BH is still in big trouble after returning from a 3 day ER stay last night - liver and ??

[FeralHearts]

She pooped! Only a little - but she doesn't poop much these days. So that was good.

It will help get some toxic crap out of her system which should make her feel a bit better.

Meowmee btw what I meant by if it makes you feel better... I mean for Angie and you if they found it before she passed ... and honestly from what I've learned it would have been unlikely they would have found it or you would have saw it coming. The only reason we did is that BH has some pre-existing issues so they were thinking it was triditis and fatty liver - as that's what made sense. I never would have known and probably had beat myself up thinking I screwed up somehow.

You may have thought you screwed up too - and it's not your fault at all. Not one bit.

Does that make sense? I'm not sure I'm saying what I mean right as I'm pretty exhausted. Hopefully you understand what I mean. XOXOXOXOX

 

[Meowmee]

She pooped! Only a little - but she doesn't poop much these days. So that was good.

It will help get some toxic crap out of her system which should make her feel a bit better.

Meowmee btw what I meant by if it makes you feel better... I mean for Angie and you if they found it before she passed ... and honestly from what I've learned it would have been unlikely they would have found it or you would have saw it coming. The only reason we did is that BH has some pre-existing issues so they were thinking it was triditis and fatty liver - as that's what made sense. I never would have known and probably had beat myself up thinking I screwed up somehow.

You may have thought you screwed up too - and it's not your fault at all. Not one bit.

Does that make sense? I'm not sure I'm saying what I mean right as I'm pretty exhausted. Hopefully you understand what I mean. XOXOXOXOX

I am glad she pooped

yes I knew you meant that. thanks

I can’t really remember now exactly what type of cancer it was, I have to look at the necropsy report again which was done years ago because it was written there. It might not have been this specific one. I always wonder… because I usually look those things up so I would have had some idea. If I hadn’t let them give her convenia she might’ve had a chance…but convenia precipitated her death etc. either way.

* I found from a video I made then that it was that cancer maybe- cholangio carcinoma of the liver apparently. It doesn’t really make me feel any better though even after all these years, just one big heart break. I will have to check the actual necropsy report to confirm that because I might’ve been stressed/ confused when I made the video.

I found this description of it with two comments by people whose cats had cancer. The second comment said their cat has survived for six months since having surgery, they did not do chemo. I think because it was not recommended. However, they are giving her other, alternative medicine treatments.

The link says this is the most common type of cancer of the liver in cats. It could be caused by chemical exposure, liver flukes, and inflammation of the bile duct, IBD, etc. they don’t really know why. It has a very poor outlook for people too however, it seems to be more rare in people, one cause for people can be chrohn’s.

Bile Duct Cancer in Cats - Symptoms, Causes, Diagnosis, Treatment, Recovery, Management, Cost

Bile duct cancer is a common liver cancer that can be very difficult to treat, due to its fast metastasis rate and aggressive nature.

wagwalking.com

 

[FeralHearts]

We got a second poop later - so phew. Hopefully I will see that Jaundice go down again a bit now.

She's been walking around today. I'm going to offer her food again and see what she thinks of it all.

----

I am glad she pooped

yes I knew you meant that. thanks

Thank you - me too!

I'm glad you knew what I meant - sometimes I can be unclear.

I can’t really remember now exactly what type of cancer it was, I have to look at the necropsy report again which was done years ago because it was written there. It might not have been this specific one. I always wonder… because I usually look those things up so I would have had some idea. If I hadn’t let them give her convenia she might’ve had a chance…but convenia precipitated her death etc. either way.

*hugs*

Convenia has it's place but I agree it shouldn't be willing nilly given. I have a note on the furkids files that it's a no to convenia unless there is no other viable option.That is how Convenia is supposed to be used - as a last resort antibiotic when there is no other option.

BH had it years ago. A vet, not her current one, gave it to her after a bite wound in her leg sent her to the docs office. She was living the feral life at the time. The Doc didn't realize she came several times a day and that I was able to pill her fine - even back then. So I get why they gave it to her... I do wish they had asked though.

* I found from a video I made then that it was that cancer maybe- cholangio carcinoma of the liver apparently. It doesn’t really make me feel any better though even after all these years, just one big heart break. I will have to check the actual necropsy report to confirm that because I might’ve been stressed/ confused when I made the video.

