail moving him from one end of the house to the end where our resident girl has been spending most of her time. Would this cause undue stress for her?

I purchased a temporary mesh screen door that I was hopeful we could use for introductions, but since my resident girl is showing little interest in the bathroom door currently and hisses at kitten’s scent, I’m not sure if this is the appropriate time to start using it?

I know intros can take awhile, but I don’t want to keep the little one cooped up indefinitely and I very VERY much don’t want to do anything that will negatively impact our resident princess.

Any advice or kind words appreciated!
Hi! I also purchased the mesh door and it is amazing. I am week 4 into introductions, to be fair the new kitty (Nelly) was recovering from her spay for 2 of those.

I would keep doing what you are doing, and definitely move new kitty to the bigger room so she is more comfy. Put new kitty in a bathroom for short periods to let the resident kitty go in new kitty room. This helped a lot in my opinion with the scent. Marley (resident cat) didn’t seem phased by the sock or washcloth, like it wasn’t enough but him going in her room gave him plenty to smell and get used to. Once he was used to that, I put the screen up and a baby gate. I would crack the door more and more each day until the could see each other for long periods of time with no reaction. I also got a PetCube camera from Amazon for like $30 to watch if I was downstairs. I figured they would act different if I wasn’t hovering over them. The camera has been great to watch body language to let me know when to take more steps. A few days ago, I took the baby gate down so it’s just the screen and Marley, has been a gem, sitting intently at the screen, no aggression. Nelly is still a bit afraid of him but she is getting closer to him at the screen. This really worked for me, slow and steady has been really painful but I am hopeful it will all be worth it. Next steps for me are no barriers which I am terrified to do!!! I am combing the forum now to see how people who live alone have done face to face successfully.

Good luck and stay strong!!!
 

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Hi! I also purchased the mesh door and it is amazing. I am week 4 into introductions, to be fair the new kitty (Nelly) was recovering from her spay for 2 of those.

I would keep doing what you are doing, and definitely move new kitty to the bigger room so she is more comfy. Put new kitty in a bathroom for short periods to let the resident kitty go in new kitty room. This helped a lot in my opinion with the scent. Marley (resident cat) didn’t seem phased by the sock or washcloth, like it wasn’t enough but him going in her room gave him plenty to smell and get used to. Once he was used to that, I put the screen up and a baby gate. I would crack the door more and more each day until the could see each other for long periods of time with no reaction. I also got a PetCube camera from Amazon for like $30 to watch if I was downstairs. I figured they would act different if I wasn’t hovering over them. The camera has been great to watch body language to let me know when to take more steps. A few days ago, I took the baby gate down so it’s just the screen and Marley, has been a gem, sitting intently at the screen, no aggression. Nelly is still a bit afraid of him but she is getting closer to him at the screen. This really worked for me, slow and steady has been really painful but I am hopeful it will all be worth it. Next steps for me are no barriers which I am terrified to do!!! I am combing the forum now to see how people who live alone have done face to face successfully.

Good luck and stay strong!!!
Congrats C Calr0007

Why don't you start a thread about your kitties- I live alone,it's no problem- be happy to offer you suggestions

Cute kitty cats😻😻

If you already did & I somehow missed it maybe you csn just post the link?
 

Calr0007

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Congrats C Calr0007

Why don't you start a thread about your kitties- I live alone,it's no problem- be happy to offer you suggestions

Cute kitty cats😻😻

If you already did & I somehow missed it maybe you csn just post the link?
Oh I did! Haha it is a long thread because I was so panicked in the beginning desperate for advice! See below!

Cat intro help!!
 

Mamanyt1953

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Yep, I'm all in favor of the move. And...although some VERY well respected cat behaviorists seem to believe that there should NEVER be hissing during introductions, I consider that to be the "ideal" rather than the norm. Think of it this way...you have two children getting to know each other. IF the mamas intervene every single time they disagree, they will never get a chance to work out their differences and come to a compromise that both can live with. Think of hisses as more..."heated disagreements." Especially if there is no physical altercation. And sometimes, a cat's gotta say what a cat's gotta say! A hiss or two (or twenty) isn't a failure, it's part of the process.
 

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You're absolutely right, Mamanyt1953 Mamanyt1953 . Cats, like people, have to work things out and cats, like people, tend to be territorial and often opinionated.
It's a very rare cat introduction that doesn't include hisses, growls, and physical confrontations. As long as no one is hurt, these things, unfortunately, are part of establishing "pecking order" and figuring out how to coexist.
 
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LalaLois

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Hi! I also purchased the mesh door and it is amazing. I am week 4 into introductions, to be fair the new kitty (Nelly) was recovering from her spay for 2 of those.

