Big boss cat biting others

[cataholic07]

I have 3 cats, two one year old cats (1yr and 3 months) full brothers, and a 4 month old kitten. Fynnegan (grey and white one) really likes to waltz over to either of them and bite hard, sometimes the back of neck or back, sometimes the front of the neck. Like when the others aren't doing anything, sometimes sleeping. Sometimes when Ceriah was running around, and then stops he will grab her to. He doesn't let go until the others claws or teeth get to him before we can. We do play with him lots, and spend time with him. Unlike the others he very rarely is a lap cat and is usually doing his own thing. He also tires out very easily too. Even though he is young he doesn't really have a massive ton of energy. He will also only play with wand toys or play chase with the others, he doesn't play with regular toys. When we play with the wand toy sometimes its just him and Ceriah, sometimes all 3. But he is very good at letting the others take turns and won't run them over lol.

We have 4 cat trees in various rooms 3 upstairs, 1 downstairs (2 are pagoda, the other two are box types), 3 litter boxes, 2 hammock cat trees, and lots of toys. He does sleep with his brother Jethro all the time, they cuddle up and groom, it's the cutest thing, and he even is sleeping with Ceriah a lot now. Sometimes he can be sleeping, and wake up and then bite his brother on the neck like he had a bad dream lol.

This is something he has always done since 6 months old. I feel really bad for Ceriah and Jethro, lots of times making loud noises won't startle him off, so you have to remove him. Both boys play very rough, but Jetty is getting better. I know boy cats can take awhile to stop playing rough though? They have been with each other since birth (their bro roscoe was adopted at 4 months old, we kept these two), and we have fostered other kittens too in the mean time (Ceriah is a foster fail lol) so it's not only kitten jerk syndrome lol. But they were taken away from mom at 4-5 weeks old as they were found in a barn in October (in a horse stall where a horse was and in winter) and mom was too feral to stay with them. So they didn't really have a role model after 8 weeks old when they came to me. Is this something that will stop or is there something more I need to do? I will be giving the boys bach flower essences again to see if it will help to. Like 98% of the time they are getting along amazingly lol.

 

[susanm9006]

They are all beautiful! Assuming the boys have been neutered, the biting thing is probably about dominance and/or love. While it does seem odd it , having a mouthful of the other cat’s neck can his way of showing affection. The important thing is that while the other cats may squeal, hiss
or bite him back, they aren’t afraid of him and there seem to be plenty of loving times between them. So personally I would let them resolve the issue and not step him. One of the others may challenge him with a real nip or slap if they get too tired of his behavior. Otherwise he remains the sometimes annoying brother that they still love.

 

[ArtNJ]

Its rough play and normal. Cats are predators, and most of their play behaviors are practice hunting behaviors -- stalking, pouncing and yes, biting the neck. Many cats do this to each other, but the roughness does admittedly vary quite a bit. Still, doing it hard enough to cause a little squealing is not uncommon, particularly when the "victim" is smaller, like a kitten. The squealing is a protest "I don't like this!" noise, not an "I'm being hurt" noise. Think of an indian sunburn as an analogy -- human little bro will call for mom, but it doesn't actually hurt enough to change the fact that he still wants to play with big bro all the time. Cats hold grudges, and if they were actually being hurt, they wouldn't cuddle up like that later. By cuddling up and not holding a grudge, they are telling you that all is well overall.

Now with human kids, we don't let the big bro give little bro an indian sunburn. But that is because we can teach human kids how to play properly. To a degree anyway. With cats, you really can't. Sure, you can distract the "aggressor," if you see it, and that is nice for the other cats, but you won't teach him to play gentle. Mellowing with age will do that. So, for the most part, you can and should just let them be, intervening only if the "victim" seems particularly miserable. And be careful not to intervene too dramatically, because you don't want to discourage all play or make them scared of you.

 

[cataholic07]

Oh ok, from what I read you were supposed to separate if cats start playing too rough, so I didn't know you just let them learn. But I am glad they arent actually hurting each other. I can be a wee bit of an overprotective mommy lol. I only had one cat prior to my boys, so the whole multicat dynamics is still new to me lol. Felicity hated other cats, so we only fostered kittens until we had to euthanize her due to cancer. We ended up foster failing 2 from the litter we fostered a month after her death.