I agree - it's one big heartbreak that never really heals up. You learn to cope and somewhat accept in a way... but it lingers.

I found this description of it with two comments by people whose cats had cancer. The second comment said their cat has survived for six months since having surgery, they did not do chemo. I think because it was not recommended. However, they are giving her other, alternative medicine treatments.

The surgery is major and the cancer usually has already spread / comes back. It's also risky as you are doing a liver resection. You'll no doubt not get it all.

It's not recommended as the treatment won't work sadly.

The link says this is the most common type of cancer of the liver in cats. It could be caused by chemical exposure, liver flukes, and inflammation of the bile duct, IBD, etc. they don’t really know why. It has a very poor outlook for people too however, it seems to be more rare in people, one cause for people can be chrohn’s.

http://[URL]https://wagwalking.com/cat/condition/bile-duct-cancer#

[/URL]

That is what I read too - on several sites.

I went and read the notes the one reference her Doc is mentioning has to do with the multiple issues. MST (median survival time) was listed as 270 days. That's when she went to an oncologist and asked about survival times / prognosis for her and any other treatment options.

 

[Meowmee]

We got a second poop later - so phew. Hopefully I will see that Jaundice go down again a bit now.

She's been walking around today. I'm going to offer her food again and see what she thinks of it all.

----



Thank you - me too!

I'm glad you knew what I meant - sometimes I can be unclear.




*hugs*

Convenia has it's place but I agree it shouldn't be willing nilly given. I have a note on the furkids files that it's a no to convenia unless there is no other viable option.That is how Convenia is supposed to be used - as a last resort antibiotic when there is no other option.

BH had it years ago. A vet, not her current one, gave it to her after a bite wound in her leg sent her to the docs office. She was living the feral life at the time. The Doc didn't realize she came several times a day and that I was able to pill her fine - even back then. So I get why they gave it to her... I do wish they had asked though.




I agree - it's one big heartbreak that never really heals up. You learn to cope and somewhat accept in a way... but it lingers.




The surgery is major and the cancer usually has already spread / comes back. It's also risky as you are doing a liver resection. You'll no doubt not get it all.

It's not recommended as the treatment won't work sadly.




That is what I read too - on several sites.

I went and read the notes the one reference her Doc is mentioning has to do with the multiple issues. MST (median survival time) was listed as 270 days. That's when she went to an oncologist and asked about survival times / prognosis for her and any other treatment options.

Agree except on convenia, I would like to see it off the market. I will never knowingly give that to any of my cats again and my opinion there is always another option- the antibiotics that we had in the past etc. Also, there need to be laws put in place that require DVM to inform you of every medication they are giving and warn you about all of the possible severe harmful side effects, etc.

They need to ask your permission to give a medication not just give it and that has happened to me before with other drugs too, not just with convenia with Fred.

Fortunately, Fred was OK but he stopped eating for 2 to 3 days. Also he had no bacterial infection! Or any sign of infection- they even wrote that in their records. That DVM did apologize after at least. His paw was injured and it recovered with no treatment after coming inside. It was probably a muscle strain. Even though they knew he had an orthopedic injury, and had a severe limp., they gave him a shot of convenia for no reason and failed to do an x-ray. When I went to pick him up, I told them to do an x-ray in case something was fractured, it was just pure stupidity, that’s my nice way of describing it, but really it was negligent.

If they were required to warn us and get permission to give a medication, they wouldn’t be doing things like this so often. I’ve heard so many times cats and dogs were given convenia etc. without informing the owner etc.

I am seeing a new veterinarian at that practice now and I told her please write in my cats records they are never to receive convenia. But she still told me when I bring cinnamon there who has to have a sedated appointment that I should tell them again because they might not listen!

There was also a cat Dvm that gave Sybil an injection of one of those drugs for flea ticks and a bunch of other stuff. I can’t remember the name, it was some new drug at the time. I would never have let him do that, he just did it without even telling me or asking me if it was OK.

I am glad she pooped more … one odd thing about Angie having that cancer- she never showed any sign of jaundice and her liver values were not super high.

 

[FeralHearts]

See ate two bites on her own. Progress. I'll take it.

