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Aggressive Resident - It Just Got Real. No Idea How To Help Him.

Discussion in 'Cat Behavior' started by FeralHearts, Sep 18, 2018.

  1. Jcatbird

    Jcatbird TCS Member Top Cat

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    Dec 5, 2017
    Southern U.S.
    Thank goodness! This has been one of those giant jigsaw puzzles that is all one color and no picture!:runaround::eek3: I’m so relieved things are getting better. Merry, Merry to all!
     
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  2. FeralHearts

    FeralHearts Thread Starter TCS Member Alpha Cat

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    Jul 4, 2018
    Canada
    *hugs* Yes, slowly the puzzle is taking color, but I swear it's a mood ring puzzle as the colors keep changing!

    ---------------

    Merry belated Christmas and Happy New year! I'm sorry I've not been around. I've had my hands seriosuly full with the kitties.

    Update: Charlie got sick for a few days. He had trouble keeping his food down so I've been watching that. The past 48 hours he seems to be okay. We're staying the course for his anti-biotics and watching. His appetite is okay still. Some days not so great, others hungry. His dry food seems to be bothering him. His appointment for the needle in the bladder (Cystocentesis) is set for the 28th first thing in the morning. His meds will be finished on the 22nd.

    He's a bit depressed the last day or two. That's making me a bit depressed.

    Good news: Mia is being a bit brave - she discovered if she goes to the very top of her tree she can look out the window - YAY - and a few times she's ventured up two flights of stairs to the bedroom area exploring. Only a couple times though, but that's still something.

    Braveheart - she has this bad rash, hair loss and I have no idea what happened. It could be an allergic reaction to a new blanket - so I took that away and washed her other ones. It could be what I've fed her as I've been trying to add various foods (new) in small amounts mixed with her normal food. (Same with W.L and Mia) so they don't get finicky like Charlie. It could be from a fight. It could be stress. She has an appointment with the vet on the 14th if it doesn't clear up. *sigh* I've been gently washing the area with Chamomile tea to help sooth her. It seems to help. It's mostly on her underbelly by the legs and a small but on her neck that feel like puncture wounds. He fur is otherwise very soft and healthy.

    W.L. seems to have very dry skin so I'm going to look at getting some Salmon oil to add to the food.

    I'm a bit depressed as sometimes I think I've saved the other three at Charlies expense and that he will never be happy and that makes me really, really sad.... but I keeping hoping that it's temporary and he'll realize there is enough room and enough love etc for everyone and that having companions is a good thing. I'd settle for peace and being able to trust them all with the run of the house 24/7.

    I've not had time, as you can imagine, with all this to keep up here atm. Hopefully I can relax soon and get caught up here this week / weekend. I've really missed everyone badly.

    Edit to add: Night time they are still all separated. The girls downstairs, Charlie up as he simply can't be trusted. One second he's nice and okay with them - the next I worry someone's going to get hurt as he doesn't know when to leave well enough alone.

    I've also - admittedly had fleeting thoughts that maybe the girls would be better off re-homed but I know that's most likely not true and even if it might be - with the health issues and age - likely not possible so I have to hope and pray that it all works out.
     
    Last edited: Jan 2, 2019
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  3. Jcatbird

    Jcatbird TCS Member Top Cat

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    Dec 5, 2017
    Southern U.S.
    Hey! Missed you! Glad you checked in. I know you are down but reading it all..... it really isn’t worse. It’s definitely a continuation that wears you down but some kitty progress! Feeling like this huh?:seesaw:You really shouldn’t feel guilty in relation to Charlie. Even if the girls weren’t there he would have problems due to his health issues. Sometimes we all get grouchy if we are getting poked and prodded and just tired of going to doctors. I personally have done that.:livid: Stop poking me or I’m gonna poke the next person I see!

    The fur thing is something I am dealing with too. Yep! I think with mine ( when I say mine, I mean the cats, not me) it is an allergy to flea bites. It only takes one to start a reaction. I found a kitten at my front door and did two things. I brought her in ( yes I gave her a Capstar immediately but a flea could have escaped) and I took her to the vet. Dog gone it! Seems like every time I take one to the vet, well...... let’s just say, somebody at the vet office has fleas. Wonder if it’s the vet? :flail:Hope not but I do suspect that going from one animal to another they could pick up a hitchhiker! Anyway, dealing with it here too. Maybe you and I both need to drink some Chamomile?

