Best Friends Now Fighting, Help!

Moreta

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Hi all, I'm new here, but I have a worrying problem with my two cats (Bodie and Ollie) that I desperately need help with.

Some brief backstory: my husband and I adopted our two cats, about three years ago. They were best buds in the foster home, and were so close that they couldn't cope with life without the other, so we ended up with two cats instead of one. Fast-forward three years, about a month ago, we moved to a new house, in a new city. The cats handled the move, remarkably well, I thought, but just recently, I've noticed a worrying trend in behaviour. It can best be summed up in the incident I witnessed last night.

The sliding door was open a crack to let in some fresh air, the boys were both sitting by it looking out (they're indoor-only cats, but they love their kitty TV). There was a thump against the screen door (I assume one of the neighbourhood cats, but didn't see anything), which startled my boys and they both ended up in that puffed up/freaked out state. Bodie was also doing that yowling/warbling thing that cats do when there's an interloper. At this point, Bodie turned around, saw Ollie, and in what I can only assume was a case of misplaced aggression, totally went for Ollie.

He didn't manage to actually hit Ollie, Ollie bolted under the dining table and hissed, quite vociferously (only time I've ever heard him hiss actually). Bodie calmed down within minutes, but poor Ollie took about half an hour to wind down, and during that time, wouldn't even let me near him, and was a bit twitchy for the rest of the night.

These boys used to be best friends. They spent part of every day playing, sleeping together, and grooming each other. Ollie quite clearly just wants to be friends again, he keeps going to Bodie and asking for grooming and snuggles and Bodie either ignores him, swats him away, or it turns into a fight (without any real intention to harm, but still a fight).

I am at a loss as to what I can do to help my boys be friends again! My current plans are thus:
1. Get some cardboard to block eye-line, hopefully if they can't see the outdoor cat, they won't react so strongly
2. Get cardboard to act as a barrier, so if Bodie flies off the handle again, he can't take it out on Ollie.
3. Purchase cat repellent to try and stop the neighbourhood cats from hanging around our place.
4. Get the Feliway diffuser specifically for multi-cat households where the cats don't get on. We already have the regular one in place, bought it about two weeks ago to help Bodie who wasn't coping with the move. I want to try this one to see if it works/helps.

However, those will have to be bought online and will take time to arrive... does anyone have any ideas or suggestions that might help in the meantime?

Stressed-Out-Kitty-Mamma
 

catlover73

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Could your try using poster board to block the site lines. You could also try calling some local stores to see if they would let you pick-up a box. It seems like they smelled the interloper outside and there is a scent recognition issue between them that is leading to re-directed aggression from Brodie. I would also not open the window again that was open when this issue started. The only thing I can think is to try using a piece of dirty laundry and then rubbing each cat down with it to see if you can re-set the scent they picked up from the interloper. Have you tried using play to re-direct Brodie when he lashes out at Ollie. Is Brodie still trying to attack Ollie or is he just hissing at this point? I am asking this because I went through an issue between my cats after my Sonny was hospitalized for 3 days. My youngest cat Casey is very laid back and has always gotten along with everyone. When Sonny came home Casey hissed at Sonny and then started hissing at my other cat Apollo. Apollo is close to Sonny was grooming him before Casey hissed at him. He was also hissing at us. This went on for 3 days. My vet called to follow up and I asked her for advice. Her advice was that if Casey was just hissing and there were no actual attacks was to just let them work it out. It took another 24 hours for Casey to stop hissing. Everything has been back to normal in my house for a while. If there are attacks going on you may have to separate them and do a re-introduction. I am hoping someone will add advice that has more experience with this issue.
 
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Moreta

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Thank you for the quick reply! and the support in general, I've never had something like this happen before and it's stressing me out!.

I have cannibalised some of the cardboard boxes we used in the move to create barriers to block site lines, and yeah, I won't open that door again.

I hadn't thought of using dirty laundry to re-scent them, that's a great idea. They're both still really good with me, and I seem to be neutral territory or something, because the only times they'll just chill together is when they're with/on me.

I haven't tried using play to redirect, and last night happened so fast I don't think I'd have had time, but I'll keep a cat toy close just in case.

The fighting thing is a bit weird, last night it was definitely aggressive, Ollie clearly felt threatened and was hissing (I may not have made that clear, Ollie was doing the hissing, not Bodie). Usually when they fight it's more of a "leave me alone" vibe. Ollie will make a bid for affection, Bodie will rebuff him, and the ensuing barny will generally be Bodie insisting that Ollie leave him alone. But there's no really aggressive behaviour, or hissing. And it's clear, in those situations, neither of them really mean any harm, they're not afraid to expose their midline, and the biting isn't done with any real intent to actually do physical harm. That's why Bodie flying off the handle last night surprised me so much! Surprised poor Ollie too!
 