Still refusing food on her own though. I'll be patient and keep slowly trying.

I won't be in the office tomorrow or Monday so that will give me an opportunity to spend some time with her and give her more opportunities.

Also, there need to be laws put in place that require DVM to inform you of every medication they are giving and warn you about all of the possible severe harmful side effects, etc.

They need to ask your permission to give a medication not just give it and that has happened to me before with other drugs too, not just with convenia with Fred.

Isn't there a consent law? Now I want to go look! I guess I always assumed there was as when they go for ultrasounds or other things with risk - I have to sign a waiver.

They should ask for anything - absolutely. I remember when WL lost a tooth, it was the first time I met their current Doc. I remember her poking her head in the exam room and saying she'd like to give her a shot of a long term antibiotic. She was surprised when I said "Absolutely not, no way." and she asked if I had trouble pilling and I let her know not at all. We got pills. That's how it should be done IMHO. She earned my respect right then and there.

Fortunately, Fred was OK but he stopped eating for 2 to 3 days. Also he had no bacterial infection! Or any sign of infection- they even wrote that in their records. That DVM did apologize after at least. His paw was injured and it recovered with no treatment after coming inside. It was probably a muscle strain. Even though they knew he had an orthopedic injury, and had a severe limp., they gave him a shot of convenia for no reason and failed to do an x-ray. When I went to pick him up, I told them to do an x-ray in case something was fractured, it was just pure stupidity, that’s my nice way of describing it, but really it was negligent.

Yikes to this. Just yikes. Where did that vet got to school as that is just purely - not bright IMHO. I am not a vet tech or anything or the sort and I could sort that out on my own with common sense and logic. I'm so sorry you had to experience that.

I am seeing a new veterinarian at that practice now and I told her please write in my cats records they are never to receive convenia. But she still told me when I bring cinnamon there who has to have a sedated appointment that I should tell them again because they might not listen!

Or they might not read the note or might forget too. If I have a lot to go over with a Doc, I now take a notepad with me with the points. I check it off each time we've addressed something and make a note where I need to - otherwise I will forget. I also know how busy our vets are so it would be easy to forget something.

But holy cow batman - remind me to not move where you are. Those vets sounds... questionable. I mean some here are no better but just yikes.

I am glad she pooped more … one odd thing about Angie having that cancer- she never showed any sign of jaundice and her liver values were not super high.

Thanks me too. Those toxins need to come out and that's one big way to do it.

That is really interesting that she never got that. Good too. Very.

 

[FeralHearts]

Update on BH:

PCV/TP - now at 22% but we have a new foe. Ammonia building up in her brain.

Hepatic Encephalopathy is what it sounds like to the Vet. We are increasing the lactulose and making sure she gets enough probiotic in her. We might have to add a small dose of metronidazole long term to see if that helps. We can make that choice next week.

That's pretty much all we can do.

Overall BH is still okay most days but she's back and forth a little more.

------

 

[FeralHearts]

Happy Thanksgiving to all the Canadian and Canadian adjacent souls.

Update on BH:

There are a couple of pieces to this and I would like opinions where you feel comfortable. Don't worry I know we are not vets here and she is going to her Doctor on Tuesday. As it's thanksgiving - there isn't anywhere I can take her today. I'm looking for thoughts , experiences, thought process.

She has slowly and steadily gained some weight this week. Her fur is still soft and eyes bright. She is interested in things going on. She is going to the litter box on her own, with a bit of struggle moving. Her jaundice has not gotten worse at all. Stable there.

She's not moving around as much... and here is the bad part, I can't let her in high places, her balance is off. Yesterday and today I have had to carry her her beds and now have placed things on the floor for her. The one window spot she likes I've placed something she can maneuver as it acts like stairs for her. I'll have to find something to do for my bed for her. She also can't go far without needing to stop and resting.

At this point I'm not sure if it's the illness, ammonia in her brain, or all the meds or what... or if it's time. Honestly the later I'm not convinced on at this point.

The probiotics seem to really screw her up but I followed exactly as I was suppose to - slow to start then build.

We've kept her on the antibiotics longer and I think there is one week left. (6 weeks) That might actually be early this week - I'm not 100% sure.

