Can You Share Experiences About Working With Abused Cats?

[Anne]

I'm working on an article about how to get an abused cat to trust you. If anyone here can share their experiences that would be very helpful. I have the basics down (it's not that complicated, after all) but I think stories from people would really help.

Please include the cat's story, how he/she got to you, what you did to gain their trust and what the end result was.

Thank you!

 

[IndyJones]

Patience is key. Love and patience will help an abused cat become a loving family member.

Kabby is an OSPCA rescue who was seized from a bad situation. I believe he might have been living in a dirty enclosure outside because he was full of flies and his white fur was still stained yellow on his legs and belly even though he was washed and dipped multiple times.

He was terrified of anything with casters (computer chairs, garbage cans etc) and hated storms to the point of pacing and panting. He also had severe separation anxiety.

I worked with him by sitting on the computer chair and holding him. I did this for increasing amounts of time each day and over time he got better and better now he will even jump up on the chair by himself and sleep there.

With storms I would cuddle him and play a CD of storm sounds he also has a weighted jacket called thunder shirt. This really helped him with the anxiety. Now he doesn't even need the shirt anymore and I can leave him while there is a thunderstorm.

For the separation anxiety I leave the tv on when I leave. He still licks himself bald if I'm gone more than a few hours but he is much better than he was.

 

[losna]

We adopted Bêlit from the same shelter we adopted our other two. She had been abused, starved, had a UTI that was so bad it was life threatening, and untreated advanced kidney disease. The vet was in incoherent rage after her examination. I've never seen the vet angry like that before. >.<

We had it much easier than usual I think, because for some reason she seemed to have bonded with me almost immediately, although that doesn't mean she wasn't afraid, just that it was easier for me to approach her. At the shelter they told me that she would always react when I walked in, and follow my movements with her ears. Several families wanted to adopt her between when we first saw her and were able to actually take her home, but she would always run away from them and hide when brought into the meeting rooms. It was also easier because she wasn't afraid of other cats and really took to Sinbad (who is a very protective guardian type of cat); they were cuddling and grooming each other within days of meeting, and she began imitating him.

We kept her in a bathroom for a while because it was a small enclosed space, and I would periodically go in and just sit with her. I learned that she was the most comfortable if I just lay down and closed my eyes, so I started bringing in some pillows and a blanket and doing my best to sleep. Then we added the office - I would bring her in with me and again, just sit and let her hide or explore as she wanted. Mostly she would curl against my feet, snuggling and hiding between them.

The main thing is patience and love as IndyJones said, as well as observation; figure out what is scary. Bêlit was terrified by sudden movements, loud sounds, and what I call tallness. So we left her alone letting her hide or come out as she wanted, and did most of our early interaction with her on the stairs. When we saw her up on the top steps, we would sit down on the lower steps and wait, letting her approach. She was much less threatened/afraid if she started with the high ground.

She was also afraid that her food will be taken away, or that she will be punished for eating. We had a real problem for a while with her stealing Sinbad's food. Now we shut her in the bathroom during mealtimes, this prevents her from speed gulping her food and stealing Sinbad's, and also helps her feel safe.

She is still jumpy, will run and hide if we come around a corner unexpectedly, and doesn't want to eat with company. She likes to have hidey holes. But she is the sweetest, most loving cat. As far as I can tell, every day now is her best day ever. She's gone from being scared all the time to loving belly rubs, nose kisses, and snuggles. It's been a really amazing transformation to be a part of.

 

[di and bob]

Time, patience, and good treats, all tame the feral and the scared. Moving slow, no loud noises or voices, getting the little one to trust you with good food, and good feelings about being near you. Sit near the place you leave the treats/food and move closer over time as they allow. Reach slowly down one day and touch them, be prepared for lunging away, but each time becomes a little easier and longer. It also helps to have them see another cat interacting with you and liking it. Like a mother cat getting rubs brings the kittens closer. I have used all these tips with countless ferals and strays that show up, and there has NEVER been one that doesn't eventually come around.

 

[Kieka]

One of my rainbow kitties was likely abused.