    Several of my cats spent a couple of days throwing up. Hmmmmm. Don’t know why but it stopped as quickly as it started. Scared me for a minute. Now I am wondering about the clothes washing powder I had used. Ran out of my usual and grabbed a couple of samples I had on hand. I have rewashed everything and tossed the samples. Also could have just been something coming in the air from outside. We had flooding around here big time. Lots of molds and Mildew near the swamp with 99% humidity on a dry day! On flood days everything stays damp. Including us! I’ve got heat and fans trying to dry the air inside but it’s been hot outside! Winter, and we’re sweltering. The cats like the heaters at least! I’m sitting in front of the fan but they still love to curl up in front of a heater every time! I have to use a heating pad on my back or I wouldn’t go near it but they ALL want to lay on it year round. They can’t all have achy bones!

    You aren’t alone in the spooked cat thing either. As I write, BJ is out of his house and hiding under the sofa. :ohwell: I was cleaning his house and he just got nervous. Once under the sofa he felt safe and every time I reach under to get him he decides to eat me. Just for fun. I tried moving the sofa to get to him for petting and calming but he just laughed at me and scored under it where I had moved it. BJ!!!! Really?!?!? Yesterday you were a sweet lap cat! He isn’t fond of me carrying him. Holding is great but carrying , not so much. Maybe the look on his face would make you feel better. Here!

    BJ no like carrying! BJ not baby kitten. Oh the indignity of it all....... humans!
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    If you didn’t laugh at that photo, call 911 cuz you must have done this.:thud:You are not alone. I hope something here made you smile at least once. XOXO
     
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  4. Furballsmom

    Furballsmom TCS Member Top Cat

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    Jan 9, 2018
    Colorado USA
    We missed you too :)
    I think you're ok, you don't need to re-home them.
    You're doing an awesome job of handling it all!!
     
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  5. FeralHearts

    FeralHearts Thread Starter TCS Member Alpha Cat

    409
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    Jul 4, 2018
    Canada
    Nearing the end of his medication - *knock on wood* Looking good. Charlie's pee in the litter looking lighter so I am hoping this means the blood has cleared up and maybe the bacteria too! He's all scheduled for the 28th - waiting with bated breath in the hopes that we get a full recovery. Then all of my questions come about re-occurrence and the dread - *GASP* food trial.

    :-) xoxoxox

    True - it's the wearing down. It is very much like a sea-saw - you are totally right. Charlie is just such a territorial guy. He's now learned how to hop up where W.L sleeps - pisses her off - she hides behind the couch growling at him and I think "dude! do you not understand what she is saying?!" Then he sits on the couch and waits for her. *sigh*

    B.H is the one I get concerned with - holy cow. She lets out this scream, seriously - a scream - if he gets too close and again I think "Dude! Do you not understand that she will cut you if you continue!" and "Chhhhaaaarrlliieeee. No. Don't do that mister." and I watch carefully and hope there is no fight. So far no bloodshed - please let it stay that way - but I keep a close watch when I see that. He seems to not go closer after she screams - but I watch carefully as I don't want him to push her boundary as I know she means business.

    He's def getting warning shots from them but doesn't seem to clue in that this is not a safe situation and to Back off. *sigh* I keep hoping one day he'll give the bad behavior up. I'm trying to find new ways to exhaust him as he does have a lot of energy and I think that's part of the issue. I think another part is that area doesn't smell enough like him. If I can 1. Merge the scents a bit more and 2. get him played out enough - that might help.

    Yes - him not being 100% certainly doesn't help. He still sleeps beside my head at night and I remind him that "see - you've not been kicked out. You are still my baby."



    Seems you and I are suffering the same kitty afflictions for sure! B.H seems to be healing. More and more I'm thinking it was a fight based on where the spots are... throat and ear that look like punctures and lower belly, leg area. It would have been with one of her sisters. I'm still keeping a very watchful eye.

    Yes -I often wonder too about taking them into the vets what little hitchhikers might come home with them!

