Am I bad cat mom?

C@thulhu

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Hello everyone! I’m a new parent to a 3 month old kitten. I’ve only had her for 4 days but I feel like I’m doing everything wrong. She’s a spunky little girl with a ton of energy, but despite the amount of time I play with her she doesn’t seem to settle down. I’m in college and starting a new job next week, thankfully I’ll be working from home until further notice but I’m so anxious about being a good mom towards my fur baby. I think she’s picking up on my energy. Does anyone have any advice or stories to help me with the adjustment as well as making her less anxious. Right now I’m mostly struggling to get her to take naps. Thank you!
 

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abyeb

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Hi there! Your kitten is very cute! Is she your first cat? If so, I would recommend checking out this article: First-time Cat Owner’s Guide – TheCatSite Articles

Kittens will have a lot of energy, but that doesn’t mean you have to play with her 24/7. Just be sure to get plenty of toys for her to play with while you’re not around. It doesn’t need to be anything expensive; ping pong balls, empty toilet paper rolls, and cardboard boxes are all great fun for cats! If you’re feeding dry food, you can try putting some kibble inside a treat dispensing ball.

And finally, remember to enjoy this time with your kitten, and take lots of pictures (they grow up so fast). It’s very common for cat owners to feel overwhelmed at first (this does NOT in anyway make you a “bad cat mom”), but you’ll be a pro in no time. And, of course, if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask on TCS.
 

fionasmom

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First-time Cat Owner’s Guide – TheCatSite Articles
How To Help A New Cat Adjust To Your Home – TheCatSite Articles
Bringing Home A New Cat – The Complete Guide – TheCatSite Articles
How To Choose The Best Toy For Your Cat – TheCatSite Articles

Some of these articles might help. A couple are written from the point of view of just having walked in the door with the new cat, which is not exactly where you are, but they might still be of use. Congratulations on the new kitty! She is adorable and I have owned several black cats who were incredible creatures. Your baby is a kitten and they can go non stop. If you provide a period of playtime, she might get used to taking a nap, especially once she settles in. Right now this is all new and exciting to her and she wants to play and explore.
 
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C@thulhu

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Hi there! Your kitten is very cute! Is she your first cat? If so, I would recommend checking out this article: First-time Cat Owner’s Guide – TheCatSite Articles

Kittens will have a lot of energy, but that doesn’t mean you have to play with her 24/7. Just be sure to get plenty of toys for her to play with while you’re not around. It doesn’t need to be anything expensive; ping pong balls, empty toilet paper rolls, and cardboard boxes are all great fun for cats! If you’re feeding dry food, you can try putting some kibble inside a treat dispensing ball.

And finally, remember to enjoy this time with your kitten, and take lots of pictures (they grow up so fast). It’s very common for cat owners to feel overwhelmed at first (this does NOT in anyway make you a “bad cat mom”), but you’ll be a pro in no time. And, of course, if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask on TCS.
She is not my first cat, I’ve had kitties since I was 8 years old. But she’s the youngest kitten I’ve ever had. I will definitely read the article though! Is there anything I can give her to help her relax? Thank you for your kindness!
 

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Hi and welcome! She is so cute!! :cloud9:

You're not doing anything wrong. Kittens are bundles of energy. Those articles listed above are great. I suggest a wand toy such as Da Bird. Most cats and kittens can't resist them and it's good to teach them hands free play. Kittens are notorious for nibbling on things they want to play with and don't realize that hands and fingers are not toys.
 
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C@thulhu

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Hi and welcome! She is so cute!! :cloud9:

You're not doing anything wrong. Kittens are bundles of energy. Those articles listed above are great. I suggest a wand toy such as Da Bird. Most cats and kittens can't resist them and it's good to teach them hands free play. Kittens are notorious for nibbling on things they want to play with and don't realize that hands and fingers are not toys.
Thank you so much! I’ve been playing with a wand toy and she has responded super well!
 
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C@thulhu

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Hello everyone! I’m a new parent to a 3 month old kitten. I’ve only had her for 4 days but I feel like I’m doing everything wrong. She’s a spunky little girl with a ton of energy, but despite the amount of time I play with her she doesn’t seem to settle down. I’m in college and starting a new job next week, thankfully I’ll be working from home until further notice but I’m so anxious about being a good mom towards my fur baby. I think she’s picking up on my energy. Does anyone have any advice or stories to help me with the adjustment as well as making her less anxious. Right now I’m mostly struggling to get her to take naps. Thank you!
Ps. How do I stop her climbing on my soft surfaces? I have provided a cat tree and scratching posts but she still wants to climb the chairs!
 

fionasmom

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To her it is all one big play house right now and one big cat tree. If you google something like "furniture protectors for cats" or something similar there will be suggestions. There is a product called Kittyguard that you might look at. Possibly just redirecting her to the cat tree will help.
 