When I was around 10 or 11 I was visiting my grandmother with my brother. My grandmother took us to get ice cream at a little parlor near her house. A lot of the surrounding stores were closed or empty so it was just the three of us sitting on the patio eating our ice cream. I saw a guy in the distance walking towards us playing with a hackey sack (a little beanbag that you kick and hit to keep in the air). As he got closer he missed the hackey sack and it feel to the ground. It started moving and skittered off to the side. He grabbed it up again and started tossing it around more. When he got to us he asked if we wanted a kitten. My grandmother's back had been to him and she hadn't seen what I had. She said no. The guy shrugged and looked around. He then tossed the kitten in the gutter and walked away.

My brother went and got the kitten. My grandmother had two cats at home who hissed at the little kitten so I went home the next day with a kitten. His name would become Cinnamon.

We are pretty sure that Cinnamon had brain damage from being treated like a ball plus whatever else had happened to him. He was filthy, flea covered, skinny and a very subdue little kitten. At probably around 8 weeks old he rarely played and had to be taught what a litter box was. We had a year old cat at home and he accepted Cinnamon without any problem. They coexisted in our home but never really bonded. Cinnamon never had any desire to fight with other cats and just quietly watched things around him.

Cinnamon always had a problem with men. He was obsessive in his cleaning; if you touched him he had to reclean himself. He would frequently not recognize you if you had new shoes on or new clothes. He loved being in the room with us but he didn't want anyone to pay attention to him. As he got older his memory issues got worse and he would often wander around the yard meowing until someone called to him in addition to getting worse about recognizing people (although oddly enough he never was afraid of or had problems with my niece who was 4 when he passed away). We used to call him the roommate cat; because he acted more like someone who rented a room from us then a part of the family. He was in his late teens, 17 or 18, when he didn't come home one day. We searched and called for him but he was gone. My Mom still feels guilty to this day that she didn't start keeping him inside or call him in every hour when she knew his memory was fading and he was getting older.

I was just a kid but I think the only thing we did for him was accept him as he was and not push him past his comfort level. We never tried to push him past what he wanted to do and would say hi when he walked in the room without approaching him or demanding anything from him. We gave him a safe home and love.

I don't know if Rocket would be considered abused. She was neglected and a feral from a hoarder situation when I got her at four months old. The same lots of love and not pushing her past her comfort level once she was socialized. Because she was feral though the initial period did include pushing her a little so that so would realize humans were her friends. But that I took nice and slow and paid attention to not push her too fast or hard. It took me 6 months to get her to the point where she was comfortable with me and 2 years to be comfortable with my Mom; she still isn't comfortable with my Dad.

 

[Anne]

Thank you all so much for your contributions! I'll definitely be using these tips and stories in the article!

 

[maggie101]

In 2014 a mom gave birth to 2 kittens on my porch. I could tell the mama was very excited about something then her kittens came out of the bushes.The brother got adopted. The mom had another litter of 4 which a rescue took in. I could tell one day that the mama was very upset about something.some one had taken her female kitten! The sister came back on my porch 1 yr old with a litter of 5. Her kittens got adopted She became bff with another cat for 2 1/2 yrs. A friend of mine got did tnr on the 2 cats. Her bff left her soon after. I took her in a few weeks later by grabbing by the scruff of the neck then she immediately started purring. She was always hiding but loved to be picked up, brushed, and played with. The person that adopted her brought her back because of her hiding. She thought the cat was traumatized which I believe was true since she is scared but wants to be held. Plus, she was abandoned by the people that took her and her bff. She has been on trauma, scaredy cat, and self esteem spirit of essence. Now she will not leave my bedroom but eats with my 3 cats in the kitchen.

 

[gitabooks]

Sounds like an awesome article!

The way to a cat's heart is through their stomach. We have a male tomcat that comes around our property that was hit by a car. While not purposeful abuse, the poor guy does not trust people at all, and is fearful because of his disability (he has a permanent limp and some hearing and possible sight issues).
He comes around when he wants food or shelter, then goes off elsewhere to do his thing. But the one thing is trusts me for is to bring food. If I have food he lets me get near him, he even let me touch him once while eating, but any other time he avoids me (if he sees/hears me, that is) or watches for a distance.