    *hands you some Camomile tea* Sets some out ready for when furballs mom and Kflowers pop by.

    We have a wet cold here and humid summers, so I understand about that. It is lucky cats like heat!

    For you - it might be the washing powder in combination maybe? Cats really don't like change of any kind, do they?! ;-)

    HAHAH! BJ does not look impressed with you at all! Wow. LOL Lucky he likes you. His face just made me laugh though. LOL

    You guys always make me feel better. Thank you :-) I am not alone!!!! :-) Yes, I smiled!



    XOXOXOXOXO thank you!

    I needed to hear that. Re-homing is not an option... every now and again I just feel awful for them and think someone would do better for them or that they'd be happier elsewhere. That's exaustion thinking no doubt.
     
    Last edited: Jan 11, 2019
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  6. Furballsmom

    Furballsmom TCS Member Top Cat

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    Jan 9, 2018
    Colorado USA
    :thumbsup:. :cloud9:
     
    FeralHearts and Jcatbird purraised this.

  7. Jcatbird

    Jcatbird TCS Member Top Cat

    1,832
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    Dec 5, 2017
    Southern U.S.
    All children have their moments and sometimes they are extended periods of time. A friend often sent her human child to me for the day for a “ time out”! Too bad that won’t work with cat! Although we have considered a kitty camp. Boots and mitten camp! Lol Honestly, I think we need time at camp ourselves. I could use a little canoe trip or some hiking! :lol:
    BJ sends his purrs to Charlie! Two of a kind!
    I’m glad to hear that Brave Heart is on the mend! Maybe snipping cat claws is in everyone’s future?!?!?
    My kitty seemed to be allergic to an “improved” form of our usual cat litter. Aaaaarrrggghhh! Some improvement! Fur is growing back though.
    White Label is being bullied. Cats will do that! I still think it is a combination of things with Charlie. Feeling poopy, still adjusting to the others to make sure they know he is top cat and just plain jealous. I have noticed with BJ adjusting that he mostly tries to eat me when he is nervous about the other cats. He accepts some but is frightened by others. I have another cat, Precious, that is even worse about it and aggressive when upset. I put him in his safe haven every time an argument starts and he calms immediately. It’s just a cage in the same room as the others but to him, It’s his house. Has Charlie got a safe house where you can give him a time out period? It might help. Sometimes if many cats get skittish, I put a lot of them in their safe place at once. Peace on earth happens! Lol It’s their own private space and everyone knows it. I close their door but don’t latch it. They come back out when they want to. You might have to latch it in the beginning to let them know that no one can get in but once they all know the rules, it really has worked here. Of course my house looks a little odd! :lol:

    This is my great room. Great for cats! Not so much for me! Lol

    Each cage or carrier has a blanket or some form of cover to provide a secure feeling. Only one has a cat in it right now but they are there if anyone wants to go have privacy. Whistle and Flowers will actually shut their own door when they go in! :flail:
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    There is a cat laying on top of this cage. Just noticed the furry feet! That is my old girl Smokey. She gets in that box beside her which is just a cover for a litter box. She doesn’t like it on the litter box but loves it as a cover over her bed!:dunno:
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    Right now I am re painting a room and because I don’t want the cats out there........ they are all out there! :doh:
    Cats! What’re ya gonna do?
    XOXOXO
     
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  8. Kflowers

    Kflowers TCS Member Top Cat

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    Jul 28, 2018
    @Beyond Confused please read page 10 post 187 by @Jcatbird about dealing with rowdy cats. The important part for you is the paragraph beginning White Label. I think what she says is really important and I'm down a finger for typing.
     
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  9. Jcatbird

    Jcatbird TCS Member Top Cat

    1,832
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    Dec 5, 2017
    Southern U.S.
    @Kflowers I’m so sorry to hear you are down a typing finger! That really does make it hard to respond here. I’m glad you were able to find something here relevant to what you wanted to express. I hope you heal quickly!:alright:
     
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  10. Kflowers

    Kflowers TCS Member Top Cat

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    Jul 28, 2018
    Seem to be down more than a typing finger. Trying again. I want to send this to @momof3b1g please check out Jcatbird's post #187 on page 10 of this thread. You might find the long paragraph beginning White Label of use.
     
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