JT'w/3

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Welcome Moreta - I'm new here too and joined for reasons similar to you. In Jan I had a very similar incident happen with two of my three boys all of which had been inseparable for 7 yrs! It took some time (a couple of weeks) before they could be together unsupervised again. Almost 6 weeks until I left them together alone. I have a thread on here where some posters gave me suggestions. Looking back they really got over it quickly the first time.

After 6 weeks there was another random fight this time for "Unknown" reasons it was during the day. It's been almost another month and tonight we spent 2 hours in the same room with no fighting. During the day we have happy play time with da-birds, treats etc and lots of positive praise when things go well....our progress has been slow but I'm trying to avoid a relapse. We try to end each session on a good note and then separate them. I always have a crunchy wrapper to crinkle (to distract) if they start to stare and/or fight.

A couple of things I've learned ... first and foremost, try to figure out what's visiting outside because until it's gone the fights will most likely continue. We put up Ring cameras and have seen a racoon, cat, bobcat and a fox! I recently installed a motion sensor water sprayer that seems to be working on the racoon. Even if we can't see what's out there our kitties can smell it! Also, I think the naughty visitors mark their territory etc and the scent hangs around so if the scent comes in the window, slider etc. even during the day, it could cause problems.

I use a screen door to separate them after good play sessions because for one of my guys it's just still to stressful to be with his brother :( his brother really wants things to be normal like Ollie and he won't give him space

Also, call me stupid but I had no idea that if I yelled, scolded, reprimanded them for fighting I was only making it worse. I thought it would make them stop. WRONG! Cats don't respond well to negative reactions but they really to respond to praise.

I'm no expert and I'm sure one of these more experience posters will send you links to articles. They are all really good so try to read them. Lots of good ideas!

I'm so sorry your are going through this. I really do understand what you are going through.
 
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Moreta

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Thanks JT

We live in Australia, so raccoons and foxes definitely aren't the problem! There are three neighbourhood cats in the area (nicknamed by us NC, 9 Yards, and Gandy). NC isn't a problem at all. I have seen Ollie react badly to 9 Yards, and my husband has seen Bodie react badly to Gandy; so my guess is one or both of them is the problem. I am going to buy a sonic deterrent to try and keep the outside cats away.

Fortunately, they can be in the same room, and during the day are likely to be found sleeping on the cat tree, Bodie on one level, Ollie on another (our cat tree is huge, nearly 2m tall - over 6ft). That is one of the few items that has both their scents on it really strongly, which made me think that maybe that has something to do with it as well, since I know cats are very scent oriented. So what I've done is take an old tea towel and put it on the spot where Ollie usually sleeps. I'm going to let that get all nice and Ollie-smelling, and then I'm going to take it and put it under Bodie's food bowl, so he can relearn that Ollie = good. I might also grab another one and once it's scented, but it where Bodie most likes to sleep.

Thanks for the reminder about not yelling! I do try not to do that, but sometimes I get so frustrated. Though last night it was more, sobbing and begging them to just play nicely. I don't usually yell, but it helps to be reminded not to.

I think my own expectations are also getting in the way. They settled so fast after we adopted them... we adopted Bodie first, after a week, it was clear he wasn't coping on his own, so we adopted Ollie. A week after that, they were both out of their shells and being very affectionate. I guess I was expecting them to re-settle after the move faster than they did.
 

rubysmama

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Hello and welcome to The Cat Site. :wave2: It is quite a common occurrence for something to startle a cat, and him to put the blame on his "sibling".

Here's a couple TCS articles that may have some helpful ideas:
How To Deal With Non-recognition Aggression In Cats
Re-directed Aggression In Cats
How To Safely Break Up A Cat Fight

If the behavior doesn't improve, you might have to go so far as to separate them into different rooms, and do a cat introduction as though they were strangers. Hopefully it won't come to that.
How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction
 
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Moreta

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Thanks, I'll make sure to read those.

Bodie had another yowling moment last night (fortunately, Ollie was well out of the way). I wish it wasn't such an awful sound, he sounded like he was being murdered! But some good came of it, one of our neighbours came out of her house to see what the ruckus was about (she owns NC, who got so spooked by the noise, she hid under the bed), and she told me something very interesting. Apparently, Gandy is a tom.

All of a sudden, everything makes so much more sense! Next time I see the neighbour I'm going to ask if she knows who owns Gandy, I'd love for her to say he's a stray so I can arrange for TNR for him!

Finding out he's a tom has greatly reduced my stress levels though. Now I understand all the reactions, I feel like I can do a better job of handling the situation.
 
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