Also, if a cat shows trust and approaches you, don't push on the matter. You can spoil the moment and set progress back by reaching out towards them. With my shy cats I purposefully avoid eye contact, directing myself towards them or walking straight for them (I walk in a semi-circle around them). This way they know you mean no predatory or aggressive intent because such creatures face their prey head-on and stare at them.

 

[maggie101]

More to how I got CoCo: when she was outside, I could not approach her but day by day I would move the bowl of food closer to me. Eventually I was able to put my hand on the bowl, scratch her cheeks, then over the head. She rubbed against the chair leg outside so I put my hand on it so she would rub against my hand. I started putting my hand on the ground then in a fist so she would rub against it and sniff. I left a toy outside for her and she would play with it. Outside I could not play with her but inside I could. My cats still hiss at her. CoCo does not defend herself at all. She does not hiss or growl back at my cats or stand on her haunches. Instead, quivers her little tail and hides. I even took her to the vet to check her hearing and eyesight. She is fine. Right after eating in the kitchen she is back in my bedroom but I can tell she really wants to leave. She some times sits right at the door but will not go past it. Maybe the people that took her left her in one room?

 

[maggie101]

Another thing- in the beginning, If I walk toward her she would run away but on my hands and knees she would not. I was no longer a threat to her at eyesite. Over her head I am

 

[Graceful-Lily]

I don't know if this counts but the cats in my neighborhood are often neglected and abused by those who live here. There was a little black kitten that came into my backyard once, I rescued him but my mother had me put him back outside. Not too long after he was released, I saw some kids throwing him up into the air. He was crying for help and I cried so hard because I thought it was my fault. I never saw him again. I called animal services but no one did anything. I'm sure if it were a puppy, they'd be at their door as soon as possible. I even went as far as to sneak onto their property when they weren't home to try and get the kitten back but it didn't work. He had 2 other siblings. They locked him in a garbage container and I have no idea what happened to him. Anyway, most of the cats around here are really neglected and mistreated. Some of the worse animal abuse I've seen in my life. Often time, they have a very hard time trusting humans and when they do accept their caregivers (if they ever do that is) they probably won't accept anyone else into their tight circle. It takes a very high degree of patience. Sometimes it takes years before they trust again. Some of them once did have homes but as soon as they passed the "cute kitten" stage, they were abused or neglected. I saw it happen time and time again. Patience and a very very warm and safe environment is crucial. It's also very sad watching them eat fast because they probably haven't eaten in days or are afraid of where their next meal is coming from. It just really takes a tole on their mental health. I've been depressed cats and cats with high levels of anxiety. Really heart breaking.

Hazel was a special case since she is Felix's sister. It's been a whole entire year of working with her and she is still very frightened and fearful of humans. I haven't heard from her foster mother in a while so I hope all is well.

*This is all based on my own experience. Some may have have different opinions on the matter.*

 

[maggie101]

I need to edit my post a little. Her kitten that disappeared was from the first litter. She disappeared at 5 weeks old then came back a year old. I have had her 8 months and my cats still don't like her. She loves to be brushed, extremely playful, kneads her paws, and purrs. Possibly kneads her paws so much because she was separated early. When I go to bed she is gets very excited. Meows, runs in a circle, and jumps on the bed then rubs all over my face and wraps her body around me. I push her off so I don't suffocate then she kneads her paws constantly. I use baby blankets for when she does that.I have lots of videos of her. Trying to figure out how to do that

 

[maggie101]

 

[maggie101]

Good luck on your article!

 

[catlover73]

My rainbow bridge kitty Baby-T was adopted by me when she was a year old. Someone abandoned her in my friend's pick up truck in Chicago during the winter. My vet told me she would probably have died in that truck if my friend and his roommate did not decide to go get food in the middle of the night. They took her into their apartment immediately when they found her. These guys had never had any pets growing up. They were going to keep her inside and find her a home on their own. They were in a no pets building and the landlord was threatening to evict them over the cat. My friend called me and asked if I knew anyone that could take the cat and I said I would make some phone calls. My first call was to my landlord and she gave me permission to adopt the cat.