I'll be talking to her Doc Tuesday to see what we are keeping her on and what we aren't. All these meds I'm sure help and hurt at the same time.

Here's my inquiry with info that might help.

When she was on the really high dose of pred 5mg twice a day - she was doing better. Then the HCT tanked. You really wouldn't have know anything had seriously gone wrong. She was on an upward spiral. Eating on her own, tail up, etc etc. When the pred was reduced to 2.5mg once a day - she started to go down, though the HCT went back up.

I emailed her vet to see if there was a way to balance out the pred. She said we could try 2.5MG twice a day but with monitored HCT. I'm okay with that but then I thought about it... and paused. If we do that and she starts eating again because of the pred and we take the tube out and something happens and we have to take the pred down again - we will be back to this. She has not really tried to eat on her own since that day she ate like crazy and we reduced the pred and added the other meds.

Should I try it? What are your thoughts / experiences / what should I discuss with the vet on this?

Could this probiotic be bothering her? My observations say yes, but I'm not sure and with all the antibiotics and other drugs she's been on her tummy is bound to be a mess. Not sure what to do about that. Is there a way to balance out her tummy that any of you know of that I can bring up to her doc?

I'm puzzled. Seems like logic and science aren't applying to her very well.

 

[F+V]

Happy Thanksgiving!

I'm sorry I have nothing to contribute but what probiotic is she getting at the moment? I've read/heard good things about pediococcus acidilactici and lactobacillus reuteri for cats especially when they are on antibiotics. There are so many probiotics available for cats in many forms but only a handful of these actually reach small intestines to be effective. How's her stool?

 

[FeralHearts]

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thank you! You too!

I'm sorry I have nothing to contribute but what probiotic is she getting at the moment? I've read/heard good things about pediococcus acidilactici and lactobacillus reuteri for cats especially when they are on antibiotics. There are so many probiotics available for cats in many forms but only a handful of these actually reach small intestines to be effective. How's her stool?

It's okay. I appreciate the support a lot and the information. I will look into that.

GI Portfolio - Grey Wolf for Veterinary Professionals - Fiber Boost +GI - it's not really a probiotic IMHO.When I asked for one at the vets this is what they said they use. When I look at the ingredients though - it doesn't appear that's the primary purpose.

When she poops it's a good consistency but still but still pretty much black - which doesn't seem to worry anyone but me. I had hoped the sucralfate would help that - but no luck.

I know she's dehydrated even though they didn't think so last week. ... but she is. I started to add water sessions today to her tube in small increments every couple hours.

Weirdness tonight... she wanted my tea. I put water in a mug and she drank and drank and drank and drank. Seems bowls and water fountains are no longer good enough for her. She wants mugs... so, she wants mugs - she gets mugs!

---------

 

[F+V]

Looks like it is a fiber supplement with added pre & probiotics. Do you think she's dehydrated and thirsty because of the fibers in the supplement? I once gave a 1/8 tsp of psyllium husk to my cat without much water and in the middle of the night she threw up her partially digested food whose texture was quite viscous. Never again... Lactobacillus acidophilus may not survive in large numbers in the GI tract compared to more robust strains like P. acidilactici.

I would be worried about the black color too. I always thought the black or tarry stools meant there was GI bleeding.

She wants what mama is having!

 

[Meowmee]

Thank you! You too!




It's okay. I appreciate the support a lot and the information. I will look into that.

GI Portfolio - Grey Wolf for Veterinary Professionals - Fiber Boost +GI - it's not really a probiotic IMHO.When I asked for one at the vets this is what they said they use. When I look at the ingredients though - it doesn't appear that's the primary purpose.

When she poops it's a good consistency but still but still pretty much black - which doesn't seem to worry anyone but me. I had hoped the sucralfate would help that - but no luck.

I know she's dehydrated even though they didn't think so last week. ... but she is. I started to add water sessions today to her tube in small increments every couple hours.

Weirdness tonight... she wanted my tea. I put water in a mug and she drank and drank and drank and drank. Seems bowls and water fountains are no longer good enough for her. She wants mugs... so, she wants mugs - she gets mugs!

---------

Many of my cats always loved to drink from cups too

I am not sure what’s going on if it’s the probiotic, etc. I don’t give probiotics to my cats because I once gave SB to Merlin and he ended up in the emergency room from being bloated, etc.