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C@thulhu

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To her it is all one big play house right now and one big cat tree. If you google something like "furniture protectors for cats" or something similar there will be suggestions. There is a product called Kittyguard that you might look at. Possibly just redirecting her to the cat tree will help.
Yeah, I have put plastic covers on all my furniture, that's what my family has done in the past. She definitely thinks everything is a toy!
 

Kat0121

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To her it is all one big play house right now and one big cat tree. If you google something like "furniture protectors for cats" or something similar there will be suggestions. There is a product called Kittyguard that you might look at. Possibly just redirecting her to the cat tree will help.
Agreed. Using catnip spray on the things you want her to use can help too as many cats cannot resist it. Please DO NOT use spray bottles with water as a deterrent as they do NOT work. They will cause your cat to lose trust in you and will just teach her to misbehave when you are not around to use it. I just added that as an FYI because a lot of people think that works. It does not. Positive reinforcement works best with cats. When she does what you want, praise her and give her a yummy treat.
 
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C@thulhu

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Agreed. Using catnip spray on the things you want her to use can help too as many cats cannot resist it. Please DO NOT use spray bottles with water as a deterrent as they do NOT work. They will cause your cat to lose trust in you and will just teach her to misbehave when you are not around to use it. I just added that as an FYI because a lot of people think that works. It does not. Positive reinforcement works best with cats. When she does what you want, praise her and give her a yummy treat.
Thank you, I definitely don't want her to lose trust in me! So far I have just been calmly picking her up and placing her next to her kitty tree. But, I notice she starts climbing if I am not paying attention to her. But, she is still learning
 

Kat0121

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Thank you, I definitely don't want her to lose trust in me! So far I have just been calmly picking her up and placing her next to her kitty tree. But, I notice she starts climbing if I am not paying attention to her. But, she is still learning
Yes she is. I think she's going to be just fine. You're doing a great job! Has she been spayed yet?
 

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Kittens are just one big whirlwind of activity with no end in sight, they do calm down however in about two years and become couch potatoes. From about 6 weeks to 1-year-olds are the worst. Like a human new parent, there will be sleepless nights and worries, but with help from sites like us and others, you will muddle through it and become a real parent in no time. There is really no right or wrong way, just feed them as much as they want often, play with them when you can, keep them from hurting themselves and from destroying your house, and go on with your life. Cats are fascinating creatures, unlike dogs, you earn a cat's love. It is one of life's treasures......
 
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C@thulhu

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Kittens are just one big whirlwind of activity with no end in sight, they do calm down however in about two years and become couch potatoes. From about 6 weeks to 1-year-olds are the worst. Like a human new parent, there will be sleepless nights and worries, but with help from sites like us and others, you will muddle through it and become a real parent in no time. There is really no right or wrong way, just feed them as much as they want often, play with them when you can, keep them from hurting themselves and from destroying your house, and go on with your life. Cats are fascinating creatures, unlike dogs, you earn a cat's love. It is one of life's treasures......
Haha, thank you! I am definitely used to coach potatoes! I grew up with 2 wonderful cats. I definitely don't remember them being this active! But, she is a wonderful little girl, she just has more energy than she knows what to do with! I am extremely grateful that I found this forum!
 

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Ps. How do I stop her climbing on my soft surfaces? I have provided a cat tree and scratching posts but she still wants to climb the chairs!
I am still learning with the kitten I adopted last fall, but I decided to be strategic about the surfaces I would and wouldn't let her onto, because otherwise it seemed like a losing battle. But if I place a low-sided cardboard box on a table or couch (these days, the kind you get at the liquor store, but a smaller box when she was younger), she will usually naturally confine herself to the box. Unless there is a particularly appealing blanket (hello, sheepkin!).
 

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Also, just a note of sympathy and support. I felt the same way you did, especially when I would see articles that advised you to play with your kitty until you wore her out. In my experience of one, that never happened. But I did have toys she could also play with, safely, on her own, to burn off energy after I had tired or had to start working. I don't think I've ruined her yet, though the jury is still out 😛
 
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C@thulhu

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Also, just a note of sympathy and support. I felt the same way you did, especially when I would see articles that advised you to play with your kitty until you wore her out. In my experience of one, that never happened. But I did have toys she could also play with, safely, on her own, to burn off energy after I had tired or had to start working. I don't think I've ruined her yet, though the jury is still out 😛
Thank you so much! I love her so much, I just want her to be a happy kitty!
 

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Another kitten is an option They wear each other out! My 2 boys will turn 2 yrs this month They calmed way down at the 1 yr mark But they still love being together I never worry about them being lonely I actually think 2 is easier than 1 if you are in a position to get another Enjoy
 
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C@thulhu

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Another kitten is an option They wear each other out! My 2 boys will turn 2 yrs this month They calmed way down at the 1 yr mark But they still love being together I never worry about them being lonely I actually think 2 is easier than 1 if you are in a position to get another Enjoy
Unfortunately I can’t afford two, and I don’t have time for two as much as I’d love to have all the kitties in the world.
 
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