My friend picked me up and then I had to figure out how to get a terrified cat out from behind a large couch. My friend agreed to run to the store and get some baby food. He then got his roommates to agree to leave for a while so I could have the place to myself. It took me over an hour to coax her out of hiding and into a carrier. When I got her home she ran and hid in my roomate's laundry. We let her hide and left wet food near the laundry pile for her. My roommate and I actually shared my clothes for a week to help Baby-T feel safe. We realized quickly that she was really scared to eat. Also one of her back legs was really red and she had a limp. I took her to the vet to get her leg checked. It was at the vet appointment that I found out she had been kicked around. There were broken bones that had healed wrong. She had an infection in her leg. She was so tiny I thought she was a kitten and not an adult. My vet had experience socializing ferrals and gave me tips on how to get Baby-T to eat. My vet gave me a long-handled spoon to feed wet food with. Baby-T was too scared to eat off a plate. My roommate and I took turns feeding her with this spoon for weeks. Then we switched to a regular spoon and from there were able to transition her to a bowl. Once she realized it was safe to eat she became very trusting with us and stopped hiding all the time. She also bonded with our other cats quickly and soon started to eat dry food with them on her own.

Eventually we realized Baby-T was scared of men. A friend needed a place to stay. We talked to my landlord and she agreed to allow him to stay. He was a great handy man and helped her to maintain the property in lieu of rent. He had grown up with cats and understood the situation with Baby-T. He let her decide when she wanted to be around him. Once she would go in the same room as him we started letting him feed her with the spoon we used to gain her trust. In about 3 weeks she would let him pet her for short amounts of time. He stayed with us about 3 months and by the time he moved out Baby-T would hang out with him while we were at work.

Time and patience were my keys to getting Baby-T to learn to love and trust humans again. Over a period of years Baby-T came out of her shell completely and would interact with guests in our home. One of my hubby's friends was asleep on our couch and woke up to find Baby-T sleeping on him. He layed on the couch for over an hour because he did not want to disturb her. When she woke up and moved he had to run to the bathroom. This was the first time she had ever slept on a guest. My hubby' s friend is a cat person and he was very happy that she had chosen to come sleep on him.

 

[tarasgirl06]

One of my rainbow kitties was likely abused.

When I was around 10 or 11 I was visiting my grandmother with my brother. My grandmother took us to get ice cream at a little parlor near her house. A lot of the surrounding stores were closed or empty so it was just the three of us sitting on the patio eating our ice cream. I saw a guy in the distance walking towards us playing with a hackey sack (a little beanbag that you kick and hit to keep in the air). As he got closer he missed the hackey sack and it feel to the ground. It started moving and skittered off to the side. He grabbed it up again and started tossing it around more. When he got to us he asked if we wanted a kitten. My grandmother's back had been to him and she hadn't seen what I had. She said no. The guy shrugged and looked around. He then tossed the kitten in the gutter and walked away.

My brother went and got the kitten. My grandmother had two cats at home who hissed at the little kitten so I went home the next day with a kitten. His name would become Cinnamon.

We are pretty sure that Cinnamon had brain damage from being treated like a ball plus whatever else had happened to him. He was filthy, flea covered, skinny and a very subdue little kitten. At probably around 8 weeks old he rarely played and had to be taught what a litter box was. We had a year old cat at home and he accepted Cinnamon without any problem. They coexisted in our home but never really bonded. Cinnamon never had any desire to fight with other cats and just quietly watched things around him.

Cinnamon always had a problem with men. He was obsessive in his cleaning; if you touched him he had to reclean himself. He would frequently not recognize you if you had new shoes on or new clothes. He loved being in the room with us but he didn't want anyone to pay attention to him. As he got older his memory issues got worse and he would often wander around the yard meowing until someone called to him in addition to getting worse about recognizing people (although oddly enough he never was afraid of or had problems with my niece who was 4 when he passed away). We used to call him the roommate cat; because he acted more like someone who rented a room from us then a part of the family. He was in his late teens, 17 or 18, when he didn't come home one day. We searched and called for him but he was gone. My Mom still feels guilty to this day that she didn't start keeping him inside or call him in every hour when she knew his memory was fading and he was getting older.