Did you ask Dvm about which probiotic is best to give?

This link here says that one of the side effects of sucralfate is black stool, so maybe that’s what’s causing it?

https://tmedweb.tulane.edu/pharmwiki/doku.php/sucralfate

 

[Maggsy]

I've just read this entire thread, I admire and respect your determination to do your very best for your feline friend ...
my Mitzi is recovering from suspected liver impairment of some kind, no definite diagnosis, was told it could be pancreatitus, or something else, she was kept on a drip overnight in vet clinic but didn't need a tube, thank goodness
she needs to lose weight once she's back to eating properly which is going well atm but I'm paranoid in case she has a relapse ...

I hope you're able to spend many happy days with BH, she looks adorable, I wish you all the best

 

[FeralHearts]

Update: She's not doing well. I almost changed her Vet appointment to earlier - but I decided not to. Honestly last night I thought she was going... today... not much better but a bit.

I don't know what's going on at this point. Nothing makes sense. I am holding out for a little hope that this isn't the end for her. Her mind is so very, very willing - I'm not sure her body got the memo though. That breaks me.

Looks like it is a fiber supplement with added pre & probiotics. Do you think she's dehydrated and thirsty because of the fibers in the supplement? I once gave a 1/8 tsp of psyllium husk to my cat without much water and in the middle of the night she threw up her partially digested food whose texture was quite viscous. Never again... Lactobacillus acidophilus may not survive in large numbers in the GI tract compared to more robust strains like P. acidilactici.

Yes, I think dehydration and possible potassium going down do to the lactulose. I also thinks she's bloated and yes that's what that probiotic appears to be - which could make her bloated. She is still constipated too IMHO.

I would be worried about the black color too. I always thought the black or tarry stools meant there was GI bleeding.

Me too. Apparently food and meds can cause it as well.

She wants what mama is having!

LOL yup and I will happily oblige her with whatever she wants.

I've just read this entire thread, I admire and respect your determination to do your very best for your feline friend ...

Thank you. XO I'm trying my best. My biggest hope for her was that she would start eating on her own and get these things off / out of her so she could live her remaining days free - however long that is. I want long of course, but that's no doubt very unrealistic. Still I have hope.

.my Mitzi is recovering from suspected liver impairment of some kind, no definite diagnosis, was told it could be pancreatitis, or something else, she was kept on a drip overnight in vet clinic but didn't need a tube, thank goodness
she needs to lose weight once she's back to eating properly which is going well atm but I'm paranoid in case she has a relapse ...

I'm so sorry you are having to go through that with your baby. BH also has pancreatitis.

Yes, believe me when I say you don't want a tube if you can avoid it. It has benefits like be able to control the food and if you have issues giving meds (I have zero issues there thankfully) it does make that easier too - but the downsides of it are there. Frequent stressful vet visits and always scared something will happen to the tube etc etc.

Depending on how overweight Mitzi is that's going to be important, as if she ever needs a tube her weight will play a roll on if she's a candidate for the surgery. So good you are working on that - it's a tough road... but you can do it.

If you haven't already, ask the Doc about Denamarin/Zentonil/SAMe. They are essentially the same thing but it's a liver protector. It might help with that impairment. I wish I had know about it sooner for two of my kitties. Besides BH, I put another one on it too since he has bile issues / pancreatitis and a host of other things.

Also ask about Mirtazapine on hand for appetite in case she stops eating again. Don't go nuts and shove it in her all the time as that's bad too... but just in case.

PS - How is she feeling now?

.I hope you're able to spend many happy days with BH, she looks adorable, I wish you all the best

Thank you so much.

Many of my cats always loved to drink from cups too

I was stunned and also extremely happy to see she wanted it - she drank a lot and I filled the cup again so she could shove her face into it and drink to her heart's content.

I am not sure what’s going on if it’s the probiotic, etc. I don’t give probiotics to my cats because I once gave SB to Merlin and he ended up in the emergency room from being bloated, etc.

Can you tell me about this please. What happened etc etc. I swear she started to take this dive when I got up to the requested dose.

Did you ask Dvm about which probiotic is best to give?

