Bombay - Beautiful but Antisocial

ckuk

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Hi all

Joined this forum looking for some advice hopefully.

We have a lovely Bombay male, JJ, aged about 8 years now. He was the "runt of the litter" when we took him into our care as a kitten. We also took his brother, Marley - another beautiful kitten, with tabby markings. You would never think they were from the same litter. Sadly, we lost Marley aged about 2.5yrs, following what we believe to be an injury sustained from a moving vehicle. He withdrew to a neighbours garden, where he succumbed to his wounds.

So, back to JJ. I think what's troubling us is why he is so unaffectionate, which goes against everything we've read about the Bombay breed. I don't recall him being this way as a kitten. He'll never voluntarily jump on your lap, nor will he settle for more than 1 second should you pick him up and place him on your lap. He just doesn't like it. We do pick him up daily for a cuddle, probably against his will, but he soon wants to wriggle free and alert us to his empty saucer.

Another thing is, he will look for the nearest exit should there be a knock at the front door, or a visitor arriving in the room. In fact, quite often he will run from us for no apparent reason. He will never come running, if you call to him. He'd rather sit under a conifer in the rain, staring at you, than actually come into the warm and dry.

He only seems to be interested in getting fed (like any breed I guess). When he is wanting food, he doesn't miaow like perhaps most other breeds, but simply a 'mah" sort of sound. Unusual, but probably not the only cat that doesn't vocalise their requirements in the traditional manner!

One thing he does like, is to shelter under blankets etc. We will make little 'dens' for him, which he loves. And as winter approaches, he will quite happily jump on the bed and wants to get inside under the duvet, and settle for a short kip in the warmth. Until he's had enough (about 10 mins) and then can't get out quick enough.

So it's a bit baffling why he is so anti-social and will often run away from us for no reason, like we're strangers. And yet all we've ever shown him is love and care. But perhaps there's some reason, maybe wandered into someone else's house and been mistreated? Or bullied by neighbourhood cats, but then why would that make him anti-human? Or perhaps because he lost his brother early on?

We accept him and love him regardless, but just want to understand and learn more about why he is the way he is.

Right now he's curled up on the sofa fast asleep, cute as can be, with one ear assessing the playlist on BBC Radio 6 (his favourite station).

Very grateful for any advice or insight.

Thanks in advance.

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di and bob

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As you found out, being social and people-oriented is not in his genetic makeup as it is in many Bombays. Just like with humans they can have different personalities and definitely different ways of interpreting the world around them. Your boy is what he is, especially at 8 years old, somewhat more timid, though I'm sure he hides it well with you, who he feels comfortable with. He is like many cats and does not handle changes and new people well. My cats disappear for days when company comes, I have to put a litter box, food, and water in the room they are hiding in. My other cats used to come out and greet guests, it is just in their personalities which are which, since they are all related and raised by us.
His unusual vocalization can mean he has perhaps a little more oriental in his gene makeup. The Burmese is half of his genetic makeup. The characteristics of his breed are the norm, but are not guaranteed. They are very loyal to their human families, but independent too, yours is more than usual. He is not a 'cuddler', most cats are when they are very young but outgrow it. He did more then usual. I'm sure you love and accept him for who he is, just as he does you. He loves you and is part of the family, you are all tied together by the love that is binding you together.
 
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ckuk

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Thanks so much for taking the time to post such an informative reply, very much appreciated.
 

di and bob

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There are breeders and very knowledgable people on this site that may help you even more. If you don't receive many answers, just post one line or two and your post will come back up to the top of the list!
 

susanm9006

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I would give up on forcing him into a daily cuddle by picking him up. Some cats react to this by wanting to have less to do with their humans. Instead offer him a treat if he comes up to see you so that cuddle time is totally positive for him. Something like an Inaba Churu might entice him.
 
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