I was just a kid but I think the only thing we did for him was accept him as he was and not push him past his comfort level. We never tried to push him past what he wanted to do and would say hi when he walked in the room without approaching him or demanding anything from him. We gave him a safe home and love.

I don't know if Rocket would be considered abused. She was neglected and a feral from a hoarder situation when I got her at four months old. The same lots of love and not pushing her past her comfort level once she was socialized. Because she was feral though the initial period did include pushing her a little so that so would realize humans were her friends. But that I took nice and slow and paid attention to not push her too fast or hard. It took me 6 months to get her to the point where she was comfortable with me and 2 years to be comfortable with my Mom; she still isn't comfortable with my Dad.

Thank you for rescuing, protecting, and loving Cinnamon, and Rocket. In future, if you see anyone doing anything harmful to a cat, please call the authorities. It is a felony to harm ANY cat in all 50 US States, and we must report this whenever we know about it.

 

[tarasgirl06]

I don't know of any direct physical abuse to any cat I have ever known (which is why I'm still free, seriously) but our beloved Queen Simba came to me starving, covered with sores, and sick. I was living in an apartment that did not allow cats (and I had already brought one kitten in, something I would never recommend because of the danger to the cat from landlords/managers; but I had to rescue her from the situation she was in) and so I would look for Simba every day, feed her, and try to clean her sores. Finally she was treed in the courtyard between our building and the one opposite, and the guy I lived with then brought her in. The rest is history. She was ravenous and tried to eat every bit of food in sight, so I had to make sure our other cat got her share. Simba was vetted, spayed, and adopted into our family, which got larger and moved as time went on. She was my beloved best friend, confidante, and family member for 16 years. She is ever in my heart.

 

[tarasgirl06]

I don't know if this counts but the cats in my neighborhood are often neglected and abused by those who live here. There was a little black kitten that came into my backyard once, I rescued him but my mother had me put him back outside. Not too long after he was released, I saw some kids throwing him up into the air. He was crying for help and I cried so hard because I thought it was my fault. I never saw him again. I called animal services but no one did anything. I'm sure if it were a puppy, they'd be at their door as soon as possible. I even went as far as to sneak onto their property when they weren't home to try and get the kitten back but it didn't work. He had 2 other siblings. They locked him in a garbage container and I have no idea what happened to him. Anyway, most of the cats around here are really neglected and mistreated. Some of the worse animal abuse I've seen in my life. Often time, they have a very hard time trusting humans and when they do accept their caregivers (if they ever do that is) they probably won't accept anyone else into their tight circle. It takes a very high degree of patience. Sometimes it takes years before they trust again. Some of them once did have homes but as soon as they passed the "cute kitten" stage, they were abused or neglected. I saw it happen time and time again. Patience and a very very warm and safe environment is crucial. It's also very sad watching them eat fast because they probably haven't eaten in days or are afraid of where their next meal is coming from. It just really takes a tole on their mental health. I've been depressed cats and cats with high levels of anxiety. Really heart breaking.

Hazel was a special case since she is Felix's sister. It's been a whole entire year of working with her and she is still very frightened and fearful of humans. I haven't heard from her foster mother in a while so I hope all is well.

*This is all based on my own experience. Some may have have different opinions on the matter.*

I don't know your location, but in all 50 US States it is a FELONY to harm ANY cat and these people need to be reported to the authorities right away.

 

[Graceful-Lily]

I don't know your location, but in all 50 US States it is a FELONY to harm ANY cat and these people need to be reported to the authorities right away.

I have reported people but nothing seems to happen. Lots of irresponsible pet owners where I live. They always say they'll get back to you or that they'll "look into it right away" but nothing happens. Especially when it involves cats. But dogs on the other hand, geez... If you don't take matters into your own hands sometimes, lives will be lost. It's a very failed and broken system.

 

[IndyJones]

Reminds me a bit of the way things are here too.

Our neighbours chain their yellow lab dog up and it barks at everything cars, bikes, pedestrians, children, me when I'm in my own yard.

They have even had it chained up when the rain is teaming down and there is no shelter except a tree when it's outside. I wish they'd put a dog house out for it at least.

Called the city about it but nothing happens