No, they said they just had the one, so I accepted that. Looking back I should have questioned it.

This link here says that one of the side effects of sucralfate is black stool, so maybe that’s what’s causing it?

http://[URL][URL][URL][URL][URL]https://tmedweb.tulane.edu/pharmwiki/doku.php/sucralfate

[/URL][/URL][/URL][/URL][/URL]

I wish. She's been like this since the surgery. Once it went back dark brown for a few days. It's why we did the sucralfate in case of an ulcer etc from all the meds. Maybe that's is why I can't see a difference in that respect.

EDIT TO ADD: I've emailed her vet what I know so she has some time to think before we see her late this afternoon.

Holding out for some hope. Foolish as that might be. She's a fighter - it's the least I can do for her.

---------

 

[FeralHearts]

Hope is no more.

She is gone. It was at least peaceful.

I'm broken.

 

[Meowmee]

Hope is no more.

She is gone. It was at least peaceful.

I'm broken.

Oh no, I’m so very sorry. I was afraid I was gonna read that here.

It’s always a terrible shock… Remember, we are all here with you and you’re not alone. You did everything you could to make her comfortable towards the end and she loves you for that. I’m glad it was peaceful. That’s a gift for both her and you.

I have forgotten how old BH was. She had a great life with you. You saved her and you saved so many cats and love them so much. You’re a great person. She will be watching over you and waiting for you at the bridge.

Run free sweet BH girl, watch over your mom and your siblings

* I doubt the probiotic had anything to do with it so don’t blame yourself over that. What happened with Merlin was he had diarrhea for a long time after I took him inside, he had c difficile. And I was trying a bunch of different treatments. And I think at some point, someone here recommended SB. one day he was bloated in his abdomen etc it felt hard so I took him into the er because I also thought he was also not urinating. The whole thing was crazy…. on the way there he had pooped a lot of diarrhea, and I didn’t know it, I thought he had vomited because it did not smell like poop… they didn’t tell me until the middle of the exam etc. anyway after that his stomach did not feel hard anymore and he was OK. But I had to wash off poop because they sent him home covered in it. So I assumed after that that he had too much SB and reacted to it and that was what caused it. I think I remember discussing that with one of the DVM at some point.

 

[F+V]

I'm so so sorry for your loss... i honestly did not expect to see that message today. am crying now again BH was much loved and now reunited with Mia in heaven

 

[Maggsy]

So sad, I'm tearing up right now just thinking about all you two have been through, I do believe that our inner energy (soul?) is eternal and she and all our departed friends are now living free in another universe with different bodies ...
please look after yourself

 

[silent meowlook]

I am so sorry.

 

[FeralHearts]

The difference between some vets is outstanding and it shows it what happened tonight with her Doc.

I didn't get to see her today when I went in to drop off BH (and spend some time saying goodbye to her without all those things on her) but she called later with condolences. Most vets simply send a card - she went out of her way to call me. Bless her heart. She went even further to make sure I knew that I had done everything she would have done and let me know she was there if I needed her.

Her Nurse and Doc are top notch. If they ever leave that practise I hope they go together as I'd follow them anywhere I could. They never gave up on her. They didn't brush her off just because she was sick. So many I find do. I was blessed she was in their care.

There was a lot of fluid in her belly. No doubt some blood as well. She threw up a tiny bit before she passed,I saw some small black pieces in it. Clot maybe. The sucralfate probably helped stave some of it off but I think it went fast that you really couldn't do much. Maybe if we had started that sooner - but even then I'm not sure it would have done much good.

The house is strange without her in it and a big light has gone out. The world is a darker place without her. She was my warrior princess, the bravest of the brave, and the rebel child right to the end. Her eyes were bright, fur soft, she was interested in things she saw... her body didn't match her spirit.

When my friend drove us over 2 hours to that first ER clinic, she has cats herself, she said something that describes BH a lot. That when she looked at her - it was nothing she had ever seen before - like she was looking right into your soul. She was like that. There was a deeply aware look with her.

Thank you all so much for being here with us through all of this. It means a lot.

Oh no, I’m so very sorry. I was afraid I was gonna read that here.

It’s always a terrible shock… Remember, we are all here with you and you’re not alone. You did everything you could to make her comfortable towards the end and she loves you for that. I’m glad it was peaceful. That’s a gift for both her and you.

