Hi everyone!
First a little background: We have 2 resident cats, semi-feral orange tabby girl approx 7 years old- Sherbert, and a 3 year old tux male found as a kitten- Kubo. They get along beautifully! I feel like the luckiest cat mom in the world with these 2. Fast forward to 3 months ago when boyfriend met a shelter kitty, Mochi, female tuxedo apron 3 1/2 years old.
Long story short, it's been a long 3 months! We're doing screen door feedings, scent swaps, room swaps, etc.. We've had some bad run ins between all of them. Shelter kitty Mochi is extremely territorial and will attack resident cats just because she can. So of course, resident cats are scared of her! I feel like every time a bad run-in happens, its like taking another step back. Kubo will growl even if I just pick him up and carry him anywhere near Mochis room. I should also add that Mochi, 3 1/2, has been in 3 different shelters in her short life (through no fault of her own), and I feel pretty confident saying she's spent over a year of her life living in a cage. We understand this and are trying to be patient, taking things very slow. She has calmed down immensely in these 3 months and she really is the sweetest cat! I walk into her room and she wraps her tail around my left, rubs up against me, she snuggles up between my legs when I sleep with her. She is SO sweet! She just doesn't deal well with other cats.
Well, I was talking with an old co-worker that I haven't seen in ages who is also a cat mom. She has maybe 7 or 8 resident cats and she also fosters. I was telling her about our issues, and she was almost laughing at me, saying that I just need to throw them all together and let them "work it out". Now, everything I've read and everything I know says that this is the absolute WRONG thing to do because it only determines who will be the bully and who will be harassed for the rest of their days. Am I wrong I wrong in this? Mind you, after she told me this, she also added that she's had to separate her cats on many occasions because of fighting and one cat she permanently left outside because indoor cats were harassing her so much that she didn't feel safe leaving this other cat in the house. SOoooooo... honestly, am I crazy? Also, it's been 3 months, should we be further along by now? We're still doing the screen door feedings. Sometimes it's ok. Sometimes not.
First a little background: We have 2 resident cats, semi-feral orange tabby girl approx 7 years old- Sherbert, and a 3 year old tux male found as a kitten- Kubo. They get along beautifully! I feel like the luckiest cat mom in the world with these 2. Fast forward to 3 months ago when boyfriend met a shelter kitty, Mochi, female tuxedo apron 3 1/2 years old.
Long story short, it's been a long 3 months! We're doing screen door feedings, scent swaps, room swaps, etc.. We've had some bad run ins between all of them. Shelter kitty Mochi is extremely territorial and will attack resident cats just because she can. So of course, resident cats are scared of her! I feel like every time a bad run-in happens, its like taking another step back. Kubo will growl even if I just pick him up and carry him anywhere near Mochis room. I should also add that Mochi, 3 1/2, has been in 3 different shelters in her short life (through no fault of her own), and I feel pretty confident saying she's spent over a year of her life living in a cage. We understand this and are trying to be patient, taking things very slow. She has calmed down immensely in these 3 months and she really is the sweetest cat! I walk into her room and she wraps her tail around my left, rubs up against me, she snuggles up between my legs when I sleep with her. She is SO sweet! She just doesn't deal well with other cats.
Well, I was talking with an old co-worker that I haven't seen in ages who is also a cat mom. She has maybe 7 or 8 resident cats and she also fosters. I was telling her about our issues, and she was almost laughing at me, saying that I just need to throw them all together and let them "work it out". Now, everything I've read and everything I know says that this is the absolute WRONG thing to do because it only determines who will be the bully and who will be harassed for the rest of their days. Am I wrong I wrong in this? Mind you, after she told me this, she also added that she's had to separate her cats on many occasions because of fighting and one cat she permanently left outside because indoor cats were harassing her so much that she didn't feel safe leaving this other cat in the house. SOoooooo... honestly, am I crazy? Also, it's been 3 months, should we be further along by now? We're still doing the screen door feedings. Sometimes it's ok. Sometimes not.