I would keep doing what you are doing, and definitely move new kitty to the bigger room so she is more comfy. Put new kitty in a bathroom for short periods to let the resident kitty go in new kitty room. This helped a lot in my opinion with the scent. Marley (resident cat) didn’t seem phased by the sock or washcloth, like it wasn’t enough but him going in her room gave him plenty to smell and get used to. Once he was used to that, I put the screen up and a baby gate. I would crack the door more and more each day until the could see each other for long periods of time with no reaction. I also got a PetCube camera from Amazon for like $30 to watch if I was downstairs. I figured they would act different if I wasn’t hovering over them. The camera has been great to watch body language to let me know when to take more steps. A few days ago, I took the baby gate down so it’s just the screen and Marley, has been a gem, sitting intently at the screen, no aggression. Nelly is still a bit afraid of him but she is getting closer to him at the screen. This really worked for me, slow and steady has been really painful but I am hopeful it will all be worth it. Next steps for me are no barriers which I am terrified to do!!! I am combing the forum now to see how people who live alone have done face to face successfully.

Good luck and stay strong!!!
Thanks for the kind words! It’s definitely been a process! I’m so glad the mesh door worked for you!
 
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LalaLois

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Yep, I'm all in favor of the move. And...although some VERY well respected cat behaviorists seem to believe that there should NEVER be hissing during introductions, I consider that to be the "ideal" rather than the norm. Think of it this way...you have two children getting to know each other. IF the mamas intervene every single time they disagree, they will never get a chance to work out their differences and come to a compromise that both can live with. Think of hisses as more..."heated disagreements." Especially if there is no physical altercation. And sometimes, a cat's gotta say what a cat's gotta say! A hiss or two (or twenty) isn't a failure, it's part of the process.
Thank you! I needed to hear this! We moved Georgie to the guest room, but Lala sits outside the door and hisses. It’s definitely felt disheartening because we have actually only heard Lala hiss once at the vet in the two years we’ve had her. I’m trying to remind myself it will take time, but feeling sad because I don’t want my girl to be stressed or upset!
 

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Thank you! I needed to hear this! We moved Georgie to the guest room, but Lala sits outside the door and hisses. It’s definitely felt disheartening because we have actually only heard Lala hiss once at the vet in the two years we’ve had her. I’m trying to remind myself it will take time, but feeling sad because I don’t want my girl to be stressed or upset!
Of course you don't. But just like a kid's first day at school, it's a huge transition and one that will involve a lot of adapting and getting to know the other.
 

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This is my experience with four kittens (one at a time) that I rescued from out side! I have a large cage (used to have German shepherds), that I put the kitten in with litter box water and food bowl! I cover the cage with an old comforter! The cage stays where all three cats can hear and smell the kitten! My female is the most agressive and hisses and growls for a couple days. One male will sniff and listen and the other male ( a very affectionate cat) sniffs and smetime lays down near the cage! After they begin to ignore the kitten I take the cover off! Similar results! This lasts for a few days to one time two weeks, untill they kind of accpt the kittens prescence! Then I open the cage and the meetings begin! The female usually ignores them and warns them not to bother her! The two males accept the kitten one just kind of avoids any play, and the other loves to play ! Now the female was a former feral cat and I'm the only one she accepts! The two males were domestic! Cats rule, so it's all up to your (main) cat! All these kittens were adopted and I think two of the cats were relieved when the kitten finally disappeared! Remember again it's up to your resident cat!! good luck!!
 

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EXCELLENT post, R RTR ! My little feral girl🌈, who is my avatar and was rescued as a small kitten, only ever bonded to me, but she lived indoors-only in my large feline family and for a time, after I adopted Elvis🌈, she was very interested in him, until she wasn't. This by way of saying that every cat, like every human, is unique and different, and one never knows, as it is said, with cats ;)
 
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LalaLois

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Okay, back with some updates!

We tried the mesh door method, Lala only hissed a couple of times. She never came up to the door, but didn’t seem aggressive or afraid either, so we decided to let Georgie out for some supervised visits. We’re on visit #3 and Lala is still not loving it. She’s hissy and growly at both myself and Georgie. He has tried to approach her, but she instantly hisses. He doesn’t seem to be fearful of her, just interested. Lala seems to run away from him and get herself as high as possible.

We’ve tried distracting her with treats and play and it seems like she’s willing to participate with us, but can’t stand him. Attaching a pic of their latest interaction - she was growling, but he hopped up on the windowsill and just laid there. I tried to distract them both to alleviate any aggression and Georgie took the bait easily and hopped down to go explore. Is he being passive aggressive (can cats be passive aggressive 😅) or friendly?

Any tips on how to help them transition? I so appreciate you all for listening to my anxious thoughts! View attachment IMG_7936.jpeg
 
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