I have forgotten how old BH was. She had a great life with you. You saved her and you saved so many cats and love them so much. You’re a great person. She will be watching over you and waiting for you at the bridge.

Run free sweet BH girl, watch over your mom and your siblings

*Hugs* Thank you. Sadly I knew we were on borrowed time - I had hoped for longer. I wanted so much to see her out of that pink coat, tube out, eating on her own without things in her... even for a while. We didn't get that... but I'm still very grateful for the time. I will always be grateful for that.

I certainly didn't expect her to do what she did - but she never played by the rules. From needing the ER visit on - never. When her HCT was at it's worse and the vet was worried - she was having some of her best days. The science never fully matched - her.

I'm glad the choice was made for a quiet Thanksgiving, normally is very bustling. This year I didn't want that while she wasn't well. A couple of people, movies, with her on my lap purring and trilling occasionally. That memory of her perking up so quickly when I had my tea - and getting her her own mug - that's a keeper. I wish I could describe the look on her face when she did that. It was precious.

She was 11 years and 5 months. The best choice I ever made was bringing her indoors and retiring her from that feral life. I'll never regret it and I hope she didn't either.

Run free my dear one and know I am not the same without you. Keep your sister company until we all get there with you.

* I doubt the probiotic had anything to do with it so don’t blame yourself over that. What happened with Merlin was he had diarrhea for a long time after I took him inside, he had c difficile. And I was trying a bunch of different treatments. And I think at some point, someone here recommended SB. one day he was bloated in his abdomen etc it felt hard so I took him into the er because I also thought he was also not urinating. The whole thing was crazy…. on the way there he had pooped a lot of diarrhea, and I didn’t know it, I thought he had vomited because it did not smell like poop… they didn’t tell me until the middle of the exam etc. anyway after that his stomach did not feel hard anymore and he was OK. But I had to wash off poop because they sent him home covered in it. So I assumed after that that he had too much SB and reacted to it and that was what caused it. I think I remember discussing that with one of the DVM at some point.

Dear lord! Who leaves a cat like that and sends them home. I'm so sorry.

Thank you for sharing that. I know that couldn't have been easy. It may help someone else though.

I'm so so sorry for your loss... i honestly did not expect to see that message today. am crying now again BH was much loved and now reunited with Mia in heaven

*hugs* Thank you. I wasn't expecting that either. I thought she might be close to needing to leave us.. I held on hope that maybe it was a setback. Even small hope... but I didn't expect that.

I believe that her sister came to collect her. I think she was watching all this time - trying to help. I'm glad they are together... but I'll miss them every day. It aches to loss them. Hurt yes - but that deep ache is so much worse. It's something you learn to live with... but I don't think it ever really heals. Not fully.

I had a dream, a lot of dreams, when Mia was sick and even more after she passed - there was one that my friend reminded me of when we were on our way to ER. I checked the date on the dream. It was exactly a year to the day that I had it. It had to do with Mia supervising someone who was sick with the help of a person I couldn't fully make out.

So sad, I'm tearing up right now just thinking about all you two have been through, I do believe that our inner energy (soul?) is eternal and she and all our departed friends are now living free in another universe with different bodies ...
please look after yourself

*hugs* Thank you. Funny you should say that. Her vet was saying tonight hat she doesn't believe they leave us, they are still around just different, and that we can feel their presence sometimes. I let her know I understood. "Energy never dies... it just changes form"

What sucks for us is that we wish we could hold them, watch them play. We miss their physical here. It's ache that runs so deep.

Sleeping without her tonight - will be hard. I'll snuggle her sister a little more but her absence is already felt.

Another reason to keep looking for that time machine. Metatron's cube. One day I'm going to start the strangest thread about what happened with Mia and some of the things with Braveheart. I'm sure I'm not the only one with some odd experiences that can't quite be explained.

I am so sorry.

*Hugs* Thank you and thank you for sharing your knowledge with everyone - you've help me more than once and I think so many more that you don't know about. Your knowledge though your painful, honest, experiences- and not so easy life lessons have blessed so many here. I hope you know that.

-------------

 

[AbbysMom]

I'm so sorry for your loss.